All I Ever Wanted

by Francis Ray

  Naomi’s trembling hand closed around the key ring. “I get them now?”

  “I told them you were a teacher with a small daughter and since your credit score was excellent and the down payment good, the sale should go through without a hitch. I added that you were anxious to move in and have the house ready by the time school was out,” Sierra told her. “By the way, a locksmith reset the locks; those are new keys. I have one, but I’ll turn it over to you as soon as you sign at the mortgage company. It can be Kayla’s when she’s older.”

  “I don’t know how to thank you,” Naomi said.

  “That smile on your face is enough.” Sierra looked behind her. “And here she comes.”

  “Hi, Mrs. Sierra. The monitor wouldn’t let me go until I finished my corn.” Kayla screwed up her face. “I don’t like corn.”

  Sierra leaned down to her. “I dislike green peas and brussels sprouts.”

  “Yuck!” Kayla said.

  Naomi squatted down to her daughter. “Can you keep another secret?”

  “Yes, ma’am.”

  She held up the keys. “We got the house.”

  Kayla hugged her. “Can you start thinking more about the brown puppy now?”

  “Your daughter will go far in life.” Sierra chuckled.

  “That’s definitely a possibility.” Naomi came to her full height. “Thank you again.”

  “My pleasure. I better go before we have a visitor.” She checked her watch. “I promised Rio a full week of no problems.”

  Frowning, Naomi glanced over Sierra’s shoulder. “Where are they?”

  “One’s at the school’s entrance and the other is just off the hallway. The things I do for love.” Sierra leaned over and whispered, “Your and Kayla’s names are engraved on the key chain. There’s room enough for another name. Good-bye.”

  She meant Richard. Some of Naomi’s happiness faded. Their relationship wasn’t forever.

  “Mama, you look sad,” Kayla said.

  Smiling, Naomi scooped her up to hug her before putting her down. She needed that hug. She’d just enjoy the time with Richard with no regrets. “Just thinking. How about we invite Richard over tonight and celebrate?”

  “Yeah,” Kayla shouted. Her mother put her finger to her lips and smiled back at her.

  * * *

  “I can’t believe it.” Holding Richard’s hand, she walked though the house that afternoon. She’d driven there straight from work. She hadn’t been able to wait. She’d called him and he’d met her there.

  On arriving, she was happy to see that the front yard had been mowed, the rosebush trimmed back, all the windows washed. Sierra was as efficient as usual.

  “You did it.” Richard kissed her on the cheek. “I’m proud of you. What do you want to tackle first?”

  She held her hand to her chest and laughed nervously. “I don’t know.”

  “Let’s start at the top with painting and move down to the floors. Once that’s done, you can make the draperies. I can seed the backyard to get the grass growing. Luckily that type doesn’t need much water.”

  Naomi looked out the patio door. Kayla was jumping, trying to grab a plum from the fruit tree. “I think she likes it here.”

  Richard’s arms went around her waist and he pulled her back against him. “She’s a wonderful little girl. Anywhere you are, she’s happy. You’re a good mother. It wasn’t easy, but she’s proof it was worth every sacrifice.”

  He understood that so well. And she’d been alone until she came to Santa Fe. She angled her head and kissed his chin. “Despite my talk of being independent, I like having you to talk to, be with.” She grinned. “Among other things.”

  “Yeah. I better go say good-bye to Kayla and get back to the office.”

  “Will I see you tonight?” she asked as he started out the door.

  “Count on it.”

  Laughing, Naomi watched Richard lift Kayla so she could finally reach the fruit. Taking it from her, he went to the outside faucet and washed it, then gave it back to her. She took a bite and then offered the plum to him. Together they shared the fruit. Kayla loved him so much. He was easy to love. He—

  With a jolt, Naomi realized she loved him as well. She staggered as if that would take the thought back. It didn’t. How could she have let this happen? She’d promised herself she’d never be vulnerable again. Not even to a good man like Richard.

