Michal's Window

by Ayala, Rachelle

  “I’m a man of my word. I promised him a daughter.” He touched my cheek. “I should offer him another chance. Would you like to be the bait?”

  I blinked at the floor and twisted the side of my robe. My father could be laying a trap. Although David had wounded me, I wanted no part in harming him.

  Father traced my cheekbone with his rough finger. “Let me look at you.” His breath hot against my face, he asked, “How old are you?”

  “Sixteen.”

  He cradled my face with both hands. “She was sixteen. A goddess in a pool of water. Blue-green eyes.” His gaze blurred into a faraway look. “She was lively, impertinent, and never one to stop teasing. I can see her in you.”

  “Who was she?”

  “She left her heart in that river, the brook where…” His voice trailed, a solitary leaf fluttering into the past. He shut his eyes and furrowed his fingers down my face. “If I could see her again… Like a dream, so fleeting. Let me look in your eyes.”

  Sweat popped over my forehead. Who was father seeing in his vision? He had been tormented by spirits, and without David’s music, he could not sleep.

  I stepped back. “I’ll get Mother.”

  “No, not your mother.” He swallowed a draught of wine. “So, you think you’re ready for marriage? I had plans for you, my darling, to make peace with the Philistines. Their prince is two years younger than you. I had wanted to wait.”

  I had no wish to marry for peace, especially to a foreign idol worshipper. Merab had held out. No matter how many times she had been promised, at the end, Father allowed her to decide.

  He thumbed my cheek. “But alas, this David has to be dealt with. Perhaps there’s still a chance.”

  My heart jumped at the opportunity. I clutched my father’s sleeve. “I should like to marry David, if you’d permit.”

  He pushed me aside and pounded a fist on the oaken table. “If he thinks he’ll usurp my crown with my daughter’s body, he shall pay dearly.”

  My heartbeat jittered. “Didn’t he already pay with the head of Goliath?”

  “That was for Merab. And she cheated him. That girl always got her way.” He tapped his chin. “Yes, I will extract a heavy bride-price from him. One hundred freshly slaughtered Philistine foreskins.”

  Disgusting. I clapped my hand on my mouth. Why would he want such a price?

  My father chuckled through a slurred grin. “He has to do the task alone, and he has one year. But don’t worry, my doll, he won’t succeed.”

  I stared at him, unbelieving. I wanted David, but I wanted more for him to live.

  * * *

  One spring morning, about nine months later, my youngest brother, Ishbaal, shuffled to my side. “David is back with the bride price in a bloody bag.”

  My heart jumped like a playful kitten. “You’ve seen him? Where?”

  “He’s going to see Father.” He waved his hands and dragged his club foot. “Do you want to watch him count it?”

  I made a face and rushed to my dressing room. Thank God! David had survived, and he wanted me. But what would Father do? He had sent David into danger by asking for the bride price. Would he allow me to marry him? Or would he find some reason to thwart him?

  Trailing my hand through my gowns, I chose a shimmery silver-colored dress. A maid tucked my hair under a sequined headband. For jewelry, I donned a simple strand of pearls and shell earrings. After a dusting of jasmine powder, I wrapped myself in a jade-green shawl with a fluttery fringe and headed for Father’s audience chamber to hear the news.

  “Burn it,” my father ordered as he exited the chamber. He came toward me, followed by my mother. I froze. Father’s brows furrowed, and he shoved me against a wall. “Explain why he brought two hundred foreskins. Have you been playing the harlot?”

  “What do you mean?”

  “A double bride price is given for a defiled daughter.”

  I clenched my fists in front of my chest. “But I never saw him. How could he defile me?”

  Father glared at me, his dark hair pummeled in his eyes. “By bringing double, he’s telling the world he’s taken your virginity. Sly fox. He’s outmaneuvered me.”

  My knees shook, and I would have dropped to the ground if he hadn’t held me up. Mother placed a hand on his arm. “There’s nothing we can do about it now. Saul, let it go.”

  She pried Father’s fingers off me and led him away.

