Raw- Rebirth

by Belle Aurora

  “These buildings were unkind,” he went on. “And I’m still not okay with what these houses did to a couple of innocent kids.”

  Well, shit. My nose began to tingle. “Oh, honey.”

  Tell me what to do, my love. Tell me how to make it better. Name it and it will be yours.

  My beautiful man.

  My survivor.

  My knight in scuffed armor.

  “These houses set in motion a chain of events that led to us finding each other over and over again, and I’m sorry for how we started out, but, fuck me, I’m grateful to these houses that you’re here with me. Right here. Right now. So...” He licked his lips, turning to face me, and when he cupped my cheeks and placed a gentle kiss to my forehead, I closed my eyes and listened to what he had to say. “What we’re gonna do is knock down these nasty houses. We’re going to watch them go down. Watch every brick and every fuckin’ splinter of these shitholes be knocked to the goddamn ground. See every cruel word and slamming door be blown away to nothing. And where our pasts lay in ruins, we’re going to build a wish.”

  Oh, fuck.

  My shoulders shook. I was already crying.

  The gravity of our situation hit me hard, like a hammer to the heart.

  We made it.

  We made it.

  We were here, together, working on our future. And with every ounce of my being, I couldn’t think of anywhere else I’d like to live than the bones of where it all began.

  Truth was, it didn’t matter where we lived. A house was only a body. And we were the heart. For as long as we were together, nothing could take that away from us.

  As he kissed my lips, I cried faintly then sniffled. “Yes.”

  Twitch pulled back to look into my eyes. “Okay?

  “Okay.” I laughed through my tears.

  Moving to stand behind me, he wrapped his arms around my waist and rested his chin on my head. I lifted a hand to his forearm and squeezed. That was when he uttered, “I’ve got plans for this place.”

  Oh, Lord. I bet he did.

  And just because I could, I threw a spanner in the works.

  “I’m pregnant.”

  Twitch stilled at my back and I smiled slowly, widely. And when he regained movement in his limbs, his arms tightened around me hard enough to make it hard to breathe. But I didn’t mind.

  When he put his mouth to the shell of my ear, and whispered, “Love you,” my world was complete.

  And in the midafternoon of a beautiful spring day, we stood at the bones of a memory and made plans for our future.

  ***

  Twitch

  My head was a mess. I didn’t know what to do, how to feel. But in all the anarchy of my generally chaotic mind, one thought played on repeat.

  What a wild credence that all I had been chasing had finally stopped running.

  Epilogue

  Lexi

  I threw the door open and squealed happily when I saw them. The little redhead lunged at me, and when her body collided with mine, my breath left me with a whoosh. Struggling to breathe, I laughed through the discomfort as my unlikely best friend and I met for the first time.

  “Lily,” the broody giant still waiting at the door with his offspring grumbled, “you’re choking the life out of her.”

  But Lily just hugged me tighter. “I don’t care. I’ve got five months of hugs bursting out of me right now, and she’s going to get them or so help me.”

  It all started a month after we arrived in the states. Twitch made a phone call to an old friend. That old friend was a man named Nox. During the phone call, Twitch explained to Nox that I was having a bit of a hard time dealing with the unfamiliarity of our living situation. At the end of the call, Twitch surprisingly handed me the phone, and the woman on the other line started talking.

  I wasn’t expecting the hurricane that was Lily. And what a godsend she was.

  One phone call was all it took and, just like that, we connected

  Not a day went by that Lily and I didn’t speak. Whether via phone call or text, we were as familiar as two people living in different states could be. So when Lily called to say they were coming down to visit her sister, I was over the freaking moon.

  To meet your unlikely soul mate was a special thing.

  And now that she was here, I felt like I was already mourning the loss of her, for in a week, she’d be gone.

  I held on tighter.

  When she finally pulled back, I looked into her smiling eyes and stupidly said, “Hey.”

  Lily tipped back her head and roared with laughter. I couldn’t help but join her. When the laughter started to hurt, I held onto my distended belly and groaned through my mirth. “Ow.”

