Tumult

by Lea Hart

  “Well, if you’re lucky, you may find out someday if you’re so inclined.”

  Not knowing what the right response would be, he decided to drink his coffee and keep his thoughts to himself. Not that anyone in the Barnes family was thinking of him as an option for their daughter. As far as they were concerned, he was merely the man who was going to keep her safe and nothing more.

  And that was fine with him because he had no plans to get married and have a family anytime soon, even with someone like Audrey. Drinking his coffee, he wondered what Audrey might be interested in.

  If she was interested in a long-term relationship, it probably wasn’t going to happen with him and when he thought of her with someone else, a surprising pain sliced into his gut.

  Not knowing what to do with the unfamiliar feelings, he decided to ignore them. Now wasn’t the time to ponder the big what-ifs, and when and if it became necessary, he’d do it then.

  Nathan stood and refilled his cup and then returned. “Audrey told us that the company you work for has assets in-country and that’s why she chose to go with you. What can you tell me about how those people are going to help when the shit hits the fan?”

  “Titan has two groups working in the area. The first group of men is in al-Tanf, which is close to the Jordanian and Syrian border. They, along with British and American Special Forces, are training Syrian rebel soldiers who are fighting ISIS. There’s a second group working as advisors and they’re at the al-Monbath hill in the countryside of Tell Abyad, which is a Kurdish-held region north of Raqqa.”

  “Why is the government using Private Military Contractors in addition to the men they already have serving in the military?”

  “Because we’re an efficient privatized solution to an old-fashioned problem of having too few resources. The government can allow their highly trained and valuable Spec Ops men to go out and run direct action missions while placing qualified individuals in jobs less critical to the overall goal, but no less valuable.”

  “Makes sense, considering we’ve been doing it since the American Revolution and then in World War II with the Flying Tigers. But how does it work in modern times?”

  “Sometimes perfectly and as we’re all aware, sometimes disastrously. The crucible of events that created the industry is post-invasion Iraq and we saw how PMC’s helped the rebuilding project and also harmed it. It’s my opinion that the companies that survived that era have evolved and are an important part of the new world landscape.”

  “In what way?”

  “Once you’ve made something available, you can’t take it back because it doesn’t fit society’s proper version of itself. There are too many places in the world that are in need of a private brigade of soldiers who can offer relief with teeth. Not to mention the UN Peacekeepers who are critically in need of augmentation.”

  “And why did you decide to join Titan?”

  “My former CO, Rear Admiral Foster is running the shop in San Diego and when he asked me to come over and work with him, it was a no-brainer. He’s one of the best people I’ve ever worked under and to continue to do so is my privilege.”

  “Last question and then I’ll let you enjoy your coffee.” Running his hand over his face, he studied Carrick. “Can you talk my daughter out of this trip?”

  “Wish I could, but she’s dead set on going and tried to fire me a bunch of times if I didn’t go along with her program.”

  “Sounds like her.” Lifting his cup, he said, “Good luck to you not only surviving ISIS but also my daughter.”

  Tapping his cup against Nathan’s, he grinned and knew both were going to present a ton of challenges. “Thank you, I’m going to need it.”

  ***

  “Admit it,” Audrey said as she put the tray on the picnic table. “This was a good idea.”

  “Completely worth the detour,” Carrick replied as he gave her a grin. “Can’t leave Maine without having lobster rolls.”

  “Not only are we enjoying the beautiful views of Fort Williams Park, but we’re about to enjoy the best lobster roll you’ll ever have,” she said as she unloaded the tray. “Cape Elizabeth is perfect this time of year.”

  He watched her unload the tray and grinned. “What did you get me?”

  “I decided to go with the classic for you and mine has chipotle mayo and it’s divine.” She placed the chips, red-potato salad, and corn, cucumber, and blueberry salad down and then handed him their sodas. “Bite into Maine has the best food trucks in the state and I heard they’re adding a couple of storefronts.”

  “Can’t beat the view.”

  Looking across the lawn, she admired the lighthouse that sat on the edge of the park and the ocean beyond it. It was a brisk fifty-nine degrees and the sun was shining and, as far as she was concerned, this was a perfect day.

  Silently tucking the picture away in her heart, she took a deep breath and opened her eyes to see Carrick staring at her. “What?”

  “This isn’t your last lobster roll, Audrey.”

  “I know, why would you say that?”

  “Because I’ve watched you drink everything in for the last twenty-four hours like it was your last chance. I know you’re collecting these memories just in case, and I want you to know you’re in good hands.”

  Twisting the cap off her soda, she blew a raspberry. “Nothing like that entered my mind.”

