Frozen Stiff

by L. J. Vickery

  “What are the time constraints?” Enlil looked puzzled. Marduk knew what he thought. As long as they got things sorted, what did it matter if it took a few days or a few weeks to contact Nergal? The gods and their women remained safe in the compound for now. Marduk spelled out the problem.

  “Nergal’s got his big meeting of all the Underworld gods coming up in a couple of days. If Ereshkigal has changed sides, he needs to know before she has a chance to recruit any power.” He looked at Enlil seriously. “The last thing we need is a shake-up of leadership down below. Who knows what will happen to us if a new god comes to power. We could find our asses back in the Underworld and in deep shit before we have a chance to blink.”

  Enlil clearly hadn’t thought that far ahead, but now that Marduk had enlightened him, he looked worried…as well he should. Enlil and a bunch of the other gods had yet to find their Chosen, and sending them all back to the Underworld for eternity would ensure they never did. They’d all be fucked…and not in a good way.

  “Do you really think Ereshkigal has gone bad?” Enlil shook his head in obvious bewilderment. “She seemed so onboard at Dagon and Holly’s joining ceremony.”

  The door opened quietly behind him and Tess stormed in. “I heard you two,” she hissed. “And I don’t believe it for a second.”

  Marduk sighed. Tess wouldn’t let anyone railroad her new goddess-friend. “It’s obvious Eresh is being set up. Nergal needs to find out who’s doing it.” She had that perky, determined look on her face Marduk had come to both dread and love at the same time. “And if you won’t call him right now, I will.” She crossed her arms over her chest and tapped her foot.

  “I was just about to do that, my love.” Looking at his wife’s burgeoning stomach, he could deny her nothing. “You can stick around if you like.”

  “Good.” Tess nodded her head. “Because I’m Ereshkigal’s advocate if you guys get too charged up with testosterone and convict her before hearing all of the evidence.”

  Enlil grinned like a fool and Marduk shrugged because, yeah, Tess had a point. It could happen. The thunder god shut the room’s other occupants out and silently implored Nergal to join them.

  It didn’t take long.

  “This had better be important,” Nergal boomed, flashing into the room with a spectacular show of fire and smoke. Tess coughed.

  “Sorry, Lady Tess,” he apologized, contritely. “I didn’t realize you were here.”

  She gave a hesitant smile. “Not a problem. You know I love a good show.”

  Nergal bowed and grinned before turning his attention to Marduk at the desk. “So, to what do I owe the pleasure of being called?” The smirk left the king’s face when he noticed the obvious tension emanating from Marduk and from Enlil hovering nearby.

  “Yesterday we had another altercation with the human, Matthew, who had been employed by Dagon, and subsequently Erra—”

  “You should be having no more trouble from him,” Nergal interrupted. “We clipped his wings now that both those gods are onboard with my…change of heart.” He had the good graces to look a little sheepish.

  “You’re correct about Dagon and Erra,” Marduk agreed. “Both of them have proven loyal, but we’ve found Matthew is being supported by a new power.”

  The Underworld god raised his eyebrows. “Oh really? Who would dare to go up against me?”

  Marduk knew this was the tricky part, as did Tess, who moved quickly around the king to bring herself into close proximity. She probably figured it would be harder for Nergal’s fire and brimstone to disintegrate her mate if his pregnant wife stood next to him.

  “Several of us were in a stand-off with Matthew. He held a gun to Enten’s Chosen, and knew he would be unable to escape.”

  “The Chosen part is news to me.” Nergal looked shocked, which was unusual for the head deity. “Our cold friend has found a woman?” The king coughed and shook it off. “Uh, fine then. Kudos to him.” He nodded. “Continue please.”

  Marduk rubbed the back of his neck. “When Matthew started to mist away with Glory in his arms, Enten lunged to save her at the last minute, getting shot in the throat for his troubles.”

  Nergal scowled. “You’re beating around the bush, Marduk. Tell me what you have to say. I know Enten will recover. But how could the human disappear? Be done with it.”

  The god of thunder sighed. “Before Matthew misted out, he called a name.” Marduk still paused, hesitant to let the words out of his mouth. “The immortal he called was Ereshkigal.”

