Nothing to Lose
Page 8
The aroma of fresh-baked bread filled her nostrils as she stepped into the bakery. She locked the door behind her and followed the appetising scent. Swallowing past the dry lump in her throat, she pushed open the saloon doors. She was thankful to see only one person in the room. ‘Heather.’ A breath of relief fell from her lips, and tears dripped down her cheeks. ‘I’ve done something very bad. Something terrible.’
Heather placed a tray of bread on the cooling rack and shook her hands free of the oven mitts. She ran her hands over Jessie’s arms. ‘Shh, there-there. Tell me what’s wrong, and we’ll figure a way to fix it.’
‘Travis and I, we … kissed. He asked me to be his … girlfriend.’ Travis’ sweet request had been music to Jessie’s ears. She thought for sure she’d burst at the seams with happiness.
‘I know.’ Heather wiped a tissue over Jessie’s cheeks.
‘How?’ The word came out as a sob.
‘I received a short message from Travis Saturday night. He said, You were right. I like Jessie a lot. Quite a lot. I’ll do something about it. Don’t call. You can say I told you so on Monday.’
Jessie wanted to giggle at Heather’s deep-throated impersonation of Travis, but couldn’t muster an ounce of cheer. ‘I’ve ruined everything.’ She slid onto a chair by the counter, slumping her shoulders. ‘I’m sorry. How rude of me. I came in here crying like a baby and forgot to ask how you and Mr Moretti got along.’
‘Angelo and I had a lovely time. We went for a walk along the waterfront yesterday and stopped for lunch at a cafe. We wouldn’t have reconnected if not for your presence in our lives.’ She tapped Jessie’s hand. ‘I’m more concerned about your crisis. Tell me what’s going on. We have the shop to ourselves.’
‘He’s going to hate me.’ Jessie wiped her eyes with the back of a hand.
Heather squinted. ‘Travis? He adores you?’ She grabbed a stool and sat next to Jessie.
Jessie inhaled a breath. ‘Years ago, when I left home, I didn’t just leave behind my parents. I left a boyfriend. I had a big chip on my shoulder, and I thought I could conquer the world. I didn’t care who I hurt in the process.’
‘What happened?’ Heather leaned an elbow on the counter, and gave an encouraging smile.
‘We met at a party and soon afterward we moved in together. I wasn’t ready for a relationship. An art director visited my class and showed interest in my sketches and me. He convinced me to accompany him to California. I thought I’d be a designing star.’ Her confession came out in one breath. Embarrassment clouded her thoughts at how quickly she had attached herself to this other man. ‘I packed up and left.’ Jessie inhaled. ‘The guy I left behind was Liam Parker.’
‘Oh, my.’ Heather placed a hand on her chest then scrunched her eyebrows. ‘You were young. Sometimes hearts are broken in the making of our choices. I know that more than anyone.’
‘But you did the right thing before walking away. You talked to Mr Moretti. You cared. I ran.’ Jessie rested her face in her hands. ‘I didn’t know of Travis’ connection to Liam.’ Frustration chilled her bones. ‘Had I known, I would never have stepped foot in the bakery. He didn’t mention Liam by name. He referred to him as his buddy.’ She sighed. ‘Last night, Travis asked me to be his guest at the wedding. He said he couldn’t wait for me to meet Liam and Carla. I thought the name a coincidence until Travis said Liam had been a teacher.’ Jessie swiped a tear before it fell.
‘Why didn’t you tell Travis this last night?’
Jessie shook her head, remembering how stunned she’d felt. ‘The words wouldn’t come. Hearing Liam’s name threw me for a loop. I froze. I’m terrible at confrontations.’ The throb at her temple returned. ‘I didn’t love Liam, and I think the lack of emotion was mutual, but I should have told him face-to-face.’ She glanced at Heather. ‘I’m afraid Travis will assume I’ll run as I did in the past. He’s put his trust in me. I don’t want to lose—’
A click sounded then the jingle above the front door.
‘Mom!’
Jessie jumped off her chair. ‘Travis,’ she whispered, staring wide-eyed at the saloon doors.
‘Liam and I picked up the tuxes. His waistline has room for one of your cinnamon buns. Is Jessie here?’
An ice-cold chill ran from head to toe. She had to talk to Travis, but not in front of Liam.
