Breed of Envy (The Breed Chronicles, #02)

by Jordan, Lanie

  “Pfft. Please. Like I need them to know what you’re doing.” I paused. “Shaking your head. And now you’re probably gaping at me like a fish out of water. How am I doing?”

  “Eerily well. Not sure if I should be impressed or freaked out,” he said, laughing. “Now stop long enough for me to give you your present.”

  I heard his footsteps before I felt the bed shift. He put his hands over my eyes. “Come on.”

  Crawling off my bed was awkward, but I managed it without causing damage to anyone, so I considered it a success.

  “Ready?”

  I nodded. “Yup.”

  “Okay.” Linc moved his hands away. “Open your eyes.”

  I did, but then I raised my eyebrows when I couldn’t see anything but him. “Are you my present?”

  “Not quite.” His lips raised in a grin. “For someone who’s easy to please when it comes to gifts, you’re actually hard to shop for.”

  “Thanks. I think?”

  “I hope you like it,” he said and stepped aside.

  At first I didn’t see anything, but then I saw an image appear above the holo-disc. It wasn’t a tree but pictures of Linc, Tasha, and me. There were a few from Halloween, including one of Linc jumping up when the holo-zombie tried grabbing him. I laughed. “Okay, now that’s impressive.”

  “Hold on. That’s not the actual gift part yet.” He looked around. “Where’s your tablet?”

  “Why? Did you borrow that, too?”

  “Funny. No, I didn’t borrow it.” He scratched his head and coughed. “I just had Charlie hack into it,” he said quickly, turning away from me to search my desk.

  “Two crimes in one day.” I nodded. “Not bad, Stone.”

  He looked over his shoulder, grinned. “What can I say? I excel at—”

  “Criminal behavior?” I smiled sweetly.

  “Fair enough. Seriously, where’s your tablet?”

  “Should be there.” Brushing him aside, I looked down at my desk. It’d been there last night. I shuffled some papers around, found it underneath a stack of drawings. “Here.”

  His gaze was on the sketches. “Still drawing it?”

  “Yeah.” It was the picture of the demon I was after. Ever since Halloween, I’d been drawing it, trying to get it just right. I figured if I could get a clear image of it on paper, that maybe it’d help Peter or Greene recognize it. But the drawing wasn’t right. It never was.

  He took my hand and gave it a hard squeeze. “We’ll find it.”

  “Thanks.” I focused on his hand, on the warmth and strength of his touch, and made myself smile. “Now, where’s my pressie?”

  An awkward look crossed his face. “Now I’m not so sure.”

  “What? Why?”

  “Might be bad timing.”

  “How? I only get one birthday a year. So, if the timing is bad, it’s kinda always going to be bad.”

  “It’s not the day that’s wrong. It’s…hell. I’ll show you. Just keep in mind it didn’t seem so bad before now.”

  “Linc.” I said his name with an impatient sigh. “Whatever it is, I’m sure it’s fine. Don’t worry about it.”

  He nodded, but he didn’t look really convinced. “Charlie installed this program on it. It controls the images,” he said, showing me the program that was cleverly named ‘Image Controller’.

  I grinned. “Think I could’ve figured that one out on my own.”

  His lips twitched. “Probably.” He tapped a few buttons on the screen. When he was done, he set the tablet back on the desk. “Anyway. Happy Birthday, Jade.” He shifted in place, like he was uncomfortable, scratched his head, then pointed to the holo-disc.

  I still saw images of Linc and Tasha appear and disappear. I loved the pictures, but I wasn’t sure this is what he was trying to point out. Maybe I was missing it? “What am I supposed to be —oh.” My eyes went wide.

  “I probably should have thought more about it. But it seemed right. Before today, anyway.”

  I tried to respond but found my mouth was too dry, too slack to move. There were other images now, of a smiling man and a woman. For half a second, I almost didn’t recognize the couple. But then I did.

  My mom. My dad.

  My stomach fluttered and twisted at the same time as I moved closer to the dresser, tilting my head to the side as I studied their faces.

  Seeing their faces—smiling—lifted something inside me. But at the same time, it left me feeling slightly hollowed out.

