Karley's Surrender

by Christin Lovell

  “Told you.”

  “Thank you, Annabelle. That was better than last time,” the host offered, though his face was still cringing. “Next up is well known for his deep croons, singing Scotty McCreery, here’s Luke Travis.” The crowd cheered.

  “He’s good,” Suzie said, clapping along with the others. And he was.

  “You can serenade me anytime, Luke,” Jessica said with a wink as he walked by.

  “Thanks, sugar.” He tossed her a charming smile on his way to the bar.

  A group of girls were next, all of which were intoxicated, slurring the words and completely tone deaf. The next guy wasn’t much better, though I could tell from the rowdy group of guys opposite us, it had been a dare. Another country Barbie followed him and for the first time I had to plug my ears, as did many others.

  “Well then, that was… well, that was interesting,” the host said, taking the mic again. “Let’s hope our next act is a bit better.” He looked down at his sheet. “Well, it says here we have a new singer tonight, and she’ll be joined by two back-up singers. Please welcome for the first time to the stage Karley Garcia and her friends, Suzie and Jessica.” I immediately sobered at the sound of my name.

  Chapter 3

  My jaw dropped as I turned to Suzie. She jumped up, throwing her hands into the air. “Woo-hoo! Let’s go girl.” She grabbed my hand and tried to pull me from my seat. My heart took off and my nerves were shot to hell. I wouldn’t budge. Jessica took hold of my other hand, but I leaned away from them shaking my head.

  “Oh God. I can’t believe you. I’m never coming out with you again.”

  “You’ll get over it. Besides, you can’t be any worse than the last girl. It’ll be real fun. Me and Jess will be beside you.”

  “Remember, tonight is about letting loose and having fun, Karley,” Jessica coerced. I felt the color draining from my face. My stomach churned, my head pounded; I wanted to pass out.

  “Come on up, ladies,” the host said. The crowd cheered us on; a couple behind us tried to help Jess and Suzie convince me.

  “Someone get the girl a shot!” a guy yelled.

  “Yes!” Suzie agreed, dropping my hand. I quickly covered my face, groaning into my hand.

  Suzie returned with two shots right as the crowd started chanting my name. The night couldn’t get any worse. I was about to be forced into mortifying myself. I chased the first shot immediately with the second shot. Heat raced through my veins; after all I’d drank, I was surprised I wasn’t flat on my face. It did what I needed it to though: temporarily squashed my insecurities.

  “You ready?” Suzie was beaming with excitement. I wanted to punch her.

  “As ready as I’ll ever be,” I sighed. I stood up, swallowing the lump in my throat. Jessica and Suzie nearly dragged me towards the stage, everyone clapping behind us. “Uh, this is probably a bad time to ask what song I’m supposed to sing.”

  “Cowboy Casanova by Carrie Underwood.” Suzie passed me a mic, letting go of my hand. Thank God I at least knew the song. Jess patted me on the shoulder as she took her mic.

  I looked out at the crowd, the bright lights only making me sweat more. “Uh, hi everyone. Ahead of time, I’m sorry if I totally bomb this.”

  I closed my eyes and said a little prayer. I wasn’t asking for suddenly amazing vocal cords; I was just asking for the strength to make it through it.

  “You’ve got this, honey,” Suzie said, giving me a small hug from the side. I nodded my head. Was it too late to ask how I’d gotten myself into this?

  The music started, an edgy beat that filled the space. I’d forgotten how catchy this song was. I caught Jessica and Suzie dancing beside me. I laughed, feeling my nerves calming. This was about me letting go of myself, of the past for one night. I needed to give it an honest effort. And it was true. I couldn’t be any worse than several performers had been.

  “You better take it from me, that boy is like a disease,” I began. The crowd encouraged me. I sunk into the song. By the chorus I was swinging my hips as enthusiastically as my friends; by the end I was belting out the tune with full gusto.

  The second the song ended, both girls squeezed me between them as the crowd erupted around us. Whistles sung through the air. They pulled away only to leap off the stage and clap with the crowd. I felt all the heat that had spread through my body head straight to my cheeks. I looked down, smiling sheepishly. I wished I was hiding in a corner somewhere, not being the center of everyone’s attention.

