Three weeks pass and it’s much of the same. On days Brandon is absent, I’ve been given the task of managing the office; and it’s those days, like clockwork, that Dawn not only delivers us all food, but stays and eats with me. There's nothing I can do about her staying either, since she’s Brandon’s niece. That alone keeps me from being rude to her, but it's damn hard since every time she’s near I can’t help but wonder what it'd be like to have her. And every night after she stays to eat, I have dreams of all the different ways I'd like to take her. Those dreams are very vivid and have me waking sweaty and aroused.
Fuck! I need to get laid. Just a quick night with some random no-named woman to get it out of my system. I've managed with just my hand for months, but Dawn's presence is making that less and less gratifying. Even when I'm picturing her, it's just not enough. I'm not sure I'll be satisfied until I get to touch her . . . but I know that can't happen. So, a trip out of town this weekend for a nameless hook up might be just what I need to get over this crap with Dawn.
BRANDON IS IN and out for the next few days, and it’s Thursday at closing before I can grab him with a moment to spare.
“Hey, man. I know it’s late in the week, so not necessarily for this weekend, but as soon as possible, I’d like to take a three day weekend to get out of town. Any chance that can happen?”
“Of course. I can check with the guys and see if it can happen this weekend if you want. Will Saturday, Sunday, and Monday be okay?” His kindness is overwhelming at times. Any other boss would give you shit about taking time off, and for sure not be understanding about it being last minute.
“Perfectly. Thanks man.”
“I’ll call the guys and let you know tonight sometime.”
“Thanks again.”
The run on the beach this evening actually calms me. After grabbing some Chinese food on the way home, I skip the swim and pack with optimism, hoping the guys will step up for me this weekend. Of course, it’s not much to pack for a guy to have a few days away, but I make sure to throw in some gym clothes so I can burn off some extra steam if the whole one-night stand thing doesn’t work the way I hope it will.
Packing complete, I grab a shower, then relax on the couch and turn on some Sports Center before heading to bed. Not sure what time it is when I’m startled awake by my phone, but I’m relieved it’s Brandon.
“Yeah, man?”
“I got it all worked out for you. You can have the weekend off. I can let you get a jump on it early tomorrow if it slows down in the later part of the day if you want.”
“That’s great, Brandon. Thanks. I really appreciate it.”
“You’ve been a Godsend, you deserve a little time off. You haven’t taken a day off since the first week you were here. Just go get that head back on straight and come back to us. We all like having you around.”
“Thanks. Will do, boss. See you in the morning.”
“Night.”
Not sure how Brandon knows why I need the weekend, but he does. I know he’s been through a lot, like all the guys, but how can any of them understand what’s going on inside of me? Losing everything that mattered is a pain I wish on nobody, but I have to feel it. Every moment. Every day. It’s always there. It can be pushed to the back when I’m busy, but fuck if it doesn’t pop back up the first moment my brain has a moment to relax.
Thankfully Friday morning is busy and the guys don’t have a chance to question me about where I’m going. Quite frankly, I don’t have a plan, other than driving and stopping when I find a place that seems nice. All I need is a hotel, a bar, and an easy woman . . . one that understands she won’t be staying. I’m sure one night is all it’ll take.
I manage to avoid Dawn’s presence at lunch. She happily spends it with her uncle while I finish up on the last car of the day. Offering to work through lunch worked completely today, and didn’t draw any kind of unnecessary attention to the fact that I want to steer clear of Dawn. Every now and again, I catch a glimpse of her bright smile as she enjoys something Brandon says. There is even a point where I’m struck with a little jealousy when Ty is inside and they are laughing together. What I wouldn’t give to make her face light up that way . . . that would lead straight into danger, though. I shake the thought off and get back to work before someone notices.
A few hours later, I’m completely done with my work and my area is clean. I head inside to make sure all is good to head out, and am startled by Dawn sitting behind the counter with Brandon nowhere to be seen. It’s obvious I’m uncomfortable, and she doesn’t let it go like she normally does.
