Gods & Monsters: The Gods & Monsters Trilogy Book 1

by Janie Marie

  Dagonet smiled sadly and patted her back. “I do as well. For now, I will find peace in knowing I kept your children safe for you.” They split apart. “My prince.” Dagonet bowed to David before walking away.

  Jane grabbed his hand, making him smile as she addressed the others. “We’ll go get cleaned up, if that’s okay?”

  Arthur waved them off, and David chuckled at her excitement. His Jane was back.

  “David.” Jane looked up at him as they crossed the street. “Do you really think Death is fine?” The worry in her eyes crushed his annoyance about the angel he loathed.

  “Yes, sweetheart. He will be fine. Like Hades said, he’s Death.” She laughed after he said this, and looked away quickly. “What’s funny?”

  “Nothing. He just said the same thing.”

  David laughed. “Arrogant prick.”

  “David!”

  He shrugged, still smiling. “I am only stating the truth.”

  “Just be nice.” She pushed the door open to their base.

  He smiled, figuring he was off the hook when she giggled again. Before she started up the stairs, he made her stop.

  Jane frowned and stepped down. He still stood taller than her, and he smiled because of that before taking her face in his hands. “I’m glad you are okay. But promise me you will never leave again. Please don’t put me through that again.” Her eyes watered suddenly, and she nodded. He placed a kiss on her forehead and lowered his hands to hold her waist. “You have no idea how scared I’ve been for you. I already thought I’d lost you inside yourself, but coming back, finding you gone… And then realizing you’d left on your own—”

  “I’m sorry,” she whispered, wrapping her arms around his neck.

  “I know. It’s just, everything is about to change. I don’t want you getting upset and thinking you should leave or choose between any of us. I will understand the choices you’re about to make. No matter what, I will never be angry with you. I will always love you.”

  She tensed but did not move away from him, so he tried to explain his feelings for her. He hoped that if she understood how he felt about her, maybe she would be able to handle things better. “I know it must seem absurd for me to say those words to you so soon, but I do, Jane. I have waited too long for you to come into my life for me to hide my love for you. I will wait, though. Even if what I want with you never comes, I will wait.”

  She blinked to keep her tears in but one escaped.

  “Don’t cry,” he said. “I only want you to know you never have to feel pressured. I want you to know nothing will ever change how I feel. But I will understand when you do not choose me.” David pulled back and took her face again as he leaned down. All he had to do was press his lips against hers for her to know how much she was meant to be with him. He smiled when she held her breath, but instead of kissing her waiting lips like he so badly wanted to, he kissed the tear on her cheek.

  He left his lips against her sweet skin, breathing in deeply for a few moments. “I love you, baby.” He knew that he would not be able to call her that in front of her husband and needed to let her hear his adoration of her a little while longer. She was his baby, his feisty kitten when she slept—his baby doll, his sweetheart. His Jane. They just weren’t ready for each other, and he finally understood how hard it must be for her to war with her heart over all the love she had to share.

  She sobbed softly and leaned her face into his hand.

  “It’s okay.” He pulled back and dropped his hands to her waist again. “No more crying, all right? We are going to see your family. This is a good thing, and we will all be there to help you. I will not leave your side unless Death is on the other side.”

  “I know,” she said. She lifted her hand to touch the side of his face. Oh, how he loved when she showed simple affection like this. He wanted to pull her to him, but he stayed still and let her caress his cheek as her eyes seemed to take in every detail of his face. She always appeared to be in awe of him but so sad when she stared at him for too long.

  Those hazel eyes he loved finally met his while her soft hand stayed on his cheek. “David,” she said, looking conflicted for a moment but more confident when she spoke again. “It wasn’t just Death who brought me back.”

  He was unsure if she meant he had something to do with her recovery, but when she stayed quiet, as if waiting for him to understand, he smiled.

