by Norah Wilson
“Right. That other job.”
April bit her lip. She really was going to have to start combing through the want ads. But it would have to be a good job, with a good setup for Sid. One where she felt more—
“I’m pretty smart.” Sidney pulled out one of her arms and lay back on her pillows.
Pretty smart? Did she know there was no job lined up?
“I know the difference between reality and make-believe. I really do, Mom. But…”
“But what?”
She shrugged her thin shoulders. Twice. And her breathing was fast and shallow. April recognized the signs. This was vitally important to her daughter, and she was searching for the right words. The magic words that would convince an adult.
“Go ahead,” she encouraged. “Just say it.”
“Can’t I at least pretend? Just for a while? Just until I can’t pretend anymore? Like, the very last minute.”
Sidney’s words slayed her. “Ladybug…”
“Deep down, I know that it’s not going to last forever. Or very long at all. I know that, Mom. But for the little while we’re here, can’t we just pretend?”
April stood and walked to the window so Sidney wouldn’t see the glint of tears. Pulling back the curtain, she looked out on the yard, only partially revealed by the sentinel light that stood midway between the house and the Far South Barn. As she watched, Scott came out of the barn. Axl materialized out of the shadows to join him and the two of them walked toward the house.
She turned to Sidney. “If I agree to let you pretend—”
“Thank you, Mom!”
“Whoa, wait a sec. I said if. I need an assurance from you. If we agree to pretend, that means I’ll have to stop reminding you all the time that we’re leaving after Christmas. But I need an assurance from you that you won’t forget the reality. That you won’t forget we’re just pretending.”
“I won’t. Promise,” she said gravely. “But I can’t promise not to keep wishing.”
She was a little girl growing up so fast, April was almost glad she could still believe in wishes. “Deal. Now I need something more from you.”
“What?”
She heard claws on the steps and the labored breathing as Axl made his way up the stairs. “Ember’s out again tonight, and Arden is at Faye’s for a while. Titus is…well, I think he and Ocean went for a drive. I need to go out and help tidy up the barn, but that will leave just you and Axl in here. Which means I need you to promise to stay in bed.”
“What if I need to pee?”
April rolled her eyes. “Okay, you can go as far as the bathroom if you need to pee, then right back to bed.”
“Okay, I’ll stay put. Promise. I don’t like to disturb Axl anyway.” On cue, Axl entered the room. “Come on, boy!” Sidney sat up to encourage the old dog as he climbed onto the bed. “Good dog.”
Axl executed a couple of circles and settled himself gingerly on the empty side of the bed. Sidney gently scratched the thick ruff of fur on his neck and shoulders and he let out a groan of ecstasy that made Sid smile.
“So, you’re all set?”
“Yeah, I’m good. And I’m not scared or anything, not with Axl here.”
“Good. And we won’t be too long.”
“’Night, Mom.” Sidney lay back on the pillows.
April drew the covers over her. “Goodnight, Ladybug.”
At the door, she turned off the light, leaving just the night light beside the vanity on. Closing the door gently, she stood there a moment, listening to the silence of the empty house.
God, she hoped she hadn’t made a mistake, agreeing to let Sidney pretend. It would make leaving that much harder. But her daughter seemed to need this.
And wasn’t she basically doing the same thing with Scott?
She sighed, banishing those thoughts. There was no point second-guessing herself now. Like Sidney, she might as well enjoy the here and now, because it would be over soon enough.
She changed out of her gypsy costume quickly, then went down the hall to the bathroom and brushed her teeth. As she wiped her mouth, she caught sight of herself in the mirror. Her eyes were alight with anticipation, and it wasn’t all sexual. She just couldn’t wait to be with him.
Turning away from her reflection, she headed for the stairs.
Chapter 20
SCOTT FELT April’s gaze on him as he rolled up the last strand of pumpkin lights.
“Sad to see them go?”
He looked up at her. “Who? The zombies?”
“The lights.” She crossed to the table and opened the packing box.
“Rapunzel, Rapunzel…put those lovely orange locks away for another year.” So saying, he dropped the pumpkin lights unceremoniously into the box. There. That was the last of the tidying. Taking stuff down had gone a lot faster than putting it up. It was all done inside of an hour. Of course, he’d had help. A couple of neighbors had hung around to help before heading home.
April closed the box’s lid. “Did you see that little ginger-haired girl dressed as Rapunzel?”
“Yeah, I did. She’s Albert and Debbie Saracen’s girl.”
“That was her real hair. Did you know that? I couldn't believe it when her mother told me.”
She finished taping the box closed, and Scott shoved it beneath the table with the others he’d stowed there. Eventually, it would all go back in the sectioned off storage room behind the make-shift stage, but the area desperately needing a good cleaning first.
“I’ll have the new guy put these away on Monday.” It was as easy a way to approach the new hire as anything. He had to tread carefully to make sure April didn’t think David’s position was on account of anything to do with her.
“You hired someone?”
“One of the young lads who worked for Titus a few weeks ago.”
“Why?”
Damn.
“We need a little extra help, and he can use the cash. Like I told you, we hire someone every year.”
“So you said. But you hired me.”
“We need more help.”
