Delta Force Daddy

by Carol Ericson

  “When the hell were you going to tell me about our daughter?”

  Chapter Eleven

  Paige jerked the steering wheel, and the car swerved across an empty lane. She righted the car and hunched her shoulders.

  “Y-you remembered? Everything?”

  “Everything that matters.” Asher’s eyes narrowed, his jaw settling into a hard line.

  “I thought piling that on when you still have unnamed forces after you...and your mind would be too much for you to handle.”

  “Really? Didn’t you come out to Hidden Hills to see me so that you could help me get my memory back? Make me whole?”

  “I did, but that was before I knew the full extent of what they were doing to you. I still don’t know the entire story—and neither do you. I had to haul you out of that coffee place earlier because you just passed out. Do you remember that?”

  “I remember leaving a message for Cam, and then...nothing.”

  “Exactly. Do you understand why I didn’t think it was a great idea to tell you about Ivy?”

  “Let’s get real, Paige.” He gripped his knees. “You didn’t think it was a great idea to tell me about Ivy because you didn’t want to reveal the circumstances of her birth and everything that followed.”

  Her nose stung, and she tried to swallow the lump in her throat. “Okay, maybe I thought that was too much for you to bear. You didn’t remember me, didn’t remember what I went through. I didn’t want you to worry about putting your faith in a woman, a stranger really, who’d had...issues.”

  “Who was an alcoholic who relapsed after the birth of our child. An alcoholic who put that child in danger. An alcoholic I couldn’t trust with my daughter.”

  The road swam before her, and she blinked her eyes, dislodging a tear from her lashes. “I could’ve told you the whole story about my recovery and my path to sobriety, but it would’ve just been words to you, hollow words if you couldn’t remember the ups and downs and the feelings.”

  Closing his eyes, Asher ran a thumb between his eyebrows. “I remember. God, I remember.”

  She skimmed her clammy palms over the steering wheel. “So, you conked out, and when you woke up, your memory had returned? That’s not the effect they’d counted on, I’m sure.”

  He sliced a hand in the air to cut her off. “How is Ivy? Who’s taking care of her? Your mom?”

  “Mom has her and Ivy’s doing great. She misses her daddy. I kept telling her you were coming home soon—and then you went on that assignment with Major Denver.”

  “Do you have pictures on your phone? I want to see her. I want to talk to her.”

  “Of course.” She tipped her chin toward her phone on the console. “My phone’s there.”

  He grabbed it and then folded his hands around it. “We still shouldn’t turn this on.”

  Paige licked her lips. She didn’t want to tell him she’d used her phone to call Elena and Terrence. She’d fallen into old habits so easily...keeping things from him.

  “I’m truly sorry, Asher. I... Maybe I wanted you to keep me on that pedestal for a few more days. It was wrong. I should’ve told you everything.”

  The words came to her lips easily and willingly. She’d spent years apologizing to Asher.

  He rubbed his eyes. “I can’t believe I didn’t remember Ivy. She’s everything to me.”

  “I know that.” Paige dropped her lashes. “I promise I’ll give you a complete update on Ivy, but what do you think happened in the coffeehouse? Had you experienced that before at Hidden Hills?”

  “The only time anything like that occurred at Hidden Hills was the time I ran into you in the forest, when Granger and Lewis shot me with the dart. Complete blackout.”

  “Well, that didn’t happen back in Montpelier. I keep thinking it must’ve been a timed-release drug. I called my friend Elena Morelli, a psychiatrist, and she told me there are such things.”

  “I can believe anything of those docs at Hidden Hills. If they can implant false memories in my brain, they can inject something into my system that will affect me later.”

  “But why would they do something like that?”

  “Who knows?” He rubbed the back of his head where his dark hair was growing in over the wound. “If I had escaped and been on my own and collapsed like that in public, someone would’ve called 911 and they’d have me in their clutches again.”