  I barely remembered my dad because he’d died when I was so young, so I expected the images to be kind of...unrecognizable. But I’d seen my mom’s face every day for fourteen years. It’d changed a lot since her time at the CGE. Another image replaced that one and I found myself shaking my head. Yeah, she’d changed over the years, but it was still her. The same face. Maybe a little softer around the edges, and her eyes weren’t so guarded.

  It didn’t hit me until seeing that image, but that’s exactly what her eyes had been for as long as I could remember. Guarded. Unsure. I hadn’t thought her unhappy before—at all, because she’d rarely been seen without a smile—but seeing these pictures… Maybe I knew even less about her than I thought.

  I loved the gift. It made me a lot happy, and maybe a little sad. But a good sad. The kind good people should leave behind when they’re gone.

  The image changed again, this one a picture of my mom and dad kissing. Just their lips barely brushing together. Even only seeing half their faces, the love she must have felt for him—my dad!—was obvious. Painfully obvious. I couldn’t even explain why. There was just something in the expression, so raw, so full, that it made my heart want to soar.

  My gaze went to Linc. He gave me a small, unsure smile. I didn’t like the uncertainty of it, but I loved his smiles in general. More, I loved that he understood me, that he really got me. Loved that he’d thought to ask for something I hadn’t thought to ask for myself. Loved that he probably knew it’d make me happy, and then worried it’d make me a little sad, too.

  And maybe it wasn’t just her love I was seeing. But maybe it was my own, too.

  I hadn’t let myself think about it, not really. We’d all had so much going on this Phase. Finding the demon that had killed my family, finding Linc’s demon, our class work. Just…everything. But my feelings for him, for Linc, had been building since the first day I’d joined.

  My heart thumped in my chest. Not quite painfully, but not quite not, either. It was the strangest feeling, I thought. Everything inside me felt so big and warm and happy.

  “Linc.” My voice sounded choked, even to my own ears. I opened my mouth to say something else, though I had no idea what.

  “It was stupid. I didn’t think about it before, how it might be…I don’t know. Painful, I guess, seeing them. I’ll take it back—”

  I swallowed back a lump and grabbed his arm as he started to move forward. “Touch it and I’ll break your hands.”

  He turned to face me. “Sorry.”

  I grabbed his face between my hands. I found myself just staring at him, studying him. I knew his face, every inch of it. His expressions, his moods. His eyes gave away so much. Like when he was feeling happy or mischievous, the blue in his eyes would almost twinkle, like moonlight shining off a surface of water. Or, if he were angry or upset, they’d go dark like a storm. And his smiles. From the unsure one he was wearing now, to the little smiles, lopsided grins, or full-blown melt-your-heart smiles.

  There were so many things to say but I couldn’t focus on which to start with. After a minute, I let out a breath. “This was…the absolutely sweetest, kindest, best present ever. And I said that before, and I meant it then, too, but I mean it more now.”

  “You’re sure it’s okay?”

  I shook my head, bewildered by…just him. “It’s perfect. You, Lincoln Stone, are perfect.”

  “Hardly.”

  “You are. Not in the sickly kind of perfect. But…perfectly flawed perfect. You always
know everything. You think you don’t, but you read me like a book. The good, the bad, the everything in between that doesn’t always make sense. You always just know, without having to know anything. Because that’s just who you are.” I pulled his head down so I could lay my forehead against his. “I—”

  He stepped back, took my hands in his, then just looked down at me. “What?”

  Just say it! Three words. They’re easy. Simple.

  “I…hell. I have something to say, and you’re probably not going to like it, but you’re just gonna have to deal with that.”

  “You’re rambling.”

  “Deal with that, too.” I let out a deep breath. I can do this. It’s easy. Really. And if he laughs…then I’ll just kick him.

  “Jade. Whatever’s on your mind, you’re over thinking it. You look like you’re about to be sick.” He took a step back, eyes narrowing. “Or maybe like you’re trying to hulk out on me—”

  “I love you,” I said, cutting him off and rushing the words together until it sounded like a weird, deformed sneeze. I managed to look him in the eye as I said it, but as soon as the words left my mouth, I lowered my gaze to my feet.

