My Sister My Momma My Wife

by Lipsey, Shelia E.

  “Guess this is for me.” Stiles washed his hands at the island sink and then prepared to sit down at the table to eat. He looked around the kitchen as he enjoyed the delicious food. Detria had always been a great cook who believed in eating healthy.

  He tried calling Detria again on her cell phone. This time she answered.

  “Hello,” she said dryly.

  “I take it the food in the microwave was for me,” he said.

  “Don’t I always leave your food in the microwave? So why would you think any differently?”

  “I didn’t say I thought any differently. I just wasn’t sure. I didn’t know if you were still angry with me or not.”

  Detria remained quiet.

  “Hello,” Stiles said. “You still there?” he asked.

  “Yes.”

  “Where are you?”

  “At the church.” Her answers were short and to the point.

  Stiles knew that she was still mad at him, but he felt he had every right to be mad at her too, but decided not to show his attitude. Instead he believed it was his duty to keep the peace in their household. If this marriage was going to work, he had to give in a little more.

  “You must be getting things finalized for tomorrow’s official opening of the children’s center.”

  Detria’s voice changed from bland to excitement as she talked about the activities she had planned to take place during eleven o’clock worship service and following the church services.

  “The media will be here most of the day and the children are practicing as we speak in their new state of the art children’s worship center. Stiles, everything is going to be perfect.”

  “I’m glad, sweetheart.” He called her sweetheart without realizing it. “ Detria, I want to tell you again how sorry I am about last night. I would never ever hurt you, let alone hit you. I guess I’ve been stressed out more than usual. You know with this new addition to the church, the opening of the academy and just the way Holy Rock is growing. It’s a bit overwhelming. Tell me that you forgive me.”

  “Stiles, I forgive you, but it’s just that last night, well I still can’t believe how close you came to hurting me. I never thought I would be afraid of my own husband, but you. I don’t know, Stiles. It was just plain scary.”

  “I know it was, and I promise you it’ll never happen again. I’ve prayed and asked God to forgive me. I just got so crazy mad when I heard you on the phone. For a minute, all I could think about was what I’d gone through with Rena. I know all of that is in my past, but every now and then, I guess it still bothers me,” he explained.

  “I’m not Rena. I’m not your ex. And if you don’t trust me, then what do we have?” she asked.

  “You’re right.” Stiles took another bite of his food. “Look, we can talk about this later when you get home. I’m just glad you’re talking to me again.”

  “Yea, sure, we’ll talk later.”

  “Hey, where’s my sweetpea?”

  “She’s right here in the office with me. She’s asleep on the sofa.”

  “Kiss her for me.”

  “I will.”

  Stiles thought he heard a man’s voice in the background but he couldn’t quite make out what the guy was saying to Detria.

  “Is someone in your office with you?”

  “Oh, that was Skip. He just walked in.”

  “Oh, that was quick.”

  “What was quick?”

  “Well, I just left him. We had breakfast together, earlier, and afterward he went to Emerald Estates with me and helped me take some boxes down from the attic. Pastor said he wanted to go through some of that stuff and clear it out as much as possible. But anyway, Skip said he was going home and get ready for the game tonight.”

  “I called him and he told me the same thing, but I really needed him to come by and sign off on the work the subcontractors were finishing up this evening. I thought they were going to be finished yesterday, but you know how things go.”

  “Pastor, everything is in order. I’m about to get out of here.” Stiles heard Skip tell him in the background.

  “Tell him I hear him. And as for you, I guess I’ll see you when you get home.”

  “Yea. Sure.”

  “Detria. Hold up.”

  “What?” she answered.

  “I went by Pho Binh and picked up some fried rice.” He could tell Detria was smiling by the tone of her voice.

  “Oh, Stiles. Thank you. I’ll have it for supper this evening. I put away a plate of food in the refrigerator for myself, but you can eat it.”

  “Cool. Talk to you later.”

  “Bye.”