  I rubbed my shoulder and ran to the garden. Father resented the people when they cheered for David. And David behaved wisely and charmed all Father’s servants. Was I just a bartering chip in this dangerous rivalry? I slowed my pace and let the sweet, spicy scent of cut fennel calm my mind.

  David stood under the shade of an ancient olive tree. He looked different, stronger and sturdier. His hand poised over the large sword at his waist, he surveyed the courtyard like a lion regarding his pride.

  His wave was commanding and deliberate. I refused to run to him, to act like a lovesick girl. My heart knotted in remembrance of his last words, his only concern that he was properly rewarded by the king. I turned and glided toward the lily pond. A light breeze ruffled the leaves of the bay laurels, and the piquant fragrance of crushed leaves stiffened the hairs on the back of my head.

  Footsteps crunched on the gravel behind me.

  “Princess.” And there he was, the man who had hunted two hundred men to win the remaining daughter of Saul. My heart fluttered, contrary to my resolve, and when he offered his arm, I took it and walked with him around the pond. The warmth of his touch wet my lips, and I fought the urge to lean on him, to conform to his strength.

  “Are you happy to see me?” A smile lit his face, and his eyes seemed to dance.

  I picked a lily and twirled it in his face. “Shouldn’t you be disappointed?”

  His brows crinkled briefly, and he let go of my hand. “About what?”

  “I suppose you were disappointed to find my sister married.” I hid the lily behind my back.

  “No, I was worried you’d be married before I could earn the bride price.”

  The golden-brown eyes seemed sincere, but I couldn’t succumb so easily. I pouted and looked at him sideways. “I didn’t care whether you got it or not.”

  “You didn’t care if I was hurt or killed?”

  My lips trembled. I stared at the veins bulging between the knuckles of his strong, square hand. The thought of David injured had kept me up many nights. “I only prayed for you and wished you well.”

  His smile broadened, and he grabbed my hand. “So, you are happy to see me.”

  I flung the lily at him. “You assume too much.”

  The sides of his mouth dropped, and his shoulders slumped while he ran a hand through his ruddy locks. I turned toward the stand of myrtle trees near the back gate.

  A few footfalls later, he caught my shawl and swung me around. “Michal, I don’t understand. Am I not good enough for you?”

  I gasped and coughed to cover my surprise. He acted as if I had hurt him. I pushed him aside and hugged myself, fighting for composure.

  “Talk to me.” He touched my chin with the tip of his finger.

  “You didn’t want me.” My voice came out too small—girl-like. “You wanted my sister.”

  His mouth opened, and he shook his head. “No, your father said you refused.”

  A swell of pressure washed over my shoulders. “He never asked me.”

  David’s face hardened. “But why would your father lie about something like this?”

  I couldn’t tell him of my father’s hatred, or his suspicions that David would usurp his crown. I dared not believe he wanted me, or did he?

  David took my hand. “I doubled your bride price. It shows how much I value you.”

  “Oh, I bet.” I bit back a smile. “I don’t suppose it to be a fair trade. You’re going to have to offer something more than a putrid sack.”

  His eyes twinkled. “Come, let’s take a walk. I can see you’re still hesitan
t.”

  He offered me his arm, and I reluctantly took it. Was it me he valued? Or did he only wish to be son-in-law to the king?

  We walked out the back gate, circled a hillock and stepped over a meadow. Sheep grazed in peaceful clumps. The twitters of sparrows trilled through tangled leaves, and dragonflies flitted between the reeds that swayed alongside a glistening brook.

  He led me down the bank and turned me to face him. “Remember that night I found you? And you told me your price?”

  My cheeks heated, and I could not meet his eye. I wanted him so much, but the pain of rejection stung my heart.

  He twirled the ends of my hair. “I mean to deliver peace to Israel, not a bloody sack. But before I can do that, would my heart be enough?”

  “What are you saying?” My fingers tingled with feathery pulses.

  He kissed my forehead. “Michal, my heart for yours, is that a fair trade?”

  I raised my eyes. He stared at me so intently that my throat went dry. His honey-brown eyes beckoned an invitation to his soul.

  “But what if I do not please you?” I said.

  “I’ll always be pleased with you, no matter what happens. Do you believe me?”

