The Honor Anthology

by Emily Snow

  As I moved her muscles tensed and gripped me tighter.

  “Oh God.” She cried out and I knew she was moments away from reaching her climax.

  The sound of her voice was music to my ears. I was getting close because it had been a long time for me as well.

  “Oh, Ryder . . . I’m going to . . .”

  “Me too, Kay.”

  I was exhausted after my release. I slid out of her and got up to find the bathroom. In the mirror I took a long look at myself. What the hell was I doing? Our chance meeting couldn’t have come at a worse time. Navy life was unstable, she seemed to just be transitioning here as well. Get out, get out now. I tried to tell myself to no avail.

  When I came back, she pulled the sheets back, inviting me in. I slid in beside her and she melted against my chest. I wrapped both arms around her. God, if I didn’t get to have this again, I would make sure to cherish this memory for a long time to come.

  At some point in the early hours of the morning, I was of course rock hard again. She reached down and squeezed my cock with her hand. “You don’t mind if I borrow this, do you?”

  The shyness from the night before was gone. She slid over on top and mounted me. As much as I didn’t want to, I grabbed her hips to make her stop. “Don’t we need to use something?”

  “Well, I’m on the pill. I know I’m clean. Are you?” She surprised me when leaned down for another passionate kiss.

  “Yes, I am. I never have sex without protection,” I admitted.

  “Well, looks like today is going to be your lucky day. I want to feel you. All of you inside me.”

  I had no idea what her plans were, but I was going to give the lady what she wanted and more. There was nothing I wanted more than to be inside her with nothing between us.

  At first I hesitated, wondering how many others might have received that invitation. My gut told me she wasn’t that kind of woman. She was just as beautifully flawless on the inside. I felt lucky to be here with her, and maybe she was feeling the same. I wanted to push in rough and hard, but thought she needed a gentle touch. I mentally told myself to slow it down and take it easy.

  As soon as the length of me was inside, she commanded me to “fuck her hard”. Those words let something snap inside of me. I did just that. I pushed her over onto her side and reentered. I grabbed a handful of her hair and pulled it as I moved inside her. “Damn, you feel so good, Kay,” I growled into her ear. Her body felt perfect next to mine. It scared the shit out of me. I’ve spent so long not wanting to connect to anyone. Now here I was in bed with a woman that made me feel like I wanted to keep and protect her. As long as she’d have me, I’d be here for her.

  When we finished, she fell onto her back and brushed the wild curls from in front of her face.

  “I want you to know something, Ryder. I don’t do casual. Ever. You are my first one-night stand.”

  “I was hoping this wasn’t going to be just for one night,” I said in response. I don’t know what possessed me to admit that to her.

  “Grad school,” she said into the darkness.

  “Grad school?”

  “The last time I had sex was right before I finished grad school. I had been dating this guy named Ricky Deluca and found out the next day that he had been sleeping with my best friend behind my back the whole time.”

  “That sucks.”

  “Yeah, but it helped me to move on. Get my priorities in order. I’m here, starting my residency program at Jacksonville.”

  The comment took me back as I calculated how long medical school took. Kay was some kind of prodigy to have gotten so far.

  “Residency, that’s great. How old are you?”

  “I’m twenty-five. And you?”

  “Twenty-one.”

  As soon as I said it, she rolled over on her side so that we were face-to-face. I braced myself for her to tell me I was too young or that she wanted someone her age. She reached out, tickling my earlobe with her fingertips.

  “Wow. The four-year difference, does that make me a cougar?” she asked, giving me a blank look.

  “Only if you want to be,” was my response. “Why was it since grad school? You still hung up on him or something?” She hadn’t made me promises of anything, but I wanted to know why it was that she chose me to be the one to end this dry spell.

  “Oh, I don’t know. I saw you in that uniform, and suddenly all logical thought left my head.”

  I knew she was teasing. I leaned over and smacked her ass. “How amusing. So there’s no one around here in Jacksonville?”

  “Well, that’s the truth. I was willing to give up going to college out of state and change everything just to be with Ricky. I thought he was the one back then. I know I was too young to feel that way, but everything about us felt real to me. I realized that there was no reason for me to stay. So I left for school, put all of my efforts into getting on the Dean’s list and staying there. Now here I am starting my residency.” She said it all matter-of-fact like her choices were the most logical things. “What about you, sailor? Do you have a girl in every port?”

  “No, ma’am, I don’t. I won’t lie and say I’ve been a boy scout, but I’ve never made promises to anyone. Going into the Navy was something I always wanted to do. It’s hard enough without adding in the mix of a long-distance relationship.” She studied my face; I knew she was looking to see if I was telling the truth.

  “Doesn’t it get lonely?”

  “It does, but I’ve been a loner most of my life. Those guys you met tonight are the only friends I have.”

  “I can understand that. My workload with classes was tough. I spent most of my time with my nose stuck in a book for school. If I wasn’t studying, I had my nose stuck in a book to relax.”

  “That’s something else we seem to have in common. So, I want to know, Kay, do you consider me a bad boy?”

  “Hmm … I’m not sure, but I think I’d like to stick around and find out.”