  “I did the right thing not bringing you to an emergency room? I wasn’t sure.”

  “You did the right thing.” He cleared his throat. “Thanks.”

  She nodded her head, the pleasure in any compliment from him dulled by the knowledge that he resented her for keeping Ivy from him. Had she been wrong to want to bask in his pleasure at having a kickass fiancée who’d sprung him from captivity?

  Even after she’d recovered from her addiction, she always looked for the acknowledgment of her weakness in Asher’s eyes. She’d been sensitive to every nuance in his voice, every glance at her when she had Ivy in her arms.

  Yeah, she’d been wrong. That hadn’t been her call to make. She squared her shoulders. “I’m sorry. I should’ve told you everything about us and our daughter. I should’ve put you under hypnosis and brought you back—all the way back to the day we met at that party—when I was drunk and fell into the pool, fully clothed and clutching a margarita for dear life.”

  His lips twisted. “I still felt an overpowering urge to rescue you, drunk or not.”

  “And you did. You rescued me in every way imaginable.” She covered one of his hands with hers. “I’m so glad you got your memory back.”

  “I am, too, but when am I going to pass out again and where? Maybe next time the drug will erase any memories I gained back and put me at square one.” He pounded his knee with his fist. “I can’t afford to be back at square one, Paige.”

  “I know that, but I meant what I said about the doctor.”

  “Doctor?”

  Of course he couldn’t remember what she’d said about their destination and the money and the doctor and Cam. He’d been remembering their whole tumultuous relationship together and what a bad mom she’d been.

  “I talked to Cam—on the temp phone.” She slipped her hand from Asher’s and flicked on the windshield wipers. “We’re heading to his girlfriend’s place on Chesapeake Bay. They’ll have money for us there and send a doctor over.”

  “Wait, wait.” He held up his hands. “Maybe I don’t have all my memories back. Cam Sutton has a girlfriend? A girlfriend with a place on Chesapeake Bay?”

  “He told me it was a long story, so we didn’t get into it. He also told me he’s on his way out of the country, so maybe another deployment.”

  “I wonder where he’s being assigned with Denver and me out.”

  “He didn’t say, but the house will be empty. He gave me instructions. I also have Terrence working on getting us some cash.”

  “Terrence needs to be careful. He’s retired. He doesn’t need to be getting into any trouble with the army.”

  “He knows what he’s doing. He has contacts in Atlantic City who might be able to help us out, too.”

  “You did good.” Asher ran his fingers along her arm. “You saved me again.”

  “I think I owe you a lot of saves to pay you back for all the times you saved me.”

  He tapped the heel of his hand against his head. “It’s a strange feeling knowing someone is controlling you remotely.”

  “Could your blackout have been a result of your injuries? You remembered everything when you woke up. Could it have been your body’s way of healing you?”

  “That sounds a lot better than some timed-release drug ready to bring me to my knees every twenty-four hours.” He cocked an eyebrow at her. “How the hell did you get me out of that coffee place?”

  “You were still on your feet. I h
alf dragged, half carried you out.” She winked. “Don’t forget. I’ve had a lot of practice hauling drunks out of bars.”

  “You always were the best sponsor in AA.”

  “Full disclosure.” She held up two fingers. “Another customer helped me through the parking lot and into the car.”

  “Another customer? Someone you could trust?”

  “He wasn’t going to turn around and call the police or EMTs, if that’s what you mean. He thought you were a junkie.” She bit her bottom lip.

  “He’s not so far from the truth.” Asher thumped his fist against his chest. “I don’t know what’s coursing through my veins.”

  “Maybe Martha’s doctor friend can figure it out.”

  “Martha?”

  “Cam’s girlfriend.”

  “Cam’s girlfriend.” He shook his head. “God help her.”

  * * *

  NOW THAT HIS memories had returned, Asher couldn’t turn them off. Everything he and Paige had been through with her addiction to alcohol rushed back in every painful detail. He’d made it clear to her that she had to choose between him or the booze—she’d chosen the booze but then found out she was pregnant.

