“I know,” Tessa reluctantly agreed. She’d often thought exactly what Seth was saying, but she’d loved Daniel’s family too much to ever imply that Andrew’s behavior was anything other than childish indiscretion. “But he never got in trouble after he turned eighteen. I don’t even think he’d had a parking ticket. His parents said that he’d finally grown into himself. They were so proud of him,” she whispered, not sure if she was speaking to Seth or to herself.
“I’m sure your husband was, too.”
She nodded, because she couldn’t speak past the lump in her throat. Had she blinded herself so much that she’d refused to see the signs? Had the rest of the family?
“Tessa, there’s no way you could have known what would happen. No one could have,” Seth said quietly.
“You told me that before, but how can I know that for sure? Maybe I wanted so badly to be part of Daniel’s family that I overlooked signs that could have saved lives.”
“What signs?” Seth prodded.
She’d wondered that hundreds of times in the years since the massacre. “Andrew always seemed a little reserved. He was never as open and easygoing as Daniel.”
“Plenty of people are reserved without being criminals.”
“I know, but maybe if I’d—”
“Don’t.” Seth tugged her into his arms. “It’s easy to look back and see what we think might have been there. That doesn’t mean it was there.”
“What if I’m looking back and seeing what was there? What if it all could have been prevented? What if—”
“What if you stop looking back, Tessa?”
Seth was staring at her, looking deep into her eyes. She saw so much in his gaze. So many things she thought she’d never see again.
His question hung in the air.
“I can’t. Not until this is over.” She stood, moving away from Seth and the promises she saw in his eyes.
“This will be over eventually. You know that, right?” He moved up beside her, close but not touching. She was acutely aware of him—every breath, every movement.
“It’s been going on for five years. Who’s to say that it won’t continue for another five?”
“Me. I’m not going to let the creep who’s after you continue the game he’s playing,” Seth retorted.
“You mean Andrew, right? That’s who you really think it is.”
“It would make sense. But, even if it’s not, we’re going to find the guy responsible, and we’re going to stop him.”
“You have a lot more confidence than I do.” She pulled back the curtain and looked out into the front yard. The police cruiser still sat at the curb. “Maybe I should just hide somewhere until the guy is caught. Just go away and pretend that I’m someone else. You could help me do that, Seth. I know you’ve probably helped dozens of people change their identities.”
Seth laughed, the sound rough and warm all at the same time. It sank into her heart and seemed to want to stay there.
“What’s so funny?” she snapped, irritated with her heart’s response, irritated with him because he just seemed so...perfect.
“I’m a personal security specialist, Tessa. Not a federal marshal. I protect people. I don’t help them disappear.”
“It’s not that funny.” But Tessa smiled.
“You should do that more often.” He traced the curve of her lips. “You’re breathtaking when you smile.”
She wanted to lean in, wanted to believe that he was everything she’d hoped and prayed for when she was a lonely teenager. Everything she needed to fill the emptiness that had been in her heart for too long.
“And you’re a temptation that I’m finding difficult to resist,” she replied with a sigh.
He smiled gently, his fingers lacing with hers. “Why should you?”
“Because I don’t want to lose everything again. I don’t think I could survive it this time.”
“God brought us into each other’s lives for a reason, Tessa. I don’t think it was so that we could walk out of them again.”
She wanted to tell him that God could have had dozens of reasons for bringing them together, but when she looked into his eyes, she could think only of how wonderful it would be if he were right. “I hope you’re right, Seth. I really do.”
“Don’t hope, honey. Believe,” he whispered against her hair. “Because when God is in it, everything works out just the way it should.”
As she stood in his arms and looked out into the dawning day, she began to believe that he was exactly right.
EIGHTEEN
“Three days stuck in this house is two days too many, Bentley,” Tessa griped as she dry mopped the floor for what felt like the hundredth time. When she was busy working, she didn’t worry about dust bunnies and dirty throw rugs. When she wasn’t, it was a different story.
She shook her head, lifting the throw rug from in front of the fireplace. Just standing there was enough to make her blush, the memory of Seth’s eyes, his lips, his sweet promises, making her want to pick up the phone and call him.
She didn’t want to be too needy, though. She didn’t want him to think she’d be one of the kind who always needed to know where her man was.
Her man?
“Is that what he is?” she asked the dog. He snuffled the rug and settled down next to the fireplace.
“You need to be a better conversationalist, Bentley.”
Bentley ignored her, and she carried the rug to the back door and hesitated. It was full light, nearly eight in the morning, and she couldn’t imagine danger lurking out in her backyard.
Just because she couldn’t imagine it didn’t mean it wasn’t there. Seth had warned her dozens of times over the past few days. Though Logan had been burning candles at both ends trying to find out if Andrew’s body had ever been properly identified, he hadn’t been successful. He hadn’t been able to find Anna, either, and he’d conceded that both could be dead, and that the person stalking Tessa could be someone unrelated to Kenya.