  Her eyes watered, and she laughed sadly as her fingers twitched before moving to touch the curve of his lips. He closed his mouth but still smiled. She focused on it and lightly trailed her fingers across his mouth. “This,” she said, staring at his lips for a few more seconds before she looked up to meet his eyes. “You.” She smiled, lowering her hand. After pulling his from her waist, she held it, moving her fingers over his and then pressed their palms together. “I saw you.”

  David looked down at their touching hands and then at her. She looked so sad as she held all her attention on their hands. She didn’t do anything else, just kept them pressed flat against each other, looking at them as though it broke her heart somehow.

  He moved his fingers so that they could slide between hers until their hands were clasped together.

  Jane looked up, as if she was amazed by what he’d just done. “Thank you, David.”

  He smiled and brought their hands to his lips. “Always, baby.”

  THE REFLECTION STARING back at Jane wasn’t what she was really seeing. As she had often found herself in the past, she was lost in her chaotic thoughts—overthinking every little thing that happened. Doubting herself and regretting her choices was something she had never been able to overcome. Every decision, every word she said—they were all second guessed. This behavior could drive a person mad, and Jane knew all too well how dangerous this path could be for her. It was part of why she had shut off before.

  She knew focusing on reuniting with Jason and her children was more important than analyzing things that could not be undone. So, she closed her eyes and breathed out the anxiety she felt over everything. She accepted that David and Death were with her. They both promised to stand by her, and she needed to let them if she wanted to save her family.

  Opening her eyes, she once again found herself looking at the girl in the mirror. Still a monster, she thought, sighing as she continued staring at herself. She tried recalling how her reflection appeared when she was still human because now that she was really looking, she could see how much smoother her skin looked and the faint silver shimmer she emitted.

  Gawain had said humans would not see her as clearly as they saw each other because of their heightened eyesight. Hopefully she would not seem as different to her family as she did to herself.

  She leaned forward to look at her hazel eyes. Each color shone more vibrantly. She glanced back at her face and smiled, tilting her head to see the difference from a human smile. Her canines only appeared slightly elongated, but she knew they were sharper and more prominent than they originally were.

  “Beautiful,” a deep voice spoke from behind her.

  She gasped and turned to see the man she undoubtedly loved standing there in all his magnificent glory. Smiling, she ran into Death’s arms as he held them out for her. “You’re okay,” she whispered, clutching his jacket.

  He chuckled and slid his fingers into her hair. “I told you I would be. Did you doubt me?”

  Jane pulled back, smiling even more. “No. I just can’t believe you’re here. Are you hurt?”

  “Hurt?” He snorted. “Are you trying to insult me?”

  She giggled at his playful smile. “No. I didn’t mean I don’t think you’re capable; I know you are. Thank you for saving me again.”

  Death smiled, and it melted her heart to see so much love in his look. He rubbed her lips with his thumb. They tingled, and that strange but addicting warmth sank into her skin. The way it spread throughout her body, almost searching for something inside her; she loved and hated it, but could not help but want more of the sen
sation.

  “I will always be there, Jane.” He didn’t take his eyes off her lips. “Just don’t run off again.”

  “I won’t.” Her words sounded more breathless than she intended to. “I’m sorry for everything.”

  He shook his head and lifted his gaze to meet hers. “There’s nothing to be sorry for. You were very brave. I’m proud of you.”

  Jane realized that he didn’t know about Lucifer, about anything that happened since he left her. “You don’t know what I did, though.”

  “Jane, have I ever been angry with you?”

  “No.”

  “I know that you finally fell apart—that’s nothing to be ashamed of. Everyone falls, but not everyone gets back up. The fact that you did means everything. Don’t worry about anything else.”

  “Do you know what I did, though?”

  He cupped her cheek and shook his head no.

  She tore her gaze from him and looked to the side. “I didn’t want to feel any more pain, so I stopped it all. I don’t even know how I did it. It was like I was still there but not. I knew what was going on, but I couldn’t do anything, couldn’t feel any of it. I didn’t want to…. I was so tired, Death.”