  That had scared her. She’d stayed sober during her pregnancy but had fallen off the wagon after Ivy was born. He’d reached the end of the line with her, threatening to take the baby away from her unless she got help.

  She loved Ivy as much as he did, and she got to work, with a vengeance—AA, therapy, cutting off drinking buddies. The process spurred her on to become a marriage, family and child counselor, and she attacked that course as vigorously as she had dealt with her addiction.

  He understood why she’d want to keep all that from him a little while longer, but when he remembered he had a daughter and realized why she hadn’t told him about Ivy, he’d gotten that sinking feeling in his gut—the same one he’d felt when Paige had tried to get sober the first time...and failed. She’d lied to him, hid things from him, made excuses. It had almost torn them apart—almost.

  From the driver’s seat, he glanced at her, head tipped to one side, mouth slightly ajar. They’d bonded over their dysfunctional family lives.

  His father, a convicted bank robber serving time in federal prison, and hers, a disgraced cop who’d taken his own life, but her trauma had gone a step further.

  As a teenager, Paige had found her father in the family’s garage, his brains blown out. How did a kid recover from that? Paige had numbed it with alcohol.

  Asher had dealt with his own...disappointment by becoming overly regimented in all aspects of his life. Fate had led him to Paige, just when she needed him and he needed her. Nothing could disrupt your life quite like an alcoholic.

  Taking care of Paige had satisfied that driving need in his life to impose order on all things. It also taught him compassion and forgiveness—emotions that had been absent in his psychological makeup until that point. He needed to find those again.

  Paige jerked awake, her eyes wide-open immediately. “Where are we?”

  “We’re already through Jersey. We have less than an hour to get there. Cam’s girlfriend must be rolling in dough with an address like that.”

  “Cam said it’s her mother’s house.”

  “Where’s the mom?”

  “He didn’t say, just that the house would be all ours.”

  “It’ll be a good base for our operation, and now that the boys are back on my side, maybe I can get some help from them. I need to talk to Cam again and find out more about those emails he mentioned. I don’t think my imprisonment had anything to do with me, and everything to do with Denver. I was just a tool for them.”

  Paige yawned. “Now that you have your memories back, do you remember anything more about the mission?”

  “I remember the name of Denver’s contact—Shabib. He had information for the major that he had to communicate in person. It was something Denver was expecting, something he’d been investigating—something big.”

  “Apparently, it was so big, he had to be neutralized.”

  “But they didn’t get him, did they?” Asher watched the rain lash the windshield and the wipers flick the drops off as fast as they fell. “Denver’s out there somewhere, and he’s going to be counting on us—his team members—to help him.”

  “Where are you going to start?”

  “At the beginning. I’m going to track down Shabib, one way or another.”

  “Turnoff in less than two miles.” Paige hunched forward and peered through the rain. “This is an out-of-the-way place.”

  “The more remote, the better.”

  “The farther from Hidden Hills, the better.”

  “They’re still probably trying to figure out what happened in that cabin.”

  Paige hugged herself and rubbed her arms. “I hate thinking about it.”

  “It all worked in our favor—fate.”

  “That was Tabitha’s fate? To die in a fire in that cabin?”

  “She etched it out herself.” He aimed the car down a long driveway. “And this house on the bay is ours right now.”

  Asher slid out of the car and used the code on the garage door to open it. He drove the car into the garage and closed the door so it still looked like a deserted house.

  Paige followed Cam’s directions on the location of the key, and ten minutes later, they entered a lavishly decorated house, clean and well stocked with food.

  Asher whistled as he hung on the fridge door and surveyed the contents. “We could probably hole up here for six months.”

  “Let’s hope we don’t have to.” She kicked a duffel bag she dragged from beneath a chair. “Cash. I already called Terrence to let him know we had another source.”

