UI 101

by M. K. Claeys

  I did help Emma get ready for the ball, though, and I used all the hair tricks Ryn had taught me over the past four months, ending up with my little sixteen-year-old sister looking something like a twenty-year-old rock goddess. I thought she looked great, and so did she, as well as her date. As for my dad and Bobby, well, that was a different story, but they got over it. Some part of me often wondered if it were reasons like these that Bobby didn’t go away to college—because he wanted to keep an eye on us girls. But then again, Bobby had always marched to the beat of his own drum, and I think the closest he would get to med school would be to study veterinary medicine so that he would be able to take better care of our animals. I considered mentioning it to him later.

  Christmas break was going by in a flurry of happiness, and being back home and able to spend the daytime with my mama, helping her decorate the house, made it that much more festive to me. We blasted Christmas carols from the stereo and even went outside to cut down the fourteen-foot Christmas tree by ourselves. Okay, so Bobby was really the one who did all the sawing, but Mama and I picked the tree and we all helped carry it inside.

  Christmas shopping itself had come surprisingly easy to me this year, considering I had moved to a new town and started university. I’d had a lot of fun watching what everyone on campus was wearing and matching things to my siblings. I’d even found a store that would silkscreen things onto sweatshirts, so I’d had them make my papa one that said State Grad, Illington Dad. It was pretty much Illington coffee mugs, sweatshirts, and throw blankets all around, although I had picked up a book on His Excellency George Washington for myself.

  For Emma and Caroline, though, I’d have to give them our special sister gifts separately this year because I knew Papa, Bobby, and Mama wouldn’t approve of T-shirts that had a picture of Bucky’s antlers on the front and Nice Rack emblazoned across the back. Billy just wouldn’t get it, though, so he was safe to open them around. True, the shirts were a bit misogynistic, even a little demeaning, but I thought they were cute and really all in good fun. Besides which, ninety-five percent of the female population on campus had at least one, if not five in different colors. Rae was the most feminist person I knew, and she owned three and had also bought one for her own little sister.

  Just because I advocate the rights of women everywhere does not mean I can’t have a sense of humor. Right?

  I had given Jamaal his Christmas present before I’d left Illington, and he’d seemed genuinely pleased at the old-school flash drive mix of all my favorite artists, country and mainstream alike, which now included a lot of Dave Matthews—Rae and Jamaal both having gotten me hooked. I’d also gotten him posters of Martin Luther King Jr. and Abraham Lincoln that he could hang in his room. Much to my surprise, Jamaal had also gotten me a present, and I felt his was much more thoughtful than mine because I was sure he’d had to order it weeks in advance. It was a Detroit Tigers hat, issued from when they’d made it to the World Series of Baseball in 2006, along with a T-shirt with his favorite player’s number on it. I’d immediately put on the hat and worn the shirt when I’d left Illington to go back to Tennessee.

  The beginning of Christmas vacation went by quickly, what with all the decorating Mama and I had done each day, but I still left time every evening after dinner to talk with Jamaal. It turned into a thing where I would call him one night and he would call me the next. It was strange being away from all my friends who I was used to seeing every day, but I certainly wasn’t calling Rae and Ryn every night, although I did make an effort to contact them once a week. Jamaal and I had never had problems finding things to talk about when we were together, and it didn’t change when we were apart. There was always something on the news or ESPN that one of us would have seen, and we would chat about it. Jamaal didn’t have a very large family, being the middle child of three, but there was always fodder for entertainment as far as my large family went, like Billy trying to replant the Christmas tree because he didn’t want it to die from being cut down, so he thought that if he dumped a bucket of dirt around the trunk, it would continue to grow.

  So it was either Mama cursing to herself while she helped Billy vacuum up the mess or Emma being caught making out with her new boyfriend in the hayloft. Either way, I stayed well out of earshot when Mama went on her tirades. I never remembered her being so distraught over such little things before. There was a time when Billy’s tree-hugging plight would have made her weep with tears of laughter, not frustration, but I guess even my own mama isn’t immune to change.

