“I love you.”
I felt something inside me shatter. My heart ached with physical pain. I pushed her away. I couldn’t do this. There was no way I could do this. Not so soon after Veronica. My heart was still ached from Veronica’s betrayal. I wasn’t ready. Everything that had happened to us lately….It wasn’t time.
Amber was too perfect, too important for me to ruin with all my emotional baggage. She meant everything to me as a secretary, a friend, and even a lover…
I couldn’t hurt her. I couldn’t ruin what we had.
She meant the world to me. She was all that I had.
And everything I ever wanted.
“No, I can’t do this. We can’t do this. Not now.” I raced from the dungeon to retrieve her clothes from the bedroom. “Please put these back on. I want you to stay the night, but not in my room. Take the guest room. Or I’ll take the guest room. I don’t want you leaving here tonight.”
Amber’s face went white as tears began to form in her eyes. She clutched her clothing shaking. “Ash, what did I do? I’m sorry if I did something. We were having fun. Was it because I said I—”
“No….I won’t hear of it anymore. We both just witnessed a tragic event tonight. You’re not yourself. If I allow this to continue, it would be irresponsible of me.” I grabbed a t-shirt and jeans pulling them on.
“No, I did…I meant it. I’ve cared for you for years now.” Amber slipped her dress over her head.
“Caring for someone doesn’t mean you love them. Believe me, this is for the best. Stay here tonight. I don’t want you driving back to the city this late.”
Amber stepped towards me. She brushed her hand across my unshaven cheek. “Ash, please. This feels so right. I’m ready to give everything to you. There’s nothing to hold us back. Veronica’s gone,” she whispered still holding her hand on my face.
I grabbed her wrist and tossed it down. “No, Amber, I can’t do this now. Please, you can take my room. I’m going to sleep in the guest room. Tomorrow we can talk. We can even take the day off work.” I pleaded with her to understand. This was too much. Everything that had happened today was an emotional overload for me.
Trembling like a leaf, Amber took several steps backward her face bright red. “How could you, Ash? I opened myself up to you. I put everything on the line for you! I just can’t…I can’t be here anymore.” Amber turned and ran from the room.
Without hesitation, I followed her. I found her in the main room slipping her boots on.
Grabbing her, I pulled her to the couch. “Don’t leave. It’s the middle of the night. It’s snowing outside. I want you to stay.”
Amber choked back her sobs. “No, you don’t. You want me to stay as your guest, as your friend. Despite what just happened tonight, I’m still just your faithful sidekick, a business partner. You’ll never see me as a lover or a girlfriend.”
My head was spinning. I shook my head vehemently. “That’s not true. Tonight is just not the time.”
“Oh, I guess I was good enough to go down on, huh? I guess though I can’t compete with the great Veronica. Ash, you know what your problem is? You’re an emotionally constipated little boy who can’t get over his mommy leaving him!”
I felt as though she’d kicked me in the balls. I ached all over. Rage then began to build inside me. How dare she use my mother against me? “Get out. Leave now, Amber, before you say something you can never take back.” I flexed my hands as I backed away from her. I had never been so upset with any woman before, not even Veronica.
“Oh, I will. But not before you face up to the fact that every woman you’ve been with has been exactly like your mother. They all cheat and they all end up leaving you. It’s almost as if you have some type of genetic predisposition to being abandoned.”
As soon as the words fell from her lips, I felt something between us collapse. I couldn’t look at her anymore.
Her face froze as if she knew she’d gone too far. “Ash, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean—”
“Leave this room. I’m going upstairs to my study. I’ll sleep in there. As soon as it’s light and it’s safe to do so, please leave.” I spun on my heel and stormed up the stairs. I threw myself in a chair in the study watching the fire glow in the fireplace.
Hearing the door open and then close, I lay back hoping that Amber was safe in my room.
Thirty Six
Amber
Wrapping my thin dress around me, I raced out the door down the elevator to my car. It was nearly 3:00 AM and the street was nearly deserted. Thankfully, I had my snow boots on as the snow had become quite deep in such a short amount of time.
