Complete Me (Royals Saga Book 7)
Page 4
Though I might be inclined to try, I couldn’t actually argue with his logic. I needed to switch tactics.
“We don’t know where an investigation like this might lead,” I explained. “It’s possible that this could be connected to my father’s assassination.”
I swallowed on that final word. Even after a year and a half it was still unfathomable that he had been taken in such a violent manner. Finding out that he had a secret son could be a mere skeleton in the closet or it could be more.
“It seems unlikely—if you want me to be honest.” He tacked on the last bit as an afterthought.
“I do want you to be honest,” I assured him, “even when I don’t like it. But how can we be certain if we don’t look into it?”
“We can’t,” Brex said, “but I suspect the matter of this…discovery is more about curiosity than it is a matter of national security.”
“We can’t rule it out. Not without knowing more.” My gut told me that I was right about this. None of the secrets my father kept were innocent. “He paid the mother of his love child to keep quiet.”
“And he was still paying her at the time of her death,” Brex reminded me gently. “Look, I’m not telling you to not look into this, but don’t divest all your resources. There were other interesting pieces of information in the files the Americans gave us. We need to examine all of it.”
“I need someone I trust looking into this. If you’re right and this brother is a nobody, his anonymity will be short-lived if the press find out about him.” There had been plenty of speculation regarding my father’s romantic life after my mother’s untimely death. Even the insinuation of this affair would fuel a tabloid frenzy. Until I knew more about why he’d kept this secret I needed to protect it from the outside world.
“If I focus on this, you’ll need to put someone else in charge of the assassination investigation.”
That wouldn’t be a problem. “A temporary shift in focus shouldn’t be a problem since we haven’t had any new leads in—”
Brex cut me off, “As I mentioned, the CIA gave us some new information to consider. We’ve been following an important lead.”
“That I haven’t been informed of?” I roared as the friendliness I usually felt toward Brexton slipped.
“I considered it prudent to look into the matter further before I briefed you—for the sake of Parliament.”
“Parliament?” I repeated. Could he be implying that the conspiracy had its roots in our very government? Judging from the placid detachment in Brexton’s eyes that was exactly what he was doing. As soldiers, we’d been taught to compartmentalize. By keeping our emotions in check we wouldn’t make decisions based on our feelings. Brex still had that ability. I did not.
For the first time, I allowed my control over the room to falter. Dropping my head into my hands, I considered the position I found myself in now. Neither avenue of investigation could be dismissed outright. Both need to be examined—thoroughly and by people I trusted.
“Could Norris?” Brexton suggested as though he could sense my dilemma.
I shook my head, finally lifting it to meet his gaze. “He’s in charge of Clara and Elizabeth.”
No matter how my situation might change or what information became available, they had to remain my primary concern. No answers and no justice were worth putting the two of them at risk. Clara still ruffled at my security measures, but she’d grown accustomed to Norris’s presence. But not only was it a matter of my wife’s happiness, it also came down to the fact that he was the only person I trusted with the two people I loved most in the world.
“In that case, that only leaves one other person.” We both knew who he was talking about, but there was no missing his hesitation. It wasn’t a suggestion he would make lightly given my history.
“You trust her?” I asked. The number of people in a position to take over Brexton’s work was limited. That meant that I needed to delegate some of the decisions to him. But even so it was a tough pill to swallow.
“I do. I know the two of you had some issues in the past.”
I raised an eyebrow as I tried to decipher what he was really saying. If he knew the true nature of my relationship with his colleague or if he’d merely guessed. I didn’t have many secrets from my friend, but I didn’t discuss Georgia Kincaid if I could help it.
“She’s discreet.” It was the most complimentary trait I could find to describe her. Georgia had once helped initiate me into the world of Dominance. As far as I knew she didn’t brag that I’d been a past client nor did she share the other men of power she’d submitted to. Our relationship had never been sexual but rather a therapeutic proposition. I’d realized far too late that it had been a power play on behalf of her employer to keep me under his thumb. “But she’s also a mercenary. Her loyalty can be bought.”
