Broken Survivor

by Jennifer Labelle

  “No, thank God. You?”

  “Uh-uhn, It’s just not like him to be this quiet is all, but I guess we should just count our blessings because it’s so much more peaceful this way.”

  Her visits with Chrystal were not nearly often enough. But on the odd occasion when they were given the chance to spend some quality time together, Holly tried to make the most of it. They were getting along better than they had in years, and in a way they were all each other had.

  Even with distance.

  Chapter Seven

  Speak of the devil…

  “I need you to go back to class and pack your things as soon as possible. There is no telling how close he is right now.”

  “Wait, what are you talking about? Who’s close?” Holly was confused. She had been called out of class to take a phone call at the office, and Lauren wasn’t making any sense. She was anxious, and in her attempt to explain, she spoke too fast and was barely understandable.

  “Your father, Holly. He tried to manipulate me out of some money, and when I refused to give in, he threatened me and then said he was going to kidnap you. He sounds pretty desperate, and for all I know, he is already on his way right now. I don’t trust him. You have to leave as soon as possible. So sign out and get your things. Charlotte’s coming to pick you up.”

  Christian was up to his old tricks again. When he got like this, it usually meant one of two things: he either needed money for a hit or to save his own ass. He would mess with the wrong type of people sometimes, getting fronted things knowing full and well that he would never pay for them.

  “Okay, where am I going with her?” Hey, it was a day off from school, who was she to complain? The house would be empty right now, but she highly doubted Lauren meant for her to go there.

  “Her house. Charlotte’s got your old room ready. I want you to stay there until I send someone to pick you up. I won’t risk you coming back until I know it’s safe. I’ve already called the police to issue a formal complaint, and they’re looking for him. Now I’ve gotta get back to work. Try to hurry, and call me as soon as you get there so that I know that you’ve arrived safely.”

  Good ol’ Dad. Thanks to his dramatic episodes and random acts of violence, she’d ended up staying with Charlotte for three days before he was arrested again for possession, assault on an officer, and making threats and Lauren felt it was safe for Holly to return.

  ***

  The sunlight shone on the big silver-and-gold bird in front, each wing tip a separate decal fitted to the fenders with perfection. The car was as black as night with T-tops and tinted windows. The original honeycomb rims sparkled and itched to be driven hard. Something about this Trans Am called to her, but who did it belong to? She needed to thank Lauren for this later, because whomever she’d sent to pick her up had a really nice ride.

  “I’m a little early.” He smiled after she jumped at the sound of his voice. She guessed he’d been watching her admire his car for the last few minutes, and he seemed to approve of her appraisal. “There is nothing sexier than a woman who appreciates a good muscle car.” He winked. “Sorry, but since you’ve yet to call me, I thought I’d come pick you up a couple hours early so we could hang out.” He shrugged and waited for her to say something, but when she didn’t answer right away, he continued, “Lauren asked me to come get you, and I plan on bringing you back safely, so no worries. It’s such a nice day, and I figured why not enjoy it? Are you with me?”

  “What did she tell you, exactly?” Her father’s behavior was embarrassing enough without having it broadcast. She trusted Lauren but still didn’t want people she didn’t know very well to know about her dysfunctional life. That was off-limits.

  “About what?”

  “This.” She gestured back and forth between them. “About coming to get me. Did she tell you why I’ve been here for the last three days?”

  “Not really. She just asked me to pick you up as a favor, and I took it as an opportunity to see you again. Besides, I figured it was none of my business.” He shrugged. “Why, is there anything wrong?”

  She liked Zander, and for the first time in a long time cared what somebody else thought of her, cared what he thought in particular. “Not anymore.” She took a deep breath. “Look, I’m sorry. I’ve been jumpy and withdrawn lately, and I don’t mean to take it out on you. Can we start over?” His sweetness is dangerous, Hol. You can give it a shot with him, but be careful.

  “I’d like that. Shall we?” His hand lightly pressed against her lower back and he guided her toward his car.

  “We shall,” she said excitedly and ran her hands along the firebird decals toward the back of the car. “Really nice ride, by the way. What year is she?”

  “Nineteen-eighty.” He laughed. “And I love that you have such great taste. I spent a lot of hours rebuilding and restoring my car. It’s nice to know that it’s appreciated by more than just me.”

  She shrugged, trying to hide her blush. “A car like this should be appreciated.”

  ***

  Holly sighed, feeling content for the first time in a long time. The three-fifty engine roared to life and vibrated. The rumble of power that made this muscle car so great had her wanting him to take the scenic route to wherever this little ride together took them.

  “Hey, this isn’t Lauren’s place.” All too fast, the car slowed and she became curious.

  “I did say I picked you up early for a reason, Holly. I’ll take you home soon enough, but we’re going to hang out first. Come on, when was the last time you had some fun?”

  She smiled. Fun, was he serious? It had been so long since she had any, she didn’t know the meaning of the word anymore. “Fun, you say? All right, I’m game. What do you have in mind?”

  Zander reached into the backseat and pulled out a basket of goodies. He shrugged innocently when she arched a brow. “What can I say, I have a mother who spoils me rotten. Lunch?”