  I pulled her close to me and kissed her hard. Then Kay got me ready for round two. Afterward, we laid there for at least another hour just talking. Well, she talked and I listened. I loved watching the way her beautiful face changed as she became animated in her conversation, or the exciting way her voice sped up as she talked about medicine.

  After a quick shower and a cup of coffee, she got dressed for her first day. I put on my clothes from the night before. We got to the Beetle, and she was going to drop me back off at the boat to meet the guys on her way to the university. We made small talk.

  As we were almost back to the pier, she asked me the million dollar question. “So, Ryder, are you going to see me again?”

  I wanted to shout hell yeah! I knew what my life was like, and I didn’t want to have complications.

  “We did have some fun together,” I replied.

  “I’m not trying to scare you or pin you down for a commitment. It’s just, like I said, I don’t do casual, and with my schedule, I don’t have time for anything that would be distracting. School comes first for me. When I have free time and you have free time, I would like it if we could spend it together.”

  “I’d like that too. I’ll have a better idea of my schedule once I get back to the boat. I’ll call you later.”

  “I’ll be waiting for you, Ryder.”

  She may have read a lot of books, but I could tell that she wasn’t going to believe in the fairytale. She had her head on straight, and I liked that.

  We said our goodbyes and kissed one last time. Then I got out of the car and stood to watch as she pulled away.

  I knew then I was starting something with her; whatever name we put on it didn’t matter. I was out of my element.

  I turned and looked up ahead at the brilliant black submarine in dry-dock sitting up on four huge blocks. People were all over it, resembling ants quick about working on it and repairing every inch of it before it set foot in the water again. It was something to behold; my heart swelled with a sense of pride as I watched t
he sparks fly off of the metal. She was opened up with big holes on the side of her to make repairs.

  I wasn’t sure if I’d see Kay again. Right now, what I wanted wasn’t important. There was work to be done.

  Chapter 4

  “NUB got laid last night,” Elmo announced to the group as we sat down to eat.

  “Good for you. She was a sweet little thing,” Missouri said.

  “Just don’t be out there making babies. I hope you wrapped it up,” Elmo added.

  My mind immediately went back to the moment earlier in the day when she asked me to fuck her not only raw, but hard. “Harder, Ryder!” were the words she said that unhinged me.

  “Hello. Are you with us, NUB?” Neil waved a hand in front of my face.

  I pulled out of my daze. “Neil, get your fucking hand out of my face,” I said as I batted it away.

  “Was she good?” Elmo asked then wiggled his eyebrows.

  I wasn’t going to acknowledge his question, let alone reply to it. I put my head down and concentrated on my fork as I ate.

  “Come on, guys, he obviously doesn’t want to talk about it. Performance issues have happened to all of us at least one time in our lives,” Missouri joked.

  “The fuck you say?” Elmo jumped into the conversation per usual. “I have NEVER had a performance issue in my life.”

  Soon, their attention was drawn from me as Elmo felt the need to go back into his many sexual exploits. I laughed with them, but my heart wasn’t really into it. Their voices blurred together until they just faded in the back.

  “Did you hear the news?” blurted Missouri, pulling me out of my daze.

  We had gotten our schedule. We had thirty days before we had to go back out. That meant we would spend duty time on the boat working on fixing her up. Getting things ready.

  That also meant I had thirty days to cram in as much time as I could with that beautiful brown-eyed girl.

  For the next few weeks, I spent every spare minute I could with Kay. Whenever I was away from her, the daytime seemed to drag on forever. I couldn’t wait to get relieved so I could call Kay on her next break. She was pulling 12-hour shifts for the next few days. She told me that normally it was only three, but she added extra so that she could take care of one of the kids who was having major surgery. In the short amount of time that she had been on her residency, she was attached to the little guy.

  My chest swelled with a sense of pride when I thought about her and the work she was doing. Being a doctor wasn’t an easy road. There was so much time spent studying and gaining knowledge to do the job. I knew she had the dedication part down pat. There was also flexibility, at least in this stage of the game.

  She didn’t always get to have a say in where she went and what she did. I could see why having a relationship would have been hard for her with a regular guy. For me, I had lots of understanding in that department, because at the end of the day, I was going to be asking her to do the same for me.

  I was already half asleep in bed when the phone buzzed. I sat straight up and reached for it. I pressed the button to answer and held it up to my ear. “Hello.”

  “Hey, Ryder. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you up. Things were just crazy tonight.”

  “Don’t worry about it. I’m happy to hear from you.” For a minute, she didn’t say anything. I waited and used the pause to wake up a little more. “Is everything okay?”

  “Yes,” she said and started sobbing.

  “Oh, babe, what’s wrong?”

  “One of our patients died tonight. She was an older woman who was terminal, but it just … It was hard being there when it happened.”

  “I’m so sorry. Wait. Why are you with older patients? Aren’t you in pediatrics?”

  “Yes, but we’re required to work rotation, and I go where I am sent. The learning experience is good. I just don’t know if I can handle the death part.”

  “I’m sorry you had to deal with that tonight.”

  “Thanks, Ryder. I knew that calling you would make me feel better. Thanks.”

  “Anytime.”