  “Bullshit,” Nergal roared, growing suddenly larger. “Is this some kind of a play to ruin the tentative peace my queen and I have achieved?” He upended several chairs in the room, not doing well at containing his anger. “Explain yourself.”

  Tess intervened before the transformer-like god destroyed the whole room. “Please, your grace.” She put out a hand imploringly. “We don’t for a second believe your wife has anything to do with Matthew. Remember when someone pretended to be you?” Tess paused to let that sink into Nergal’s brain for a moment, wanting him to recall the impostor who had been using his voice for years―most recently to manipulate the god of war. Tess continued as the king looked to be cooling down. “That same someone is now putting on a show as your wife.”

  Nergal’s color slowly returned to normal, from the lava-red it had become, back to its lighter hue. Marduk let out a pent a breath as the king cleared his throat. “You’re sure you weren’t mistaken with the name he said?”

  Marduk opened his mouth to answer but became alerted by a small sound in the doorway, and turned swiftly instead. The portal, which had been left open, was now full of faces: gods, witches, humans, the works. As a matter of fact, every resident of the compound except Kate―Glory’s mother who rested upstairs―crowded around to see what was happening. All had obviously been alerted to Marduk’s office by the commotion Nergal made. One face pushed its way to the front, and Marduk saw the king look their newcomer over from top to bottom.

  “I…I’m Glory.” She limped forward, favoring her right leg and her left side, but bravely held out her hand to shake his as she introduced herself.

  Nergal bowed formally, and took the proffered hand. “Am I to assume you are Enten’s Chosen?”

  Glory bit her lip in confusion. “I keep hearing that term but I’m not sure what it means.” She forged ahead, buoyed by the soft tone the king used to address her, and keen to drop the subject of Enten. “But…I have to concur with Marduk. I’m sorry to say the name Ereshkigal was used in my presence―while I was captive―a number of times.” She studied her feet as Nergal’s dark green eyes flashed.

  “Give me context, young woman,” he demanded.

  Glory swallowed. “I was told I would be given to her. That she would probably make me a sex slave, and I would be used as bait to draw the gods to wherever she lives.”

  There was silence for a few moments before Nergal spoke again. “Well…you’d make a lovely sex slave.” His voice caressed her skin and she felt a warm shiver move over her body. Weird. It didn’t sound so bad the way he put it.

  She will be no such thing. The words burst into Glory’s head, and everyone else’s if she was not mistaken. It was frigid with anger. Enten hadn’t found his voice yet, but he staked his claim inside brains.

  Nergal actually rolled his eyes. “No disrespect intended, Enten,” he assured. “She’s just extremely…well…extremely.”

  Glory saw Enten take a deep breath. He tilted his head at the king, reluctantly acquiescing to his liege, but didn’t issue an apology. Damn. If the Underworld royal didn’t kill them both, they’d be lucky. Enten should stop being a jerk, even though Glory knew his―more extreme than normal―cold attitude sprung from her.

  She’d woken up in the hospital this morning terribly embarrassed by her bold behavior with Enten, and had barely been able to look at him since. She desperately needed to be alone to sort through her feelings for the god and whether she felt ready to enter in
to any kind of a sexual relationship. But dammit, there seemed to be no solitary spot in the entire, enormous compound. And until she became sure of herself where Enten was concerned, she could not allow him any additional encouragement.

  The king actually chuckled, breaking her reveries. Instead of the uber-god being angered by her report on his wife, she’d somehow managed to amuse him. Glory looked up at him from under lowered lashes, and quickly ascertained that a less uptight Nergal would be a less dangerous Nergal. She silently willed Enten to calm the hell down.

  Marduk wisely stepped in and explained the rest of the previous day’s activities and enumerated the injuries sustained while Nergal listened carefully. When Marduk finished, the king turned to Glory.

  “I see now this is all ridiculous,” he mused, contemplating her up and down once again. “As stunning as you are, my dear, my wife is a flaming feminist and would never consider a woman sex slave.” Had he emphasized the word slave and mumbled “unfortunately” under his breath? Glory had to be mistaken. The king continued.

  “Not only that, but she wouldn’t condone the use of weapons. She loves this ridiculous group of gods, and has been rubbing my nose in it for centuries. I find it impossible to believe she has suddenly turned against them.”