  I yearned to believe, to trust, and to cast my fate to his. His embrace soothed me, and I needed his acceptance. Warmth crept over my shoulders where he held me, and my breathing steadied as I leaned against him.

  He caressed my face and kissed my cheek, his beard calming and reassuring. “You don’t have to answer me today. I’ll wait and stay as long as your father tolerates me.”

  He led me through the meadows and back to the palace. We climbed the steps to our spot on the wall behind the abandoned guard shack.

  Warblers flitted among the treetops, and clouds swirled in soft trailing wisps. High above, a pair of hawks glided in circles, their paths crossing, intersecting oh, so close, and then parting and coming around to almost touch again. David embraced me, his chest to my back, and pulled his cloak around my shoulders to shield me from the evening breeze.

  His arms felt safe and his heartbeat promised security. And even though I had cried many tears while he was gone, he now offered me his heart. I tilted my face. “I’ll answer you now.”

  He dropped slowly to one knee. “Michal, you’re everything I want in a wife. Will you marry me?”

  “Yes. Yes, David, I’ll marry you.” A smile sprang from my heart, and I bounced on my heels.

  “You will?” he asked, his voice excited like a young boy’s.

  I nodded again, and he bowed his head. “LORD God, I thank You this day for granting my heart’s desire to marry Michal. May we both abide in Your Laws and cleave to each other, by faith, as husband and wife. In Your name, LORD.”

  He swung me around, and we stared at each other, giggling.

  “I can’t wait another day,” he said. “Let’s skip the betrothal and go straight to the wedding before your father changes his mind.”

  “I’d love nothing better.”

  The troth promised and sealed, we kissed.

  * * *

  Decked in multiple layers of cloth, beads, and jewelry, I took my father’s arm and walked with him to the wedding pavilion. My heart leapt at my first glimpse of David through the threads of my bridal veil. He stood, erect as a prince, a bridegroom’s crown glinting over his thick red-brown hair. A blue and white prayer shawl wrapped his broad shoulders, and his luminous eyes tracked my path.

  At the canopy, he walked around me three times and lifted my veil, as was custom, to assure my identity. I licked my dry lips and stared at the fringes of his shawl, but couldn’t restrain the corners of my mouth from twitching. The sun beamed brighter, and the colors of his robe jumped sharply. His shallow breathing fanned my face, and I could almost hear his heart thump, or was it my own pulse? His hand trembled slightly as he clasped mine.

  Elihu, the priest, read the seven blessings describing God’s creation of the universe, of mankind, of Israel, and of husband and wife. He finished with the final blessing. “Blessed are You, LORD, who grants joy to David by giving him Michal as wife, a help meet for him.”

  David looked at the sky and said, “Blessed are You, LORD, our God, sovereign of the universe, who gave me life and blessed my path.”

  He dropped his gaze to mine. “Michal, I take you as my wife of the covenant; I take you uprightly according to the Law of Moses. You are forevermore consecrated unto me. Blessed are You, LORD, who mercifully grants that we may grow old together.”

  Warmth encircled my heart at his declaration. I belonged to him forever, my David.

  Elihu produced a scroll, the book of our marriage covenant. He offered the reed to David, who signed his name and passed it to me. Our marriage was officially sealed before God and witnesses. David and I faced the assembly to receive the blessings.

  Father spoke first, “Blessed are you, my children. May peace and harmony always be between you. Blessed be the LORD God, for His mercy endures forever.”

  David’s father, Jesse, approached us with his arms open. “Blessed are you, my son and my daughter, when you fear the LORD God. May you be content with the fruit of your labor, and may you be fruitful as a well-tended vine. Blessed be the LORD God, who shall preserve your steps from this time forth and forevermore.”

  Jonathan held our hands. “Blessed are you, my brother, David, and my sister, Michal. Today, may your heart and soul be knit as one. May you be joined on this day and forevermore. Blessed be the LORD God, may nothing pull you asunder.”

  As tears wet my eyes, musicians sang a hymn of praise and thanksgiving. Jonathan handed David a vase, and he smashed it on the ground to signal the end of the ceremony. The guests paraded to the banquet tables, and Mother let down the covers of the wedding canopy to leave us alone for the customary quarter of an hour.