Brexton’s shoulders tensed, a vein ticking in his neck, at my words. Even so he was remarkably calm as he responded. “She was a mercenary. She’s proven her loyalty to our side.”
I bit my tongue before I could ask when he had fallen in love with her. His attachments were none of my business, and Brexton was smart enough to handle her if she proved to still be trouble. I should have seen the inevitability of the romance, but I’d been too caught up in my own affairs to redirect his attention.
“I suppose people change,” I offered. I had changed with Clara’s help.
“Yes, they do.” There was a finality in his tone that even I didn’t dare question. “It’s your call.”
It was my choice. Every possible decision had its disadvantages, but none of them outweighed the danger of inaction. “Brief her.”
Brexton nodded, maintaining a professional detachment at my proclamation, but I spotted a gleam of triumph in his eyes. He stood, straightening as if he might salute me. Thinking better of it, he headed for the door.
“Brex,” I called before he could leave my office, “tread carefully.”
The triumph faded but he managed a much more curt nod of acknowledgment.
He might not like to hear it, but it was my responsibility as a friend to warn him. Perhaps my past associations with Georgia had left me prejudiced against her. Still despite our differences, I was certain of one thing: no one ever really knew Georgia.
Except one person.
I was dialing his mobile before my conscious thoughts caught up with my body. Smith answered on the third ring.
“Yes?” The subtle trace of Scot in his tone only underscored his obvious disregard for my position. Then again, an alpha male never bowed to another alpha male, regardless of title.
“My hand has been forced.” I explained the situation, taking care to leave out why I’d reassigned Brexton. If Smith was curious about what other matter I found more pressing, he didn’t ask. “Keep an eye on Georgia.”
“Is that an order?” he asked dryly.
It was a very good thing that we were having this conversation over the phone. The man knew how to get under my skin. We’d achieved a tenuous peace over the last year, but our relationship remained strained at the best times. Like now. I had to remind myself that he was my ally.
“I like to think of it as a mutually beneficial request.” When it came to the safety of those we loved, Smith and I saw eye to eye. I was counting on that understanding now.
There was a pause. “Consider it done.”
5
“Are you planning to leave your study this evening?”
I startled at the sound of my wife’s voice. Tearing myself away from the file I’d been reading for the fifth time, I glanced up. Clara paused in the doorway, the light from the hall cast a glowing silhouette around her. It framed her like an angel, and that’s what she was: my own angel sent to deliver me from myself. She stepped forward and came into better view. Her dark hair fell over her shoulders and her face was fresh, free of any cosmetics. She wore a simple white, silk robe that skimmed along her divine body. As I drank her in, the points of her breasts beaded
under the thin fabric. I loved how her body responded to me, even at this distance.
“What time is it?” I asked, rubbing the back of my neck absently. What I was really asking was how long I had to fuck her before she pleaded for sleep. If it was up to me, I’d spend every moment of my life making love to her.
Her eyebrow arched as a smile twisted over her face. She knew exactly what I was thinking. “It’s ten. Bedtime.”
“Would you like me to join you?” I reached for the power button on my computer monitor. She didn’t have much of a choice as to whether I joined her if she was going to walk around looking so tempting.
“If isn’t too much trouble.” She sauntered to the desk and bent over, tapping her fingers on the mahogany. Bending slightly forward, her robe fluttered open enough to reveal a glimpse of creamy breast. “Unless you have something better to do.”
“Tonight I’m taking what’s mine, poppet.” If she wasn’t careful, I’d be claiming her on the top of this desk. But as I stood my mobile vibrated in my pocket. I shot her an apologetic smile and she shrugged. She had grown accustomed to quick messages and late night crises. Once I had her naked nothing short of nuclear war would be enough to draw my attention away from her. Slipping the phone from my trousers, I checked the screen. I couldn’t stop myself from grimacing when I saw the text from Brexton, and without thinking, I dropped back into my chair. Georgia had gleefully agreed to take the new assignment. That didn’t surprise me, but I wasn’t thrilled to have her heading up such an important matter.