  He didn’t have to feel the same way I did. Logically, I knew that and accepted it. Or I tried to. But if he laughed or gave me some awkward silence thing, or worse, a look of pity, I probably would be sick on him. Or hulk out—minus the whole green thing. Green just wasn’t my color.

  And now you’re rambling to yourself. Shut up, you idiot.

  It seemed like hours went by, though I knew it was probably more like two seconds before he responded. “I see.”

  I expected to feel hurt by his answer, but instead it just pissed me off. “That’s it? You see?” I shoved him. “You don’t have to say the words back or anything, but I see? Really?”

  “Hell, Jade. Give me a second here.”

  My stomach sank. “Oh, forget it. I’m going to my room,” I snapped, heading for the door.

  “You’re in your room.”

  That made me pause. Damnit! “Fine. Then I’ll go to your room and you and your stupid logic can stay here. Give me your ID card.”

  It was quiet, but I heard his chuckle as I pulled the door open. My eyes narrowed and I slammed the door shut again. I rounded on him, stomped the three feet it took me to get to him, then jabbed my finger against his chest. “You’re a jerk! A big, stupid, logic-using jerk!” I shouted the last word for emphasis.

  “Jade…”

  “Don’t.” I shoved him again. This time he fell back on my bed. “I don’t know why I like you.”

  He pushed up so he was resting on his elbows and shot me a cocky grin. “You don’t. You love me. You just said so.”

  I crossed my arms over my chest. Why was he allowed to look cute still? And why did his stupid grins still make my heart flutter? “Obviously I have brain damage. I’m pleading temporary insanity.” Though if I had to guess, I’d say it was more permanent. Damn him.

  “You don’t have brain damage, and you can’t plead temporary insanity.” He sighed. “Look, I just needed a second to think. You dropped some big words on me.”

  “They’re small words. All of them four letters or less. It doesn’t take a second to think about it. Either you say the words back or you don’t. Either you feel them or you don’t. You don’t. Fine. But don’t laugh at me, you…you big oaf!”

  One of his eyebrows rose. “Oaf?”

  “Yes. Oaf. I’m not exactly sure what it is, but that’s what you are.” The sides of his lips started to wobble, like he was trying not to laugh or smile. “And if you laugh at me again, so help me, I’ll punch you, Lincoln…whatever your middle name is…Stone.”

  “Nathaniel.”

  “What?”

  “My middle name. Nathaniel.”

  “Huh. I never would’ve guessed that.” Frowning, I shook a finger at him accusingly. “Don’t try to sidetrack me. We’re fighting.”

  He arched that same stupid brow. “Oh, is that what we’re doing?”

  The amusement in his tone was clear, which only made me madder. “No. You’re right. We’re not fighting. Because I’m leaving.”

  “We already went over this. You can’t leave. It’s your room.”

  “Yes, and you made it clear you’re not leaving, so I have to. Now just give me your damn ID card so I can get into your room.”

  Slowly, and wearing a smile, he shook his head. His tone held laughter when he said, “You’re incredible.”

  “Don’t be condescending!” This wasn’t how I pictured things going. At all. I was sure he wouldn’t say the words back. I knew he had feelings for me—that much I was sure about—but I still hadn’t expected the words. I’d figured he’d just stare at me blankly, like he was trying to interpret what I was saying or…something else. Not this laughing, grinning idiot who was standing in front of me.

  How had I, only moments before I’d been the idiot and said those stupid words, called him perfectly flawed? What in the world was wrong with me? Granted, I hadn’t dated much. Or at all. But weren’t girls supposed to have instincts about this kind of thing? Like, you don’t say the L word without…something. Backup, maybe?

  Hell. I would’ve talked to Tasha about it, but the feeling kinda just hit me out of nowhere. Okay, so it hadn’t really hit out of nowhere. It’d been more of a slow build, like putting a puzzle together piece by piece. I hadn’t realized what I’d been feeling until I’d seen the whole picture.

  I spun away from him and my gaze landed a foot above the dresser, where pictures of him and my parents still flashed by. I sighed. And with that breath, my anger deflated, leaving me tired and weary and feeling more foolish than I ever had before. I wanted to laugh and cry and…that was pretty much it. Just laugh and cry. Those were my top choices.

