Strictly Incubusiness

by Vanessa Mulberry

  “Order,” she said, tapping her gavel on the wood of her bench. The busy courtroom hushed. “Before we begin, can we please search the defendant?”

  He stepped into the middle of the room and they searched him, shaking out his bag and his boots. Someone from the balcony shouted: “Strip search!” and it was deemed a good idea by all, including Kai who wanted to win over the crowd. He peeled off his clothes and leaned against the dock in the sort of seductive pose he used when he was working the streets. There was a great deal of cheering.

  After a few minutes, everything was handed back to him, and he gave the crowd a sympathetic shrug and blew a few kisses.

  “There’s nothing on him,” announced an extremely red-faced guard. This was met with a cheer from the crowd.

  “That signifies nothing,” a man who Kai assumed was the prosecutor said, “He’s had eighteen months to rid himself of the evidence.”

  “Were you expecting to find anything on him, Mr. Craghop?” the judge asked.

  “No,” said Craghop. “It was merely an observation.”

  They went through the motions of the court. Kai was bored. He surveyed the crowd again, this time on the lookout for Tynan who was nowhere to be seen. Kai didn’t want to believe Tynan would let him down, but that didn’t stop the sliver of fear that stole into his heart.

  A second came when the judge informed him the guards were all equipped with iron arrows due to the nature of the crime and Kai’s abilities. One he could deal with. One hundred would probably kill him, despite his strength.

  “And who is to be your counsel?” Wisemark asked.

  Kai looked around again uselessly, but Tynan still wasn’t there. “I suppose I must speak for myself,” he said, rallying to put on another show, “for there is no man here who knows better than I what happened that day.”

  “So how did you kill him?” Craghop asked.

  “I didn’t.”

  “So how did he die?”

  Kai hesitated. “I don’t know,” he said, praying he was pulling off ‘shame-faced admission’ rather than ‘outright lie.' He could use a few people in the crowd with Tynan’s talents right then.

  And then he heard him.

  “I will speak for the incubus.”

  Every eye in the court turned to see Tynan stood in the doorway, holding the thick slabs of wood open with his arms as he stood in the center. He was late, but he didn’t look like he’d rushed to get there. Kai felt a tug of pride in whatever bodily organ was devoted to drama. The Physicians Guild had yet to discover that.

  “You should listen to him,” Kai said, fighting the urge to hurry to Tynan. He didn’t want to get shot. “His dad is Ostus, god of justice, in case you’ve all forgotten. Terrible father, expert teller of wrong from right. He knows.”

  There were a few oohs from the crowd.

  “Shut up about my bloody dad,” Tynan hissed as he passed Kai on his approach to the bench.

  “I’m glad you’re here,” Wisemark said to Tynan. “I understood you had expressed an interest in collecting the defendant’s bounty.”

  “I did. But after talking with him, I am convinced of his innocence. He escaped my capture, but that feeling has not changed. I always intended to bring him here to stand trial because I believe you will agree.”

  It was possibly the longest, most coherent set of sentences Tynan had ever spoken in Kai’s presence and Kai would be eternally grateful for that.

  “I’d save the assumptions,” Wisemark said. “We work in facts in this court.”

  “Then I would like to give testimony. You know my talent for discovering lies from truth. It is well documented by this court over numerous cases.”

  “I do know your talent,” Wisemark said, looking at her notes. “And you’ve served this court admirably since I was a girl. But I am also aware you spent last night in the prisoner’s cell.”

  There was an audible gasp from the crowd now. Kai could hear whispers about conflicts of interest and reminders that he had also slept with every witness scheduled to speak against him.

  Tynan looked the judge in the eye and calmly said, “You should know that I’d never bed a killer.”

  Wisemark smiled at him and picked up another piece of paper from her bench. Looking it over, she said, “I know a few things about your visit. Your time in the defendant’s cell has been described as ‘Relentless,' ‘The sort of thing you read about in smutty chapbooks,' and ‘Showing off.'”