‘Go.’ Heather pointed to the back door. ‘I’ll tell Travis you’re running late.’
She squinted at the other woman. ‘You’d do that?’
‘Who am I to judge? I once left everything behind to seek adventure, too.’
Jessie wanted to hug Heather, but there wasn’t time. She ran to the door.
Footsteps neared the kitchen.
‘Go.’ Heather pushed Jessie outside.
Panic propelled her feet forward. I’m running again. She circled the building then stopped to let a vehicle pass. A racing heart rate pounded a beat in her chest. Spotting her car near a large truck, she stepped from the curb. Dread matched each step she took. As she reached her car, she saw a large dog sitting in the passenger seat of the truck. Through an open window, his deep-throated growl showed his displeasure at her presence. ‘Nice doggie.’
The Rottweiler growled again, revealing pearly-white fangs.
‘Shh, good boy.’ Rushing to unlock the car resulted in her hitting the wrong button on the remote. The horn beeped, blaring an annoying sound throughout the parking lot.
The dog barked at the ear-piercing noise coming from her car. People on their way to work turned to look at the disturbance invading the quiet morning.
Jessie dropped her keys. Cursing under a quick breath, she bent, hoping to not pass out from the oxygen running fast and furious through her lungs. She gripped the remote between her fingers and pressed the button to silence.
‘Casper, down.’
Jessie stood straight.
Casper, who in no way resembled a friendly little ghost, followed his owner’s command. The dog now sat composed against the seat.
She recognized the nearing voices, and spun on her heel. Travis and Liam were fast approaching. She wanted to find the nearest rock and crawl under.
‘Jessica?’ Frowning, Liam reached a hand in the truck and patted his dog’s head.
‘You two know each other?’ Travis raised a brow.
Liam nodded then narrowed his stare. ‘This is your Jessie?’ He didn’t wait for an answer. ‘What a small world. Your Jessie is also the girl who dumped me in college. I almost didn’t recognize her without the blonde hair.’
Travis’ stare flicked between Jessie and Liam. He shook his head.
Jessie felt her heart break into little pieces. ‘I didn’t know my ex and your friend were the same person. You didn’t mention his name until last night—’
‘Why didn’t you tell me then?’ He frowned. ‘You know how important honesty is to me.’
Heat filled her cheeks. ‘I’m sorry. I should have—’
Travis held up a hand. ‘I thought you were tired. I thought you were in this relationship as much as I was.’
Was? She grabbed the sleeve of his cotton shirt, but he jerked his arm free. ‘Travis, please let me explain.’
‘I’m not doing this in the middle of a parking lot. I have work to do. You need to leave.’ He turned and stormed to the bakery.
Sadness weighed heavy on her shoulders as she watched him walk away. She squeezed her lips together, nodded at Liam, then opened her car door and slipped inside. Chasing Travis right now was futile. She’d give him time, and then she’d figure a way to make him understand her reaction last night.
***
Jessica had spent the whole day and night curled in the fetal position on her bed. Tears soaked her pillowcase until there were no tears left to cry. Getting out of bed seemed pointless. She picked up her phone for the hundredth time since arriving home after yesterday’s catastrophe. No messages from Travis. A deep hurt rested in the pit of her belly.
She rolled o
ut of bed and turned on the coffee machine. The reflection she saw in the mirror scared her enough to wash her face and brush her teeth. She changed out of yesterday’s wrinkled clothes and into a pair of sweats and a baggy shirt. Just as she turned to take her coffee onto the balcony, she heard a knock on the door. Travis. Her heart skipped a beat. She peered through the peephole.
‘Mr Moretti.’ She opened the door.
‘Heather told me what happened.’
Stepping aside to let him in, she raised her mug. ‘I’m enjoying a coffee on the balcony. Would you like to join me?’
‘Don’t pretend.’ He flicked a finger back and forth. ‘I know you’re hurting.’
‘Simply a crash and burn.’ She shrugged. ‘I’ll get over it.’ Liar!
He leaned on the doorframe. ‘Why are you not at work?’
‘Did Heather forget to tell you about the part where Travis told me to leave?’
‘Were you fired? Did you receive termination papers?’
She frowned, gripping her mug as she reflected on Mr Moretti’s questions. ‘Umm, no.’
