by Alicia Rae
Colton’s arms banded around my middle as he caught me. His proximity combined with the familiarity and warmth of his touch had me gasping for air and grasping the front of his shirt with equal force.
“Shh…” He rubbed his thumbs in a soothing gesture, sending awareness trickling up and down my spine. “You okay?”
“A giant mouse just crawled over my foot,” I rasped. “I’m definitely not okay.”
I might be a country girl, but there were no exceptions for mice. They were creepy and disgusting, and the fact that they could crawl anywhere and everywhere they wanted made it that much worse. I once read those little rodents could fit through a hole the size of a dime.
“At least it wasn’t a rat,” Colton said, cutting into my mini panic attack.
“If it were a rat, you’d be deaf by now from my screams, and then you would have had to catch me before I fainted and split my head open on the concrete floor.”
Colton bent forward and nuzzled into my neck, laughing softly. The feel of his breath hitting my bare skin had me gravitating toward him.
“I’ll always catch you, Paige,” he said.
And just like that, I was reminded of how close we were standing to one another. His scent washed over me, diminishing my anxiety. It was simply him and me with his arms wrapped around me, calming me.
Oh, how I’ve missed him, his presence, his touch, and his love for me.
He was my piece of serenity in the raging storm we’d found ourselves in.
As quickly as the warmth had come, it was gone. Colton had made a small gap between us, and I found myself standing alone.
When I questioningly gazed at him, I saw the longing in his eyes seconds before his expression went unreadable. It made my chest ache. I hated the distance he’d put between us.
“We should keep going,” he told me.
I blinked and offered a small smile to hide my embarrassment of him withdrawing from me.
“Okay,” I murmured. It was then I noticed my hand was empty. The light in front of me came from Colton’s flashlight, not my own, so I asked, “Where’s my flashlight?”
The corner of his mouth lifted as his hand pointed above us. “You must have thrown it up there when the mouse tried to eat you,” he teased.
I ignored his attempt to make fun of me and followed his arm up to see my flashlight shining at the wall from atop the hay bales. “Oh, crap. How am I going to get that?”
“Here. Take this.” He stepped forward and handed me his flashlight. “I’ll be right back.”
He was already striding toward the front end of the trailer by the hitch ball. The first row of bales were only stacked five tall, so Colton hopped up onto the trailer and then started to maneuver his way higher. I watched in amazement, wishing I were that skilled. Then, my eyes landed on the way his denim jeans hugged his ass with every movement. Desire washed over me as though I were having a hot flash.
“Got it,” Colton called from above with my flashlight in hand.
Once he returned to the concrete floor and stood in front of me, he and I swapped lights.
“I think we’ve scoped out this building enough. We should keep moving to the others. It’s getting late.”
“All right.” I raised my hand toward the exit. “Lead the way.”
Over the course of the next hour and a half, we checked out the other two buildings. One held more equipment while the other contained solely farming machinery for corn, wheat, and beans. It became apparent our moods were shifting as we were running into a dead end.
A thought struck me as I paced alongside Colton. “What about the horse barn? It’s the only place we haven’t been to, and you never know, he might have something in there that could be useful to us.”
“I don’t think so, but since we came all this way, we might as well take a look,” Colton agreed.
I could tell by his tone that he was becoming frustrated. I was, too, but we had to keep searching.
When we walked into the horse barn, the two of us came to a standstill. It was the most elegant, top-notch, largest horse barn I’d ever been inside of. The first aisle held horse stalls on either side with a vast riding arena located in the center. Elaborate horse jumps were strategically placed throughout the tilled arena. Two tack rooms were at the front of the structure with a small walkway leading to what I presumed to be another aisle of stalls.
“How about I search the tack room to the left, and you take the one on the right?” Colton suggested.
“Okay. I’ll let you know if I find anything.”
Colton nodded before we parted ways. I pointed my flashlight in front of me and crossed to my destination. At the entrance, I stepped up onto the raised wooden floorboard. An impressive number of Western and English saddles were hung on racks lining the expansion of the far wall. Some of them appeared to be used for leisure riding, whereas others were premium show saddles. There were even small ones for children.
To my right hung an array of fancy leather show halters, riding helmets, lead and training ropes, and much more.
I turned to check out the last wall on my left, and four silver metal shelving units caught my attention. I ambled toward them to see each contained usual horse aids, including anything from hoof care and bandages to horse shampoos and saddle conditioners.
The room was full of typical horse gear. I didn’t find anything out of the ordinary.
A boot clunked against the wood. At the unexpected noise, I hastily spun around and threw myself backward. My torso crashed into something hard. The unmistakable sound of glass clattering reverberated throughout the room as I locked eyes with Colton.
“Jeez! You nearly scared me to death!” I exclaimed, trying to remain quiet.
“Me?” Colton laughed and raised his brows as he neared. “All I did was step into the room. You are the one who is so jumpy.” He tsked me with a devilish smirk plastered across his face. “I don’t think you are cut out for dangerous nighttime escapades.”
I glared over at him. “Other than the mouse incident”—I tilted my head—“and you sneaking up on me, I’ve been a perfectly good sport.”