  “Aw.” Lily put her hands on my baby bump and gently rubbed it. “How is my little guy?”

  I took in a deep breath and let out a slow exhale. “How would you feel having someone lug you around in your comfy water bed, never ending room service, sleeping all the time?”

  “Pretty damn good.” Lily’s brows arched.

  My smile widened as I peered down at my belly. “He’s great.”

  From the door, Nox uttered an amused, “So, are we allowed in or what?”

  My cheeks blazed. I rushed over and swept them in. “Oh my God, yes! Come in. Come in!”

  As he passed me, Nox planted a kiss on my cheek. “How you doing, Lex?”

  “Great, now that you guys are here,” I told him before looking at the handsome boy by his side. He had dark hair and blue eyes. “Oh, Lord. Is that Rocco?” I knew it was and turned to Lily. “He’s so tall. What are you feeding him?”

  Rocco, who was ten going on eleven, looked embarrassed as his mother moved to stand behind him and explained, “It’s just those good Taylor genes, babe.”

  The little princess holding Nox’s hand was something else in her tutu. It was a shock to see her wearing the tiniest pair of black combat boots I’d ever seen. She had Nox’s dark hair, but Lily’s green eyes. I smiled down at her. “Hello, sweetie. What’s your name?”

  Of course I knew her name. I got pictures of these kids on the daily, but I felt it was important to include the children, let them know they had a voice in this house.

  “I’m Angie. I’m four.” She held up four fingers and I loved her right then. She looked me dead in the eye and did not hesitate, when she stated, “You’re pretty.”

  Oh, sweet Jesus.

  I couldn’t help myself. I reached out and tugged her into me for a long hug. Angie returned my hug and I narrowed my eyes on Lily. “You set that up, didn’t you?”

  Lily laughed. “I swear I didn’t!”

  In Nox’s arms was a tiny girl with red cheeks, sucking her thumb in the sweetest little dress I had ever seen. She was the spitting image of Lily. Thick ginger hair and green eyes. She also looked like she did not want to leave the safety of her daddy’s arms, and looking at Nox, I could see why. He was a tank of a man.

  Nox kissed the little angel’s head. “This is Mia.” He sighed. “She missed her nap and now we’re all paying for it.”

  Lily rolled her eyes at her husband’s dramatics. “I give her ten minutes before she passes out.”

  My expression sympathetic, I rubbed the little girl’s back, and spoke softly, “Maybe we can put on a movie for little Mia. We have pillows and blankets. My son A.J. can make you a fort. Does that sound good?” Mia thought about that before sucking her thumb into her mouth, moping dismally. Finally, she nodded, and I smiled widely at the tired angel. “Okay, sweetheart.”

  When A.J. ran into the house from the backyard, he screeched to a stop at the realization that we had company. As he did often these days, he took his time observing the people around him. It took a few seconds, but when he deemed it safe, he stepped forward.

  I stepped around him and put my hands to his shoulders, proudly introducing my son. “This is A.J. He just turned six.” Lily and Nox said their hellos, but A.J. seemed to be stuck on his words. “Say hi, honey.”
<
br />   “Hello,” he forced out, looking away.

  The poor thing. He sounded as awkward as he felt. Unfortunately, it took A.J. some time to open up to people these days. He, understandably, didn’t trust easily. He didn’t talk as freely. He was somewhat reclusive amongst company. My son was in therapy, but the therapist warned that she couldn’t help if A.J. wouldn’t speak to her.

  I prayed that he would find the strength to push past the fear and angst, and regain the part of himself he’d lost. In the meantime, all I could do was love him and support him wholeheartedly as he found his way out of the hole Ling had thrown him in.

  “Well...” I gently squeezed A.J.’s shoulders. “I hope you guys are hungry. Twitch is firing up the grill as we speak and we have enough food to feed an army.”

  Nox’s eyes lit up in interest. “I am hungry.”

  Lily peered over at her husband slowly. “You’re always hungry.”

