Origin

by Dani Worth

  Jarana scowled. “I’m working on that. But Lux can put it off, lie about engine trouble or whatever.” She held out her arms to the baby who made a sweet, happy noise and lunged toward her.

  I decided the scary Gwinarian wasn’t so scary after all as she kissed and snuggled her daughter close.

  “We put your bags in by the shower, so you’ll have your clothes. There are a lot of people coming to greet you when we arrive. I’m not the only one who enjoyed that footage.” Jarana laughed when her daughter poked her in the nose. Must have been hard because she blinked as her eyes watered. She turned away. “Let’s get this going. I’m ready to be home. Can’t wait to see how Lux is dealing with her pregnancy.”

  “Lux pregnant scares me,” the Replicant was saying as he followed her. He gave me a smile over his shoulder and several earrings along the top of his ear sparkled. “Bye, Freckles.”

  “Maska, you survived me pregnant. How worse could Lux be?”

  “True,” he answered as they reached the doorway.

  Clay glared at the Replicant’s back. “I really don’t like the way he was looking at Siri.”

  “I don’t like the nickname. Who said he could give you a nickname?” Anders stepped up beside Clay, his eyes shooting daggers at where the Replicant had been.

  Jealousy was good, I decided. It meant I was one step closer to getting what I wanted. Waking up every damned day with them in my bed.

  Flying through the debris fields turned out to be scarier than the damned crate. Jarana flew silently, all her focus zeroed in on getting us around the huge chucks of rock and floating debris. Seeing the remains of the devastation to my planet kept me quiet too. I finally had to close my eyes, but I forced myself to open them once we stopped swerving. I kept them opened wide as we drew closer to land.

  Massive trees unlike any others on known planets showed first, their variegated leaves forming a cushion of blues in all shades. I caught sight of a waterfall behind what I assumed was the new main tube and pod system.

  There weren’t many—it was nothing like the cities I remembered from before, but it looked so much better than I expected.

  When Jarana brought the ship to a halt on the loading dock, she finally spoke. “Yeah, she’s obviously pregnant.”

  I unstrapped myself from the seat and stood to look out. The woman from the vidscreens, Lux, was bent over a waste receptacle, and from the way her body jerked, heaving really hard. I winced, watched as a big dark-haired man rubbed her back.

  Then I noticed all the Gwinarians who had gathered in the large area behind Lux and the man. Maybe fifty or so.

  My heart stuttered, then picked up to race like crazy.

  I was home.

  The damned shaking started and I didn’t even hesitate to do the one thing I needed right then. I moved around the seat I’d been in and crawled into Anders’s lap. Clay reached over to clasp my hand, stroked his thumb over my knuckles.

  Nobody said anything and the quiet didn’t bother me. I was too overcome by the wild tangle of emotions rushing through me, tripping over each other, racing to be the first to cause tears. A part of me hated this weakness, but the bigger part offered a pass this time. Fourteen years of wishing to return home, to find out where I came from—who I came from—and to be facing it now.

  I was so thankful to be doing this with Clay and Anders there to support me. So thankful to know I could lean on them—that they wanted me to.

  Jarana passed us and I caught a small smile she aimed at me before she stepped off the bridge. I wondered what her return to Kithra had been like. Something told me hers was probably as traumatic. Something also told me she probably handled it on her own without crawling into a big man’s lap.

  I tightened my arms around Anders’s neck, glad he was there.

  “You ready to put your feet on Kithra, sweetheart?” Anders hugged me.

  “As soon as I’m through soaking up some of your strength,” I muttered into his hair. We’d all used the same shampoo—a sort of spicy scent I couldn’t describe—and it smelled fantastic on him.

  His chuckled rumbled against my chest. “Take what you need.” He kissed my temple.

  “I can’t believe how much work they’ve done here.” Clay stood and walked to the window. “This is the first time we’ve been back since before the explosions. I’d expected it to look worse.”

  “The Company is motivated.” Anders shifted on the seat. “Kithronite prices are beyond high. So much money to be made.”