  Her fingertips covered the lower half of her face. He must never know. She was too vulnerable where he was concerned. If he knew, he’d push for a deeper relationship. This was all she could handle now, perhaps forever.

  Richard must never know she had fallen hopelessly in love with him.

  * * *

  The next evening, Naomi was humming to herself, cleaning out the cabinets beneath the sink of her new home. The uncertainty of the night before was gone. She was going to take one day at a time.

  She reached farther back under the cabinet. A lizard darted close to her hand. She screamed, barely missing hitting her head when she jerked back. Without thinking she ran, screaming Richard’s name. He’d been painting Kayla’s room. He met her in the hallway. “What is it?”

  “A lizard!”

  Trying not to smile, he pulled her into his arms and gently brushed his lips across hers. “It won’t hurt you, and he’s probably long gone by now. I’ll put an organic deterrent out tomorrow.”

  Once her heart stopped racing, she stared up at him. Another man might have been angry or called her foolish. Richard had comforted and reassured her. She placed her head on his chest again. If she had to be foolish and fall in love, she’d picked good, as Sierra would say.

  “You all right?”

  She sighed and relaxed against him even more. “Just thinking. If I saw another lizard, would I get another kiss?”

  He lifted her head and kissed her. “Answer your question?”

  “Yes.”

  “Then why are you still standing here?”

  “Guess.” She liked teasing him, liked flirting.

  Pulling her more securely into his arms, he kissed her until her toes curled in her tennis shoes. Slowly she opened her eyes. “You amaze me.”

  “You inspire me. Now back to work.”

  She had to ask. “How can you be so calm?”

  “Because I’ve had practice and, if I kiss you again, we’ll end up on this hard floor making love.” Dark passion swirled in his beautiful eyes. “Your skin is too delicate and I treasure you too much to hurt you in any way.”

  Her heart and body quickened. “There’s a blanket in the emergency kit in my car. “

  “Where are your keys?”

  * * *

  Naomi hummed as she painted the walls in the open area. She felt good. It felt good getting the house ready for them to move it, but it also felt good working beside Richard. She stopped, smiled, and looked across the room at him. He was painting as well.

  For the past two weeks they’d worked together whenever they got the chance. They’d gone shopping for paint, material for the draperies, and to secondhand stores looking for patio furniture. He never seemed to care how long she took or how indecisive she was. He was patient and understanding. They’d been on dates with just the two of them, and with Kayla. He made sure she never felt left out. He’d even taught her his private cell phone number in case she needed to call.

  He’d slipped effortlessly into their lives. Once she’d dreaded the sound of a man’s heavy footsteps, the sound of his car door closing, a man touching her. She welcomed them now.

  “I think someone is loafing,” Richard said, still painting. “The walls won’t paint themselves.”

  Dipping the roller in paint, she rolled it against the wall. “I’m almost finished and you’re not.”

  “Because you got a head start on me.” He glanced over. “Looks good.”

  Naomi stared at the wall. She’d been afraid to try at first. She’d recalled too well her ex-husband’s humiliating words. With Richard sh
e’d try anything. And had. She giggled. Richard had purchased an air mattress to go with the blanket.

  “What’s so funny?” He picked up his paint tray and roller and went to the kitchen sink.

  Naomi followed with her things. He reached for them when she stopped beside him.

  “Are you going to tell me or do I have to guess?”

  She looked up at him through a sweep of her lashes. “You’ve made me shameless and I sort of like it.”

  He kissed her on the lips. “I love it.”

  Her smile trembling, she turned away. “I better go put the lid on the paint.”

  His hand closed around her arm before she had gone two steps. “I thought we agreed to talk.”

  “Isn’t that what we’re doing?”

  His brows arched. She wasn’t fooling him. “I mention love and you take off. Now you won’t look at me.”

  Her head lifted. His eyes were so intense, she could get lost in them. “This is all I can give.”

  His hand flexed on her arm. “If I want more?”

  She fought the misery sweeping though her. If she lost him … “This is all I can give.”