  Nox grinned at his wife tenderly, and I loved that so much my chest ached.

  A.J. gathered all the pillows out from around the place. The kids worked on building a fort suitable for Mia as Lily and Nox followed me out back. Twitch did a double take, and when his eyes landed on our guests, his eyes crinkled in the corners. “My man.”

  Stepping forward, he and Nox clasped hands before bumping shoulders and slapping each other on the back hard enough to bruise. Nox gripped Twitch by the shoulders. “It’s been a while.”

  “No shit,” muttered Twitch. They stared at each other a long time, surveying the changes in each other before I saw the emotions get the better of my husband and he pulled back, swallowing hard, then uttering, “You need a beer.”

  But Nox seemed to know Twitch better than I assumed, and as my man walked away from the group and into the house, Nox turned to me, grinning roguishly. “Some things never change.”

  “No,” I agreed quietly, fighting a smile.

  The evening went on without a hitch. Everyone had eaten. The kids finally warmed to each other and played inside all night as little Mia slept through the noise. The conversation was a fountain, flowing and never ending, full of joy and laughter, and as the night slowed, I didn’t want our friends to leave.

  Lily joined me in the kitchen as the guys continued catching up outside, and as we loaded the dishwasher, somebody tugged my shirt.

  Startled, I looked down at my son. His eyes were stuck on the little girl wearing a tutu and combat boots. He didn’t address either of us as he spoke gently. “She didn’t tell me her name.” His voice was far away. “What’s her name?”

  He was acting strange. I was momentarily dumbstruck.

  Lily’s eyes darted between us until she uttered, “Her name is Angela. We call her Angie.”

  A small smile stretched his lips. “Angie,” he murmured dreamily. And when he peered up at me and said what he said, my heart stopped. He spoke quietly, sincerely, and he held such determination in his tone that I found myself believing him. “I’m going to marry that girl.”

  My mouth gaped. So did Lily’s.

  But A.J. didn’t notice. He only had eyes for the dark-haired, green-eyed girl who had apparently stolen his heart. Before either of us could speak, A.J. floated away, back to the group of kids playing by the sofa, leaving both Lily and me dumbstruck.

  When I found my voice, it was weak. “He doesn’t know what he’s saying.”

  Lily jumped on that. “Right. He’s just a little boy.”

  “Exactly,” I forced out on an awkward laugh. “Oh my, kids definitely do say the darndest things.” I licked my lips and faltered. “But still. Maybe we should...”

  Lily added gently, “...not tell the guys about this?”

  I was so glad we were on the same page. “Yes,” I rushed out.

  And she nodded, swallowing hard. “Agreed.”

  “Great.”

  “Cool.”

  And as we conversed politely, I couldn’t help but notice that neither of us could take our eyes off of the peculiar way Angie and A.J. sat together on the sofa. Angie held her handheld gaming console in her hands, talking non-stop, explaining the aim of the game, and as she yammered on, A.J. watched her closely, his eyes searching her face, smiling softly to himself. And my chest ached.

  Oh, shit.

  My son was in love.

  The house was quiet. That was a rare event in itself. Sure, it was early, but silence was not as calming as it had once been. Especially not when I had to endure the time without my son as I had. Silence was daunting, and as I crept into his bedroom and found him fast asleep, my heart uncoiled and I allowed myself to breathe again.

  Sitting on the edge of his bed, I looked down into the angelic face of the boy who almost never came home. My hand moved without prompting, and as I touched his hair, I reminded myself that we were good.

  We were good.

  Being as quiet as I could, I let him sleep a while longer because he wasn’t broken in his dreams.

  Barefoot and pregnant, I made my way to the fridge and poured myself a glass of orange juice, then went in search of the man missing in action. It wasn’t often we woke separately, but when we did, I became restless.

  It didn’t take long, and when I pushed open the sliding door and stood in the open doorway dressed in only my nightie, he peered up at me a moment before continuing what he was doing. And with every second that passed, the mirth crept up my throat, dangerously wishing to escape. But I kept it on lock.