But I’d forgotten my coat inside Ash’s apartment. I gazed up at the penthouse where he lived, but I just couldn’t bring myself to go back inside. My face was burning with cold as I unlocked my car and hopped inside. I shoved my keys in the ignition. With several sharp turns of my hand, I tried to get the car to start.
Nothing.
I turned the keys again and again. All that I heard was a ‘whir-whir’ noise as the engine attempted to turn over.
Shit, it must be my battery.
Slamming my hands down on the wheel, I felt the tears began to fill my eyes again. I just couldn’t keep doing this. Everything that had happened tonight. It was like I was living an actual nightmare. Ayden chasing us, tormenting us, and then crashing into the median to die a fiery death. Then Ash and I finally becoming close then…
Oh God, had I really professed my love for him? How could I have done that on tonight of all nights? My heart throbbed with pain as I recalled the terrible things I’d said to him. I banged my forehead on the steering wheel.
How could I have been so stupid? Of course, telling him I was in love with him was a horrible idea. He wasn’t ready to hear that from me or from anyone for that matter.
I sighed deeply. All those things I’d said about his mother and Veronica. If I could take it all back, I would immediately.
Looking up at Ash’s penthouse, I was filled with a longing to run up to him and beg his forgiveness. I wanted him to understand I hadn’t meant to hurt him.
But I did love him.
As hard as that had been to admit to myself, I knew it was true. He was more than just my boss and my friend. He was everything to me.
And I couldn’t risk losing him either.
Still, I couldn’t keep sitting out here in my car all night. The temperatures were well below freezing and without a coat, I was rapidly becoming very cold.
Maybe I should just call Ash. I turned to look for my phone in my purse in the passenger seat.
It was gone.
That was odd. I was sure I’d placed it there when I’d gotten into the car. Just then, an intense feeling of doom filled me. Chills went up my spine so much that I shivered.
Someone must be in the car with me!
Slowly, I reached for the door handle. Just as my fingers touched the cold metal, I felt a hand with a cloth in it clamped down over my face. A sweet odor filled my nostrils. Violently, I waved my arms around trying to hit whoever had me. I glanced up in the rearview mirror and caught a glimpse of his hazel eyes.
Ayden!
Thirty Seven
Ash
Rolling over on the couch in the study, I reached out to clutch the coat Amber had left behind. If she left, I’d expected she would come back for it seeing how it was so chilly outside. She must’ve still been in my room.
The light blue cashmere coat smelled of her perfume. Cradling it beneath my head, I thought of her. She was so soft, so warm and so beautiful. Was I an absolute idiot for pushing her away? She’d been right there in my dungeon so willing, so ready to play.
As much as I’d wanted to, I just couldn’t bring myself to do it. Amber was much too important to me to risk losing. I just wasn’t ready to allow myself to feel again after Veronica.
But God, how I wanted her.
Curling up to her coat, I fell asleep dreaming of her beautiful smile, h
er silky hair, and her submissive pose…
The next morning, traffic was miserable as usual on Fifth Avenue. After being stuck for nearly an hour, I made it into the office. As I exited the elevator, Becky, my new receptionist nearly barreled me over.
“Mr. Blackthorne! Mr. Blackthorne! You have to come here!” She waved her short, stubby arms around like a crazy woman.
“Becky, what is it? Where’s Amber?” Noticing her desk empty, I looked around.
“That’s just it, Mr. Blackthorne! She’s not here. No one has seen or heard from her since yesterday.” Becky panted in hysterics.
“Calm down, Becky. It’s only…” I glanced at my phone. It was after 10:00 AM. Shit, Amber was never this late! “She hasn’t called in at all?” I flipped through my phone checking my missed calls. Nothing.
Becky swallowed hard shaking her head.
“No, Mr. Blackthorne. She hasn’t called anyone. She’s always here in the office no later than—”
“—8:30, I know.” I bit my lip thinking about what might have happened. Perhaps she was still upset by my refusal of her last night.