  She looked back up to see him nod. He was being patient with her like he had always been. “David and the knights left me behind because of how I made myself.” He didn’t look happy about her being left but stayed quiet. “Death, I met Lucifer.” His green eyes darkened, but Jane swallowed and continued. “He promised to make it go away for me—to take me somewhere where it would stop. I let him do something to me. It’s my fault all this happened because I didn’t want to hurt any of you. I was afraid, and you weren’t here…. And I didn’t want to hurt anyone. It hurt so much. And David—I was hurting him. I’m so sorry.”

  Death said nothing. He only stared down at her, the green color of his eyes shifted every few seconds from a deep emerald color to burning, electric-green fire.

  She grew more worried. “De—”

  He cut his name off with his lips. He kissed her, desperately, as though she could vanish from his arms at any moment. He didn’t deepen it, just pressed kiss after kiss to her lips. He stopped but kept his lips hovering over hers, sending intense sparks across them at every tiny brush.

  So badly she felt the urge to pull his lips back to hers. Something deep inside her craved, no, needed his kiss.

  “Don’t ever do that again,” he whispered. “You have no idea what it would have meant for you to go with him.”

  The true fear in his voice had her trembling with sadness. “I won’t. I promise. I’m sorry.”

  He kissed her quickly, then a throat cleared from the doorway.

  Jane jumped and looked over to see David standing there. He smiled even though his eyes held a mixture of sorrow and anger. Her gaze fell to the floor in hopes that when she looked up, time might reverse so that David would have never witnessed her kisses with Death.

  Death pulled Jane against his side. “Hello, David. I’m glad to see she made it back to you.”

  Jane looked up and was surprised to see David smile.

  “Death,” he said with a slight nod. “Thank you for coming to her aid and sending her back. She explained all that happened—we are preparing to leave after we gather her family. I actually hoped you might return in time, and join me to make sure all goes well when she sees them again.”

  Jane looked at them in shock. They were still being pleasant with each other! Their calm exchange eased some of her guilt, and she looked up at Death, hopeful that he would agree.

  “Pulling out the big guns, I see.” Death’s eyes stayed focused on her pouting lip, and he smiled, squeezing her closer. “Fine. I will come chaperone your little visit.”

  Jane beamed up at him and smiled brightly to David.

  “One of us should always be with her,” Death said, looking back to David. “Don’t hesitate to drag her out of there if she gets upset. Jason is not going to take it well when he sees us with her. If he gets angry, she’s going to be furious. We cannot let her get to a destructive point because of him.”

  Death lowered his gaze to hers. “Don’t give me that look, baby girl. You know how volatile your emotions make you. And you know how bad Jason can make you feel.”

  “Death,” she said, looking at David briefly.

  The angel shrugged. “David needs to know before he meets him anyway. Just because you didn’t see me doesn’t mean I was not present for some of your bad moments together. You may think you can hide shit, but everyone can see how wrong things are between you and your husband. He’s a prick.”

  David cleared his throat, but Jane didn’t look up. She could only stare down at the floor. “Perhaps now is not the time—”

  Death slid his gaze over to David. “I would not say this if it were not necessary,” he told him, then looked back to her. “Jane, you are a powerful immortal. You are a threat to even the deadliest of creatures in many realms. Your power—the darkness in you—and the fact you’re newly made on top of your temper makes you a ticking time bomb. I won’t hesitate in knocking your sexy ass out if I think you are a danger to anyone. David should be prepared to do the same. I will not let you make a mistake that will drive you insane.”

  She didn’t even react to how he worded things. All she focused on was him saying how dangerous she truly was, and just how much he seemed to know about her and Jason’s marriage. “Do whatever you think is best,” she told them.