  “Maybe we can meet at the bar on Friday and spend the weekend together?”

  “As nice as that sounds, I can’t make it on Friday—I have plans. But if you were up to it, I’d love for you to have dinner with me.”

  I wanted to see her, and I wanted to see my folks. That seemed like a simple solution to the problem. I replayed the conversation with mom in my head trying to make sense of it.

  I would have pushed their visit back, but mom insisted. She was elusive with the details. “I’ll let your father tell you when we see you,” she had said and I could hear the excitement in her voice.

  I don’t know a time when my father ever had something up his sleeve. But it was important to her that I made myself available, so of course I’d do it, no questions asked.

  When I came out of my room Missouri stood in front of me with his arms folded.

  “Did you just do what I think you did?” Missouri said. I swear, between him and Elmo, a man couldn’t take a shit in peace. One or the other was always up my ass.

  “What is it that you think I did?” I asked back, answering his question with another question.

  “You just invited your girlfriend to meet the parents.”

  “So?” I don’t understand what he’s talking about.

  “SO! Let me tell you something: your girl is going to interpret this invitation to meet your parents as a signal that you think your relationship is relatively serious. I’m pretty damn sure your parents are going to see it the same way,” he explained, giving me a sympathetic look.

  “Fuck me. Well, hopefully no one would make a fuss over meeting each other.”

  “I don’t know what the big deal is, kid. You guys play house together every chance you get. Next thing you know, you’ll be looking for joint base housing and putting a ring on her finger,” Elmo said, holding up one of his stubby digits.

  “Slow down, no one said anything about that. We’re barely dating.”

  “No. You’re definitely dating. Seriously dating. About to take the next step. You’re just too stupid to know it.”

  Maybe he was right, but I didn’t care. I was crazy about Kay.

  I had early leave on Friday, which allowed me to spend most of the day with my parents. I took them around Jacksonville to show them most of the sights. They had booked a room at the Omni. We had taken a water taxi down to the location of the restaurant we were having dinner at. It was weird. Whatever it was that mom said dad had up his sleeve, he hadn’t hinted to it at all during the day.

  Then again, I never hinted about who was joining us for dinner. They had assumed it was Missouri or Elmo from my crew.

  We got seated and ordered drinks while we waited. It wasn’t like Kay to be late, so I sent a text just to verify that she had the right time and location.

  Me: I’m here where are you?

  K: Speed walking there now, see you in a min.

  “Excuse me, I’ll be right back,” I said to my folks, then pushed my chair out and headed out the entrance to look for Kay. There she was, hurrying down the cobblestone sidewalk in front of the restaurant. When she saw me, she picked up the pace and when we met, I lifted her up into my arms and kissed her good and hard.

  “Well, hello Sailor!” she exclaimed, then slid her hand down between us. “Is that something in your pocket or is someone happy to see me?” She looked up at me and wiggled her eyebrows.

  I leaned down and whispered in her ear. “Yes. Every single inch of me is happy to see you. Looking forward to seeing the rest of you later, naked and coming undone underneath me.”

  “Good,” she said with a smirk.

  “Now I’m going to think of things like reactor theory to stop my cock from embarrassing the hell out of me.”

  She kissed me on the cheek. I held the door to let her through first, then took her hand and brought her to the table. My dad immediately stood and extended a hand. My m
other stood and gave her a warm embrace. This was all before proper introductions had even taken place.

  “It’s so nice to meet you. I’m Mags and this is Colin,” mom said, then took another sip of her water. “I’m sorry to seem so shocked. Ryder didn’t tell us we’d have the pleasure of meeting you today, Kay.”

  Kay pressed her lips together into a forced smile. “Yes. I know, he’s the strong silent type. I would have dressed better if I had known.” Kay then shot me the if-looks-could-kill death glare. The guys were right. I’m screwed.

  “Oh, don’t apologize! You look sweet as a button,” mom said, and then she and Kay proceeded to have their own private conversation. Mom pulled out her purse and shared all the pictures she carried of me since childhood.

  After dinner and before dessert, dad had an odd look about him. “Ryder, come outside and have a pre-dessert smoke with your old man.”

  What? As far as I knew, I didn’t smoke and Dad didn’t either. We got outside and dad dug something out of his inside jacket pocket. He handed one rolled cigar to me and placed the other in his mouth.

  “I thought this would be the perfect way to celebrate. My old man had a cigar with me after I had gotten my Dolphins the next time I was home.” How is it that I never knew that? “Well. I wanted to say, welcome to the club. Always respect the boat and the crew. You are now part of the ship. Your blood, tears, and sweat, along with that of every other person who serves now or ever served, is the soul of the ship. Never forget that, and always respect the boat and the crew.” After dad finished, he lit my cigar, and then his own. I took maybe half a puff before I started choking incessantly. It was awful. He just chuckled. “Yeah, it was pretty bad when I had a smoke with my old man too, but it’s tradition.”

  Dad never shared personal stories like this. I always thought he loved my sisters more than me. This experience was something of my own.

  He took both of the cigars and put them out, then tossed them into the smoke can outside on the patio. “I also wanted to give you this. You’ve earned it.”