  “Moms certainly are great for that. I was spoiled rotten once too, you know, and I totally envy you right now, by the way.”

  “Sorry.” His smile faded. “I didn’t mean to insensitive. Do you want to talk about it?”

  “No, not at all.” She smiled shyly. “Talking about what happened to my mother is not a happy subject, and unless you want to see me cry, I suggest we not go there. Besides, I thought you promised me some fun. I could use some good times.”

  “Well then, let’s let the good times roll, shall we?”

  The park’s trails were booming with cyclists and backpackers. Wilderness surrounded them with hardwood, mixed forests, fields, swamps, and lakes interspersed among the mountains. What was beautiful and green in the summer was breathtaking in the fall in a rainbow of colors.

  “Oh my God, would you look at that?” Holly said, gesturing to the foliage as they settled in a spot close to Meech Lake to picnic.

  “Beautiful, isn’t it?” Zander looked up. A nest of robins was nestled on a low branch only a few feet away, which gave them a perfect view of the mother feeding her young.

  “It’s awesome,” she replied. “What a view we have out here. Do you come here often?” A city girl, she’d lived in Ottawa her entire life, but she really appreciated the serene atmosphere. It was a nice change.

  “Not really.” He shrugged, breaking eye contact as he emptied the basket. “It was just a good place to go to for a picnic.”

  “A modest one, are you?” Holly reached for a sandwich and winked. “This place is great, Zander, thanks for sharing this with me.”

  They ate, talked, and laughed the day away. Lying on a blanket next to him, she was relaxed and felt at peace for the first time in a long time. He listened to everything she had to say, joked around with her, and the atmosphere around them was so serene. “Are you ready?”

  “For what?”

  “Fun.” He stood to help her up. Reaching out, he placed both of her hands inside of his and pulled. Her chest rubbed against his, their bodies molding together as if
they were made to fit perfectly, and for a split second she forgot where they were. Nothing mattered. Entranced in the moment, she could feel his breath hitch as he looked right into her eyes. He leaned forward to brush his lips against hers, and before anything could get good, the moment was ruined. “Ouch!” she said and rubbed the side of her head.

  He stepped back, startled. “Are you all right?” And then he laughed once he realized what had happened.

  She crouched down and picked up the offending Frisbee and handed it back to the adorable little boy coming to retrieve it. They watched him run back to play with his father again. “Just peachy, thanks.” It was just her luck to be the only one there to get a Frisbee to the head, but then again, the kid had saved her from that inevitable kiss, so maybe she should thank him. Zander was great, but she still fought the attraction, knowing he deserved better than someone like her, no matter how tempting he was.

  “Here let me have a look.” He moved closer and then shocked her when he kissed it all better. Hot breath and smooth lips sent butterflies of excitement fluttering inside her belly. She stepped back, half in shock and half reeling from desire, and turned to help him pack up so he couldn’t see her blush right to her roots.

  He put his arm around her while they backtracked to his car, and she breathed in a sigh of relief once it came into sight again. “So what’s the plan now?”

  “Some more fun,” he repeated, smiling. “You love the car, right?” She nodded in response. “Well then, let’s ride.”

  His devilish smile mimicked her own once she got back in, and he laughed when she gripped the door handle the moment he put the pedal to the metal and sped off.

  “Woohoo!” she squealed, allowing the high of the ride to pump her adrenaline while the scenery became a blur behind them, and she finally let go. For those few moments he actually brought not only excitement into her life but a glimpse of carefree peacefulness. It was great.

  ***

  Blood, there was blood everywhere.

  Oh Lord, not again. It had been a while since her last nightmare, but they still scared the shit out of her, and it was extremely hard to fight them. These sudden images haunted her every move as though she was back there and helpless again.

  Her blonde hair turned red and matted toward the top of her head like a gory halo as she lay on the kitchen floor. Eyes wide but unseeing with the stare of death, a lifeless blue, and bloodshot, red where the white was supposed to be. A mouth gapped open as if in shock while blood poured from her gums and out the side of her mouth. What had he done, and why?

  There was another flash, like a strobe light of memories from the most horrible night of her life.

  Her neck was full of dark blood, red from being slashed and vulnerable. Flesh separated, and her insides now exposed to the elements had just finished spraying their last bit of liquid to join the pool that surrounded her body on the floor as a little more splatter landed on the wall.

  Flash…

  Her shirt clung to her barely-there curves where the splatter attempted to dry. The fingers on her left hand hung by just a sliver of skin, some even cut off. Her disabled right hand was slashed but stayed clenched into a tight fist. And by that, it was clear that she’d fought to survive but lost.

  No!

  Flash…

  “Mom?” Holly pleaded, “No, Mom, no. Wake up. Don’t leave me.” Her pleas fell on deaf ears. She watched from the sidelines and saw herself lower to her knees and beg. “Mom!” she screamed when nothing else worked. The unseeing, dead eyes flickered. Blood spurted from her mother’s shocked mouth once more, and the almost-decapitated head turned to look at her.