  Stiles ate the remainder of food and felt some relief that the tension between him and Detria seemed to have passed. He had to be more disciplined when it came to his marriage and how he treated her. She was right; if there was no trust between them, there was no marriage.

  After he finished eating, Stiles washed out his dishes and then retreated to the garage to get the boxes he’d brought home. One by one he removed each one and carried them into the downstairs room that used to be Pastor’s bedroom.

  “Might as well tackle some of this stuff,” he said and sat down on the floor, pulling one of the boxes next to him. He opened the first box and sorted through the items. Most of the things were foreign to him so he put them aside for Pastor to look through. By the time he made it to the third box, Stiles was ready to call it quits until he saw a bright red cigar looking box. He removed it and opened it. Several documents were folded inside. One by one Stiles unfolded them. His mouth dropped open as he read what appeared to be letters exchanged between Pastor and Audrey. One of them caused Stiles’ head to literally swim.

  I cannot do this anymore. Every time I look at her, I hate her more and more. I did what you said, and I didn’t have an abortion. But knowing that this, this child is unwanted....

  “Who is she talking about?” Stiles asked himself. He wanted to put down the letter, put it back in the little red box but he couldn’t. He understood that this was Pastor’s personal belongings, but his curiosity kept his eyes glued to the words on the paper written in his mother’s handwriting.

  You’re the one who wanted her. Why? Why wouldn’t you just let me give her away? Or have an abortion. Oh, but you said abortion was murder. But I guess it was fine for me to go through all this torment over the years. Every time I look at her, I have to be reminded of that night. I have to live with it by looking at his baby every day of my life.

  Sweat formed on Stiles’ brow. He read the remainder of the letter. At the end it was signed Audrey.

  “Is she talking about Francesca? No, no, no, she can’t be,” he told himself. He looked through the rest of the box. There were several news clippings paper- clipped together. One heading read, “Serial Rapist Prowling East Memphis Neighborhood”. Hands shaking, Stiles skimmed over the rest of the clipping before he turned to a second one, then a third one, all talking about a serial rapist in East Memphis.

  “I remember living in East Memphis before we moved to Emerald Estates,” he said.

  The fourth clipping read, ‘Police have arrested a 27 year old convicted rapist who allegedly broke into two dozen homes in East Memphis over the course of six months. He entered the homes through a bedroom window, tied up his victims and forced them to disrobe at knifepoint…

  Detective Taurus Withers said each of the seven victims told investigators similar stories of a man armed with a jagged edge knife that came in through their bedroom window and sexually assaulted them.

  The last headline read, “East Memphis Serial Rapist Will Serve Life Behind Bars”

  Stiles returned the letter and the news clippings back to the red box. He picked up the box, stood to his feet and left the house. He had to find out who Audrey had been talking about in that letter. Was the man in the news clippings Francesca’s father, or did he have another sister out there somewhere? A sister who was the product of rape? Audrey was dead, so Pastor was the only
one who could give him the answers he needed, and Stiles was going to make sure that Pastor did just that.

  11

  “Of all the worldly passions, lust is the most intense. All other worldly passions seem to follow in its train.” Buddha

  “What did he want?” asked Skip.

  “Nothing. Trying to check up on me on the sly. And he’s s trying to act all sweet now, hoping I’m not mad at him anymore.”

  “Are you?”

  “I am not going to stand for any man hitting on me.”

  “But he didn’t hit you, Detria. That’s what you said.”

  “I don’t care; he was about to. And he always wants folks to think that he’s so holy and righteous. Skip, he may be your friend and your pastor, and he may be my husband, but I’m not the one. I don’t deserve to be mistreated. And I will not be abused. I gave him a child, a beautiful daughter, and I’ll be darned if he’s going to flip out and act a fool just because I won’t let him control me.” Detria folded both hands together and leaned back in her office chair.

  Skip smiled at her. “You are a firecracker, you know that?”

