Songbird

by Josephine Cox

  Turning again, he nervously smiled at the officer. As before, the other man made no response. Instead, he stared down on him through those shark-like eyes, his hard expression seemingly set in stone.

  The little man twitched and focused on the door through which Drayton would arrive any minute.

  The moment he had the thought, the door opened, and Drayton swaggered to the table where he pulled out the chair and sat down, his eyes riveted on little Danny. “I take it you’ve got something for me?” Leaning forward he kept his voice low, so as not to be overheard.

  Markedly jumpy, Danny glanced about.

  “What the hell does that mean? You’ve either found her or you haven’t.” Having recently tangled with the worst kind of enemy behind bars, Drayton was in no mood for games. “Well?”

  Not relishing the news he had to impart, Danny jogged Drayton’s memory. “Do you recall Jimmy Norman – the man who used to do a bit of running for you, at the club?”

  Drayton wasn’t listening. He was watching as the guards escorted in a huge mountain of a man. Physically daunting, with wide beefy shoulders and the neck of a bull, he seemed to dwarf the officers who flanked him.

  Two days ago Brewster was sentenced to life. Powerful and merciless, his aim was to bring the other prisoners in Brixton under his control. However, he had not reckoned with Drayton – and there was already bad blood between them.

  Now, when he sauntered by, the atmosphere in the room was dark with loathing.

  “As I was saying…” Sensing trouble, the little man called Drayton’s attention back. “Jimmy Norman…”

  “Dammit, man, get on with it!” With his eyes boring into the back of Brewster’s head, Drayton looked fit to kill.

  As quickly as he could, Danny told his story. “It seems one of Jimmy’s mates runs a gambling joint in Blackpool. Jimmy was up there – apparently the two of them are going into some venture or oth-” Seeing the look on Drayton’s face, he began to gabble nervously. “Bottom line is this. Jimmy was in Lytham when he spotted yer woman.”

  Seeing how Drayton’s face lit up, he swiftly explained, “Sorry, boss, but you’re not gonna like this. Y’see, Jimmy had no idea you were looking for her, so when he recognized her from the club, he just thought to make a play for her. She gave him an address, and later when he called there, the landlord said he didn’t have no idea who this Maddy was. In fact, he threatened to make Jimmy pay for some other woman who had left the week before without paying the rent.”

  “Stupid bastard!” Drayton pressed his clenched fists so hard against the table, the blood drained from his knuckles. “So the little trollop fooled him, did she?”

  “Seems like it, yes, but one good thing’s come out of it. At least we’ve an idea where to be looking. I’m on to it, boss. You can count on me. North, south, east or west, trust me. There will be no stone left unturned.”

  Sixteen

  A week had passed. A week of sleepless nights. And tonight was no different. Exhausted though she was, Maddy could not sleep.

  Ever since the bad experience in Lytham, she could only suspect that all too soon, her whole world would come crashing in on her.

  She could flee. She had done it before and if need be, she could do it again. As far as she knew, Ellen was in no danger from Drayton. But what about the baby? If Drayton wanted her out of the way, there would be no real reason why he should want to spare the child. He had never accepted it as being his, and never would. If anything, he probably hated the child even more than he hated her.

  Sitting cross-legged on her bed, she swayed back and forth, going over everything in her mind. “I have to leave,” she murmured. “If I stay here, it could be disastrous for everybody. But if I leave, where will I go?”

  Maddy knew it would be hard. She’d need to get as far away from here as possible. Find work. Make a home. And what of little Michael? Though her baby had come along in leaps and bounds and the doctors assured her his lungs were now as normal as those of any other baby, he had only this past week finished his hospital appointments. I don’t want to leave him here with Ellen, she thought. She had an agonizing choice to make. But then again, she couldn’t put him in danger by dragging him from pillar to post. What to do? What to do?

  Another sobering thought crossed her mind. If she left him behind, would she ever see him again? Climbing off the bed, she began pacing, searching for alternatives.

  The night outside her window grew darker and thicker, and still she paced the floor. The darkness broke and the dawn crept over the horizon, and she was no nearer to some kind of solution.

  After a while, she came to realize that, for the sake of those she loved above all others, she had no option but to take the only route left open to her.

  She had to leave, and it had to be now, before full daylight came to change her mind.

  It took but a few minutes to wash, brush her hair and get dressed. She kicked off her slippers and thrust her feet into the one pair of sturdy walking shoes she owned.

  Going to the wardrobe, she took out an overnight bag and put in it only the most essential items: a hairbrush, toothpaste and toothbrush, underwear, warm tights, a clean skirt and blouse, and a big thick jumper.

  She was already closing the bag when she remembered the club photographs. She climbed onto the chair and, reaching up to the top of the wardrobe, she retrieved the brown envelope, which she then slid into the bag.

  She did not look at the photographs; she had no wish to. There were far more pressing things on her mind right now.

  After putting on her winter coat, she stood awhile looking out of the window at the changing skies, the tears flowing down her face and her heart raw with pain. It was like her world had come to an end… again!

  Going to the crib, she lifted her son into her arms and gently rocked him. “You know how very much I love you, don’t you?” she whispered. “You know I would do anything for you.”