  “Holly, help me…” It was her mother’s voice. She had come back to her.

  “Mom?” Holly whimpered. “I’m so sorry. I was too late.”

  She was being pulled away, forced to leave unwillingly. She’d lived a nightmare, was living a nightmare, but Emma had come back to her briefly. She still had to tell her that she was sorry, that she loved her, and still had to beg for forgiveness for starting the fight that night Clay had killed her. “No!” she screamed, struggling. “Mom, don’t leave me again. I’m sorry, please, I’m so sorry.” She reached out desperately to find nothing she could hold on to and sobbed into her pillow.

  Lauren must have heard her cries, because reality struck when Holly felt small arms wrap tightly around her. She’d been dreaming again, screaming out for real, as horrific images of Emma’s lifeless body branded her brain for the rest of her life.

  “Shh, Holly,” she cooed. “I’m here. It’ll be alright.”

  Holly was too distraught to reply. These dreams had come frequently in the beginning, and she hoped she’d seen the last of them. That was doubtful, but despite the odds, hope still flickered inside her.

  ***

  Zander

  Her long, dark hair hung loosely over her shoulders, the layers accentuating her oval face. He hadn’t noticed until then how green her eyes were as they sparkled brightly. She bit into her full, pouty bottom lip, looking unsure of herself.

  “You nervous?” He smiled. They’d been hanging out for a few weeks now, and he enjoyed every minute of it. Holly was pretty cool, but she had no idea how appealing she was. He knew very little of her past other than that her mother had been murdered. That would have been hard to miss when it was on the news morning, noon, and night for the first few weeks after it happened. He couldn’t imagine what she’d been through, didn’t want to.

  “A little bit,” she admitted, leaning against the driver’s-side door. “I’ve never done this before.”

  “It’s not like you have to drive a stick.” He laughed. “Come on, I’ll be right there with you. Live a little.”

  “All right.” She shrugged. “But don’t say I didn’t warn you. I mean, I’d feel horrible if I crashed it or something.”

  “You’re not going to crash. Look, if you’re not comfortable driving, then we’ll just forget it, all right? No pressure.”

  She hesitated, and he groaned before he approached her. His body was so close that he could feel her heat against him. He couldn’t resist touching her. His thumb grazed her bottom lip, while he reminded himself that he’d promised to be good when all he wanted was a little taste. Her lips tempted him to take a nibble, to trace them with his tongue and coax her mouth open to show how good it could be. She was driving him crazy.

  “Fine, let’s do this.” She took a step to the side, interrupting his thought process. He wondered how she could be so immune to the attraction between them when he knew she felt the same way. She had trust issues, that was pretty obvious, but why? He’d treated her well and always would. He’d been brought up that way.

  He raised a brow and gave her a cocky grin when he noticed her biting that bottom lip again. She was nervous, and he had a feeling that this afternoon would be a lot of laughs—for him anyway.

  “After you.” He shut the driver’s-side door when she was secure and whistled on his way to the passenger side. Holly had admired his car from the start, and now he planned to let her really experience the ride. She was driving and looking adorably nervous at the moment. “Start the car and then push on the gas pedal, Holly.”

  “I am.”

  He shook his head, amazed at how overly cautious she was being. “Come on, I can walk faster than this. Why don’t you pull into that spot over there and I’ll help you out?”

  “And how do you suppose you’ll do that?” She checked the mirrors to make sure she had enough room to turn around, then panicked when Zander shouted, “Watch the curb!”

  She pressed on the gas instead of the break in her haste, and the Trans Am hurled forward and onto an island with a patch of grass. The front end just missed crashing into a light pole when she slammed on the brakes. They both jerked forward, and with shaking hands he reached forward to take the keys out.

  “Don’t ever do that to me again,” she snapped. “You scared the crap out of me. I had plenty of room and wa
s going slow enough to avoid crashing until you started yelling at me. Geez.”

  “Are you serious?” He couldn’t believe it. “You were about to hit that curb, and if you didn’t want me to react, then you should have been more careful.”

  “Look, can we just drop it? Clearly we disagree, and I don’t want to argue with you.” She blew out a frustrated breath. “I’m sorry I almost crashed your car. Even though I wouldn’t have if you hadn’t yelled at me.” She smiled wickedly as she said the last part quickly, but before he could rebut, she was out of the car and leaning against the post in front of it.

  He stayed quiet in the meantime, slowly backed the Trans Am off the curb, and parked right in front of her. He opened the door and sat there waiting.

  “What are you doing?” She looked uncomfortable and unsure. Beautiful, he thought again and smiled when she started to fidget.

  She screeched and then laughed when he yanked her forward and pulled her into the car on top of him. Adjusting his seat back so they’d both fit, he placed her facing forward on his lap. “What we’re doing is learning to drive, babe, and since you’re too nervous on your own, I’m going to show you this way before my car becomes a complete wreck.” Thank God she only landed on the curb and missed the light post. No harm done. But he wasn’t taking any chances. He placed his hands on top of hers until he knew she was comfortable enough to steer and then worked the gas and breaks for her as they drove together in the vacant lot.