She didn’t look convinced. “I thought there wasn’t that much to do, this deep into the fall?”
“We still have to get through apple-picking season,” he pointed out. “But the kicker is that I’ve got some repair projects to do around the house. If I’m going to see to them and see to the farm too, I just need an extra body for a while.”
She seemed to relax a little. “I just don’t want to feel like a charity case.”
“You’re not.” Quickly, to change focus, he said, “David was really happy to get the work. I’m pretty sure he’s looking to buy a promise ring for his girlfriend, Sally, for Christmas. He’s saving up, and well, the few hours we can give him—and they’re only a few—are going to help.”
“David I met. But Sally…” She frowned, obviously sorting through the image bank of new faces she would have seen tonight. “Wait, I think I saw him with a girl. Anne of Green Gables?”
He smiled. “That’s her.”
“I met her mom.” April glanced around the barn. “So, I guess we’re done in here?”
“Yup. So now what?”
April eyed him. “What did you have in mind? The night’s not exactly young…”
“It’s not that late,” he said. “Besides, it’s Saturday.”
She grabbed his hand, turned his wrist to look at his watch. “It’s after eleven.”
“After eleven? Oh, well, then, we’d better head in, warm up some milk. Maybe break out the BenGay.”
She laughed, but she didn’t release his hand. He took that as promising.
“Okay, you have a point,” She said. “But we really should go back to the house. Sidney’s in there alone. Well, Sidney and Axl. Thank you, by the way, for letting him in.”
“She’s not alone anymore. Uncle Arden’s home. Didn’t you hear his Jeep roll in while we were packing up the lights?”
“Really?” She went to the door and
cracked it. “You’re right. I didn’t even notice.”
“The Scrabble game must have gone quickly tonight.”
April laughed. “Yeah. Must have.”
He didn’t know what was so funny about that, but he did so enjoy hearing her laugh. She didn’t do it often enough.
“Hey, why don’t we head in to the Duchess Diner?” He would love to introduce April to the Duchess. “Best fish and chips in Harkness. Wait, what am I saying? Best in the province.”
“Seriously?” She looked at him as if he were crazy. “I couldn’t eat another bite. I’m sure I sampled a little bit of everything.”
“Professional interest?”
“Naturally.”
He felt her thumb move on the back of his hand and looked down at their now joined fingers. Then back up at her face.
“You know what I’d really like to do?” she said.
His heart sped up at the banked excitement in her eyes. “What?”
“Let’s go for a walk.”
That wasn’t what he thought she was going to suggest. But now that she mentioned it, it was the perfect night for a walk. “Great idea.” He looked at her appraisingly. “So, are you up for a little adventure?”
“Does it have to be little?”
His heart leaped again at the dangerous look in her eyes. This was a side of her he hadn’t seen.
“Well?” She let the word hang there.
He pulled his phone out and hit Arden’s number. “Uncle Arden, all good over at Faye’s? Yeah? Good.” He met April’s gaze. “If it’s okay with you, April and I are going out for a spell. Would you? That’d be great. I’ll tell her that. And thanks.”
She looked at him questioningly.
“We’re good to go. He’s in for the night and will leave the porch light on for us.”
Chapter 21
DESPITE SCOTT’S assurances, April scooted into the house to check with Arden. Not because she didn’t believe he was eager to help, but because it was the polite thing to do. The right thing to do. She found him in the living room in his easy chair with a book.
“April?” He looked up, surprised. “I thought you and Scott were going out?”
“We are. I just…are you sure you’re okay with this?”
“Hundred and ten percent sure. I’ll read down here for a while before I go up to bed. But don’t worry; when I do turn in, I’ll leave my door open. If Sid gets up, I’m sure I’ll hear her. And if not her, Axl. He thumps around like a moose getting down those stairs.”
She smiled. “Thanks so much. I’ll just go check to make sure she’s asleep.”
He waved her on.
She ran up the stairs lightly and poked her head into Ember’s bedroom. Axl lifted his big, boxy head briefly, then lowered it. Her little Minnesota Viking didn’t stir. From the sound of her breathing, April knew she was sound asleep.
With a smile on her face, she went down the hall to her own room. Or rather, Scott’s room. Except for a floral patterned comforter that Ember had tossed on the bed, the room looked pretty much the way it must have when Scott left at age eighteen, complete with football paraphernalia and heavy metal posters. So weird, glimpsing a teenage Scott. Weird, but undeniably sweet.
She was feeling pretty much like a teenager herself, getting weak-kneed over a boy. But so be it. She’d been over this mental ground a hundred times. She wasn’t going to take herself to task for it. No point ruining the moment. Like her daughter, she knew the difference between reality and make-believe. The time to confront reality again would come soon enough, but until then, she intended to enjoy her time with Scott.
She decided against makeup—it was dark, after all— but put on some fresh lip gloss. Then, with excitement zinging through her veins, she swapped her old coat for her new leather bomber jacket, zipping it up snugly. It looked just as good as she remembered, perfectly tailored to flatter. Digging through a box in the corner, one of many she hadn’t unpacked, she unearthed her red winter hat and mittens. She pulled the hat down on her forehead and checked her reflection in the mirror.