“Jason, I don’t know why you get all weird when I’m around. Uncle Brandon likes you, so he won’t give you a hard time for talking to me.”
Unable to decide how to respond, I end up stuttering out an “okay” response like a fool. Thankfully, Brandon walks back inside and saves me from having to discuss more with her. She says a quick goodbye to her uncle and heads out without another word to me. Of course, I can’t take my eyes off her ass as it sashays out the door.
Brandon’s chuckle drags my attention from her and back to him. “Like what you see, son?” Again, I have no idea how to respond.
“Uhmmm.”
Brandon just laughs at my response, before he says, “Dawn’s a good girl. Don’t be going there if you aren’t serious. She’s had enough heartache in her life. She doesn’t need any trouble. The guys think of her like a sister, so you’ll have to deal with them too if you mess with her.”
“It’s not gonna happen, sir.”
“Back to formalities, are we?” Brandon is enjoying my discomfort, but he changes the subject to save me. “So, where ya headed this weekend?”
“Not sure exactly. Just need to clear my head again. I think the open road will be good for me.”
“Ah, the good ol’ open road. Best head south for that. When you get to the next big city, head inland a bit. You’ll come to a decent size city where there’s a Holiday Inn that’s walking distance to a roadies’ bar. You’ll find what you need there. See ya on Tuesday. Enjoy.” And with that, he walks into his office, leaving me standing in the lobby alone. Again, I’m not sure how he knows exactly what I need, but I’m taking his word for it and heading to this bar. If it’s for roadies, the women that hang there know what the score is—one night, no strings. And no names would be even better.
SOMEHOW, THE STEADY sound of the tires hitting the cracks in the road, along with the music blaring through the speakers, is just enough noise to chase all my thoughts away. I can tell already, after only an hour on the road, this trip is just what I needed to refresh and rid my thoughts of Dawn.
Although this town is larger than the ones outside of the resort, it's still quite small. The Inn is just as Brandon described, and perfect for me over the next few days. I have no issues getting a room, despite the fact that this appears to be the only decent place to stay. Thankfully, it's not busy at all.
After checking in and showering, I hit the mom and pop diner next door for the next best thing to a home-cooked meal. It's a little late for dinner rush, so the place is practically empty, but the food is amazing. The waitress is young and pretty enough. There's nothing special about her, but she wears a kind smile and tries to make small talk with me. I'm not very accommodating. Her clothes are plain, and she seems way too sweet for what I need this weekend, so instead of being even a little friendly, I just grunt my answers at her and eventually she leaves me to myself. A situation I'm very familiar with these days.
I make my way to the little bar across the way that Brandon suggested. It's so much busier than the motel and diner. In fact, there are only a few spots at the bar open, and all the tables are full. They must all be here for the band setting up on stage. Hopefully, the place will fill up even more as we get closer to show time.
"What can I get for you?" The raspy voice from behind the bar pulls my attention away from the crowd.
"Just a coke." I barely make eye contact, then I scan the c
rowd to see if there's anyone interesting, but no one catches my eye.
Although there are people everywhere and plenty of noise, I still feel alone. There's a tall, thin, blonde below the stage. She has a pretty nice body, but she isn't afraid to show it off completely, which is kind of a turn off. Leave a little to the imagination. I know I came here for a quick little weekend fling, but I’m not looking to find the town slut either. And that outfit definitely screams "I get around." No thank you.
Damn. As nice as it is to be away from Dawn, I still can't help but compare these women to her. I need to shake her from my mind. I'm afraid it won't be pretty if I can't. I know I'll just hurt her. There isn't anything I can offer to anyone anymore. I'm just a shell of a man, and she deserves so much more.
The bar fills to standing room only as it gets closer to show time. I overhear the bartender talking to a few patrons sitting near me about the band. Apparently they are a local group that got its start here. I guess they've been touring in some bigger name bars around the country, and are back tonight for the first time in months. Seems the night isn't a total loss. At least I'll get a little entertainment. Unless it's some boy band, then I'm out.