  When Mama went into town, Bobby and I were left to fend for ourselves for lunch. I had gone to the store the night before and bought a case of Coke because having had it available to me every day at school, it was something I wasn’t able to live without any longer. I had become an addict—not to mention having gained five pounds, as the bathroom scale informed me. Mama didn’t generally approve of soda, so I didn’t care to drink it in front of her or Billy. She didn’t allow Billy to drink soda at all because the one time he did he bounced off the walls until two in the morning. So Bobby and I kept our little hoard to ourselves and drank them when we spent time together at night in one of our rooms or when Mama wasn’t home.

  “So how have things been at Illington, Mitz? Do you really like it there?”

  “Oh, I like it a lot! I mean, Tasha wasn’t exactly the easiest person to live with, but I’ve made some great friends that I know will be lifers.”

  “What do you mean Tasha ‘wasn’t’ the easiest person to live with?’”

  “Oh.” I blushed, my face turning as red as the tomato in my sandwich. “Yeah. About that.” I looked Bobby square in the eye and held out my pinky to him, asking him to pinky-swear that what I was going to tell him would be just between us.

  “I’ll swear, as long as you didn’t break any laws.”

  I giggled. “Do social mores count?”

  Bobby turned suddenly serious as he shook my pinky. “Depends on the more. Which one did you break?”

  “Nothing so bad,” I insisted. “I mean, I know it would just make Mama worry, so I don’t want her to know on account that she’s been so up in a bother lately.”

  “So you noticed too?”

  “Of course I did—she’s our mother! She looks heavier too. I think it’s stress.”

  “She’s not the only one who looks heavier,” Bobby interjected, but I knew it wasn’t to be mean.

  “I know I’ve gained some weight, but we can talk about that later.” He nodded. “Well, in a nutshell, you know how Tasha is, and I told you about that big argument that we had where I ended up sleeping in Rae and Ryn’s room, right?”

  “Yeah.”

  “Well, she’s still the same way, although she’d been sleeping over at L’Avery’s more often during the week, so I wasn’t seeing her as much. When we were in the same room though, well, I’m sure you can imagine the atmosphere. It felt like lightning was due to strike at any second.”

  “I can imagine.”

  “Right. So, well…”

  “Spit it out, Mitz.”

  “I had my friend sleep over and Tasha came back and saw him and blew a complete gasket.”

  “You had a friend, as in, a boyfriend sleep over?”

  “Yes.”

  “In your bed?”

  “Yes.”

  “With you in it?”

  “Yes, Bobby!”

  He sipped his Coke as calmly as ever, leaned back in his chair, adjusted his ever-present Callaway baseball cap (no one can accuse Bobby of not having a sense of humor), and finally spoke. “You used protection, didn’t you?”

  Now it was my turn to be flummoxed. I almost spit out my Coke, nearly knocked my chair over since I had been tilting it back on its hind legs—something Mama would have had a conniption over—and my Detroit Tigers baseball cap nearly fell off my head.

  “What? No! I mean, not no to what you said because I wouldn’t be that stupid, but no to, well, what you were thinking! Nothing happened! He
just slept over, and I mean, well, we kissed and stuff but totally nothing more than second base! And,” I added upon reflection, “I think that second base was just on accident from when he rolled over and put his arm around me in his sleep.”

  “Oh.” Bobby paused and seemed to search me with his eyes. It was as though he was debating whether he wanted to believe me.

  “Honest, I swear. And you know I would tell you, don’t you?”

  He smiled then. “Yeah. Yeah, I know you would. I’m sorry. What did she say when she went berserk?”

  “She said that Jay was an Uncle Tom and that I was an idiot if I couldn’t see that the only reason Jay was sleeping with me was because I was a whore. But Jay and I have never even slept together,” I added quickly. “I mean, I’ve never slept with anyone.”

  Bobby’s ears started turning red. I knew this meant he was getting angry. “Your roommate called you a whore?”

  “Yes.”

  There was silence after that. Neither of us spoke for quite some time.

  “Well?”

  “Well what?” I asked, bewildered.