“What’s wrong?” Clara asked, studying my features.
“Nothing,” I lied, and my wife frowned. The two of us had been through far too much for me to get something past her. She knew my moods, mercurial as they were, and she loved me anyway. But she had no patience for lies. I shot off a quick response, reminding myself that sometimes the less she knew, the less she had to worry about. Clara might disagree with that assessment but I considered it a marital duty.
Clara came around the desk and carefully climbed onto my lap. Judging from the heat between her legs, the robe was all she was wearing. I couldn’t help but enjoy the sensation of her cunt nuzzling against my groin. She pressed a finger to my chin and drew my face up to hers to plant a soft, inviting kiss on my lips.
“Tell me what’s on your mind.” Apparently her invitation came with a price.
“Nothing you should worry about.” This time I wasn’t lying. Instead I tried to be reassuring. There was no need for Clara to carry my burdens. She’d given up a normal life by marrying me and I wouldn’t pile every matter of state or security on her. “Only one of us should be tasked with dealing with the mundane issues of the country.”
“That’s not it.” Her eyes searched mine for the answer that wasn’t forthcoming. “This isn’t some Parliamentary issue. You’ve been preoccupied since we left the States. Talk to me about it. I can help.”
“Just being with you helps.” It did. Her presence was a comforting assurance that I was acting of her best interest.
“I don’t like it when you keep things from me, X,” she warned.
I brushed a kiss over her mouth, and she sighed. Her body softened against me despite her hesitance. “Sometimes you have to trust me.”
“I could say the same thing.” Clara buried her face into my shoulder. “I can handle it. Whatever it is. We said no secrets, remember?”
We had. I promised her that I was through keeping secrets from her, and then I’d proceeded to keep them anyway. Not because I didn’t trust her, but because I loved her. If only she could see that. I had to make her understand. “My only concern is with protecting you.”
Clara stayed silent and I could see her struggling with how to respond. I suspected the reason I’d gotten away with my past indiscretions had a lot to do with her knowing exactly why I had made the choices I did. Her life had been threatened on more than one occasion. It was a fact that I couldn’t live with.
“I’m stronger than you think,” she said at last. “I can handle it.”
“If you only knew.” I laughed under my breath. “If you had any idea how much I struggle with my need to protect you.”
“Show me. Let me in. Take what you need from me.” She stroked her hand down the side of my face.
It was an offer that I found difficult to refuse. Since the moment I’d met Clara, I’d felt compelled to watch over her. But not simply to just protect her. I wanted to claim her—own her. I’d longed to take that lovely creature and spirit her away where I would be the only one to ever touch her. She would be safe with me, and she would be mine. I tore my gaze from her and the temptation she was unknowingly dangling over me. “You don’t know what you’re saying.”
She caught my face and held it steady. “I am yours. All of me. Take what you need, and nothing less.”
“Clara.” I swallowed against the longing building inside me. I had to put a stop to this. “I could never.”
“You can. I’m asking you to. Whatever it takes. I don’t want anything between us. Show me.”
Her words vanquished my resistance, and I slid my arms around her. Lifting her into my arms as I stood, I carried her toward our bedroom. Clara exhaled contentedly as I laid her across our bed and plucked open the sash of her robe. It fell open to reveal the luscious curves of her body. I took a step back and surveyed my prize. On another night I would take her right then and there. My cock throbbed as if to second this plan, but I ignored it. I always needed her body. I always wanted it. Tonight, I demanded her freedom.
“Take it off,” I commanded her.