A few women come over and try to make small talk, but I just can’t get into any of them. The first one sounds like she sucked on a helium balloon, so she’s out. The next two are a little too rough around the edges for me. I like my women soft and feminine, and they are anything but. The next few are extremely chatty and have a problem with over-sharing, making me think they’ll be clingers. Yeah, I'm not here to make friends, but I’ve got to be at least a little attracted to her. Thankfully, I get a little break in the women department and am left alone until the band starts playing. They're actually pretty good. A few songs in, I'm enjoying the music enough to decide to order a beer and relish this mix of rock and country. It's no wonder they have this place packed.
When the band takes a break, I see her. I don't have a clear view of her face, but my body still responds. She's just average height, but her blonde hair shines in the lights, giving off the illusion of a halo above her. She fills out her jeans nicely, and that ass . . . I'd love to have it in my hands. I have no shame. I'm definitely an ass man, and that is one fine ass. I can't tell you how full her lips are, or even what color her eyes are, but my body doesn't care. It doesn't even cross my mind that she could totally pass for Dawn from the side, until I'm just a few feet from her and she turns around to face me. What the fuck? It's her. Did Brandon send her here to keep tabs on me?
"Jason? What are you doing here?" She actually sounds surprised to see me.
"Your uncle told me about this place when I asked for some time off. Didn't expect to run into anyone, though. What brings you down here?"
"Huh. I guess Uncle Brandon only kinda listens. I've talked about this place for years, but I didn't tell him I'd be coming down this weekend. The drummer and I grew up together. I haven't seen him in almost a year. He called and asked me to come down while he was in town. He wasn't sure when he'd get back again. The band is doing so well, I wanted to celebrate with him. He's the only friend I still talk to from my childhood."
She keeps talking, but I'm so confused. Is he her boyfriend? Have I been misunderstanding her friendliness? I guess it doesn't matter to my body, because it's on high alert, with an electric current running through it as I take her in.
"Uh, Jason . . . "
Damn. I hate getting caught not paying attention, especially when I'm sure she has noticed my taking her in from head to toe. "Sorry, what were you saying?"
"Never mind." She looks around, probably searching for him.
"I'll catch ya later, Dawn. Enjoy your weekend with your friend." When her head snaps my direction, I realize I must've had a little sarcasm lacing my words. I shouldn't be upset, but I'm a little angry inside. I came to get her out of my mind, but it seems the problem is just mine.
"Wait. Why are you leaving? You can hang with us tonight. The band's just taking a short break."
"I'm good. Enjoy your weekend with your boy." Why would I want to be the third wheel? Or watch her swoon over her guy? No, what I need is to grab someone, take her back to my room, bury myself deep inside her, and forget all about Dawn.
"My boy? What are you talking about? I don't have a boy. Craig is my best friend. We've been through a lot together over the years, but we are only friends." With hands are on her hips, her anger at me comes through every word. I have no idea why she's angry, though. And my silence isn't making her any happier, judging from the narrowing of her eyes.
I know I need to say something, but I don't want to lead her on. I'm not good for her. She needs someone who can give her his whole heart, make her the center of his world. I can't do that. "Dawn, enjoy your night. I'm off to go find someone to enjoy mine with."
Yep, that does it. She turns around and storms away before I can even take another breath. But as I watch her go, I can feel the energy drain from my body. I know it's the right thing, though. With that, I head back to my spot, order a beer, and make a resolution to take one of these women back to my room tonight. I need to work Dawn out of my mind. And I need to do it now.
It isn't long before a group of girls catches my attention. One in particular might be the perfect distraction. I grab the attention of the bartender and ask that she order a round of whatever they are drinking on me, but to specifically say it's for the brunette in the pink tank top. Hopefully that'll be all it takes to bring her over.