  I finally lifted my head and smiled at him.

  “Got enough?” he asked.

  I nodded and climbed off his lap. “Let’s go. Most of these people are probably waiting to see Crichton.”

  “Or you.” Clay turned and walked behind me as we left the deck. “It’s my understanding that most Gwinarians come to greet each new one returning home. Warrant or not, these people consider you family.”

  I halted and blinked back sudden hot tears. “That’s lovely.”

  Jarana’s husbands had already loaded the crate holding Crichton onto a hover dolly, but they waited until I walked ahead of them with Clay and Anders. I was holding both their hands as I put my foot back onto my home for the first time in fourteen years.

  The crowd erupted into a cheer and when someone grabbed me and hugged me, old panic rushed to my chest and I froze, turning a frantic gaze to Clay. He frowned and peeled the young Gwinarian woman off me and stepped in front of me before another one could step in.

  “Listen up, everyone,” he yelled. He had to whistle loudly before the group quieted. “This is Siri and she’s very happy to be home but she isn’t ready for all the touching.”

  “Was that really necessary?” I muttered, my cheeks on fire.

  “Yep,” Anders said. “It was.” He tightened his fingers on mine. “You’re going to need time to acclimate, get used to your freedom in addition to being home.”

  “I’ve been free on your ship for some time now.”

  “But here, you’ll be truly free. On your own. With your own people.”

  The Gwinarians around me faded out as his words sank into my heart. They planned to leave me. My space pirates were going to fly off on their adventures together. No more snuggling in a warm bed between them, no more kisses. No more watching one unravel the other.

  I let go of Anders’s hand and swallowed the huge lump of agony in my throat.

  He frowned.

  Facing the crowd of strangers, I held my head high and smiled at everyone who came up to greet me. Nobody seemed put out by Clay’s announcement, all seemed just as happy to see me as they had been before. Inside, my heart felt like it was breaking into crumbs, but I managed to swallow back the waves of hurt and focus on my surroundings. After seeing only one Gwinarian in my years as a slave, the sea of copper, red and auburn hair around me was welcome.

  Then I spotted the light color some Gwinarians had—the one close to blond.

  The man stepped up to me and the smile that stretched his lips was so familiar, my heart knocked against my ribs as memories came flooding back. “Kei!” This time, I reached out and grabbed. I wrapped my arms around his neck as I remembered that he’d been my best friend for something like five years before I was taken off planet. Images of sleepovers at my place filled my head along with memories of his quirks. How he liked these little furry creatures called leetos that came up to knock on the dome walls. How he adored this awful brown vegetable that I couldn’t remember the name of. “You look so different. All grown up.”

  His arms had closed around me. Tight. “Siri, the sun is bright on Kithra today.” He breathed the words into my hair.

  That was the traditional Gwinarian greeting to a loved one. I finally pulled back. “I remember you. I remember so much about you. We were best friends.” I grinned.

  He blinked, his gaze locking on my mouth and I didn’t imagine the growl that came from either Anders or Clay behind me. I ignored them, still annoyed they thought they were going
to fly off without me.

  “You grew up to be beautiful, Siri,” Kei said. “I’m so glad to have you home.” He ran his palms down my arms to clasp my hands. “I can’t wait to show you your pod and everything else we’ve done around here. Come.”

  I started to follow him, then stopped to look over my shoulder. “Coming?” I asked Anders and Clay.

  Both men stood frozen and I caught a fleeting glimpse of pain come and go in Anders’s expression so fast, I nearly missed it. His gaze went to Kei and then he looked at Clay, who nodded back to him.

  “What?” I asked. “What in the galaxies are you two communicating here? And why am I not included in this? We’re still together, right? Until you leave me?”

  They didn’t answer quickly enough.

  I frowned, took one step toward them, my lungs freezing in my chest. “Right?” I whispered, knowing they wouldn’t be able to hear me over the crowd of Gwinarians and humans around us. But they could read my lips, see my expression.

  “Right,” Clay mouthed back. He grabbed Anders’s arm and pulled him along.