  She kissed his eyelids and pressed her face to his, and when he stirred, she tucked him back into the cot. To gaze on that tiny face and know she might never see it again was too much to bear.

  In that awful, precious moment, she thought she had never felt so alone; not even when she was in that dark alley, with Alice and Jack lying so still on the ground.

  Hardly able to see for the tears that blurred her vision, she padded downstairs to the kitchen, where she went to the dresser drawer and, taking out a pen and paper, began to write:

  My dearest friend Ellen,

  Please don’t think me a coward for leaving like this, but I honestly cannot see any other way to keep you and baby Michael safe from harm. I brought trouble here, and now I must take it away with me.

  I think we both know that the man who stopped me in Lytham was sent by him, or will be reporting it back to him. And we both know that now I’ve been tracked down, Michael and I will never be safe. When he finds me – which he will – then he finds all of us, and I will have put you, Grandad and the baby in danger. I could never forgive myself for that.

  It’s me he’s looking for, and because he is an evil man, who believes I betrayed him, he will not rest until he punishes me.

  Oh Ellen, you have been a wonderful friend to me, and so has Grandad Bob, and I hope that what I’m about to do will repay your kindness. The only option for me is to go away and leave my baby in your care, until such a time when, God willing, I may come home and hold my son in my arms again.

  He does not know whether I had the baby or not, so he won’t be looking for him; though if I take Michael with me, I know for sure I would be putting his life at risk.

  I know you will love him as I do, and I know you will care for him, and keep him safe. Tell him I’ll be back as soon as I think it’s safe.

  I have no idea where I’m going, but rest assured I will contact you as soon as I can.

  I love you like the sister I never had. Remember that always.

  Please let Grandad know I am okay, or he’ll worry and fret. You�
��ll think of something to tell him, I’m sure. Give him my love.

  God bless, and please try to understand. I am doing this because I don’t know any other way to keep us all from harm.

  If you think I’m wrong, then please forgive me.

  Maddy

  XX

  Going back upstairs, and carefully slipping the note under Ellen’s door, Maddy then returned to her own bedroom.

  Gazing down on her sleeping son, she was tempted to change her mind. But her deeper instinct told her she had to make this sacrifice, or risk him being discovered. Circumstances had forced her to make a choice, when really there was no choice at all.

  One last loving, lingering kiss, then with the tears burning her face, she collected her bag and walked away, leaving the bedroom door slightly open, so if he cried, Ellen was bound to hear.

  Quickly and silently she went down the stairs and out the front door. She dared not look back, afraid she might change her mind.

  Secure in the knowledge that she had done the right thing, she started running, slowly at first, then faster and faster until she thought her lungs would burst.

  The streets were eerily empty, her footsteps echoing against the flagstones like the patter of frantic fingers on a drumskin.

  She didn’t know which way to go; she followed no particular direction. There was no plan, but she had to keep running, away from the pain, and the child she had borne and whom she adored with every beat of her heart. And now the child was left behind, because of him.

  Loathing flooded her soul. One day… One day, if there was any justice in Heaven, he would suffer. Like she was suffering now.

  Emerging from Penny Street, she saw the National Express coach slow down at the traffic lights. Quickly now, she ran out and put up her arms for the driver to let her in.

  Astonished, he waited. The lights changed once, and then went back to red, and as she climbed on he told her gruffly, “What the devil are you playing at? It’s lucky for you there was no one behind me.”

  “Where are you headed?” Breathless, she clambered on, as the door closed behind her.

  “Last stop Bedford.” The lights changed and he moved forward.

  “Bedford? Where’s that?”

  “What!” Making headway, he threw her an impatient glance. “You’re not telling me you’ve got on the wrong coach, are you?”

  “No, no!” Maddy was quick to reassure him. “Only my friend has just moved to Bedford. I’m paying a surprise visit, and I’m not sure where exactly it is, or how far?”

  He laughed. “You women,” he tutted. “Absolutely hopeless! You shouldn’t be let out on your own – so disorganized it’s a wonder you manage to get across the street without help.” He cast her another ironic glance. “Bedford is in Bedfordshire – didn’t your friend tell you that? It’s a good six-hour trip. So, before we get there, I suggest you look in your bag and make sure you have her proper address.”

  “Oh, I have, and once I get there, I’ll have no trouble at all.”

  As she struggled along to a seat, she heard him muttering, “No trouble at all, eh? I wouldn’t bet on it!”

  There were four other passengers on the coach. “Do you have a ticket?” That was the dumpling woman in front.

  Maddy shook her head. “I thought you paid on the coach.”

  “Well, you can, and I expect the driver will take your fare when we make a stop. But it’s not regular, and it’s much easier if you get your ticket beforehand.” She bossily suggested Maddy should put her bag in the overhead locker. “There are several pick-ups on the way, and you won’t want folks stumbling over it, will you?”

  “No, thank you.” Maddy dutifully slung it overhead onto the shelf.

  “If you’d been on time at the coach station, the driver would have put it in the luggage compartment for you,” the woman fussed.