I walked over to Amber’s desk and flipped on her PC. There was nothing on there. Nothing to indicate she’d been in or that she would be absent. In all the years she’d worked for me, she’d never done anything like this.
“Mr. Blackthorne? What’s going on?”
I waved my hand at her. “I’ll find her, Becky. I’m sure she’s fine. Please go back to work.”
Becky nodded as she waddled off to her desk.
Walking into my office, I flipped on my PC. I began to scroll through my voice messages.
Nothing.
As the minutes ticked by, an overwhelming sense of panic began to set in. Amber was never late. She must’ve been upset over what happened last night. Quickly, I dialed her number.
It went straight to voicemail. I dialed again and again with the same result.
Sighing heavily, I grabbed my suit jacket and threw it back on. This wasn’t like her. I drove across town.
After I arrived at Amber’s apartment, I opened it with the key she’d given me. The apartment was completely dark and silent. Walking around, I flipped a few lights on. Everything was still. Nothing appeared out of place.
My God, what if something had happened to her? My heart caught in my throat as I envisioned all the awful possibilities. Then a horrifying thought…
Ayden!
My phone vibrated as I glanced at it.
Unknown number.
“Hello?” I tentatively answered. I loathed telemarketers anticipating an annoying automated message.
“Ashton?”
“Yes?”
“Is this the Ashton Blackthorne? The son of Ashler Blackthorne?”
I sighed with irritation. “Yes. Who wants to know?”
“I do,” a raspy male voice replied.
“Who are you? I’m not interested in whatever you’ve got to offer.” I scratched my neck as I walked around her apartment.
“Oh, I think you are very interested in what I’ve got.”
“Look, buddy, I’m in the middle of something. I’m hanging up now.” Before I could click the hang up button, his voice changed.
“DON’T HANG UP, ASH! Not if you want to see her again.”
I froze holding the phone. My mouth went dry. “Ayden?” I whispered. God, I thought he was dead. I saw his car in flames. How could’ve he have survived that crash?
“For a smart guy, you’re really quite stupid. You didn’t get that until now? Tsk, tsk, Ashton. I expected better from Manhattan’s biggest and baddest shark.”
My stomach churned. It was my worst fear. “Is she okay, Ayden? Let me talk to Amber!” I demanded.
“Oh, Ash, calm down. She’s just fine. You know she was mine long before she was yours. Such a pretty little thing. Long legs, delicious tits, and a sweet, perfect pink pussy—”
“DON’T YOU LAY A FUCKING HAND ON HER!” I roared, smashing my fist against the wall.
His maniacal laughter lit up the other end. “Calm down there, Ash. I haven’t done a thing to her she didn’t want. Nooooo, I wouldn’t do that. She’s safe and sound right next to me. In fact, I can see her delicious tits pressing against her blouse her nipples sticking out. Isn’t she amazingly sexy, Ash? Have you tasted her sweet pussy? The way she wiggles when your tongue flicks her clit? Or when you slap her ass with a whip?”
His voice was so husky and deep it made my skin crawl. I could only imagine Amber’s terror. “Look, Ayden, I don’t know what you hope to accomplish by doing this. Amber ended things with you years ago. She’s not my girlfriend. She’s my business partner and my friend. That’s all. Please just let her go and I’m sure she won’t report this to the police. Just tell me where she is and I’ll come pick her up.” I hated trying to bargain with this deranged asshole, but Amber’s life was on the line.
I stood in the middle of Amber’s bedroom gazing at a black lace teddy lying on her bed. All I heard was silence on the other end that seemed to go on forever. “Ayden?” I spoke in a calm, but firm voice.
“Ashton? I’m still here. No, I don’t think I’m ready to finish the game yet. We’re just getting started.”
I sank down onto Amber’s soft bed. The whole room smelled of her sweet perfume. “I didn’t know we were playing a game, Ayden.”
“Of course we are, Ash. A game I like to call ‘Fuck You’.”