  When they reached me, I stepped close so only they could hear me. I looked from one to the other, hugging my arms to my chest. “I may know Kei and might be remembering other things about my childhood and my home, but I still need you both right now.”

  Anders nodded and waved Kei on, telling him silently to proceed.

  The path tubes were exactly as I remembered. Clear with living walls of color behind them. Blue leaves, red tawnlet flowers, then the green and black vordun flowers—like the blanket Anders had gifted me. Kei took me to where I’d be living first and showed me the door had already been coded to my palm.

  “Sorry, it’s so small,” he said as the door panel slid open. “But we have a lot of Gwinarians coming home and it’s crowded. I heard about where you’ve been and didn’t think you’d want to share living quarters. So you’ll have this one to yourself.” His smile this time held a hint of shyness and even anticipation. “For a short time hopefully.”

  I blinked, wondering if I was reading him wrong. Neither Clay nor Anders said anything and the silence grew awkward. I shuffled my feet, looked down at the baggy pants and long-sleeved brown shirt—I still preferred to wear the clothes that covered most of my body—and then brushed past Kei.

  The pod was small compared to the ones I remembered from my childhood, but the main room could hold three of my bunkroom on the ship. The cover to the dome was open, letting me see all the beautiful Kithran foliage. A blue couch curved around one side of the room, facing a large vidscreen. I walked to the first doorway on my left to find a small kitchen with pretty white counters and appliances I had no idea how to use.

  “We stocked your kitchen, so you’ll be able to eat at home.” Kei followed me into the room. “I hope you’ll join us in the dining pods sometimes. There are so many friends I can’t wait for you to meet.”

  He had dark eyes, more brown than amber and they stood out against his light hair.

  “Come.” He held out his hand. “I’ll show you the sleeping pod. It surprised me because I expected it to be smaller.”

  I started to take his hand but noticed my pirates leaning on either side of the door opening. Neither looked happy or comfortable. Both watched me closely as if each was trying to make sure I was going to be okay here.

  I’d be better if they were staying. The more I walked here on Kithra the more I’d realized it was possible I wouldn’t be able to leave that easily. But I didn’t want them away from me either. While the thought of adventures out in space with them still made my heart race with excitement, a bigger part of me would rather they stay here. With me. My heart needed to reconnect with home, needed to learn more about my family.

  Hopeless—it felt so hopeless. Yet I’d learned something important about myself since they’d stormed into Para Lashin’s room on the entertainment ship. I was stronger and more determined than I’d thought.

  Kei dropped his hand when I never took it, but his smile was still friendly and welcoming. He turned and walked between Anders and Clay. I followed but stopped when I was between them to look at one then the other. I held out my hands to them. Anders took one first. Clay stared at me until my cheeks heated and I lowered my hand. “So, what do you think of this place?” I asked him.

  He stepped close and his body’s heat washed over me, making me close my eyes. “What do you think? That’s the important thing here.”

  “I like it, though—” I broke off, tightened my fingers on Anders’s.

  “Though?” Anders prompted.

  Kei walked back to us. I guess he wasn’t picking up on the tension because he kept talking. “I’m sorry you don’t have your own workout section here, but we have air treds and virtual weights in several gyms now. We also just opened up one of the pools. It’s by the main greenhouse pod.” His smile was bright. “Kithra is coming together so fast. It’s very exciting.”

  I looked back at Clay, who still stood with his body brushing against my arm. Something filled his blue eyes, something that looked a lot to me like love. He shook his head and threaded his hand with my free one.

  “Kei, is my bed built for only one?” I asked.

  Light reddish-blond eyebrows rose and he obviously tried and failed to hide his disappointment as he glanced at our entwined hands. “You probably don’t remember, but all beds on Kithra are built for family additions.” His smile, faintly sad, twisted my heart.

  Though I felt bad that he’d apparently developed—quickly—some hope of us being together, I didn’t feel bad about anyone knowing I was with Clay and Anders.

  At least for now. Or forever if I could figure out a fix for us.