  Detria responded with a flashy smile of her own. “Thought you had a game to go to,” she said, still smiling.

  “I do. That is,” he paused. “Are we done here? Anything else you need?”

  “Don’t make me go there, Skip Madison.” Resting her chin on her hand, she grinned mischievously. “Remember, I’m a married woman, and, the First Lady of Holy Rock.” A smirk came across her face.

  “Must you remind me,” he murmured and turned to leave. “I’ll talk to you later.”

  “Okay. Enjoy the game,” she said.

  “Thanks. I’ll try to hit you up later, after it’s over.”

  Detria nodded and watched Skip as he left, closing the door to her office. She got up, smoothed her fitted skirt, walked from behind her desk and went to the sofa where Baby Audrey still lay sleeping. She looked down at her, smiled and then turned and walked away while saying, “No wonder you don’t sleep all night; you sleep all day.”

  Detria began tidying up her office, putting away Audrey’s toys that she kept in the office, and her baby blanket. Looking inside of the diaper bag, she didn’t see her pacifier. Detria searched around the office before she went in the bathroom to see if perhaps she’d left it in there; and she had. She retrieved it and put it in the bag, then put the bag on her shoulder. As she passed her desk, she grabbed her Chanel bag, and then went and picked up Audrey from off the couch. Audrey lifted her head, and looked around.

  “You awake, little girl? Did Mommy wake you from your beauty rest? That’s all right. You’re going to always be beautiful no matter what,” she told a sleepy looking Baby Audrey.

  Detria locked the door to her office, and walked through the children’s center a final time before she left Holy Rock for home. On her drive she thought about Rena and laughed a wicked laugh. “Audrey, your grandmother would be proud of me. That little lesbo slut. Your daddy and her think they could fool me, but never in this lifetime. Honey, one thing you’re learn about your mother, is that it’s hard to make a fool out of me. I know she still loves him. She probably still loves your Aunt Francesca too. And if I was any other woman, she’d probably have stolen your daddy right from under my nose. But,” Detria raised one finger in the air as she drove and talked. “But, I’m not just any other woman. That’s where she has me messed up. I bet she spazzed out when she opened that box.” She chuckled loudly. “I know she’s going to call him, and that’s when I’m going to bust his tail.” She glanced over her shoulder and quickly eyed Baby Audrey who was kicking her legs and sucking contently on her pacifier. “If he confronts me about something she told him, then I’m going to know that first, they have probably never stopped communicating, and two, I’ll know where his heart is if he tries to go off on me about some other female, especially his ex. But we’ll see, sweetpea. Won’t we now?”

  Detria pushed the power button on the steering wheel and the radio popped on. Immediately she turned up the volume and began to sing along with Kirk Franklin. “After a while, after a while, this too shall pass….”

  ◊

  As Stiles approached Pastor’s gated complex, he dialed his number to let him know that he was coming to pay him a visit. Stiles parked his automobile, grabbed hold to the red box and ran up the walkway.

  Pastor answered the door. “Hello, son. To what do I owe this surprising visit tonight?”

  “I did what you asked me to do. I cleared the attic, got rid of some stuff that I knew was of no value or importance to you. And I brought some boxes home with me. I started going through some of them.”

  Pastor patted Stiles on the shoulder as Stiles walked further into the apartment. Pastor closed the door.

  “Thank you, thank you.” Pastor said. “I’ll get over there one day this week and go through some of the stuff you kept down.”

  Stiles raised the red box and pushed it out toward Pastor. “Tell me if you know what this is.”

  Pastor looked at the box and slowly regarded it. Stiles saw a disturbing frown form on Pastor’s face.

  “What are you doing with that?” Pastor asked. “Give it here. That was your mother’s.”

  “So, you know what’s inside?” Stiles watched Pastor as he turned and walked over to his recliner and sat down. His face suddenly looked like he’d age ten or fifteen years in a matter of seconds.

  “Why is that of importance to you? Just give it here,” Pastor said again in a demanding tone. “You had no right to go through her things. I told you I would do that.”