  I didn’t hear him move, but I felt Linc’s arms go around my waist. My eyes heated, but I fought off the tears. “Just go,” I said quietly, closing my eyes.

  “I’m not going anywhere.” He turned me around to face him. “Jade—”

  “Look, just forget I said anything. I didn’t mean to put you on the spot. It’s not like we’ve been together all that long. We haven’t even been couple-y for more than a few months. Everything just hit me weird. It’s my birthday, and you got me a cool present, after stealing it,” I added wryly. “I’m just emotional or something. Saying—” I broke off, unable to mutter those stupid words again. “Saying that wasn’t planned. No harm, no foul. Let’s just rewind the last twenty minutes and forget it happened.” Though I’d likely never forget it happened. One didn’t forget—if they were smart—their stupider moments in life.

  “Jade—”

  “Seriously. It’s all good.” I plastered a smile on my face. “Let’s just—”

  This time, it was Linc who cut me off. But not with any words. He leaned forward and planted a kiss on my lips that, effectively, had me shutting up and my brain going to fuzz. “Shut up for two seconds, would you?” His head shook. “You are incredible. You’re strong and spazzy, which is apparently pretty hot. I love you, too, you spaz.”

  “You can’t say you love me and call me a spaz.”

  “Why not? You called me an oaf. And an idiot. More than once, I think.” He grinned and one of his shoulders rose and fell in a partial shrug. “The fact is, I wasn’t thinking about my response. And I wasn’t laughing at you. I was laughing because it was funny. I mean, not funny in the way you’re thinking. Funny because Tasha saw it long before we did. She said neither of us would say the words for at least another month or two. She figured you’d say it before me, mostly because you have a habit of thinking things out loud. I figured it’d be me, since I’d been thinking about it a while, so I, ah, bet against her.”

  I wasn’t sure which shocked me more—the fact that Linc said the previously mentioned stupid words, or that him and Tasha had bet on it. My eyes narrowed and I let out a mostly exaggerated sniffle as I crossed my arms over my chest. “What’d you
bet?”

  Linc groaned. “To train with her one weekend a month and not complain if—when, rather—she gives me a black eye.”

  “You should know better than to bet against me.”

  He pulled me close. “Never again, especially with Tasha.”

  “Good. Jerk.”

  “So…”

  “’So’ what?”

  “Still love me?” When I didn’t answer immediately, he tugged on my hair lightly. “Well?”

  I rolled my eyes. “My temporary insanity seems to be sticking.”

  He cupped my face in his hands gently and gave me a sweet, slow kiss. “Happy Birthday, Jade.”

  “Thanks,” I said, then I bit my lip.

  “That’s your thinking face.”

  “Did you mean it?”

  “When I said I love you?” When I nodded, he kissed my forehead. “Yeah, I meant it. I love you, Jade Skylar Hall.”

  The words made me feel lighter, like I was floating on air. The warm feeling I felt before had multiplied by a hundred. I love you, Jade Skylar Hall. I loved those words. I loved the sound of them, of hearing my name— “How’d you know my full name?” I said, gaping at him. “I don’t tell anyone my middle name. Ever!”

  He scratched his head. “I, ah, might’ve asked the director about it. I said I needed it for your gift.”

  “You lied.”

  “Nope. Go look.”

  I walked over to the holo-disc and picked it up. The only thing I saw written on it was ‘Happy 17th Birthday’.

  “Turn it over,” he said.

  I did, then my heart melted all over again. Engraved on the bottom was a simple yet sweet message. I love you, Jade Skylar Hall. Thanks for making memories with me.

  “So, technically,” he started, “I didn’t lose the bet.”

  I set the holo-disc back down and twisted to face him. That cocky smile was back. In my chest, my heart thumped again. “But I said the words first, so really, you still did.”

  He looked hurt. “Are you using logic against me?”

  “Yes, yes I am.”

  He ran to me, lifted me off my feet, and swung me around in a dizzying circle. “Fair enough.”

  “Thanks, Linc,” I said quietly. “For waking me up at seven and for the photos, and just…everything. It’s been a great birthday.”