  “Did you punch her?”

  “No! Of course not!”

  “Did what’s his name? Jay?”

  I shook my head. “L’Avery was there, and he grabbed Tasha and pulled her from the room. I could still hear her yelling down the hallway even after Jay shut the door.”

  “Smart man, this L’Avery guy, even if he is a bit of an idiot for dating someone kind of psycho,” Bobby commented bitterly.

  “Maybe. But as soon as they had come in and Tasha started yelling at me, Jay totally stood in front of me and put himself between me and her.”

  “He did?”

  “Mmm-hmm. And then after Tasha and L’Avery left, he helped me get dressed, like, grabbed clothes for me and stuff, not literally helped me,” I explained, “and put on my shoes. That he really did help me with because my hands were shaking so bad I couldn’t tie my laces. Then he packed up my bag with the books I’d need for the day and escorted me down to breakfast. We stayed in his room the rest of the day, and when he walked me back at the end of the night just to make sure Tasha had calmed down, all her stuff was gone. She’d completely left.”

  Bobby whistled. “So who’s this Jay boy I’m hearing so much about? Is he the one who’s been calling you every other day?”

  I smiled. “Yeah. I really like him, Bobby. He talks to me like I’m a real person, not just a set of breasts, and he is just as academically devoted as I am.”

  “Good. He seems nice enough, and I’m glad that he stepped up when you were threatened. That’s what really matters. Just be careful, okay, Mitz? I wouldn’t want you to get hurt. And if you do decide to, well, you know…keep yourself protected, okay?”

  “I know, Bobby. I am careful and I will be if we ever decide to be intimate. And that’s the thing with Jamaal—even if it were not to work out between us romantically, I know I would still want him there as a friend because he’s such a good one.”

  “A lifer?”

  “Yeah. A lifer.”

  Christmas morning came along with Mama’s traditional breakfast muffins. We had gone to midnight Mass in town the night before, so there was no need to get dressed and head to church, which was nice. Billy woke us all up at eight thirty and dragged us down to open our stockings before we woke Mama and Papa up at nine, when the preset timer on the oven went off, signaling the muffins were ready. Caroline and I buttered them and brought them into the sitting room with the Christmas tree, and everyone dug in while we opened presents.

  Mama adored the Illington throw blanket and coffee mug I had gotten her, and Papa immediately put his Illington sweatshirt on over his pajamas, which made me smile. It was so good to know that he supported me in my choice to go so far away to a school that wasn’t Tennessee State. Billy and Bobby played catch with the little Bucky stuffed animal I had gotten my youngest brother, and everyone enjoyed their Illington hoodies. Emma and Caroline had gotten me wool socks and had each knitted me a scarf and hat, and Billy, with the help of Mama, had painted a coffee mug for me to keep my pencils in on my desk.

  Bobby had gotten me a book on European history. I wanted to open it right away and lose myself in the ancient wars of history, but there were still more presents to be given and received.

  After everyone had opened their gifts, Emma, Caroline, and I were about to head upstairs to do our special sister gifts, but Mama and Papa called us all back down and passed us each a small gift wrapped in bright, gold and silver paper.

  “What are these, Mama?” asked Billy. “Santa already gave us our presents.”

  “These are from Mama and me. We had a little surprise for y’all and wanted to give you presents of our own this year.”

  Inside my little box was a pair of knitted booties. In Caroline’s was a rattle. Emma had a pacifier, Billy a bib, and Bobby a little white onesie. To break the tension, Bobby unzipped the onesie and attempted to stick his foot inside.

  “Sorry, Mama. Looks like we’re going to have to take it back and exchange sizes. This one’s not going to fit.”

  “Bobby, don’t be silly,” admonished Billy in the most serious voice I’d ever heard him use. “Those are for babies, not for adults.” He stopped for a moment and then seemed to realize what he had just said. “Mama, are you going to have another baby?”

  Our mother nodded, her eyes sparkling with tears. “Yes. Papa and I are pregnant, and so we’re all going to have a new member of our family around June.”