  “You’re a lousy liar.”

  “Eat your lobster roll and tell me how amazing it is.”

  Lifting his up, he took a big bite and nodded.

  “Told you.” She did the same and moaned. Karl and Sarah Hutton were masters. The big sweet pieces of lobster mixed with the spicy mayo were perfection. Closing her eyes, she listened to the sound of the gulls, felt the ocean breeze brush across her face, and enjoyed one of her favorite things in the world.

  Whatever happened after this was going to be okay.

  One way or another.

  When she felt Carrick drop a kiss on her cheek, her eyes flew open. “Why did you do that?”

  “Because you’re the prettiest woman I’ve ever seen, and I admire the hell out the way you take on life and roll around in it. You’re open and happy and don’t take anything for granted.”

  Setting her sandwich down, she wiped her hands and then her face. “My goodness, Carrick, that’s so kind. Thank you.” Leaning over, she kissed his roughened cheek and put her hand on his leg. “But don’t think your sweet words are going to get me to share my whoopie pie with you.”

  “Had no illusions, babe.”

  “Smart man.” She lifted her roll and started eating again.

  “I like your family, Audrey, and I enjoyed getting to know them.”

  “My dad told me you two had a nice chat this morning, but he didn’t tell me what it was about.”

  “He just asked me about Titan and why I decided to work for them. Nothing earth-shattering.”

  Handing him the bowl of potato salad, she watched him take a bite. “My mom told me she feels a lot more comfortable about the trip since she had the chance to meet you, and I appreciate you coming. I’m sure it’s not part of the regular guard-dog duty and it was nice of you to make the effort.”

  “Nothing about what’s happening is regular. I’ve never kissed anyone at work and then told them to get in my bed, so I think it’s safe to assume we’ll be operating off the reservation from here on out.”

  “Seems so,” she replied as she ate some of the corn salad. Giving him a faint smile, she looked back out to the ocean and watched the whitecaps. “Is having sex going to screw the trip up and make things more difficult?”

  Choking on his drink, he coughed a couple of times. “Geez, Audrey, warn me next time you’re going to talk about sex.”

  She patted his back and raised her chin. “Are you going to be weird about us having a fling and working together?”

  “Wasn’t planning on it,” he replied dryly.

  “Good. Because I think two adults enjoying a physic
al relationship with no expectations of anything long-term is healthy. I don’t want to mislead you to believe that I want more than hot monkey sex. I think it’ll be a great way to relieve the stress were about to be under and also channel the inevitable adrenaline of being in danger. I heard that soldiers often get a hard-on after coming away from a gunfight, so if that’s true for you, I may want to take advantage of it when it happens.”

  Taking the bowl of potato salad back, she started to eat and then noticed Carrick hadn’t said anything. Glancing over, she saw he was slack-jawed and had a blank expression. “You okay?”

  “Sure, why not?” he said quietly.

  Shrugging, she went back to her potato salad and thought about getting a second roll. They were so good that she might just indulge. “Will you share a second roll if I get one?”

  “To be clear, you see me as a fling and nothing more.”

  “Is that a yes I’ll share a roll or no I won’t?”

  “Answer the damn question, Audrey.”

  “Yes, Carrick, I see whatever happens lasting no longer than the duration of the trip.”

  “Why?”

  “Because, we live on opposite coasts, have little in common, and don’t share the same long-term goals.” Draining her soda, she got up and patted his shoulder. “I’m going to get another roll.”

  Walking toward the truck, she felt his unhappiness follow her and wondered why her offer of monkey sex didn’t make him happier. Maybe he wasn’t all that interested after all and it was only the chase that had been interesting.

  Whatever…it wasn’t anything she was going to worry about.

  CHAPTER ELEVEN

  Sunday Night

  Carrick watched Audrey repack the things she’d brought from Maine in her duffle as she listened to something on her headphones. Must be nice to be so free and easy after dropping a damn bomb.

  Her little speech earlier had been nothing less and he wasn’t going to pretend otherwise. All her talk about easing tension and adrenaline was complete bullshit. Women didn’t operate the same way as men and he knew there had to be something behind her free and carefree attitude.

  Maybe she really did want something beyond the physical and she thought pretending like she didn’t would accomplish that goal. Except she wasn’t a dishonest person. He knew that from the moment he met her. She laid out her truth and let you handle it from there.

  Okay, so her speech was the truth…what did that mean?

  Great news to start with.

  He had no desire to get tied down and Audrey didn’t either. Which meant they had synchronicity about long-term goals after all. And, yes, they were not geographically desirable to one another and he didn’t see either of them investing in a long-distance relationship.