  There was a smattering of applause from the crowd, which became thunderous when Kai shouted, “To that, we plead guilty!”

  Wisemark banged her gavel again.

  When silence returned, Tynan said, “Kai was offered the opportunity to feed on members of the Royal Harem. I merely supplied myself as the meal instead. This court is well aware of my immortality and now understands the insatiable nature of the incubus. I could hardly expect him to feast on humans.”

  “What a noble sacrifice,” Wisemark said with a snort. “Look, you have obviously taken kindly to the defendant. But the fact remains, he ran, and the prince died suddenly.”

  “That is unfortunate, but I believe it to be a coincidence.”

  “On what basis?”

  “On the same basis you believe he is guilty: instinct.”

  There was a murmur through the crowd. Apparently instinct wasn’t worth much when it came to murder trials. Kai hoped Tynan had more than that in his arsenal.

  Wisemark frowned at Tynan. “Are you telling me the countless trials you have lie detected on have just been guesswork on your part?”

  “Not at all. Just that the decisions come from within. I don’t have someone whisper the truth into my ear.”

  A man clad in green stepped up to the bench and whispered something in Wisemark’s ear. He handed her a note, and she read it through while the court held its breath. She looked at it closely and then held it far away, holding the paper up to the light. When she was done, she stiffened, and then waved the guard away. “Guilty,” she said, banging her gavel.

  “No!” Tynan barked. “How is he guilty? Where is the evidence?”

  She held up the note. “Here. It’s a letter signed by the defendant confessing to the murder.”

  Tynan went to the bench and snatched it out of her hand. “I did it. Kai,” he read. “It doesn’t even say what he did?”

  “Hold it to the light.”

  Tynan did. There was the royal watermark. This was written on the prince’s paper.

  “So? It’s still not enough evidence to pronounce him guilty.” He looked to Kai, who was looking extremely guilty. “No. You didn’t do it, Kai? Did you?”

  Kai had not killed the prince. But when he wrote that note he had done something he wasn’t proud of. “I didn’t kill Timothy.”

  “But?” Tynan pressed.

  “But I may have killed someone else.”

  The court erupted, but Kai couldn’t hear them. He couldn’t bring himself to look at the chaos that was surrounding him. Guards were running to break up gambling induced fights; others were arguing their own stakes.

  Tynan was looking at him, eyes blazing, nostrils flaring. Kai closed his eyes and shrunk down when Tynan ran towards him, bracing for impact. Tynan hit him hard, dragging Kai off the floor and flinging him over his shoulder. He was smashing through the door before the guards reacted and then they were out and running.

  “I did it,” Kai said.

  “Later,” Tynan growled.

  He picked Kai up and dumped him on top of a horse, dropping him side-saddle. Kai spread his legs and arms, snapping the chains and swiveling to sit astride the animal. Tynan tossed the rein to him and smacked the horse’s ass. Moments later, Kai was charging through the streets.

  “Go!” Tynan shouted, and Kai was off, looking behind him as Tynan was swarmed with guards.

  Others were mounting up, and so he rode on, no idea where he was going. If he could get to the forest, the wolves might protect him, but that was at least an hour
’s journey working the horse to its limit. He wasn’t going to let the animal die for him.

  He slowed when he reached the outskirts of the city, bringing the horse down to a trot. He looked behind him. Tynan was nowhere in sight, but the guards were coming up behind. Kai slowed the horse to a stop, put his hands up in the air, and let them come.

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  It had taken sixteen men to subdue Tynan, but he had succumbed after taking a brick to the head. When he woke up in Bradrick’s caged wagon, he knew there was no trial for him. He was going straight to jail.

  “You’re awake?”

  Tynan rolled over to see Kai sat in the corner looking at him. Tynan sat up slowly, still feeling a little dizzy, and reached out to touch Kai’s leg. He felt real.

  “What are you doing here?” he asked, hoping Bradrick wasn’t about to ask him what he was doing talking to himself.

  Kai shrugged. “I knew they had you, and I didn’t want to run off without explaining.”

  “Go on then.”