I keep my body angled in that direction, watching out of the corner of my eye as the waitress takes their order and points at me. When they look my way, I tip my head and offer my beer up as a hello. That's all it takes to bring that pretty brunette my way.
"That was awful nice of you . . . " She pauses for me to give her my name.
"Jason. What's your name, beautiful?"
Before she answers, she lets out a little giggle, and all I can think is this is too easy.
"Carrie. I've never seen you around here. Are you new, or just passing through, Jason?"
"Actually, I'm just in this little town for the weekend, but I'm new to this state. I'm staying a few hours from here. How about you?"
"I grew up here in town. I've never really traveled far."
After a little more small talk, the band comes back out and makes it virtually impossible to have a conversation. Carrie seems to like the band. She's movin' those hips while she sits next to me. Seeing no point in trying to talk more, I pull her hand and drag her to the small dance floor directly in front of the band. Perfect timing too, because the band wraps up the song were playing and move into a slow one, perfect for pulling her body against mine and driving her wild enough to convince her to come back to my room with me.
WE BARELY MAKE it inside the room before she's reaching to unbutton my pants. Normally, I'd make sure to get her nice and ready before letting her touch me, but since this is just a one-night deal I don't care much. Shit! Does she know this is just a one-night deal? I absolutely need to make that clear before this gets too far. I don't want to make a mess here and not be able to come back.
"Hold up a sec." The roughness of my voice shocks her a little. "No worries, I'm not angry. It's not easy to put this on pause, but we need to be clear. I'm not looking for anything more than tonight."
"Understood. Now strip." She reaches for the hem of her shirt and, before I can move, pulls it over her head. As soon as her shirt leaves her hands, she's shimmying out of her jean skirt and kicking off her boots.
"What are you waiting for?" she asks, standing before me in just a blue lace bra and matching panties.
"I just want to make sure you're sure. There will be nothing beyond tonight."
"I’ve told you, I understand. Now strip and let's do this."
Knowing that she knows the score, I waste no time in stripping down to my boxer briefs and pulling her to the bed with me. When I feel my legs hit the edge of the bed, I turned her around and gently lay her on th
e bed. We're a mess of hands and tongues. However, I can't bring myself to kiss her on the lips. I drag my lips along her jawline, then down her neck to her collar bone. Judging from the moans and the increase in her pulse, it's working for her. Unfortunately, it's only working physically for me. I still have Dawn in the back of my mind. I need to fix this.
As I lick my way to the valley between her breasts, I reach around to undo her bra, and the little mewl that comes from the back of her throat lets me know how into this she is. It's a good thing, because I'm gonna need to get out of my damn head and into the moment. She is exactly what I came here for, but running into Dawn really screwed this up.
No matter where I put my hands and my mouth, the rest of my body doesn't jump on board. The longer I try, the more anxious I get. Knowing I need to take care of her, I work my hand into her panties. Fuck! She's wet and ready, what a damn waste. I sink one finger inside her while using my thumb to rub her clit. Her breathing becomes ragged, and I know she's getting close. I add another finger to her and drop my head to her chest, sucking her nipple into my mouth. That's all it takes to send her over the edge.
It's only a few moments before she relaxes beneath me, and the look on her face kills me. She reaches for me, ready to move to the next round, and I hate to stop, but it's not fair to her that I'm not into her the way I should be.
"Carrie, I'm on this trip to erase someone from my mind, and . . . well, it's not working. I won't have sex with you while I'm thinking about someone else. I'm sorry. Want me to call you a cab, or is your car across the street?"
"Are you sure? I know the score here, you don't owe me anything more than the night." She sounds hopeful, and I wish I could feel good about taking what she is offering, but I know my conscience won't allow it.
"Trust me, it's not anything against you. You are beautiful, but the woman I'm trying to get out of my head showed up here and it kinda messed with me again. It's certainly not something I want to turn down, but I can't look at you and think of her. It's just wrong."
A Soldier's Dawning (The Happy Endings Resort Series Book 8) Page 4