  Asher shook his head. “I can’t believe Cam orchestrated all this. He’s not exactly a planner.”

  “I know, but his new girlfriend must be. He was on his way out of the country. Martha must’ve made these arrangements.”

  “We’ll have to thank Martha if we ever meet her.”

  Paige looked up from pawing through the money in the bag. “Is that because you don’t think they’ll last...or you don’t think we’ll last?”

  “Oh, I plan to be alive to meet any and all of Cam’s girlfriends, and you’re coming along for this ride. Speaking of staying alive—” he pointed at the duffel “—is the gun in there?”

  She buried both hands in the bag and withdrew a .38, holding it by its barrel. “Just like Cam promised.”

  “I’m starting to revise my opinion of that hothead.” Asher crossed the great room and took the gun from Paige. “Bullets?”

  “I felt a box at the bottom of the bag.”

  “Money, weapon, food and your computer. I’m ready to get to work.”

  “I’m ready to go to sleep.” Paige ran her hands through her hair. “And maybe take a shower.”

  “I’m ready to see pictures of Ivy.” He raised his eyebrows. “You didn’t think I forgot, did you?”

  “Of course not.” She retrieved her laptop and brought it to the kitchen counter. “I have a bunch from Thanksgiving. I sent some of those to you. Those bastards at Hidden Hills must’ve seen them on your phone and still didn’t bother to tell you about your daughter.” Two red spots flared on Paige’s cheeks. “I didn’t, either.”

  “Two different motivations.”

  “Both selfish.”

  “No argument from me.” Asher felt the anger tighten in his chest again and filled his lungs with air. At least he understood Paige’s motivation, and it wasn’t like she planned to keep Ivy’s existence a secret from him forever. She’d just wanted a little breathing room away from his judgment and censure.

  He joined her at the counter as she powered on the computer. “I never had my phone, anyway.”

  “They never gave you your phone?” H
er fingers clicked across the keyboard. “Of course they didn’t.”

  “My phone was never recovered—at least that’s what they told me.”

  “Do you believe them?” She double-clicked a folder on her desktop and his daughter came back to him in living color.

  He put his face close to the monitor and traced a finger around Ivy’s face. “How could I have ever forgotten this cute little button?”

  “You didn’t have a choice.” She clicked open another folder. “Here are the ones from Thanksgiving, which are on a phone somewhere in Afghanistan.”

  “Yeah, I wonder where it really is.”

  They spent the next fifteen minutes looking at pictures while Paige updated him on Ivy’s latest antics. But he remembered these photos now, remembered that Ivy had started singing into a hairbrush, had her first ballet recital, was begging for a puppy.

  Paige was a good mom and even across the miles had kept him informed about Ivy’s activities.

  Guilt tweaked the edges of his mind. She kept him apprised of every detail because she still felt as if she had to prove herself to him. Prove that she was a good mother.

  No wonder she’d wanted a brief respite from his accusing eyes.

  He turned to her suddenly and cupped her face with one hand. “You’re doing a great job with Ivy. She looks happy and healthy. And all this... You did this. You got us here to safety.”

  Paige’s lips curved into a smile. “Technically, Cam and his girlfriend got us here.”

  “Cam’s not here. You are.” He brushed his thumb across her lips. “You got me out of that coffeehouse. Hell, you got me out of Hidden Hills. I’d still be rotting away in there, thinking Major Denver was a traitor.”

  “Did you think I’d let you languish at Hidden Hills and get out of our engagement? When the guy on the phone told me you didn’t remember me, I thought it was a convenient way for you to get out of marrying me.”

  “As if I’d want to do that.” He kissed her, really kissed her, for the first time since they’d reconnected, and the touch of her lips felt like coming home.

  He buried his hands in her hair and deepened the kiss as they connected over the pictures of their daughter on the computer screen. He whispered against her mouth, “I love you, Paige.”