Clara wriggled under my watchful gaze until she shrugged the robe from her shoulders. Reaching down, I slid it free from her until it was only her, stripped to nothing for me. She waited, her breath speeding up with expectation. When I moved away from the bed, she remained still. Clara enjoyed it when we played, so when I went to the closet, she made no effort to stop me. At the far end of the walk-in an antique armoire waited ominously. I kept the key with me at all times in an effort to prevent a curious maid from discovering its contents. Opening the black lacquer door, I found what I was looking for immediately. I chose the white, silk rope because it seemed fitting given that I had deprived Clara of her robe. While I loved the sight of red bindings on my wife’s fair skin, tonight I wanted the innocence. Despite my tastes, there was a purity to Clara that even my darkness couldn’t touch.
I reappeared over her with the rope and surprise flashed over her eyes. Perhaps she thought this was a game. Or a test. I saw it for what it was—for what she had given me. An offering. At times, she forgot what I was. I would remind her of that. I was the predator.
Clara held out her wrists, crossed in supplication. I uncrossed them, meeting her eyes as I took one firmly. She didn’t pull away as my grip tightened. This part I would do slowly if only to grant her a second chance. I kept my gaze locked to hers and wondered if she saw the darkness of my thoughts. Leaning down, I found her ankle and urged her leg up. She bent it willingly, even as I brought her wrist to her calf. Then I began to work, looping and tucking until her arm and leg were tied tightly to one another. I repeated the action on the other side. When I was done her legs were spread and bound, displaying the pretty pink gash of her cunt. Her knees pressed into the soft mounds of her breasts, her nipples peeking from above. I wanted to take them in my mouth and suck until she came, but this wasn’t about pleasure. She licked her lips, her eyes hooding with want.
“This is what I want, poppet,” I murmured. I drew my hand through the air over her naked sex, just enough to stir the air so that she would squirm against her restraints. “I want you helpless to my control. I want to tie you up and lock you away.”
“X,” she whispered, her eyes widening as she began to piece together what I was saying.
“Shh,” I hushed her. “I want you to be mine. I want you to do as I say. Right now you’ll do anything I ask, won’t you?”
She swallowed, managing to move her
head enough for a slight nod.
“All I want is to know that you’re here.” I didn’t wait for my words to sink in before I turned and left her there. Shutting the bedroom door behind me, I walked back to my study and poured myself a bourbon. It should make me feel like a monster for leaving her like that, but instead I took pleasure in it. Some of the weight I’d carried with me since we met had lifted from my shoulders. I took my responsibility for Clara seriously. Since I’d accidentally dragged her into my life, I’d worried for her safety every moment she wasn’t in my sight. I was a modern enough man to know that I couldn’t reasonably expect my wife to be near me at all times. Even when we were home, her absence from presence needled me. Now there was no question what she was doing or who she was with. I had never known real freedom in my life , and I hated that I savored taking hers now.
I sipped my drink slowly. It burned down my throat. Clara was a wild thing that allowed me to tame her at her pleasure. I had pushed her past her comfort levels before. In every case, she had asked it of me. But that didn’t mean she understood when I crossed the line. I had no idea what to expect when I went back to her this evening. She had told me to take what I needed from her, and I had done it. Too often people in my life offered me lip service without devotion. My wife served my pleasure in my bed and I always rewarded her trust. But there had always been the promise of limits coloring our intimacy. I’d abandoned that. Draining the last of my glass, I stood and left it on the table. I paused and listened at the door. No sound came from within. I opened it a crack and caught sight of her on the bed. I had no idea if it had been minutes or hours. I only knew that enough time had passed to call me back to her. My heart pounded in my chest and I strode toward her.
She didn’t speak when I reached her. Her eyes were closed but I spotted two dried trails of tears. I undid my cuff links as I waited. She didn’t open her eyes. I left them on the nightstand and began to undo the buttons on my shirt. I’d taken off all of my clothes before her lashes fluttered. When our eyes met, they were full—of tears, of accusations, of need.