Colton’s laughter deepened, and his shoulders rose and fell with amusement. Not giving him the satisfaction of my grin, I spun around to see what damage I’d caused in my moment of fright. A small black refrigerator was propped up on an old TV stand. Because its color blended in with the surroundings, I hadn’t even noticed it was near the end of the shelving units until now.
“Oh, man, I hope I didn’t break anything.” I lifted one hand to open the refrigerator door while using my other to flash some light, so I could inspect the area.
Colton appeared next to me as I scanned the contents inside. Several orange medicine containers on the lower level had been knocked over. I stuck my hand inside to right them. Multiple clear tubes of horse sperm were toppled over above, so I set those upright, too, praying I hadn’t cracked any of the glass bottles open.
Taking a second glance, one label caught my attention. I snatched it while reading Bentley Go Lucky in handwriting that I could identify time and time again without error. It was Colton’s.
“Oh my gosh…” I murmured in utter shock. “This is…no, it can’t be Bentley’s sperm.” I whipped my head over to Colton to see his entire body going rigid with unmistakable fury. “Is this your Bentley?”
Colton’s arms dropped to his sides, and his hands balled into fists. “Yes, it would seem so.”
I shook my head from side to side in disbelief that someone could be so callous. “But that would mean—”
“That son of a bitch came into my barn and stole it,” Colton cut in.
Blinking rapidly, I glanced back and read the next sticker, Big Brown, but I didn’t recognize the writing. Then, I saw Unusual Mystic Heat, and that tube’s handwriting mirrored the one with Bentley’s name.
“Wait,” I breathed, gesturing to the tube. “Isn’t that one of your horses, too?”
Colton leaned forw
ard to get a better look. “Yes, and so is Magic Thunder, Hard to Get—” He broke off, too infuriated to read the rest of the labels. He gritted his teeth and glanced away. “They are all here—all seven of the tubes that were in my barn the night of the fire.”
He slightly backed up, nearly trembling with rage. “Paige, I have to get out of here before I do something I’ll regret,” he added in warning.
If I didn’t know Colton personally and how sweet and loving he was, I would have been scared of his current state. But I did, and I loved him with my whole heart, so my instincts kicked into high gear.
I set my hands on Colton’s shoulders and gently pushed him back a few steps. “Stay right here, and don’t you dare leave me alone. Give me ten seconds, and we’ll be on our way.”
Leaving no time for him to argue with me, I pivoted around on the heels of my boots and grabbed my camera out of my jeans. I used my free hand to pick up the remaining overturned tubes of sperm. I faced the labels toward me, and then I started snapping pictures without delay. I wasn’t sure if my images would be considered evidence in linking Hank to the arson, but just in case, I refused to leave until I had several photos. I contemplated snatching the tubes, so I could bring them back to the ranch. However, horse sperm had to sustain a particular temperature, and I didn’t want to risk damaging them.
After taking at least ten pictures, I returned to Colton where I nudged him through the open door and out of the barn. “All right, let’s go home.”
Once beneath the dark blue sky, I inhaled the cool evening air in hopes of clearing my mind, so I could get us out of here without being discovered.
We quickly approached the same gate from where we’d come. As I was about to start climbing it, Colton’s steps behind me faltered until he eventually came to a complete stop. Then, he rested his forearms on the top metal bar and hung his head.
Inside, I ached for Colton, and I understood how angry and bitter he must feel at the present moment. But I also knew if he marched up to Hank’s doors in the middle of the night to accost him about what we’d found, it would end badly for Colton and me since we were trespassing on Hank’s property.
I needed to calm Colton’s anger, so I looped my arm through his larger one and leaned into him. “Colton, I know what you are thinking, and I can’t let you confront Hank—not tonight. We need to find another way to make sure Hank is punished for his actions and to rightfully take back the sperm tubes he stole.”
I waited and waited for Colton to speak, but he didn’t. I could feel his fury rolling off his tense body.
“Colton,” I pleaded, caressing his upper arm, “please talk to me.”
Eventually, Colton exhaled in a rush and glanced sideways at me. “Do you have any idea how much rage and anger and hate I have coursing through my veins right now?”
Those emotions I saw in Colton were what I feared the most. “Yes,” I answered, my voice barely above a whisper.
“I have never felt so damn fucking violent in my life than I do right now.” He clenched his jaw and tightly gripped the gate with his palms as he continued, “It is taking everything that I have, everything that I am, not to break down his fucking door and beat him until he begs me for mercy and forgiveness.” His breaths deepened with every word. “And even then, I’m not sure I’d have it in me to forgive him for what he has done to me, to my home.”
I winced. Never in my twenty years of loving Colton had I ever heard him talk so venomously, and I wished like hell that I could take all his burdens away and bring the light back into his handsome baby-blue eyes.
I gave Colton some time to collect himself as I ran my thumb back and forth along his bicep, hoping my touch held the power to calm or soothe him in the way he always did for me.
“Colton, there aren’t enough words to ease the loss you’ve suffered.” I gently grasped his chin and turned his face to look at me. “But I know in my heart, the man I fell in love with many, many years ago would never inflict such pain on another human being.” I stroked the base of his jaw, feeling his light stubble. “You’re too kind and good and far too strong to stoop to Hank’s level. You can’t take justice upon yourself. You have to let the law serve it.”