  Kei’s vidscreen beeped and he lifted it. The fierce curl of his lip startled me. “Seems Crichton has been installed in my med pod.”

  “You’re a medic?” I asked, though I wasn’t surprised. “I remember you wanted to be one. I’m so glad you got what you wanted.”

  “I did get what I wanted. In that respect. There are other things that eluded my grasp. Or disappeared without a trace.”

  Me. He meant me. I’d been so young when taken. “I’m sorry.”

  “It wasn’t your fault. But I missed you so much, Siri. Some of us know young what we want.” He flashed another sad smile as his screen beeped again. He grimaced. “It’s Lux. She’s not the most patient person. And lately, she’s been my constant patient with that pregnancy.” His lips quirked at his own play on words. “And yes, I’m the chief medical officer here now.” He gripped his vidscreen. Stared at me. “I have to go but I want you to know that I’m really happy you’re home. When you disappeared, we were all devastated. Your parents were completely broken. I thought not knowing what had happened to you was the worst thing, but now that I do know, I was wrong. I’m so sorry, Siri. So, so sorry.”

  “I’m here now. Will you be able to wake Crichton so we can find out what happened to our home?”

  “I don’t know. I should have gone directly to the medical area with him, but I wanted to help you settle in because I’m the only one here you know. Or I hoped you’d know me. I’m glad you remember.”

  “Me too.”

  Kei looked at Clay. “Would the three of you like to meet me for dinner in the main dining pod? In about three hours?”

  Clay glanced at Anders, then me before nodding. “We can do that.”

  I opened my mouth to say I didn’t want to eat out, that I wanted to be here alone with them, but something held my tongue.

  I hated, absolutely hated, the new awkwardness that had cropped up between the three of us.

  Chapter Sixteen

  “It isn’t exactly the main dining pod anymore, but it’s the one we’ve been using for some time so a lot of us still meet here. The larger one has only been open a month or so.” Kei palmed open the door and waved us inside.

  Memories swamped me and I took in the massive low tables and colorful cushions piled around them and against the w
alls. There were a few bench tables built into one wall and the dome overhead showed a mass of red tawnlet flowers nestled in the trees. The scents of food—freshly cooked Kithran foods—made me close my eyes and take a deep breath.

  My stomach grumbled loudly.

  Anders chuckled and pulled me toward an empty table in the corner. He sprawled his big body out and gave me a naughty wink as he patted the cushions next to him.

  That wink gave me the first bit of hope I’d had since they’d made it plain they were going to leave me here. In the last couple of hours, we’d taken a tour and even though none of the area I’d lived in as a child had survived the blast, what they had set up was so familiar, it filled my entire body with excitement and warmth. I couldn’t wait to explore further.

  After we chose our food, I settled in beside Anders and didn’t join the conversation for a few minutes so I could enjoy the familiar tastes. I’d chosen fruit and buttery blues after that last memory of my mother. She’d loved the smooth Kithran vegetables. These came with a light cream sauce. Kei told me to trickle the sauce over the blues. The taste made me close my eyes and unfortunately moan a little. My eyes flew back open wide when I heard Anders’s softly muttered, “Fuck, Siri.”

  I held out some on my fork for him. His green gaze never left mine as he leaned forward and wrapped his lips around the food. I almost moaned again when he slowly slid back off my fork and chewed, his pleasure plain in his expression.

  Someone cleared their throat and I looked up to find three people had settled on the other side of our table. I recognized Lux, the woman we’d seen on the vidscreen. She still looked pale, though I had no way of knowing if that was how she usually looked. Her dark hair was gathered in a knot on the back of her head and she was dressed casually in a black T-shirt and Earth denim pants. Her shirt had words. Toquerian Ale—It wasn’t my fault.

  I grinned, sure I was going to like this human woman.

  She grinned back, then pointed at the men next to her. “This big lug next to me is my husband Kol and you remember my husband Egan next to him. Sorry we couldn’t show you around earlier. I had another couple of families to settle in.”