Rage began building inside me threatening to overtake me. I wanted to slam my fists into his face. “Why are you doing this, Ayden? Amber’s through with you.”
He laughed hysterically on the other end. “This isn’t about her, you fucking idiot. It’s about you and me.”
“Me? I just met you last night.”
“Oh, really, Ashton? I’m very close to you. You just never knew it.”
His voice turned dark and sinister. It made my skin crawl. My mind raced as I tried to place him in my memory. Business clients? A colleague? An old college buddy? A frat brother? Someone I had done wrong? There was nothing there. “I don’t recall knowing you, Ayden. If I’ve offended you in some way then that’s between us. Let Amber go.”
“Oh, Ashton, the fun is just starting! Now that I have your attention I’m not about to call it quits. As for Amber, you’ll just have to find me to get to her.”
Bile began to rise in my throat. I swallowed its bitterness reluctantly. “Let me talk to Amber, Ayden.”
There was a slight scuffling on the other end. Then I heard a female voice faintly at first.
“Ash! Help me, please!”
“Are you okay, Amber? Where are you? What did he do to you?” Frantic, I jumped up and paced the floor.
“I’m okay, Ash. But please help me!” Her voice was hoarse as if she’d been screaming.
My heart felt as though it would break.
Her voice was muffled as Ayden’s gruff voice came back, “All right, Ash. You know she’s alive at least for the moment. I will call you back with further instructions.”
“WHEN?” I demanded.
“Tonight. I told you, Ash, we’d be seeing each other again soon.”
“No, Ayden, wait! Please!”
The line went dead.
Throwing my phone down on the bed, I smashed my fists against the wall. Swearing as my knuckles crackled painfully, I blinked away my tears of frustration.
Where the hell was Amber? And what the hell was Ayden planning?
Thirty Eight
Amber
Trembling with fear, I opened my eyes. Heavy bits of grit fell from my lashes scratching my eyes. Blinking several times, I looked around to see where I was. My wrists throbbed from the tight bindings and my back ached as if I’d been tied to the chair for some time.
Ayden.
How was he alive? I’d seen his car smash into the concrete median. There was no way he could’ve survived.
I’d been coming out of Ash’s apartment getting into my car. I sensed someone
in the car with me when everything went black.
The room was dank and dark with the heavy musty odor of mold. Obviously, a basement, I looked to see tiny rectangle windows at the edge of the ceiling. With a sinking heart, I realized no one would see me in here.
Or hear me.
I heard heavy footsteps above me. Ayden was coming. The footsteps got closer and closer. I held my breath pulling against the restraints.
As he descended the wooden staircase, I watched as his shoes appeared. I held my breath bracing myself for the worst.
He stopped at the foot of the stairs to stare at me. He was as handsome as ever with his dark hair falling over one eye. He jerked his head back to clear a lock from his forehead. He was dressed casually in tight jeans and a long sleeve thermal shirt. He was more muscular than I’d remembered. He must’ve been working out a lot more.
As he walked toward me, I cringed dreading his touch.
His hands brushed my cheek lightly. “Hello, Amber.” His voice was husky and deep. His hair was longer than he’d normally worn it. Several locks fell into his eyes. His build was even more defined his muscles rippling beneath his tight shirt. The sleeves were pushed up so high so I could see the tattoo, ‘Forever Amber’ still emblazoned on his bicep.
“Ayden? What happened? Why did you bring me here?” My throat was so sore it was difficult to talk.
He knelt beside me to stroke my hair. “Princess, I brought you here because it was the only way to get his attention.”
“Whose attention?” My vision was blurry and I wondered if he’d hit me on the head as well.
“Ashton Blackthorne. You’re his little sub now, aren’t you?”
“Ash? No, not at all.”
“Come now, Princess. I know what a dirty little girl you are. I saw you coming out of his house in the middle of the night! I doubt you were working at 3:00 AM!”
“Nothing happened, Ayden! He’s my boss. And now he’s my business partner.”
Ayden threw back his head laughing. He leaned forward to caress my breasts.
My skin crawled at his touch.
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