Colton was quiet as a slight breeze suddenly blew around us. “I’ll never forget what it felt like to have the fire marshal show up on my doorstep and tell me that I was the victim of arson.”
My stomach rolled. I was saddened that I hadn’t been there for Colton when the conversation with the fire marshal took place. Soon after the fire had happened, Colton and I were on the same page, speculating the fire had been deliberately set, but that couldn’t have made dealing with the truth of it any less painful.
I skimmed my hand down the length of his arm and twined my fingers with his. A tear slid down my cheek when I looked up at him. “I’m so sorry you’re going through this, Colton. But I promise I’ll do everything in my power to help, and I’ll be here for you in any way I can.”
A wave of emotions passed through Colton’s eyes, but I mostly saw regret.
“That’s just it, Paige. I don’t want you anywhere near me right now.” He broke our connection and looked away, gazing out at the pasture. “I can’t allow you to get caught in the middle if things turn for the worse.”
He stood to his full height, and I knew our conversation was over.
“Come on. You need to get home.” Colton mounted the gate.
I blinked away the increasing moisture in my eyes and swallowed back my feelings. His harsh words had hit me harder than they should have.
Once on the other side, he outstretched a helping hand to me while staring at me. For a brief second, I considered taking his offer. Then, I thought better of it. I was tired of him pushing me away whenever he wanted, so I climbed over the gate by myself and kept walking.
I let my indignation increase my strides.
“Paige…” Colton said at my back, his tone laced with warning.
“Don’t.”
His long legs kept pace with me better than I preferred. “Paige, I didn’t mean for what I said to come across that way.”
“No, you did,” I countered, not looking at him. “And I get it. Really, I do. When the going got tough with my accident with Missy this past year, I pushed you away. Now, our situations are horribly reversed, so it’s only fair you do the same to me since I set the precedent.”
“That is not true.”
“Oh, it is.” Several yards from the hot-wired fence, I stopped abruptly and whirled around to face him. “As you put it on the day you said good-bye to me, I already gave up on our fate.”
Colton’s eyes bore into mine, causing my heart rate to speed up uncontrollably. “Surely, you know I didn’t mean that either.”
“I don’t know what to believe anymore,” I admitted, stifling the overwhelming urge to cry.
Colton didn’t respond, so I headed for the fence where I lowered myself to the ground and Army-crawled across to the other side.
As I came to the edge of the road, I sensed Colton following in my shadow even though he never spoke a word. I tugged my bottom lip between my teeth and began to walk en route to my car.
The silence was unnerving.
My vehicle finally came into view up the street, and I noticed Colton was parked right behind me.
I hesitated at my car door and peeked over my shoulder at him. “I guess this is good-bye again,” I murmured softly. The reality of saying such a thought out loud hit me like a ten-thousand-pound brick wall.
Ever so slowly, Colton closed the space between us and placed his hands on my waist. I caught a fleeting glimpse of a heartbreakingly raw expression in his desolate eyes, and it stole my breath. This man was grieving and suffering, and it shattered my soul that he wouldn’t let me in to ease his pain.
He nuzzled his lips against my cheek and murmured, “I’m so sorry, Paige.” Then, he kissed me just once.
He let me go all over again and left me standing there, on the sid
e of the road, as I watched him walk down the pavement toward his truck.
Tears cascaded down my cheeks as the pain of losing him a second time washed over me.
ONCE INSIDE MY TRUCK, I released a long breath that I felt like I’d been holding since I first learned Paige was here at Hank’s estate, undoubtedly putting herself at risk.
Paige is safe.
I made a tight fist and smashed it straight into my steering wheel. All I wanted was for Paige to stay out of this mess and remain in the protection of her parents’ house, yet I’d found her in the middle of harm’s way tonight.
When I’d first sent Paige home after the fire and said good-bye to her, I should have known better than to expect her to go quietly. Paige was a fighter, and she was fiercely loyal to those she loved.
The sentiment had me torn between wanting to kiss her senseless for standing by my side or chide her for endangering herself for me. But here I was, doing neither.
Paige suddenly started her car and turned on her headlights. As she drove off, I stayed behind for several minutes and studied my surroundings to make sure no one had caught wind of us.
The coast was clear. There was not a single indication that Paige and I had been noticed meddling around the premises. So, I fired up my truck and pulled onto the street while doing one last sweep of the area.
Although nearing the driveway of my ranch, I kept going straight. I needed to make sure that Paige had made it home safe and sound. If Hank was capable of arson, who knew what else he’d do to cover his tracks? The possibility of something happening to Paige over my fight with Hank left an unbearable fear of the unknown lurking in my gut.
I pulled off the main road near Paige’s home and parked my truck. An overwhelming sense of relief filled me when I saw she’d made it home. All the lights on the property were off, and nothing seemed to be out of the ordinary.
Except for the lonely ache I felt inside.
I’d barely eaten or slept in four days. In this moment, I just wanted Paige. Nothing else mattered.