  “I always try to.” Death pushed some of her hair behind her ear. “Angry with me, Sweet Jane?” His smile, and the fact he now slid the back of his fingers down her jaw, soothed the harsh blow his honest words had delivered.

  “You know I can never be mad at you,” she said, smiling at the little tingles before he pulled his hand away. “It’s probably some spell you cast over me.”

  He didn’t reply. Instead, he tossed her a mischievous wink and looked away when David spoke.

  “Don’t worry, sweetheart,” David said. “We will take care of you. I promise everything will work out. We are on a schedule, though. Gawain, Arthur, and Dagonet are coming with us while the others break down camp. So, let’s go get your family.”

  She was getting her family back! She smiled at both of them, completely forgetting about Death’s speech. She simply felt so much warmth inside her. They were doing so much for her, and she felt complete standing there between them as they both smiled down at her.

  Death chuckled when she kept looking between them, and finally grabbed her hand to pull her out of the room.

  Since she was behind Death, and he followed David, she got the chance to appreciate how big and powerful they both were. The best part was they were working together for her.

  David met Death’s gaze. You didn’t need to hear them speak to know they were forming an alliance—teaming up against whatever threatened her, including Jason.

  They glanced down at her and then looked back at each other. They both had that possessive gleam in their eye, but they nodded to each other.

  The delightful tingles traveling up and down the side of her arm almost distracted her from the anxiety she felt while she and Death waited for David to return.

  Her vampire had gone to speak with Arthur and Dagonet, saying he wanted to make sure everything was set before bringing her over to see Jason.

  Jane glanced to the spot beside her on the couch. Death’s massive size looked ridiculous sitting there in a living room with his head tilted back against the couch while he stared up at the ceiling.

  He had one arm draped over her shoulder as his fingers glided over the upper part of her arm. He’d even gone as far as tossing his muscular legs, ankles crossed, on the glass coffee table. She eyed the glass, wondering how it managed to not give under his weight. And to think, if one of the knights saw him, they’d see the Grim Reaper lounging on a couch with her!

  She shook her head and looked back to the doorway.

  “Staring at the doorw
ay won’t make him come back any sooner. You need to relax, babe.” He didn’t even look away from the ceiling, but she realized he was very aware of just how tense she was. “You’re starting to stress me out.”

  “And what are you accomplishing, staring at the ceiling?”

  His fingers slowed, but then slid up her arm, over her shoulder, and then barely extended to touch her jaw. She shivered, and his lip twitched with a hint of a smile. “Trying to distract myself from the memory of my lips on yours.”

  She looked into his eyes, which had lowered slightly to look at her. “We shouldn’t do that, Death.”

  “Hm.” He let his finger graze her jaw once more before his eyes moved to her mouth. “Do you know how many times I have imagined kissing you since your birthday kiss?”

  “No.”

  He responded instantly. “Every night when I first see the moon in the night’s sky, and every morning before the sun hides it.”

  She had to stare at him in silence for a minute. “Why, then?”

  He looked back at the ceiling. “I think it has something to do with how I visited you every night before I took your memory of us. When I saw the moon, I knew you were waiting for me. And when it disappeared behind the blue sky, I knew I had to leave.”

  “Hello and goodbye kisses.”

  “Good night and good morning.” He corrected, smiling a little now while he kept his gaze on the ceiling. “You are my moon—all that I see in the dark sky.”

  She smiled, too, and leaned back to join him in staring upwards. “That’s kinda romantic, Death.” She chuckled and leaned against him more. “I did not expect that.”

  “I’m not romantic,” he said, chuckling. “I imagined more than just kissing when I saw the moon. Loving you as you’re completely naked under the moonlight is definitely one of my favorite recurring fantasies.”

  “Pervert.” She smiled wider, enjoying the sound of his laugh.

  “You love it.”

  “I do, actually. And I love the moon part.”

  “I know you love it.” He chuckled. “Naughty girl. Next full moon: you, me—butt naked.”