Turning to my left, I grabbed a box of tissues off of the credenza and offered it to Tina. She reached out and took a couple and began to dab at her moist eyes. I grabbed a couple for myself as well. It appeared as though rain was falling inside of my office as well as outside of it.
“Marcus,” she said, tears streaming downward. “God, how I wished that there was a better time to tell you this but I’m pregnant.”
Chapter Eighteen
If the feelings that I felt coursing through me now could be put to color, there would be a kaleidoscope of blues, reds, yellows, greens, browns, and everything else in between emanating out of me. Having just hurt a woman that I loved dearly in a betrayal of trust, here she was, sitting in front of me and telling me that she was about to have my child. Mixed emotions and colored patterns could not describe what I was feeling inside. I mean, I wanted to be happy about the pregnancy but I wanted her to be happy as well. Right now my office was the last place I’d look for signs of happiness.
“I wanted to tell you the night I came looking for you Marcus,” she said having composed herself some, still dabbing at a few remaining tears.
“Tina, I don’t know what to say,” I said coming out of my daze.
“Well, you could come over here and give me a hug.”
Okay, I thought. I’m down with that. Rising up from my chair I walked around my desk and took her by both hands and assisted her out of the chair. Taking her into my arms we stood there holding one another, slowly rocking in place.
“For all it’s worth, I love you Tina,” I said softly in her ears.
Looking up at me, she said, with parted lips, “And I love you too Marcus. And I forgive you.”
“You don’t know how much that means to me,” I said, pulling her closer.
“No, you don’t know what you mean to me,” she said as her eyes searched my eyes, first my left eye, then my right eye.
Tina and I left shortly after that. Walking her to her car I promised to call her when I returned. We hugged once more, this time in the pouring rain, nature’s rain mingling with our own rain.
Assisting her into her car, I stood in place until she had started the engine. We blew one another kisses as she backed up then took off. Turning, I walked away.
The ride over to the airport was challenging in this torrential downpour but I managed to get there in time enough to go through security and board my flight with time to spare. Within twenty minutes of my arrival we were airborne. Next stop - Gainesville, Florida.
Leïla was there waiting for me in the baggage claim area. She was all smiles as I greeted her with a hug and subdued kiss. Grabbing the overnight bag I brought along, just in case my flight was canceled and I had to stay over, we turned and walked towards the exit. She noticed that I was travelling light and asked me why. I told her that I had to return to Ft Lauderdale and would be flying out in a couple of hours from now. She gave me a puzzled look but did not press me for details. Taking her hand in mine we walked to where her car was parked.
“Are you hungry?” she asked me as we drove off.
“Not really, but I imagine I’ll need to grab something to eat,” I answered.
Less than a quarter mile later we came upon a spacious area which looked like a city park. I asked her if we could stop by there first. She pulled over and without question. But by now I sensed that she knew something was not right; not with this picture, not with me.
We parked and exited the car. Ahead of us lay a winding path that snaked its way through an outpouring of tropical trees, shrubs, and a variety of tropical plants. A pond with ducks was off to our right. Taking her hand into mine, we began to walk. At that moment I began to tell her my story, the one I had told Tina. By the time we reached a secluded area on the far side of the park, and just seconds after I told her that Tina was pregnant, she collapsed in my arms, tears pouring out of her eyes by the bucketful. My misty eyes were just as wet. Inside, my heart sank with each sob that she released in short and long bursts. Her face was a mosaic of anguish and inner conflict. As I stood there holding her I rocked her in my arms, wishing that Lady Fate had been more forgiving and more empathetic. Leïla did not deserve the pain and heartache that was ripping her heart apart and right before me. She became so distraught I had to drive her home. It took her an hour to finally come around to the point she could speak without breaking down in tears.
“It’s entirely my fault,” she said as she began to moan again. “All of it!”
Going over to the sofa where she sat, I lowered myself down beside her and wrapped my arms around her and comforted her. I was choked up myself. But I had to be strong for her and for myself. “Please, don’t beat yourself up Leïla,” I said, reliving the hurt and pain I had experienced in Tina’s arms earlier.
“Look, I am as much to blame as anyone. More so, even. Once I knew that my feelings for you were still as real as they were when we last saw one another on the island, I should have told you about Tina. I didn’t and that was wrong of me.”
“But if only my father had told you the truth Marcus, we would have gotten back together and you would not have fallen for her or anyone else.”
“That’s true, Leïla,” I said, with little other choice but to agree with her. “But things did not work out that way. Believe me, this whole thing has been tearing at my heart day in and day out ever since I held you in my arms again and kissed you. What added to my agony was the fact that I had promised to love you and for infinity plus some. And I do Leïla. I love you today as much as I loved you when I first lay eyes on you.”
“I love you Marcus, and so much it hurts,” she said, her voice trembling, “I don’t know what I am going to do.”
“Believe me, I know how much this hurts, Leïla,” I said, tears running down my face now.
Once again she broke down in a flood of tears. For the longest time, we sat holding each other, our hearts beating like jackhammers. It was painful and beyond words. For the better part of my time there, we were both inconsolable.