When it came to the clothing budget, Sidney’s needs always came first. Always. But Ocean and Ember had taken April to an upscale second-hand store a couple of days ago, where she’d scored the new jacket for ten bucks. With her red hat and mitts, she thought she looked pretty good.
She’d had such fun shopping with the girls. They’d have to do it again. Ember had looked at everything, from jewelry to dishes, likening the search to treasure hunting. “You never know when you’re going to find a jewel worth keeping.”
Ocean had gone straight for the used books, delighting when she found a pristine copy of Watership Down. Apparently she’d loaned her copy to one of her New York friends. Greg Somebody-or-Other. From the girls’ discussion, April gathered he was a famous music producer or something. Ocean insisted the relationship, while close, was completely platonic.
Then Ocean casually mentioned she’d invited him to Harkness for Christmas.
Yikes! April really hoped that if this guy actually came, it wouldn’t create any ugliness. In the world she’d grown up in—which admittedly was no model of normal, well-adjusted behavior—that would be like setting a match to a fuse.
Outside her bedroom window, April saw the headlights of Arden’s Jeep swing from the garage toward the kitchen. Her ride.
She ran downstairs, stopping to say goodnight to Arden before letting herself out. She wanted to dash to the vehicle but managed a sedate, adult pace.
He leaned across the narrow vehicle and jacked the passenger door open for her.
“You look beautiful,” he said when she jumped into the cab.
She laughed. “You’re easy to please.”
“Not at all. You look fantastic. I really like your new jacket. Very hot.”
She’d hoped he’d like it, but now that he’d mentioned it, she felt a little self-conscious. “Just dressing for the weather.”
“Yeah, it is getting chilly, isn’t it? Give this beast a few minutes and we’ll have some heat coming.”
He drove slowly down the driveway, the lights uncovering the road ahead in a way April found almost mesmerizing. Which went to show how infrequently she’d dated. She could count on one hand the number of times she’d been in a car like this, in the dark with a boy, traveling toward a destination. That hadn’t been allowed in the Morgan home. Not with her father’s strict rules about girls and how they were supposed to behave.
Or not behave. That was more like it. No speaking unless spoken to. Blending into the background so as not to be seen. Definitely no laughing.
No. She would not let her thoughts go there. That world was behind her. Her father would not be ruining this night.
“So, when I suggested we go for a walk, what made you decide to get the Jeep?”
“Did you really want to walk this boring road?” He glanced at her. “I mean, you’ve been up and down it a dozen times already, right?”
“Yeah, but only in daylight.” Even though it was technically within the Harkness town limits, the Shadow Road didn’t have street lights like the more residential roads. “I’d never walk it at night. Well, not by myself.”
“Smart decision,” he said. “Also, thank you.”
She frowned. “For what? Not walking alone at night?”
“Exactly.” Signaling a right-hand turn, he turned onto the road at the end of the driveway. “Ember used to jog that road, back when we were in school.”
“She’s in great shape.”
“Yeah, she’s always been athletic. She used to go jogging in the early morning, at least five times a week.”
April felt a twinge of envy. She’d always loved walking, but even in high school, her father wouldn’t permit even that tiny bit of autonomy. To take a long walk alone—or run, as Ember had done—would have been the height of freedom. Pure luxury. As it often did, it struck her anew how abnormal what passed for “normal” in the Morgan household had truly been. She’
d been permitted to walk only to the end of the driveway to catch the school bus. The only times she’d defied that restriction was when she fled the house to escape one of her father’s drunken rages. Even then, she never went further than the vacant, overgrown, weed-choked lot across the street, sneaking back in while her father slept it off. Fortunately, he usually woke with no recollection of her flight.
Usually.
“At first, Axl would go with her, but he wasn’t very keen on rolling out that early in the morning.”
Scott’s words pulled her back from those dark memories. She smiled. “I noticed he likes his comforts, but I thought that was because he’s old.”
“He’s definitely arthritic now,” he confirmed, “but he never did like to stir before dawn.”
“So once she started leaving the guard dog at home, you took over the role, suddenly becoming an avid jogger yourself?”
“Not quite. I became a champion of stealth.”
Champion of stealth? “A stalker, you mean?”
He took his eyes off the road long enough to give her a wounded look. “What is it with you and Ember? She called me a stalker too.”
“Imagine that. A guy can’t follow a woman down a long and lonely road, morning after morning, without being labeled. Hardly seems fair, does it?”
“Okay, when you put it that way, it sounds a little stalkerish,” he admitted. “But there are things out here you wouldn’t want to encounter alone, and I’m not just talking about the random, bearded, shaggy-haired whack-jobs of my imagination. Depending on the season, you might blunder into a bear with her cubs. Or a bull moose in rut. Hell, even a buck.”
“I know. Just teasing.”
They drove along in comfortable silence. April watched the trees whiz by. Alder bushes. “I used to hide in alders bushes as a child.” The words were out before she could stop them. Before she could push back thoughts of Dick Morgan.
She glanced at Scott. His hands were white-knuckled on the steering wheel.
“I’m guessing you weren’t playing hide and seek,” he said.