Tessa didn’t think he believed it, though, and she knew that Seth didn’t, either. Like the deputy sheriff, he’d dedicated most of the past three days to the investigation. Just like the sheriff’s department, he’d come up empty.
She frowned and dropped the throw rug on the floor near the back door. It could wait until... She wasn’t sure how long it would have to wait, how many more days or weeks she’d be cloistered in her house. Too many more, and she’d go stir crazy.
The phone rang, and she rushed to answer it, anxious for the distraction. “Hello?”
“Tessa? It’s Seth,” Seth said, as if he needed an introduction, as if she hadn’t recognized his voice the moment he’d said her name. Her hand tightened on the phone, and she sat in a kitchen chair, smiling because it was him and just talking to him made her feel happier.
“What’s up? It’s a little early for a phone call, isn’t it?”
“Were you sleeping?”
“I was up before dawn. I was just thinking about taking a nap.”
“I’d think you were more likely to be cleaning something. The floors, maybe?”
“How did you know?” She laughed, her cheeks heating as his warm chuckle drifted across the line.
“My keen powers of deduction and the fact that I’m parked outside and could see you through the front window.”
“How long have you been out there?” she asked, moving to the living room window, her heart leaping as she saw Seth’s truck parked behind the police cruiser.
“Just long enough to see you put down the broom and pick up the throw rug.” He got out of the car, his hair gleaming in the morning sunlight. He looked good. So good, she almost opened the door and ran into his arms. “You weren’t planning to bring the rug out back, were you?” he continued, his words pulli
ng her away from her thoughts.
“I considered it.” She opened the front door, still holding the phone to her ear, her heart beating wildly as Seth made his way up the porch stairs.
There was just something about him.
Something that made every nerve respond, every thought spin back toward him.
“Think we can hang up now?” He held up the phone and smiled.
“It makes more sense than talking on the phone while we’re standing next to each other,” Tessa replied.
“You know what makes even more sense?” He took both her hands, urging her backward into the house. “This.”
One kiss, and she was lost, the past gone. Just her and Seth and nothing to worry about but the next breath they’d take, the next moment they’d share.
Seth broke away. “You’d better go get dressed. It’s going to be a busy day.” He leaned down to scratch Bentley’s head.
“I am dressed.” Maybe not all that well, but her worn jeans and faded sweater had seemed perfect for cleaning the house. Of course, if she’d known Seth was coming for an early morning visit, she’d have chosen jeans that fit a little better and a shirt she’d had for less than four years.
“I think you’ve forgotten what day it is,” he chided, tugging at a sapphire-blue tie that he’d paired with a striped shirt.
“I guess I have.”
“Sunday, Tessa.” He hooked a strand of her hair behind her ear. “I thought we’d go to church together. Get some lunch afterward. Then we need to head over to the sheriff’s department. Logan finally heard from the police in Kenya.”
Tessa stiffened at his words, and Seth wished he’d waited to tell her. She’d been on edge the past few days, and the dark circles under her eyes spoke of sleepless nights and too much worry.
“What did they say?” she asked, her tone as stiff as her muscles.
“Not much. They faxed him their report, and he wants to go over it with us. He would have called you but I checked in with him this morning, and he asked me to give you the message. He’ll come here if you want him to.”
“I...don’t know if I can talk about the details of what happened. It’s been five years, but it seems like yesterday.” She dropped onto the couch, her shoulders slumped, her face pale and drawn.
“You’re way stronger than you give yourself credit for, Tessa.” He didn’t sit, because if he did, he’d reach for her. And once she was in his arms, everything that he wanted to say—everything that she needed to say—would be lost.
“You give me a lot more credit than you should.” She sighed and stood. “But you’re right. I can’t avoid it, and I do need to go to church. And eat.”
“And spend time with a good looking ex-soldier?” He was rewarded with a half smile.
“That, too. Give me twenty minutes.” She headed up the stairs looking exhausted, and he almost felt bad for interrupting her quiet morning.
The fact was, he hadn’t slept much lately, either. He’d spent most of the past few nights digging into Andrew Camry’s past, calling his old friends and enemies, reading a few newspaper articles that had been written before the mission trip. There was no record of Andrew’s crimes, but people who’d known him when he was a kid had been willing to talk. The stories they’d told weren’t good ones. He’d been a bully, a thief and a liar. Most people believed that had changed in the years before he went to Kenya, but a few insisted that Andrew had been a bad apple. Rotten to the core, one had said.
It was hard to know the truth of the matter.
Especially with Andrew dead.
Or not.
Kenyan police and the U.S. consulate had spent two years searching for his body. Eventually, they’d been led to a partial skeleton buried near the village Andrew had been taken from. But no one could say for sure whether the bones had been Andrew’s—no DNA testing had been done, because aside from Tessa, there’d been no family to claim the body, no one who cared enough to find out for sure whether or not the bones belonged to him.