After a while I managed to compose myself. Still, Leïla was so distraught that I wondered whether or not I should leave her this way. I decided it probably would do more harm than good for me to hang around. Playing it safe, I called for a cab. I didn’t want her driving in her condition, and especially not in the storm system that had made its way here from the area I had just left hours earlier.
“Leïla, please baby, you have to pull yourself together,” I pleaded softly. And she finally did.
“Marcus, I don’t blame you for falling for another in my absence,” she began. “If it was I in your position, and I had done everything I could to find you and failed, not knowing that I had been lied to, like you had been, I might have fallen for another myself.”
“Leïla, my hope was to be with you throughout all time,” I said, stroking the side of her temple tenderly. “But somewhere I remember hearing that a love like ours can never die. Just try your best to remember that.”
“I will,” she said braving a smile.
Standing, I pulled her up and into my arms and kissed her on the forehead. My lips soon traveled down to her neck and the spot where she had been grazed by the bullet and then onto her moist lips. We kissed, and perhaps for the last time.
The cab arrived minutes later. It was painful, tearing my gaze from her. Though she tried her best to put on a brave smile, I knew that once she closed that door she would break down again.
Sliding into the backseat of the cab, I sat in silence, my face tormented and rife with pain. Though it was pouring down raining outside of the cab, I put on my shades to hide my strained red eyes. It hurt, God, it hurt inside. Grief could not describe the sadness that I felt as the cab driver put greater and greater distance between me and the other woman I loved. Worse, I had made a promise, one that I failed to keep. And that bothered me and to the core. Leïla, my sweet and wonderful island love; you will always dwell with me, I remembered telling her before leaving. Inside, I knew t
hat my world would not be right without her.
Once I arrived at the airport terminal, I checked in, then found a quiet corner space and sat down. And just as quietly, I fought to regain my composure. Once I did, I called my uncle to fill him in on what had transpired the past three days. I told him that Tina was pregnant, as well. All in all, he told me that I had done the right thing and he was proud of that. He said that he would get with me sometime after I returned to Ft Lauderdale. I thanked him for being there for me. In closing, I asked him to give my love to my aunt. He assured me that he would. We ended our call.
Minutes later I boarded the shuttle plane. Fifteen minutes after that we were airborne; all twenty-five of us, a flight attendant had announced as she read the number from the manifest. Seated by the window I looked out into the stormy sky. There was rain and lightning. We were engulfed in thick dark clouds. The turbulence was nerve wrecking to say the least.
Leaning back into my seat I closed my eyes and drifted off to sleep. The last thoughts I had were of Leïla and Tina and the love I had for both of them. I did not know what was going to become of my situation with Tina but I felt we could work things out. As for Leïla, the pain I felt still resided inside me. But the love we had for one another would never die. That I was certain of. She would forever be my Island Love.
Tina had just sat down on the sofa ready to eat a Reuben Rye sandwich she had made when the storm decided to dissipate. It had been a long and emotional day. Marcus had hurt her and deeply and it would take a while for her to get over the pain but since she had found it in her heart to forgive him, she was willing to try. And now that she was carrying his child, it made sense that she’d give him a second chance. Besides, she never wanted to be a single mother. She had been raised believing that the most productive and most stable children came from stable homes and that such children greatly benefited when both parents were collectively involved in their childrearing. She was determined that this was going to be a group effort. Finally, she thought, she’d get to see what all the fuss about being pregnant was. She’d get to see what it felt like to feel her baby moving and kicking around inside of her. She’d also get to see what weird food combinations she’d find herself craving for. Most of all, she’d get to see Marcus in the role as father. She couldn’t wait to see him change his first diaper. The thought brought a smile to her face.
Looking at the clock on the wall she reasoned that Marcus was airborne and headed back to Ft Lauderdale. She’d make things right, she thought. The love was there and the love was strong. Picking up the remote she turned to her favorite show and watched it until she drifted off to sleep.
She was startled two hours later by the ringing of her smartphone. Rising up, she glanced over at the wall mounted clock and saw that it was closing in on 10:00PM. It was Marcus she told herself picking up the phone, then looking at the number. But why would he be calling from his office phone she wondered. Placing the phone to her ear she answered it.
“Hello,” she said, ready to hear his deep voice.
“Hello is this Tina Marie Cortez?” a voice asked on the other end, a voice belonging to a woman. There was something about the woman’s tone. She sounded troubled.
“Yes, it is,” Tina answered sitting upright on the sofa.
“My name is Juanita Waller. I’m Marcus’ assistant,” she said. “I am not sure if you have been watching the news but Marcus’ plane went down just outside of Ft Lauderdale about thirty minutes ago. His uncle asked me to contact you as soon as possible. I searched Marcus’ desk area but could not find your number. So I contacted your job and got it after I told them the situation.”
“What are you saying?” Tina asked, collapsing against the back of the chair in disbelief. “I mean, are there any survivors? Tell me something please! I have to know.”