  “Exactly my thoughts.” Tess steered triumphant eyes to her husband and Enlil. Glory found it odd that everyone was so sure that this Ereshkigal remained innocent.

  “But we need to be alert and dig deep. Not only has someone been impersonating me, but now they attempt to blacken my wife’s name…and to what purpose?” He paused only a moment before Glory heard him call to his consort.

  Ereshkigal. A moment later he added, Lavarette.

  The woman Glory figured had to be the queen―and the strangest-looking ethereal creature Glory had ever seen―turned up simultaneously. Glory backed up, still not convinced about Ereshkigal, but the king got right to the point.

  “You’ve been accused, my love, of consorting with the human from Plymouth known as Matthew to plot the downfall of these gods and their Chosen for unknown and nefarious reasons. How do you plead?”

  Ereshkigal burst out laughing. “Just when am I supposed to have found the time to be nefarious with all the details I’m seeing to for your little soirée?” She arched one eyebrow at her husband. “Don’t you just love the word nefarious?” She wiggled her upper torso suggestively.

  He sighed. “This is no laughing matter, my sweet. Someone has been impersonating you in the same way they had previously been impersonating me. They have ordered that pain-in-the-ass mortal to go around shooting and hurting gods and their Chosen.”

  His arm went out to indicate Enten and Glory, who stood next to each other, but several feet apart. Ereshkigal’s face went blank.

  “Enten has a Chosen?” she asked, acting astounded. Glory felt dreadfully confused.

  Ereshkigal must have seen her consternation, because she instantly corrected herself. “Oh. Of course he does. Of course.” She moved forward and patted Glory’s arm. “You couldn’t have found yourself a more…solid…partner anywhere.” The queen smiled, but inside spoke tongue in cheek in that head-talk thing. Good wedding present―thermal underwear.

  Glory rolled her eyes. It wasn’t the right time to tell the queen she could hear god-speak.

  “So tell me about these injuries,” the queen continued out loud. “What havoc is being wrought?” She moved to take a closer look at Enten and saw the obvious wound to the throat.

  Without further conversation, Glory heard Nergal download a full report from his brain to the queen’s, and to his―he’d just revealed the identity of the ghostlike figure in the room―head of security, Lavarette.

  “Well, I’m appalled,” the queen told everyone after she’d heard the extent of the treachery. Her gaze traveled around the room. “Appalled that someone has done this, and I’m under suspicion. I can assure you I certainly haven’t been plotting…”

  “Who accuses you of plotting?”

  Glory could only stand and stare. Two new gods…more strangers to her…just popped into the room.

  “No one, Ish-Din,” Nergal groused. “Calm down.” He added an aside to Glory. “This is my wife’s sister, Ishtar-Dinitu, and her…whatever.” He waved a hand at the big guy. “Erra is my ex-god of war, and a current employee of mine.” He quickly got back to business. “Someone is playing us all for fools, and we need to find out who it is and quickly. The great impersonator, who thought to mimic me, is now emulating Eresh, and in the process almost succeeded in taking this young woman,” he pointed at Glory, “Enten’s Chosen…”

  “What?” Both Erra and Ish-Din chimed in simultaneously.

  “…his Chosen.” Nergal gave them a quelling glare that silenced the pair.

  Glory wanted to scream in frustration. What the hell were they talking about? She opened her mouth to speak, but Nergal cut her off, clearly not standing for another interruption. “Bring his Chosen back to their lair, wherever that may be.” He gave the two latest-to-the-party gods a look that told them to cut Enten some slack and behave, which Glory figured the pair obeyed using great restraint.

  “Now,” the king inquired. “Who has any ideas as to how we might proceed?”

  Lenore stepped forward, and Glory wasn’t surprised. It seemed the woman was always poised and ready.

  “I say we get them with their guard down,” she began. “Whoever is behind this needs to think we’ve bought into their scheme, and we believe the queen…sorry your majesty…is the culprit.” She looked at Nergal. “I happen to know you have a very lovely and very empty cage down in your throne room. I suggest you lock your wife up in it, and tell everyone she’s under suspicion. In the meantime,” she went on, ignoring the look of horror that had come to Ereshkigal’s face. “We should all disburse from our little safety-crib here, and go back out into the world like we’re certain the danger to us has completely passed.” She got some questioning looks. Glory gave one of her own.