  Shit like that never worked and just ended up being long-drawn-out torture. And as far as having things in common—he had no idea if they did and neither did she. Just because they didn’t share the same views about everything only indicated they were intelligent adults and not morons.

  For all they knew, their worldview could mesh perfectly. Opposites often complemented one another and he and Audrey could be an excellent example of that.

  And that left him on the doorstep of the truth.

  One he had no desire to open.

  He hated the idea of being nothing more than a fling to her. Bit his ass and chapped his hide in ways he couldn’t describe.

  Was it because he’d always been the one to set the parameters with women and she’d stolen that from him?

  Possible.

  Leaning to the left slightly, he had a perfect view into the bedroom and saw her bend over to put something away.

  Torture.

  That’s what she was apparently doing.

  Except it wasn’t because if he wanted to, he could go in the room right now and take her any way he wanted. She’d said monkey sex was on the table, so as far as he was concerned, all bets were off. Unless his idea of what constituted monkey sex was a lot different than hers. Might be wise to find out before they went too crazy.

  And that left him back at the beginning of the maze. Could he have sex with a client during an assignment and still consider himself a professional?

  Probably not.

  But what if “the assignment” didn’t really begin until they crossed the border into Syria? Groaning, he knew the first rationalization was always the beginning of the end when it came to living by a moral code…or not.

  Closing his eyes, he decided he didn’t have to do a thing. If he didn’t, then she probably wouldn’t either. The ball had been left in his court, and as far as he was concerned, there it would stay.

  Congratulating himself on the easy solution, he felt satisfied that he’d come up with an answer. He picked up his tablet and began reading the latest updates from Syria. On the job and taking care of business, that was him.

  Temptation wasn’t going to be a problem.

  He had it handled.

  ***

  He was fucked.

  No way around it.

  Standing in the bedroom, he saw Audrey climb into bed in a tiny tank-top and a pair of pink bikini underwear. Her perfect ass was barely covered and he knew his ability to resist had just been decimated.

  “If you want to sleep on the couch, there are blankets and pillows in the closet next to the bathroom. Help yourself.”

  Pulling the sheet up, she then lifted her hair and put on her glasses.

  Seductress, no two ways about it.

  When she lifted her tablet and began to read, he knew it was a ploy. No way was she going to enjoy a book and then just go to bed. He was onto her and wasn’t going to let her get away with it. “I’m going to grab a shower.”

  Her hand went up and waved and that was the only response. “Two can play at that game,” he mumbled. He stripped off his clothes and kept one eye on her as he did and noticed she never looked up. Dropping them onto the chair in the corner, the sound of his buckle hitting the frame echoed in the room. Giving her a side-eye, he noticed she never moved a muscle.

  She was good, he’d give her that.

  Ambling out of the room slowly, his bare ass on display, he knew she wasn’t going to be able to stop herself from jumping him. And when she did, he would be a gentleman and accept her advances.

  They were in New York City and until they got on the plane tomorrow night, they were two adults merely sharing some free time together.

  Walking into the bathroom, he knew it was the flames of hell heating his ass for the lies he was telling himself, but he suddenly didn’t care.

  He was human and there was only so much he could take.

  Walking out of the bathroom, he saw that the bedroom was dark. He preferred the lights on but if she liked it that way, he could work with it. Untying the towel that was around his waist, he stepped into the room and waited a moment. Undoubtedly, now was the moment she’d make her move.

  When nothing happened, he hung the damp towel over the doorknob and stepped closer to the bed and heard an unbelievable sound. Something that shook his world.

  She was snoring.

  Audrey Barnes, offerer of monkey sex and flings, was asleep and sawing logs.

  Putting his hands on his hips, he looked around the darkened room and saw for the first time that the lights of the city were actually beautiful. She’d said something about it the other day and he thought she was crazy, but she wasn’t.

  Wandering over, he looked up and saw a sliver of moon and knew Audrey wasn’t going to be a fling. He didn’t know exactly what they were going to make, but it wasn’t going to be something they wanted to throw away.

  He climbed into bed and rolled next to her and did something he never thought possible.

  He spooned her and buried his face in her hair and was completely satisfied.

  Turns out, she seduced him after all.

  CHAPTER TWELVE

  Monday, October 16

  Not able to move her legs, Audrey wondere
d if a log had fallen over them. Wait, she was in bed and there were no trees in her room. Opening one eye, she looked down and saw Carrick’s big arm draped over her stomach and his legs tangled with hers.

  What happened to the sheets and blankets? And why wasn’t Carrick wearing any clothes?