  His fingers uncurled. He went back to the sink. “You better close that paint.”

  She’d hurt him. Going to him, she circled his waist from behind, tightened his arms when he shifted, and placed her cheek against his back. “I know it’s selfish, but I don’t want to lose you, to lose this.”

  “Marriage would make it better.”

  Although she knew what he was thinking, she flinched. Her eyes shut tightly. “To you marriage is love and honor and commitment for a lifetime. To me it’s pain and humiliation and embarrassment.”

  He turned then and took her arms in his damp hands. “You’ve seen Catherine and Luke, and the others. You know it doesn’t have to be that way.”

  “Don’t ask me for more than I can give,” she whispered. “Please. Don’t leave me. Us.”

  “Never.” He held her at arm’s length. “A man can’t walk away from his heart.”

  Her heart stumbled. She loved him so much. She kissed him, giving with her body what she couldn’t say with words.

  * * *

  A little after seven Thursday night, Naomi pulled the baking dish out of the oven and placed it on top of the kitchen stove. She’d been home less than an hour after stopping by the house again to remeasure the windows for the draperies. Mrs. Cruz, a fourth-grade teacher, was the unofficial director of all of the school plays and made their costumes. She was letting Naomi borrow her portable machine this coming weekend. The house was coming together, and the side benefits weren’t bad.

  She paused and thought of her and Richard’s discussion on marriage. Thank goodness the subject hadn’t come up again. Hearing the familiar knock on the front door, she checked her reflection in the toaster and hurried to the front door. Richard was coming over for dinner. Unlocking the locks, she opened the door with a smile. It slowly faded. She began to tremble.

  “Honey, it’s all right,” Richard quickly said.

  No it isn’t. She knew it the moment she saw the anger on Richard’s face. She’d have known something was wrong even if Catherine and Luke hadn’t been standing directly behind him. Dread clawed at her throat. “Is he in Santa Fe?”

  “No, baby,” Richard said, stepping inside and pulling her into his arms. She clung.

  “Dr. Richard. Mrs. Catherine. Mr. Grayson,” Kayla greeted happily as she came into the living room from her bedroom.

  “Hello, Kayla,” Catherine said, stepping past Richard and Naomi. “How was school today?”

  “It was good, but I’m glad tomorrow is Friday,” she said. “I’m going to a birthday party and, when I come home, we’re going to a movie.”

  “Sweetheart.” Naomi tried to keep the smile on her face, her voice normal. “I need to speak with Richard and Catherine alone. Why don’t you finish your homework in your room?”

  “Dr. Richard, you won’t leave, will you?” she asked.

  He placed his hand on her small shoulder. “No way.”

  Picking up her books from the living room floor, Kayla went to her room.

  Naomi whirled to them the instant Kayla was out of sight. “Tell me.”

  Richard curved his arm around her waist and started for the sofa. “Why don’t you—”

  “No.” She resisted, hating that fear was making her skin cold. “Please.”

  “He was fired three days ago from his security job,” Luke said. “That same night he had a fight with his live-in girlfriend. Someone called the police. She had a busted lip, but she said she fell.”

  Naomi momentarily closed her eyes, remembered her fear and her lies out of shame, and then to protect Kayla. She looked from one to the other. If that was all there was, they wouldn’t be here. “What’s the rest of it?”

  “His credit card popped up yesterday in Amarillo,” Richard said.

  Her hand covered her mouth. “That’s on the way here.”

  “And a lot of other places,” Luke said. “There’s been no other activity on the card. His checking account has less than a hundred dollars in it. He won’t receive his severance check for a couple of weeks. He didn’t strike me as a man who kept a lot of cash on hand.”

  “She could have given him the money.” Naomi’s arms wrapped around her waist. “You do anything to keep him happy. Anything.”

  Richard pulled her into his arms, felt helpless as she shivered. “You’re safe.”

  She wanted to believe that, but she’d thought that before. “Kayla.” Pushing out of his arms, she started for her daughter’s room.

  Richard held her. “She’s all right.”