  “Give it up for our newest country star!” the host shouted. My eyes shot open at him. I immediately shook my head ‘no’ and made a beeline for the stage stairs. “Well, folks, that’s a damn tough act to follow, but it seems we have a few who are goin’ to try.”

  “Oh my God. Who the hell would have thought you had all that voice inside you?” Suzie greeted, pulling me in for another hug. “I’m so proud of you.”

  “Great job, Karley,” a middle-aged woman smiled.

  “That was awesome,” another added.

  “Damn fine singin’,” a man jumped in.

  “Hell yeah. I’d buy your album,” the young guy beside him said, winking as I passed.

  “Um, thanks.” I imagined my cheeks were crimson by now.

  “How did it feel to let loose?” Jessica probed as we walked back to our table.

  “Terrifying. Never do that to me again, please.”

  “Honey, now that we know you can sing like that, people will be signing you up without my help,” Suzie said.

  “Ugh. I need another drink.” I frowned just at the thought of going through that again. Granted, it felt good during, but I was bordering a panic attack before and no less comfortable after.

  “I’ll go get you one,” Suzie offered.

  “No, thanks. I need a minute, if you don’t mind.”

  She nodded. “Sure, honey.”

  I walked over to the bar, thankful when I found a gap in the crowd.

  “Great singing, Karley. You better come back and serenade us again,” the woman beside me said.

  “Thanks.”

  “What can I get for our newest karaoke star?” Joe, the bartender, asked.

  “What’s good?”

  “Not much of a drinker?” He smiled. I shook my head. “In that case, I would say go with something simple like a rum and coke.

  “Sounds good, thanks.”

  “Three bucks,” he said.

  Before I could put my five down on the counter, a tanned hand slapped one down for me. I knew my mouth fell open as my eyes traveled up the arm to a pair of green eyes.

  “I got it.” The slight baritone to his voice sent chills down my spine and heat to my center. My pulse sped up as I stared into the depths of him. A satisfied smile broke out on his face as he pulled away.

  I shook my head, returning my attention to the bar. “Uh, thanks.”

  “Anytime. I’m just glad I don’t have blue eyes.”

  “Why?”

  “After hearing you sing that song, you might not take kindly to blue-eyed strangers.” His lips lifted at the corners, but his eyes darkened, eliciting more from his words.

  “Oh.” I blushed, feeling stupid. Here was a handsome bachelor trying to talk to me on a friendly level and I was falling over my tongue while my brain took a break.

  “You got a set of pipes on you.”

  “Thanks.”

  “Sorry for the wait. Here’s your drink, Karley.” Joe slid the drink in front of me before quickly returning to the line of other patrons eager to order

  I picked up my drink and took a sip. It was smooth. “Um, thanks for the drink –“ I scrunched my brows realizing I didn’t know his name.

  “Shane.” He stuck out his hand. I shifted my drink to my left hand and shook his outstretched right.

  “Thanks, Shane.” His name came out like a breathless whisper. Oh God. Bury me in the coffin now.

  “Anytime, Karley.” His eyes burned into me. The way he said my name made m
e weak in the knees. I needed to escape this man as soon as possible. I tried to pull back my hand, but he wouldn’t let go. Instead he twisted it and brought the back of my hand to his lips. My skin tingled beneath the heat of his kiss. I was just short of panting as I sank in his move. The moment he winked at me, my eyes widen. I struggled to swallow past the lump in my throat, squeezing my thick thighs tighter together.

  The second he released my hand I immediately turned and headed straight back to a gaping Suzie and Jessica.

  “Not a word,” I ordered, putting up a silencing hand before Suzie could start in on me.

  Chapter 4

  I jumped up and out of bed at the pounding of a fist on my front door. I groaned, pressing my fingers to my temples; my head feeling like it was about to explode.

  “I’m coming!” I grumbled, trying not to run into any walls on my way to the door.

  I threw open the front door, immediately closing my eyes to the bright morning sun as the August heat hit me.