  “And I told you that I was going to sort through some of the things first, so it wouldn’t be so much on you. I just didn’t have any idea that I would find out a shameful, dirty family secret.”

  “It’s none of your business. I don’t care what you saw or read.”

  “So you do know what’s inside this box, don’t you? And everything my mother has gone through when she was here on this earth, you’re responsible for it,” Stiles yelled. “Tell me, father,” Stiles said in a disrespectful tone. “Who is my mother talking about? Where is this child you made her have because of your religiosity?”

  “I don’t owe you an explanation about anything that happened between me and your mother. And don’t you talk to me in that tone.”

  Stiles basically ignored his father’s words. “Oh, that’s where you’re wrong. You do owe me an explanation. My mother may be gone to glory, but there’s a child out there, a brother or sister I have somewhere. One that is from what she says in these letters, is the product of rape.” Stiles patted the top of the red box and then walked closer to Pastor and gave the box to him. “Now, tell me why you forced her to keep a child that wasn’t even yours and one that was by some sick, evil minded excuse of a human being? Why did you do that to her?” Stiles anger increased.

  Pastor bowed his head and slowly opened the red box. “Two wrongs don’t make a right. And Audrey and I, well we wanted children of our own. Not that I didn’t love you as my son, but she wanted to give me a child so bad, but it just didn’t happen, but it just never happened for us.

  I was at the church the night she was raped. We had finished Bible study but I had a meeting with the ministers at the church so your mother decided she was going to leave, run by Wal-Mart and then head home and wait on me. Only she was raped behind where that Wal-Mart on American Way used to be.” Pastor’s head still hung low, averting Stiles’ piercing gaze.

  “Why don’t I remember any of this?” Stiles asked, shaking his head and biting his lower lip.

  “Because, Son, you were just a kid, only about five years old, and we made sure we kept it from you. That woman was a true warrior. She survived. Praise God.”

  “You sit here talking about ‘oh, your mother was a true warrior. Praise God.’ Well, I don’t want to hear that crap. You forced my mother,” Stiles balled his hands into fists and pounded his chest with his right hand. “to have another
man’s child. A man who tried to kill her? What kind of person are you?” Stiles looked sickened by what he was hearing from Pastor. “And why didn’t they give her that, that pill? That morning after pill so she wouldn’t get pregnant? Did you stop them from doing that too?”

  Pastor’s face transformed into a mask of rage. He lashed out as he stared up toward Stiles. “Of course I didn’t stop the doctors from doing all they could to help your mother. And not that it’s any of your business, but they did give her the pill, but she still ended up being pregnant. Plus, it wasn’t until a few weeks later, when it was time for her period and she missed it, that we really got nervous. At first we thought the stress and trauma of being sexually assaulted kept her from having a cycle. But the following month came and she still hadn’t come on her period so she went to see an ob/gyn. They ran a pregnancy test, and the rest is history.

  I didn’t want her to have an abortion because it was a high probability that the child she was carrying could be mine. But after Francesca was born, we did a DNA test and….”

  “Francesca? Francesca is not your biological daughter?” Stiles took a step backward like he was about to fall, but he managed to steady himself. “No wonder mother acted like she did toward her. And you, you did nothing about it.”

  “She is my daughter. I don’t care what some DNA test says. I loved Francesca from the time she was in your mother’s womb up until this very day. So don’t you stand there like some pompous, self-righteous idiot,” Pastor yelled. “I wouldn’t change one thing if it meant Francesca wasn’t in my life. God works in mysterious ways.”

  “Don’t blame this on God. What you did to Audrey was dead wrong. You weren’t the one who was raped and tortured. You weren’t the one who had to feel a baby growing inside her belly for nine months while knowing that the man who impregnated her wasn’t you but a monster. And you say you loved my mother? You were thinking about yourself, and probably doubting your own manhood,” Stiles continued to yell and rant.