  Logically she knew that, but the fear remained. “I need to see her.”

  “No. Not until you calm down,” Richard told her.

  She pulled away and was surprised when he didn’t release her, but feeling afraid or threatened never entered her mind. “Please.”

  “Naomi, he’s right.” Catherine gently touched her arm. “As long as you keep your head, keep control, you don’t let him win. You said it yourself. He doesn’t want you happy. He’ll do anything to rattle you. Make you live in fear. Don’t let him win.”

  Closing her eyes, she buried her head against Richard’s chest. “In my head, I know you’re right, but…”

  “I’ll put a guy outside the apartment tonight and tomorrow night,” Luke said. “He’ll follow you to school and back home.”

  Her head lifted. “Thank—”

  “I’ll take the shift tonight and see that they get to school,” Richard said. “I’d appreciate someone seeing they get home.”

  “You are not going to watch over us, then go to work.”

  “I’ve pulled all-nighters before. This is important. Until you feel safe, I want to be here as much as possible.”

  And she wanted him there. “Thank you.” She turned to Luke and Catherine. “Thank you both.”

  “This is what friends do.” Catherine took her hands in hers. “I’m going to go get Kayla. We’ll only stay for a little while.”

  “No. You’ll stay for dinner,” Naomi said, her control slowly returning. “I made enchiladas because I thought Fallon was joining us, but she’s working on a deadline. There’s enough.”

  “Naomi’s a good cook.” Richard said proudly.

  She blushed at the compliment. “Afterward, we can ride over and I can finally show you the house.”

  “Oh, I’d love to. Sierra said you got a good deal.”

  “Thanks to her.” Naomi faced Luke and discovered that his size didn’t intimidate her any longer. “Your sister is amazing at what she does.”

  “And like Brandon, she is as competitive as they come,” Luke said. “Marriage has helped settle her a bit, but she has a long way to go.”

  Naomi didn’t dare look at Richard. Luke knew his sister well. “Catherine, if you’ll get Kayla, I’ll go set the table.”

  * * *

  Through dinner an
d showing the house to Luke and Catherine, Richard watched as Naomi conquered her fear and relaxed more and more. By the time they’d said good night to Luke and Catherine, and they’d put Kayla to bed, she was almost her old self.

  “You sure you’ll be all right sleeping out here?”

  He pulled the pillow from her hand. She’d already put a sheet and blanket on the sofa. “I won’t be sleeping.”

  She bit her lower lip and hugged her arms around her waist. Tossing the pillow aside, he took her into his arms. “He won’t get to you.”

  She pressed against his hard length. “I knew he wouldn’t like seeing us happy. Why won’t he leave us alone?”

  “He’s a coward and a bully, but you’re not the same woman anymore.”

  Her head lifted. “How can you be so sure?”

  His hand palmed her cheek. “Because you’re standing here with me, trusting me to keep you safe instead of in your car leaving.” She didn’t deny it. “You won’t let him win.”

  “Because of you and Catherine. Mostly you. You made the difference.”

  “I’ll always be here for you,” he said, wishing he could say more. Now wasn’t the time to bring up marriage again. “Now go to bed. I’ll see you in the morning.”

  “It’s barely nine,” she protested.

  “I’m sure you have lesson plans or something to do.” He sat on the sofa, picked up a magazine on the table, and began flipping through it. He was weak where she was concerned. “’Night.”

  “Can I get you anything else?”

  “I’m good. ’Night.”

  “Good night.”

  Richard placed the magazine back on the coffee table and leaned back on the sofa. He’d wanted to hold her some more, but he wasn’t sure of his control. She didn’t deserve to have that bastard disrupt her and Kayla’s life again. If he showed up, Richard was going to take great pleasure in kicking his good-for-nothing ass.

  Chapter 15

  Stepping out of the shower the next morning, Naomi smelled coffee. Thanks to Richard, she’d been able to sleep. She’d peeped in on him earlier, saw the bedding neatly folded and him entering data on his cell phone.