  “Golly, Mama, hasn’t anyone ever told you about birth control?” Bobby spat out and then immediately clapped a hand to his mouth, his ears bursting into flames.

  Fortunately, Mama laughed. “Yes, darling, although unfortunately they told me too late for you,” she joked, and Bobby turned even redder as we all laughed at his expense. “But this baby is something that your Papa and I have talked about for a long time, and finally we just decided that now was better than later. So, well, we’re going to have a baby.”

  “Boy or girl?” asked Caroline.

  “No!” shrieked Emma. “Don’t tell! I want it to be a surprise!”

  “All right, Emma,” said Papa jovially. “We hadn’t found out yet, but if everyone wants it to be a surprise, we’ll make it a surprise.”

  We voted. Surprise was unanimous.

  “What about names?” I asked. “Have you thought about it?”

  “I want to name him!” piped in Billy.

  “Your mother and I thought that we would leave it up to y’all. You can pick a boy’s name and a girl’s name and we’ll approve them, of course, but the naming will be up to you. I know you won’t pick something awful, and we want y’all to be as much a part of this as we are, okay?”

  We agreed, and everyone carried their Christmas booty up to their rooms while Mama and Papa gathered up any pieces of wrapping paper that had missed the garbage bag. It wasn’t long after Emma, Caroline, and I had done our own sisterly gift exchange that Bobby and Billy knocked on my door and came and sat on the bed with us.

  “So Mama’s going to have another baby,” Emma said softly. “Pretty amazing, huh?”

  “Amazing?” giggled Caroline. “I’m thinking more like crazy! We’re finally all old enough to take care of ourselves, and yet she and Papa want to bring in a brand-new life that will need them twenty-four-seven. I mean, Mama is, like, forty! It’s going to be a lot of work for all of us, especially since new Baby Callaway will be coming right at the height of touring season.”

  “Yeah, but I’ll be home from school then,” I pointed out. “So all three of us can do the inside stuff, and Bobby can help Billy learn how to do the outside in addition to just the passageways. And it would actually be really good for the tour to dress up the baby in old-world clothes. All the women who come will just think it’s so adorable. We could even work in nursery stuff and infant care into the tour.”

  “What about names, though?” asked Billy. “We have to dec
ide together, and Mitzy’s leaving soon to go back to Illington. I like Jake.”

  I went over to my desk, grabbed my philosophy notebook, and began taking down names, reserving the left side of the paper for girls and the right side for boys. We ended up with twenty-something names on either list and then narrowed it down to five each. In the end, we decided on Xavier Jeffrey—the middle name after my papa—and Cadence Grace.

  Bobby drove me back to Aunty Jo’s the last day of vacation and let me know he’d left another special surprise inside my bags for me and my friends. It would be a great way to start off the new semester. Now it was only a matter of time before school was done and I was home and my new brother or sister arrived.

  It was bound to be an exciting new year!

  16

  Auraelia

  So I was back in my wonderful Illington, and the sight of all my friends was more than I needed to keep me distracted from the shock of how cold it was and that I was seeing snow on the ground again and frost on the treetops. I had gotten back early enough that I had sufficient time to chill with Ryn, Mitzy, and Paul before I headed over to Brad’s for the night. I was nice and tan from being back in Evansdale for break, and Brad definitely noticed.

  “Well, aren’t you looking even more gorgeous than usual?” he asked, spinning me around so he could take in the full package. “So what happened over break? Everyone jealous of how you skipped town for four months?”

  “Um, not exactly,” I said, slipping my Birkenstocks off at the door. “Mostly they think that anyone who leaves should just never come back.” I smiled to myself, remembering with supreme clarity the stunned look on Dave Baxter’s face as an entire cup of Bud Light dripped down it. “But I guess on the whole it wasn’t too bad.”

  “Well, the sun certainly agreed with you, even if the townsfolk didn’t,” Brad assured me. “I forgot how hot my little Illington girl was while I was away.”

  I blushed. “Thanks, Brad. You’re looking really good yourself. I take it you didn’t have problems with the townsfolk then?”