  The fragrance of jasmine mixed with the heady scent of sandalwood emboldened me. I clasped my arms around David and squeezed him tightly, breathing my vows in his ears. “David, Ishi, I bestow myself to you today and always, to love only you, to pray for you, and to be a help meet for you.”

  “And likewise, I to you,” he said. “Isha, only you, my wife…”

  Our lips joined as husband and wife, and I kissed him, inhaling the joy of belonging and the security of desire. So enveloped was I in his presence, that it took me a few moments to feel my mother’s jabs in my back. I smoothed my dress and followed her to the wedding feast.

  We sat at a table laden with platters of fish in lemon sauce, herbed roast pheasants with garlic and leeks, lamb shanks cooked in cumin and cilantro, and an assortment of honey and date cakes. David enjoyed the food and insisted on feeding me each bite from his hand. How blessed to belong to a man, one so loving and solicitous, who cared for me and pledged his protection.

  My sister walked by, kissed me and whispered, “The man has quite an appetite—and large hands. Enjoy.”

  Chapter 6

  Isaiah 62:5 For as a young man marrieth a virgin, so shall thy sons marry thee: and as the bridegroom rejoiceth over the bride, so shall thy God rejoice over thee.

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  Late in the evening, my parents led us to the wedding tent for the consummation. Father lifted the flap, and David pulled me in with his fringed prayer shawl over my head. A stark white cloth spread over a bed covered with pillows and skins.

  “What happens now?” My voice trembled, and a sudden chill washed over me. Mother had warned me that the marriage night would be unpleasant, something to be endured through closed eyes, especially the staining of the virginity cloth.

  “Sit with me a bit.” He touched my elbow and gestured to the bed. After he uncrossed my arms, he removed my beaded headdress and bridal shawl. “With that out of the way, I can properly kiss you.”

  Tiny kisses encircled my lips, and he bathed me with his warm breath. His lips trailed over my mouth and down my neck to caress my breasts through the silk of my dress. Firm hands slipped the tinkling bracelets off my wrists an
d slowly untangled the layers of fabrics and beads adorning my wedding gown. Heat spread across my belly, and I pressed against his solid body. He lifted my dress and wedged one knee between my legs while touching me in places no one had ever handled. I held my breath. The sensations were too concentrated, too intense.

  He shifted his weight and gently unclasped my fists. “Did you think we would fight?”

  “Of course not.” I threaded my fingers between his.

  “There’s no rush.” He pulled me to a sitting position. His quickened breathing belied his calm words.

  My tongue stuck to the roof of my mouth. He held my hand and smiled, his honey-colored eyes twinkling. The hand he held became moist, and I swallowed several times to calm my fluttering heart. I had dreamed of this moment, waited in anticipation. But I wanted it to be perfect for him. And I was ruining it. I reached for a cloth to dab my face, afraid the kohl and rouge would smear.

  “It’s warm in here, isn’t it? Would you like to take a walk to cool off? Or shall we play a game?”

  “Game?” A giggle bubbled in my throat. He looked so eager, like a young boy out to play ball.

  “First to undress the other wins. I’m ahead because I’ve taken off your headdress and your shawl. Watch my quick hands.” He unhinged a heavy gold and carnelian collar and dropped it to the table.

  “Wait, wait.” I lifted the bridegroom’s crown off his head.

  “You catch on fast. Now, untie my sash.”

  I unknotted his sash with some difficulty and looped it around his neck, boldly reeling him in for a kiss.

  He lingered on the kiss before moving my hands to his shoulders. “Take my robe off. With your mouth.”

  I clutched at the silken groom’s robe between my teeth. It was a bit more difficult than I thought. I nibbled at the edges near his neck, and he squirmed to help me. But each time I tugged one side, the other side tightened.

  “It might help if you started lower,” he suggested with a sly smile.

  I moved my face to his chest. The robe already hung partially open, exposing the linen tunic he wore as an inner garment. His torrid male scent stirred my insides like drunken butterflies, and I lingered before pulling one side of the robe back. David slid his arm out and dropped the other side.