‘Then get yourself into some pretty clothes and show Travis you’re prepared to fight.’
She completely agreed with his assessment. The new Jessie must act differently to the way she had in the past. She set her mug on the shelf and gave him a big hug. ‘Thank you, Mr Moretti.’
‘Angelo.’
‘Thank you, Angelo.’
He paused in the hallway. ‘By the way, Heather had nothing to do with my being here.’ He winked. ‘We spoke not a word on how to get you kids back together.’
Smiling, she skipped to her bedroom. If Heather still had faith, then Jessie should too. She wouldn’t run. This time, she had too much to lose.
***
Before going to the bakery, Jessie made a quick stop. She inhaled a breath then opened her car door. Arriving at the fire station might be a bad decision, but something she had to do. An apology was long overdue.
A fireman cleaning one of the trucks told her Liam was inside doing an inspection.
‘Jessica.’ Liam waved a hand as she stepped inside the open garage. ‘This is a surprise.’
Trepidation upset Jessie’s stomach. ‘I was hoping we could talk for a moment.’
He placed the clipboard he’d been holding on a counter. ‘The guys aren’t shy about eavesdropping. Better to talk outside.’ He pointed to a picnic table to the side of the brick building. ‘So, what’s up? You want my help with Travis?’
‘No.’ Her stomach fluttered. Jessie waited for Liam to sit before taking a seat across from him. ‘I’m only here to right a wrong from the past. I should have ended our relationship in person.’ She swallowed. ‘I wasn’t the best girlfriend.’
‘We had a lot going on. Our parents both forcing us into careers we didn’t want. You were to be a doctor. Me a teacher.’ Liam rolled his eyes. ‘You were stronger than me. You had the balls to say no to them.’
She smiled, remembering why she had become fast friends with Liam. He had struggled for a voice as well. ‘I should have spoken to you before I left. I’m sorry for being a coward.’
‘Ah, no need to apologize.’ He tapped her hand. ‘Your disappearance stung, but your leaving wasn’t a surprise. One of us had to man-up and take action.’ Liam glanced at the fire station. ‘I should thank you. Your exit put me on the path to follow my own dream.’
The heavy weight she’d been carrying for years slipped from her shoulders. ‘So, you’re a fireman now, and about to get married. I wish you all the best.’ She grabbed her purse and stood.
Liam walked her to her car. ‘I like you better as a brunette.’ He chuckled then reached out to touch her arm. ‘Look, about Travis, he’ll come around. He really cares about you.’
Warmth flooded her body. She quickly reeled in her excitement. Jessie squeezed his hand. ‘Thank you.’
Fifteen minutes later, Jessie opened the door to the bakery. ‘Good morning, Heather.’
‘Good morning, Jessie.’ Heather rang through a customer’s order. ‘Your appointment went well?’
‘It did. Very well, actually.’ On her way to the fire station, she had messaged Heather to advise her she’d be coming to work, just a little late. Jessie walked behind the counter and leaned next to Heather. ‘Thank you,’ she whispered. Then, after inhaling a deep breath, she pushed through the saloon doors. ‘Good morning, Travis.’
A steel mixing bowl clattered to the floor. ‘What are you doing here?’
She tossed her purse in the closet. ‘Working.’ Jessie didn’t dare make eye contact. She must remain calm, and one look at Travis would melt her composure. ‘Sorry I’m late. I messaged Heather about an early appointment.’
Frowning, Travis pointed a dripping-with-cream spoon at Heather.
Grinning, his mother leaned on one of the open saloon doors. ‘She did.’
Jessie wrapped a cupcake apron—a recent purchase—around her waist. She took a step forward.
But Travis blocked her path. ‘What’s going on? Where are you going?’ A dark stare emphasized his foul mood.
‘I believe that’s obvious.’ She straightened her stand and waved a hand toward the shop. ‘I’m relieving Heather at the front counter.’
‘I asked you to leave.’
‘We had a disagreement yesterday. Today is a new day.’ She willed a breath and squeezed the hem of her apron between her fingers. ‘We have a lot of orders to prepare. Bickering won’t get cakes baked and decorated. During lunch, I’ll design a few sketches of the moulded figures you requested. Until I receive termination papers, I have work to do.’ She nudged his arm to pass then glanced over her shoulder. ‘Unless … you have something else you’d like to discuss?’