“We don’t know at this time, but we will call you as soon as we know something,” Juanita said in a sad tone. “I am sorry to have to break this news to you like this. Marcus’ uncle is on his way from Tampa now. I’m sure he’ll be in touch with you when he arrives. Know that we are praying for his safe return.”
“Okay,” was all Tina could utter as she sat there alone and close to going into a state of shock.
“You take care, now.”
The call ended.
Tina shook her head and uttered something in Spanish before she hugged herself tightly. Staring into the distance, her eyes began to well with hot tears and her body began to shake uncontrollably.
“Oh, no, no, no nooo,” she wailed, dropping the phone on the sofa. “Oh my God, please don’t let my Marcus be gone. Oh God, don’t let this be true. Don’t let it be true….”
Chapter Nineteen
The following morning, every local and national network news station carried coverage of the downed shuttle plane and rescue effort. Updates flashed across the airwaves on an ongoing basis. Because of the heavily wooded area the aircraft went down in and the torrential downpour at the time of the crash, it took a while for rescuers to come upon the crash site. Working throughout the night bodies were recovered and transported to the county morgue. Though the latest reports indicated that a robust rescue effort was still underway, there had been no reports of survivors throughout the night.
Leïla had overslept due to the sedative she had taken the night before. It was the only way she could fall asleep. After taking a warm shower she dressed, fixed herself a cup of coffee, then headed over to the campus. Maybe by lunchtime she’d have an appetite, she thought. Right now she had a report to work on and needed to do some research at the library. Her heart wasn’t in it but she had decided that she had to get on with her life. How she was going to accomplish this, she was clueless.
After parking her car she made her way over to the library. Along the way she overheard a group of students talking about a plane crash that had occurred the night before. She didn’t give it much thought and continued her walk until she came across a stack of The Miami Herald newspapers just inside of the main lobby of the library. They were free and there for students to take. She happened to glance at one in passing when she paused and took a step back. Picking up a paper, she saw the bold print of the headline: Gainesville Shuttle Plane Crashes In Ft Lauderdale. No Survivors!
Visibly shaken, Leïla fought desperately to maintain her composure. Bringing the paper closer to her moist eyes, she attempted to mine the article for information but two paragraphs into it the paper slipped out of her hands as she closed her eyes and began to tremble. Softly she began to utter “Marcus, oh my dear Marcus.” This she repeated several times, each time uttering the phrase louder than the previous time until she let out a mournful cry. Hearing her outcry, a library assistant and several students rushed to her side and caught her just as she was about to collapse. Looking at the newspaper headline and her dire state of distress, they deduced that she had possibly lost a loved one on the flight that had crashed.
Easing her limp form down onto a nearby chair, an ambulance was called and she was medevac to Shands Hospital. There she was hospitalized and treated for severe shock and depression. Three days later she was released. Two of her close friends arrived at the hospital to accompany her home. They could see that the pain she felt was indescribable, her sorrow deep. One of the friends stayed with her overnight to console her. The following morning her parents were scheduled to fly in, having gotten word of her hospitalization the day before. They would take over her recovery from that point on, they had told her over the phone.
Leïla spent the night resting and thinking about the man she had lost, and twice in the same day. As That’s The Way Of the World by Earth, Wind, & Fire played on the stereo, she shared memories of her and Marcus with her friend. She talked about their unique introduction and the times they spent together, especially on their private little island paradise. At times she would pause to sing a few lines of the song. It was the extended version of the song, as well as a very moving ballad, one that brought a flood of memories to th
e forefront.
That night Leïla shared something else with her friend, something she had quietly kept to herself since her return home. During her stay at the hospital it was discovered that she was pregnant.
Kurt Douglass and his lovely wife Yvette took the news of their nephew’s tragic death hard. When the first reports of the crash reached him in Tampa he was on a private plane and headed for Ft Lauderdale. The following morning he took time out to console Marcus’ staff. He also spent time with local and state authorities, talking to the press, identifying Marcus’ body, and making funeral arrangements, which was to be held in Tampa, Florida. A memorial service was scheduled to be held in Ft Lauderdale. The remainder of his time was spent trying to locate the two women who had meant so much to his nephew. It took a day to locate Tina and another three days to find and contact Leïla. He found both women stricken with grief and both beyond inconsolable. It was during his conversation with Leïla that he found out that she was pregnant with Marcus’ child. Immediately, he made arrangements for Leïla and her parents to fly over to Ft Lauderdale to attend the memorial service that would be held the following day. He even put them up in the best hotel in the area.
The co-founder of Spirit Of Cooperation, Inc. arrived early at his nephew’s beachfront office off of A1A. This was the morning of the memorial service that was to be held across the street on the beach and within two hours. His wife Yvette would meet him just before the ceremony was to begin. On his way in he stopped to look over towards the beach and gaze upon an arrangement of cloth-covered chairs, all empty. There were about ten rows of them. A large collection of flowers sat to the right of the chairs. The press was gathering already and there was an increase in the police presence. Curious bystanders walked by as well, some pausing to inquire about the special occasion. Turning, he resumed his walk into the building.
Island Love Page 19