  Instead, I leaned against the doorframe, and uttered, “Once upon a time, I thought you were a god.” I sipped my juice. “And now look at you, doing laundry, hanging up my panties and bras.”

  I held the laughter down as much as I could, but when his eyes crinkled in laughter, he pointed at me in warning, and five of my bras hung from his forearm. I lost the battle, tipping my head back and let my light laughter free.

  He shook his head, but I didn’t miss the way his lip twitched. When he muttered, “Fuck you, baby,” it sounded more like, “I love you, baby,” and I couldn’t wipe the smile off my face.

  With my heart full and my baby kicking, I made to leave, and as I did, he called out, “You could help, you know.”

  I paused in the doorway, gazing over at him, and my brows rose.

  This guy.

  “I’ve done laundry for six long years, honey.” I started to close the sliding door between us, and as I did, I sassily stated, “It’s officially your turn.”

  He mock-glared at me through the glass.

  I blew him a kiss.

  He went on clipping my panties and bras on the clothes line. And I’d never been more content in my life.

  Days turned to weeks. Weeks turned to months. Months turned to years.

  The old oak in the backyard, the same oak I had carved the name of the boy I swore I wouldn’t forget at the age of seven, now bore the names of each additional family member we welcomed into our brood.

  It had become tradition.

  Later that year, another name would be carved into the Falco oak.

  And my heart and soul settled as my family grew.

  The soft cries coming from the nursery had me shooting up in bed, momentarily confused and fretful enough to make me sweat. But he was already up and out the door. And when he returned with the little bundle, I switched on the lamp as he set her down gently between us.

  Her nostrils flared and her mouth pulled down, her lips trembling as her little arms attempted to break free of her muslin restraint. No. She wasn’t happy, our little dame. And we both knew why.

  Blinking sleepily, I reached up to unhook the front of my bra and lowered the cup before gently lifting my sweet little girl and holding her to my breast. She latched on quickly, my little piggy, and did her thing as her father leaned on his side, propping himself up drowsily on his elbow, watching us both lovingly as she ate her fill.

  My husband stroked the wispy hairs at the back of her head, and whispered sleepily, “Slow down, Fia. Momma’s not goin’ anywhere.”
>
  My heart could barely take how much love I had inside me. It was strong, overflowing, and as it settled over me like a warm blanket, I wondered if it would ever get old.

  Chances were, it wouldn’t. And I was okay with that. In fact, I was counting on it.

  Twitch was somewhat of a voyeur these days, especially when it came to his children. He loved to watch A.J. do his homework, priding our eldest on his smarts. He adored watching Matteo fall on his little tush, trying in vain to stop his little legs from falling out from underneath him as he attempted to run before he could even walk. But, most of all, he treasured every moment of Sofia’s feeding.

  His little princess, he called her. Daddy’s girl.

  I had a premonition she would be the apple of her father’s eye.

  Heck. She already was.

  So much he’d missed out on with our firstborn. He was making sure he didn’t miss out on another single second of their precious childhood.

  Scars.

  We had them in spades.

  But those scars had shaped us into the people we were today. And although our wounds had started out painful, the marks they left were permanent. Everlasting. And I was grateful for the reminder of how hard we had worked to be together.

  It told me a lot about us.

  Failure was never an option. Twitch and I would be together or die trying.

  There were days when I would sit back and watch my family thrive with such sentiment that I would silently excuse myself and weep in complete quiet, in secrecy, because the sheer force of the emotion was absolutely crippling.

  We had made it.

  Every day was a gift.

  We had made it, against all odds, taking the road less traveled.

  It was us against the world, and I would protect this family with every last fiber of my being.

  Which brings me to my point.

  A word of warning to those meaning to harm my family.

  My name is Alexa Falco. And I am not afraid anymore.

  Come for us.

  I dare you.

  I will take you the fuck down.

  The End.

  Raw:

  Rebirth

  A note from the author.

  I want to thank you all for your undying love for my complicated bad boy, Twitch.