  “Oh my God, Karley. You’re a town celebrity!” Suzie squealed as she walked past me. I closed the door, and slowly re-opened my eyes. She was dressed in workout shorts, a sports bra and tennis shoes with a huge smile plastered on her face.

  “What are you talking about it?” I headed towards the kitchen, in need of some caffeine.

  “Here.” She threw one of the many copies of the newspaper she held beneath her left arm at me.

  I caught it and unfolded it. My breath caught. Oh God. This can’t be happening. I opened the paper until the entire front page was visible. “Oh my God.” Dread washed through me. My head throbbed as I stared, open mouthed, at the huge front page photo of me singing.

  As if seeing the mammoth size of my hips and thighs next to Suzie and Jessica in black and white wasn’t bad enough, I had one flabby arm thrown in the air, while the other held tightly to the mic. My mouth was open, belting out some note, and my left hip was pushed out towards the front, mid shake.

  “Oh my god. Oh my…” I stared wordlessly at the photo, unable to get beyond how awful I looked. I was huge. The swell of my stomach made me look like I was pregnant; the size of my hips only emphasized my child rearing abilities. Despite my feet being apart, my thighs were still squished together. My hair was a wanton mess around my face, my eyes squished by my cheeks since my mouth was open, and I had a major double chin due to that fact too.

  I threw my hands over my face, trying to calm my erratic breathing. “I can’t believe this is happening. I… it… Oh god.” Tears stung my eyes as I roughly ran my hands up and down my face, as if I could scrub away what was happening.

  “You look great!” Suzie exclaimed. “You look like a sexy burlesque dancer. All you’re missing is the dress. I’m framing this puppy and putting it in the store.”

  “No!” I yelled, my hands flying frantically in a negative connotation. She’d set the stack of papers on the kitchen table and was holding out the front page at a distance to admire it. “You can’t do that to me, Suzie. Please, if you’re my friend, you won’t do it.”

  “What? Honey, you look fabulous. This is the best I’ve seen you in years, not to mention, the only picture I have of you.”

  “What on earth were Pam and Walter thinking printing this on the front cover? Wasn’t there anything more exciting going on in our small town last night?”

  “Apparently not, although Shane chatting you up at the bar did make the rounds.”

  “Ugh. I’m not going in today. I can’t face all those people. And the questions. God, they’re going to grill me.”

  “Oh, but you have to come in! I’m counting on all those gossip hungry women buying books just to talk to you.”

  “Really, Suzie?” I scoffed.

  “I’ll pay you double today.”

  “You fight dirty.” I narrowed my eyes at her.

  “So does that mean you’re coming in?” She smiled hopefully.

  “Yes. You know I couldn’t turn away the money.” I needed as much as I could get if I ever planned to move away from the past that haunted me here.

  “Yay! See you in an hour then. Keep that copy of the paper. The article is pretty good if you can stomach it.” She gathered the stack of papers and headed out, leaving me to sulk.

  The day was worse than I imagined possible. There was a steady line of customers all day and every single one of them asked me about last night. My feet were aching and my stomach was growling since we didn’t get to take a break. I was only given my customary five minutes at 2 p.m.

  “Ooh, honey!” Suzie beamed as she walked over to the register. “This is the best day I’ve had since I opened the store ten years ago. You need to make headlines more often.” She winked, setting down the sales report she’d just printed.

  “Today was torture. I like hiding in my little rabbit hole. I like blending in, not standing out.”

  “Karley, sweetie, one day you’ll know just how special you are. And while I’m pretty sure it will take a man like Shane to point it out, I’m anxious for the day to come. You really need to stop wasting your life away behind closed doors.”

  I looked at the solemnness in her eyes. I knew she was speaking the truth, but I wasn’t comfortable enough, confident enough, in myself to accept it, especially given my past.

  We both turned at the bell over the front door jingling. My breath caught in my throat at the sight of Shane.

  “Hello, ladies.” He smiled, tipping his cowboy hat. I didn’t think it was possible for him to look any sexier than last night, but the hat did it.

  “Hi. I don’t believe we were properly introduced. I’m Suzie.” She stuck out her hand.