  “I killed him,” he said. “I killed Timothy’s lover.”

  Tynan stood up and tried the bars on the cage. He didn’t want to talk to Kai about this. He had wanted to remember the good stuff and the hope he’d had. He didn’t want to think he had loved a killer.

  “Did you hear me? I killed him.”

  “I thought you were his lover,” Tynan said, hoping this was some sort of metaphor and Kai was just stringing this out for the drama.

  “I wasn’t the man he loved. That was Wendell. Timothy asked me to take Wendell to bed while he was out hunting, and I guess Wendell’s heart wasn’t good because they found him dead the next morning.”

  “How did you kill him?”

  Kai hesitated, but admitted, “I don’t know. I’d never even met Wendell; I’d have no reason to kill him. He was just some minor noble that used to visit once a month and spend the whole time in Timothy’s bedroom. They wanted me to go in his room in the pitch black of night, and he was waiting, fully prepared. He was a total pig bottom, kind of kinky too. It was meant to be fun. I only took a day from him.”

  Still no lies, but so much guilt. Tynan leaned back against the bars and looked down at Kai. He’d seen this before, good people blaming themselves for things outside their control. “That doesn’t sound like your fault.”

  “It sure felt like it was.” Kai sighed. “I never had anyone die on me before. I’m not that sort of demon. I’ve spent my whole life not being that sort of demon. I was shaken up.”

  Tynan sat down next to Kai and put an arm around him. “It wasn’t your fault. If he was alive when you left, you can’t blame yourself.”

  “He was alive. I thought I only took a day, but I must have seriously weakened him somehow. He can’t have lived for long after I left.”

  In Tynan’s mind, Kai was innocent. He knew there was no malice in Kai. He put his hand on Kai’s chin and turned it so they were looking at each other. Kai was still handsome, still infuriating, and still worthy of defending, even in that courtroom when Tynan thought he was a killer.

  Tynan loved him.

  “You’ve given up your life for me,” Kai said, clearly forcing a smile.

  “It was only a job.”

  “A job and a home.”

  Tynan traced his thumb over Kai’s lips. “Somewhere I kept stuff, that’s all. Spent too much time on the road to care about the place.”

  “So it cost you nothing?”

  “It’s cost me everything. But it doesn’t seem as important as you.”

  Kai chuckled. “We barely know each other.”

  “I know. Maybe I’ll regret this. But maybe we’ll be happy.”

  He leaned forward and kissed Kai, who opened up and kissed him back long and slow. And Tynan thought that Kai might be falling in love with him too.

  “You want to be happy with me?” Kai asked when Tynan finally let him go.

  “It’s better than being unhappy with you. I’ve made my decision. I go where you go now.”

  “Well, I’m on my way to the gallows right now. Or maybe the guillotine. What do you think they’ll do to me?”

  Tynan would rather not say. “They’ll execute you,” he said noncommittally.

  “Don’t sugar coat it. What do you really think?”

  “You’ve been found guilty of treason. I think they’ll quarter you, which will involve tearing your limbs off and disemboweling you. If you’re still alive at the end of that, they’ll probably put you up on the spike until you die, slowly and painfully, and then they’ll leave you up there to rot.”

  “I don’t much fancy the sound of that.”

  “Then you and I need to be ready to tear shit up when the cage door opens.”

  They were silent for awhile as the cart rolled on. Tynan took Kai’s hand, and they sat that way together for a long time, watching the fields roll by. Fields that shouldn’t have been there because they should be traveling through a gorge to the Reclusive Prince’s palace. Tynan suddenly realized they weren’t on the correct road.

  “Hey, Bradrick!” he said. He looked over at the driver and saw it wasn’t him. “Driver! What’s going on!”

  The driver looked over her shoulder at him, pushing back her dark hood. It was Lillia!

  “Lillia? Where’s Abigail?”

  “Don’t spoil the trick,” she said, winking at him. “You were about to get the big reveal.”

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  “What’s going on?” Kai asked. “This is good, right?”