  Maddy thanked her again, and a short time later when the dumpling fell asleep, she sorted out the money in her purse. As soon as I’ve found a place to stay, I must change my bank account, she thought. She needed to draw money out, but even more importantly, she had to erase all avenues by which she might be traced.

  She thought about Ellen, and the shock she would get on waking, and her guilt was all-consuming. Yet, when she set it against having removed the threat from that cozy little house and everyone in it, the guilt seemed a worthwhile, albeit heavy price to pay.

  Slumped in her seat, she buried her face in her hands and quietly sobbed. One man! One dark-minded man hell-bent on destruction had done this to her. And in all her life she had never known such despair.

  When the other passengers fell asleep, she was made to evaluate her circumstances. She felt strange – isolated, and swamped by the enormity of what she had done. She did not recognize who she was any more. What was she doing? Where was she going? How could she have left her child back there?

  She shook herself mentally. The truth was, she had made herself a decoy. And how could she regret that?

  To her mind, this was the only way she could help keep her precious boy out of Drayton’s clutches. It was also the best way she might repay Ellen and Grandad Bob.

  “Ellen.” She murmured the name with affection. “I pray you will understand.”

  Having fallen asleep with Maddy on her mind, Ellen woke with a start. For a moment she felt disorientated, but then the nagging worries that had kept her awake till gone midnight came back to haunt her.

  “It must have been Steve’s man,” she murmured to herself. “It was too much of a coincidence that he should suddenly bump into Maddy like that.”

  Sliding out of bed, she made her way barefoot across the chilly lino. I didn’t pay enough attention to what she was saying, Ellen thought. No wonder she was worried out of her mind.

  When her foot trod hard on the piece of paper, she quickly snatched it up and unfolded it, her heart turning over as she skimmed through what Maddy had written.

  I have no idea where I’m going…

  I know you will love him as I do

  And I know you will care for him,

  and keep him safe…

  I will contact you as soon as I can.

  I love you like the sister I never had.

  Remember that always.

  “Oh, my God!” Dropping the note, she ran to Maddy’s room and pushed the door wide open; the crumpled covers thrown aside and that awful sense of emptiness, told their own story. “Oh, dear Lord! Maddy… what have you done!”

  She hurried to the cot, where the baby was snuffling, fast asleep, oblivious to the drama that was taking place around him.

  Running onto the landing and then down the stairs two at a time, Ellen checked every room. She even ran out into the street, glancing up and down, praying that Maddy was out here. Yet even as she looked, she knew deep down that her friend had gone. Maybe forever. And who could blame her? “Keep her safe, lord,” she mumbled, “keep her safe!”

  Maddy had written that note from the heart. She must have agonized for hours before she took such a hard decision. You tried to tell me, didn’t you? Ellen thought. But I fobbed you off, hoping I was right and you were wrong. I should have realized how afraid for us you were. I should have talked it through – made plans. I was a fool to think it was a chance encounter. Oh Maddy, I’m so sorry… so very sorry.

  Shivering, she came back into the house and closed the front door. As she made her way slowly up the stairs, her grandfather called out, “Is that you, love?”

  Swallowing hard, she tried to make her voice sound natural. “Yes, Grandad.”

  “Is everything all right, lass?”

  “Everything’s fine. I just went to the bathroom. Go back to sleep.”

  “What time is it?”

  “Time you stopped chattering, or you’ll be fit for nothing in the morning.”

  “Good night then, lass.”

  “Good night, Grandad.”

  Going into her own room, she cautiously switched on the main light and leaned
against the wall, where she read and reread Maddy’s every word.

  Afterward she walked round the room, the note clutched in her fist, her mind quickening with all manner of possibilities. Should she take little Michael and go after her? But where would she look? And how would she take best care of the baby? There must be a way, she thought. There must be a way of finding out where Maddy had gone.

  She sat down, then she stood up, and now she was on the prowl again. And with each and every plan she imagined, there were a dozen reasons why they would never work. Maddy wants to keep us safe, she reasoned. That’s why she took this drastic step. She knows if Drayton finds her, he’ll find us, and the boy. Oh, dear God!

  Thanks to Maddy’s courage, Ellen’s infatuation for Steve Drayton had come to an abrupt end when she became aware of his true nature. Thank God that evil man didn’t know about little Michael. Oh, but if he ever did! That possibility did not bear thinking about, because he would instinctively know that the worst way to make Maddy suffer would be to hurt her child.

  In the end, common sense prevailed, and Ellen had decided on her course of action. “All right, Maddy. I’ll do as you ask,” she promised. “I’ll take care of little Michael, and somehow, I’ll cover your tracks here.”

  She crept back into Maddy’s room and gazed down on the tiny boy. “Your mammy said she would stay in touch,” she whispered, “and I know she will. Meantime, you will have me and Grandad Bob to look after you.”

  Reaching down, she stroked his silky hair. “When the danger is over, your mammy will come back for you.” She thought of Maddy, of how loyal and loving she was, and how she had never asked to be put in such a frightening situation. “I promise you, Michael, your mammy won’t let us down. She loves you more than life itself, and she’ll be back for you one day.”