  He shook her hand politely. “Shane. It’s nice to meet you, Suzie.” There was twinkle of something in his eye when he looked at her. I couldn’t identify it, but I certainly didn’t take it as good. I took it as he was definitely interested in her, which was probably why he tried to talk to me in the first place.

  “So, Shane, what can we help you find?” Suzie asked, withdrawing her hand.

  I decided to go straighten the shelves. The customers had done more than dive into my personal life today; they’d destroyed the store.

  “I’ll be in the back if you need me,” I said, walking past them. Suzie nodded.

  “Let’s cut to the chase, Shane. Are you interested in my girl or what?” Suzie pressed. I stopped mid-step and turned back to her, blushing profusely.

  “Suzie,” I gasped. She flicked her wrist dismissively. I’d never been more humiliated. I’d rather sing a hundred karaoke songs alone than to be witness to the massacre that I was certain was about to happen.

  “Uh, well” - he ran his hand up and down the back of his neck –“I was actually coming to see if she wanted to grab dinner.”

  They both turned to me expectantly. Suzie was giving me an eager look; her eyes bulging with excitement, her lips twisted up. Shane peered at me beneath the rim of his hat. His green eyes stared into the depths of me; it was as if he was breeching my barrier, my carefully constructed wall of protection.

  “I, uh… I’m not really hungry.” Suzie immediately frowned while Shane furrowed his brows. I was just about to walk away when my stomach growled. It was loud enough to echo through the book store. I bit my lower lip, and avoided looking at them.

  I heard Shane burst out into laughter. I cast a wary glance his way. Suzie was glowering at me.

  “Give us just a minute, Shane,” she said, grabbing my hand and dragging me towards the back room. She closed the office door behind us. She let go of me and leveled me with an angry glare. The moment her hands rested on her hips, I knew I was in trouble. “What is wrong with you? A hot, no, sexy, living, breathing hunk of a cowboy just asked you to dinner and you flat out lied to him to get out of it? I can’t believe you, Karley.”

  I shrugged, dropping into a chair. I was trying to shut down, trying to pull away from the situation; close my mind off to the possibilities.

  “Oh, no you don’t! Do
n’t you dare put up that wall of yours. Now I’ve been very patient with you; I’ve handled you with kid gloves these last seven years, but they’re coming off today. Why the hell won’t you go out with him?”

  I stared at her desk, littered with papers. I was staring at whatever I had to to avoid opening my eyes to the truth. She slid a pile of reports over and sat on the desk.

  “Talk to me, honey.” Her voice was calm, soothing. It reminded me of my mother’s.

  “I’m scared. I can barely stand to look at myself in the mirror, let alone expect a man to look at me every day for the rest of his life.”

  Her hand slid beneath my chin, drawing my face upwards to look at her. “Honey, what happened is not your fault. You need to stop blaming yourself. There was nothing you could have done. And no man is gonna blame you for it either.”

  My carefully concocted façade began to crumble. I shook my head, fighting the inevitable breakdown. I refused to let it happen here or in front of anyone.

  “Now, you worked hard today. If nothing else, you deserve a free dinner.” She lightly shook my chin, before letting go and hopping down off the desk.

  I chuckled. “I guess. I mean, how bad could it be, right?”

  “Atta girl!”

  I clocked out, grabbed my purse and headed towards the front of the store. I found Shane browsing the mystery section. His backside was a force to be reckoned with. Powerful shoulders led to narrow hips and a taut rear. At least I could say I went out with a sexy cowboy once in my life.

  I was about to speak when he turned and smiled. The wind was knocked out of me as my heart began to race. Dear God, the way this man affected me.

  “I’m hopin’ you changed your mind.” I nodded, not trusting myself to speak. “Great. I figured I’d take you to Randy’s Steakhouse. That sound okay?” I shook my head. He held the front door open for me. I turned back.

  Suzie waved. “Have fun y’all.” I slightly lifted my hand, too stunned to fully return the gesture.

  Why on earth did I agree to this?

  Chapter 5

  I took a sip of my sweet tea. I was jumpier than a virgin on her wedding night. I’d never been out as friends with a male before, let alone out on a date. I was a tightly rolled ball of anxiety set to explode with the tiniest of set-offs.