  “This is very good,” Tynan said, grinning at him.

  Kai got up and looked around the cage. There were no guards around, and he had been too focused on Tynan to notice that they had disappeared. They had been there when they stopped at the inn to water the horse, and Bradrick had been there too.

  “How did you do it?” he asked, standing behind where Lillia sat driving.

  “Do what?”

  “Make Bradrick and the guard disappear.”

  She looked around and smiled sweetly at him. “If I told you, I’d have to make you disappear too.”

  Kai knew a threat when he saw it, especially when it came from a cute twenty-something with pink lipstick.

  “Alright, I’m just going to sit down, shut up, and forget this ever happened. Oh, and say ‘thank you.' Because this means a lot. Whoever you are.”

  She nodded, and they drove on for a few more minutes until another cart came into view on a crossroads up ahead.

  “That’s Abigail!” Tynan said, standing up and waving to her. “Hey!” he shouted to her! “We made it!”

  “Without my horses!” she shouted back.

  They pulled up alongside the cart. It turned out that Lillia didn’t have keys to the cage, so Kai broke it open with his bare hands, impressing everyone present. Tynan looked particularly proud, and Kai liked to imagine that he was fighting back the urge to boast that Kai was his boyfriend. That’s what Kai would have been doing were their roles reversed.

  Money changed hands. These were smart women who knew their worth and expected to be paid for a good job done—no false modesty here. Tynan seemed to think they were worth every penny and a bonus. But as he watched Tynan count out two hundred pounds, it seemed a hefty price to pay even for their lives and freedom.

  “How about one hundred?” he said, indicating the first bag of coins.

  “How about three hundred?” Lillia replied.

  “It’s not your money,” Abigail said, directing her words at both of them. “Tynan and I have negotiated this price. Let’s stick to it.”

  Deal done, they parted ways. The women headed back to Belmon while Tynan and Kai traveled east on Tynan’s cart to Oppenporte.

  “I can’t believe you gave her two hundred pounds,” Kai said as the cart rolled up the road. “That could have kept us for a couple of months.”

  Tynan snorted. “I should have known you’d be expensive too.”

  “What?” Kai said, wriggling h
is way under Tynan’s arm. “You’re the man I’m going to spend the rest of eternity with. Inflation happens.”

  Tynan tickled Kai’s waist and planted a kiss on his temple. “Eternity, huh? I must have been hit on the head real hard because I’m thinking you’re going to be a good companion. Better than being on my own on the road at any rate.”

  Kai felt his stomach sink. “You want me bounty hunting?”

  “No. I’m giving that up. But I don’t mean you’d be a good business partner. You’d be a terrible one. I’m just happy to keep you around in general.”

  Romance wasn’t dead after all. “And here was me thinking you find me annoying,” Kai said with a happy sigh.

  “Oh, you are. There’s no denying that.”

  “But you like me anyway.”

  “Yeah. Because that’s your dumb defense mechanism and the real you is a decent man.”

  Tynan had the measure of Kai and still liked him. Was there any greater proof they were meant for each other than that?

  “Do you want to know what I think about you?” Kai asked.

  “Not particularly.”

  “I think you are a grumpy, uncivilized beast. I also think you are as soft as baby shit on the inside and one of the most respectful men I know.”

  “So?”

  Kai grinned at him. “So I’d imagine you’d be quite a good person to try and build a life with and that’s why I’m tagging along.”

  “I need to write this shit down so I can remember it next time you’re winding me up,” Tynan chuckled.

  Kai gave him a playful whack and burrowed deeper into the embrace. “Just shut up and accept how damn lucky you are,” he said, burying his face against a slab of linen covered pectoral.

  He was surprised a moment later when Tynan picked him up with one arm and moved him onto his lap.

  “I know I’m lucky you love me,” Tynan growled tenderly. That certainly was a strange tone of voice.

  “I intend to spend eternity tolerating you,” Kai teased. “I didn’t say anything about love.”

  “You didn’t have to. You’ve said everything else.”

  “If you think that I’m—”