  “You know,” Lenore prompted. “Go places to look normal again. There’s my family’s house on the beach in Plymouth, The Abelard’s place in Maine and Dani-Lee’s vacant apartment.” She looked at Glory. “I’m thinking there’s also an empty bed in Northampton.”

  She glanced around, now on a roll. “Those of us who are corporeal should inhabit those places, while the invisible gods take turns moving from spot to spot keeping an eye out. Even if they can be detected by the evil god or goddess in charge, human bad guys won’t see them. Whoever the head honcho is, they’ll be lulled into complacency, and might just make a mistake.”

  Dagon spoke up, concurring, “I couldn’t agree more. Further, I’m thinking whatever their next move is, it’s probably set to happen during Nergal’s big get-together down below. We lesser gods are probably just a distraction. I’m thinking the main event could be Nergal and Ereshkigal. I’ll bet my eyeteeth, and they can be pretty impressive, that once we’re all out of the way, someone is going to target both of you, big time.”

  Glory noticed that the security being, Lavarette, listened closely. “I believe Master…uh, Dagon and Lenore are correct.” Perhaps she had her suspicions where to look for the deceiver. “I will step up my efforts to make sure you are both protected.” She inclined her head to the king and queen. “But at the same time, do I have your permission to delve into some inclinations I have?”

  Nergal looked curious and nodded in deference to Lavarette’s proven intelligence. “Do everything you can to find who is behind this.”

  His head of security saluted, and disappeared.

  “In the meantime, I will attempt to locate Matthew,” Erra assured the king.

  “I’m afraid he won’t be in Plymouth,” Enlil speculated. “The cops climbed all over the guys they caught who worked for Matthew, and after extracting information from them, I’m sure you’ll find the place surrounded by yellow tape and quiet as a tomb.”

  Erra grunted. “That’s fine. I have an energy link
to the dick-wad that I put in place when he first started working for me. I shouldn’t have any trouble locating him.”

  “Erra, please.” Tess stepped in. “Remember, you still have to act the badass, like whatever he’s doing is okay with you. If you put on a good show, maybe he’ll tell you who’s pulling his strings.”

  Glory’s head spun with all the gods, and super-secret double-agent stuff going on, but she figured she’d eventually catch up.

  “I’ll watch myself,” Erra said to the goddess. “He’s still a weak, puke-mewling human. I’ll have no trouble controlling him.”

  “But you will have trouble controlling whoever is behind him. Promise to be careful.” Tess pursed her lips with worry.

  “Don’t worry, Lady Tess. I’ll be with him.” Ish-Din reached out and curled her fingers through Erra’s.

  An established relationship? Or another one unfolding? Glory wondered.

  The pretty, radiant goddess continued. “And I tell you what. We’ll all sneak in and kick some ass in the Underworld once Nergal’s party gets started. Sound good?” The goddess looked around at all the faces.

  “Agreed,” the whole group, minus Glory―who remained bewildered―chimed in. Looking around, it seemed to Glory that everyone―Huxley, Dani-Lee and the two witches…witches…she’d been introduced to―all itched for some action.

  As for Nergal? He couldn’t hide that he was pleased, and Glory figured out why. When trouble hit, this Blue Hills group was clearly a good bunch to have at your back. It put a whole new spin on the term “wingmen.”

  Glory saw the king turn to his wife, grinning.

  “Ereshkigal, my love,” he said, somewhat lasciviously. “It’s time to put you in my cage.”

  Chapter Nineteen

  Enten, sitting out on the sunny, stone terrace at the back of the T-Taj, was nearly finished making the list. He’d wielded the pen with underwhelming enthusiasm. Marduk had told him to make sure his master plan―as to where all of the residents would go to confuse the Underworld evil―included provisions that would make everyone happy. Even if he currently remained miserable. Glory hadn’t spoken to him since her inebriated hand-job in the hospital. He knew he should have stopped things. Guilt ate away at him. It never should have happened. He was cold, she was warm, and never the twain should meet. He’d been taught that lesson over and over long ago. It didn’t matter, Chosen or not. When would he learn?