‘I … umm … no.’
Jessie’s confidence boosted at the look of uncertainty on Travis’ face. With a reinforced determination, and an ally in his mother, she’d break his wall.
Chapter Ten
Dislodging the tie from his shirt collar, Travis lingered at the far end of the backyard patio at Liam’s parents’ lavish home. Liam and Carla’s wedding went off without a hitch, but then Travis expected as much, since his buddy’s fiancée had planned the event to the smallest detail of pink rose petals scattered along the concrete pathway.
Now, an hour into the reception, Travis continued to nurse the same glass of champagne he’d rose in the air to toast the happily married couple. The perma-smile he wore caused his jaw to lock.
‘You can stop forcing yourself to have fun.’ Liam shoved Travis’ arm. ‘Wait, you’re not even trying. Man, you’re killing the mojo.’
‘What are you talking about? I’m having a great time.’ He forced a chuckle. Pretence wasn’t his strongest attribute.
‘Liar. You’d rather be at the bakery.’
‘No can do. Mom kicked me out. I return to full firefighting duties next week.’ While he couldn’t wait to return to work, he had reservations about walking away from the bakery.
Liam slapped his shoulder. ‘That’s great news.’ Squinting, he paused. ‘Or not?’
He met his friend’s inquisitive stare. ‘I’m worried about my mother. This is a busy time at the shop.’
‘She has Jessica—sorry, Jessie.’
Travis took a swig of champagne and almost spit the warm liquid out of his mouth. He set his glass on the tray carried by a passing server. ‘Jessie is an incredible artist. People love her work, and word is quickly travelling.’
‘The classroom design on the wedding cake is perfect. It brought tears to Carla’s eyes.’ Liam shifted from foot to foot. ‘I’m sure the bakery will survive without you.’
Travis nodded. ‘Mom said she’d call if she needed more help.’ He thought best to not mention his mother’s words of him making more out of the situation with Jessie. You can’t fix what’s not broken was her advice.
‘How long do you plan to continue beating yourself?’
‘What?’
Liam grabbed
his arm. ‘You can’t stand the thought of not seeing Jessie every day, so you’d rather torture yourself, instead of admitting the truth.’ He tightened his grip. ‘You’ve fallen in love with her.
Reality hit him like a sucker-punch to the gut. Travis didn’t dispute Liam’s theory. He had missed Jessie being in his arms, but he wouldn’t suffer as his mother had from his father holding back his health condition. ‘I can’t be in a relationship with someone who keeps secrets.’
‘What secret? She didn’t know about me. The past is the past. We talked, and we’ve moved on—’
‘You spoke to Jessie?’ He squeezed the tie in his hand.
‘Jessie came by the fire station. She apologized for the past.’
‘She left you without warning.’ The real fear he held rose to the surface. ‘Who’s to say she won’t do the same again?’
Shaking his head, Liam sighed. ‘She’d been honest about wanting more from the day we met. We didn’t love each other.’ He punched Travis’ arm. ‘She loves you.’
A breath caught in his throat. Could that be true? Travis held tight to the possibility.
‘A wise man once told me to suck-it-up and fall in love,’ Liam joked. ‘I took my buddy’s advice and married my soulmate. You should take that same counsel and go get your woman.’
Travis didn’t require further encouragement. He pulled Liam into a hug. ‘Thank you, man.’ He stepped backward, shoved his tie in his pocket, and grabbed his tuxedo jacket. ‘I have somewhere I have to be.’
***
Jessie shaved the rice crispy treats into shapes of bunny ears, a round head, feet, and hands. She then covered them in buttercream and placed them in the fridge. She owed a big thank you to Heather for pre-making the buttercream and for training Jessie in how to apply it to crispy treats.
The clock on the wall showed fifteen minutes after eight. Another long day, but she had one last task before calling it a night. Everything hurt—her feet, her legs, her head, her heart. With the bakery in peak season, Jessie and Heather fell into a comfortable routine. They took turns at the front counter and in the kitchen. Tonight, she offered to stay late in order to get ahead on a few moulding projects. Work kept her mind busy and off Travis. Giving him a few days of space had become harder with each passing day. She missed him.