“I’m ready,” Tessa called from the top of the steps, and Seth looked up, his pulse racing as she walked toward him.
She was beautiful, her hair straight and silky, swinging around her shoulders. She’d traded her jeans and sweater for a long-sleeved gray dress that complemented her slender figure. He’d never seen her in makeup but she wore subtle hints of it now, accenting her lovely features.
“You’re stunning,” he breathed, taking her hand as she stepped off the last step.
“You’re not so bad yourself,” she responded, the color in her cheeks deepening.
He kissed her gently, his hand still curved around hers.
He’d met and fallen in love with Julia when he was a kid, and he hadn’t fallen in love with anyone since then. He hadn’t intended to have that kind of relationship with anyone else—he’d only wanted the kind of light and easy bond that didn’t hurt when it was broken.
But he’d stumbled into Tessa’s life, fallen into the green depths of her eyes. He wouldn’t change that even if he could.
“I guess we’d better get out of here.” She pulled back, her lips deep pink from his kiss, her cheeks flushed. “We don’t want to be late for church.”
“True, but I wouldn’t mind spending a little more time here with you,” he murmured as he helped her into her coat and started buttoning it.
She brushed his hands away. “I’m not a child, Seth.”
“Trust me, I’m very aware of that,” he responded dryly.
Her blush deepened and she turned away, tugging the thick fall of her hair from her collar. “What do you think Logan wants to discuss? Just the report? Or do you think he found something in it?”
“He didn’t say.” He opened the front door, letting cold fall air into the foyer. He’d grown up where the weather was still mild in November, but in Washington, winter seemed to take hold before October ended, the air growing cold, the sky gray.
“You asked, though, didn’t you?” She edged in close.
“I asked. He said he wanted to discuss it with you. I told him we’d be in to speak to him after church.” Logan hadn’t been happy about that, but Seth hadn’t cared. Fear and tension were taking their toll on Tessa, and she needed a break from the stress.
“We could go now,” she said, apparently as eager for the meeting as Logan.
“You need a break, Tess. Some time away from the house and away from the investigation. At least, I thought you did. If I was wrong—”
“You weren’t,” she admitted, offering him a small smile. “A few hours not focusing on my troubles would be...nice.”
“Let’s get to it, then.” He glanced at the officer who sat in a cruiser at the curb in front of Tessa’s house. The guy nodded and gave a quick salute. Up the street, another cruiser sat, engine running, exhaust puffing out. Everything looked clear, the morning quiet and still, but Seth hesitated, a warning whispering at the back of his mind.
“What’s wrong?” Tessa whispered, her arm pressed against his, her muscles taut.
“Probably nothing,” he responded, shifting so that he completely blocked her view of the street.
“Then why are you trying to keep me from seeing what’s outside?”
“Just being cautious.”
And paranoid? Seth wanted to think that lack of sleep was making him imagine threats where there weren’t any, but he’d spent most of his life listening to his gut. “Tell you what. Go sit down in the living room. I want to check the perimeter of the house before we head out.”
“You think someone is out there,” she accused.
He couldn’t deny it, so he walked her to the couch, gave her a gentle nudge. “Sit here. I’ll be back in a minute.”
“I thought we agreed that neither of us were good at taking orders,” she muttered,
but she sat.
Good.
He wanted to check things out, and he didn’t want to be worrying about Tessa while he did it.
“When it comes to you, I’m not all that fond of giving them, but I want you safe, so stay put.” He tossed the warning over his shoulder as he walked outside.
Bright sunlight gleamed off the roof of the patrol car as Seth approached it. The officer rolled down the window, eying him through dark sunglasses. “Everything okay?”
“I came out to ask you the same thing.”
“It’s been quiet since I got here at seven. The guy I replaced said the same thing.” The officer pushed his sunglasses up and frowned. “Why? Did you hear or see something?”
“No.” Seth scanned the road. “But it isn’t what I can hear and see that has me worried.”
“Like I said, it’s been quiet as a tomb out here. If anything changes, I’ll let you know.”
“We’re planning to head to church. You want to follow?” An extra set of eyes and an extra weapon were always good, and Seth had never been above asking for help when he thought he might need it.
“Sure.” The officer pushed his glasses back into place and rolled up the window. Nothing changed. No sudden movement from across the street. No crackle of underbrush near the edge of the yard. No more reason to be on guard than Seth had had before, but he felt even more on edge as he searched the perimeter of the property.
Nothing.
He stared at the hill behind the house, searching the thick trees for any sign that someone was there. Movement, a shift in branches, something.
The hill was as quiet and still as the morning. Too quiet and too still in Seth’s opinion, but he had nothing to pin the thought on.
He walked back to the house, pausing on the porch and scanning the front yard again.
“See anything?” Tessa asked through the door.
He turned. She’d cracked the door open and was looking out at him. “No.”
“So,” she said as she opened the door, “I guess we can leave.”
“Right.”
Defender for Hire Page 16