by Sammie Grace
I smiled, “Kathy, I’m a lightweight, but I’ll have a beer if you have one.”
Mike said, “Coming right up.” He reached into a cooler and handed me a Coors Light.
Since the boat was full, I sat on the dock in front of it and dangled my legs over the water.
Marion asked, “Hey, Meggie. Have you heard from Betty?”
“Yeah, I just talked to her the other night. She’s in San Diego visiting an old friend of hers and having a great time.”
Dancing Kathy held up her martini and said, “Good for her.”
I glanced down the dock and noticed Joe Turner on his boat, the Summa Home. He was in the middle of laying a big kiss on a blond with really big hair. I commented, “Gee, I met Joe and his wife the other day, and that isn’t the same woman I met.”
They all looked at each other and started laughing.
Marion informed me in a whisper, “That’s because it isn’t his wife.”
I raised my eyebrows.
Dancing Kathy explained, “That’s Number Two.”
I was confused, “Number Two?”
She nodded, “Yep. He calls his wife Number One and that’s his girlfriend Rosie. She’s Number Two.”
I probably had a shocked look on my face because they all laughed.
Sexy Cathy sang, “He’s hopelessly devoted to two.” Then she continued, “I guess it isn’t funny, especially for Number One or Two for that matter, but we all get a kick out of watching the hanky-panky.
Dancing Kathy said, “I always tell Mike, if he ever pulls something like that, I’ll make Lorena Bobbitt look like a surgeon.”
At that remark, all the guys adjusted their shorts.
I shook my head and said, “Boy, I guess you never know.”
Marion said, “When you get a little older, Meggie, things like that won’t shock you as much. Men can be dogs.”
Kenny got his back up. “Hey, women can be just as brutal. I work with a guy whose wife is screwing around with their dentist.”
Mike said, “That’s giving getting a filling a whole new meaning.”
We all laughed at that one.
I said, “I don’t think I’m ever getting married.”
Marion said, “They’re not all assholes, Meggie. You just have to weed through the crap, and then you’ll find the right one to be in the trenches with.”
I told them, “Well, I haven’t had much luck lately with men, so I’m taking a break.”
Dancing Kathy said, “That’s exactly what I was doing when I met Mike. I was taking a hiatus from dating and wham. I looked across that funeral parlor and there he was.”
Marion and I said at the same time, “You met at a funeral?”
Kathy said, “Yeah, my Great-aunt Sophie’s death was the best thing that ever happened to me. Not so good for Aunt Sophie, but she was eighty-seven. Mike grew up next door to her. Mike and his parents came to the funeral, I took one look at him, and that was it.”
Mike said, “I tried to shake her off, but she got her teeth into me, and I’ve been her lap dog ever since.”
Kathy smiled and said, “His tail is still wagging after all these years.”
I love to know how people met, so I asked Marion how she and Pierce found each other.
She said, “Well, Pierce and I met at an orphans’ dance. We were in separate orphanages in Massachusetts. He was in an all-boys, and I was in an all-girls. The two homes would take turns hosting dances throughout the year. Well, this particular one was hosted by the boys. I was incredibly shy back then and I was sitting with a bunch of my friends with my head down staring at the floor. I was terrified someone would ask me to dance. A pair of huge feet appeared in front of me and I looked up to see this dorky guy with this huge grin on his face. He put his hand out, I took it, and we went to dance. Pierce is the worst dancer in the world. His arms and legs were all over the place, gawky as hell. I figured, hey, I can dance better than he does, and all of a sudden my fear vanished. We danced all night. I realized that night after dancing and talking with him that he was the nicest guy in the world. I fell in love with the goofiest guy I’d ever met. Pierce was a year ahead of me in school and won a scholarship to Penn State. When I graduated high school, he convinced me to move there. We married when he graduated, and the rest is history.”
Sexy Cathy said, “That’s so sweet.”
Dancing Kathy said to Kenny and Sexy Cathy, “How about you guys?”
Kenny cleared his throat and said, “Well, I’d been out of college a couple of years. I was a grain broker. I got a little bored living in St. Louis, so I connected with a headhunter who got me a good lead on a job in Rhode Island. I jumped on a plane and went out for an interview. Cathy was a flight attendant on the plane. I was seated in the back of the plane, she kept coming back to talk to me, and when we landed, slipped me her number. Of course, that kind of thing happens to me all the time.”
Sexy Cathy rolled her eyes said sarcastically, “Sure it does.”
Kenny said, “She never believes me when I say that. Anyway, I called her the following week, and she invited me to go to a wedding with her. She has a huge family. I don’t know who I fell in love with first, her or her family. I got the job in Rhode Island, and we started to get serious. Eventually, I convinced her to give up flying and marry me.”
Sexy Cathy said, “Sometime I’ll tell you guys my version of the story.”
Dancing Kathy changed the subject. “Meggie, I heard a rumor you and Ian were dating.”
“No,” I said, “just a rumor. Ian isn’t really interested.”
Mike said, “Well, he’s a fool. If I were younger, you’d be just the kind of girl I’d go out with.”
I smiled at him and said, “Thanks, Mike, I appreciate that.”
I had finished my beer and decided I’d better get back to the cottage and get ready for Helen’s arrival tomorrow. I thanked them for the beer and left. I turned into a cleaning demon and by 9:30 the cottage was sparkling. I was exhausted and hit the hay early.
CHAPTER SEVEN
Even though I’m devastated about Ian, I woke up in a good mood. Helen was coming today and I knew she’d cheer me up. The store had a lot of traffic with the fishermen dropping by to brag about their trip to the canyon. Everyone did exceptionally well, bagging a couple of nice-sized tuna, and some good-sized mahi mahi. Only one chicken wing was found in the bunch, so I guess Mo was off the hook in the future. At 10:00 I had a little lull. I was alone in the store when Helen walked in. She’s one of my best friends, but secretly, sometimes I hate her. After a six-hour drive, she looked like she just stepped out of a beauty salon.
If Helen wanted another career besides engineering, she could have been a Sports Illustrated swimsuit model. She is tall, five-eleven, with long, blond hair, and a beautiful face with enormous blue eyes. Along with all that, she’s slim with big boobs, a tiny waist, and legs that go on forever. One of the advantages of hanging out with her was that you can always count on meeting a lot of men. She’s always been a man magnet.
She spotted me and we both screamed.
I said, “Oh my God, you’re a sight for sore eyes.”
She gave me a big hug, took a look around, and said, “So, this is the marina?”
“Yep. I’m so glad you’re here.”
“Me too. I need this vacation so much. I’m glad I left early; the traffic wasn’t bad at all.”
“Let me help you with your luggage, and I’ll get you settled in the cottage.”
I hung a Be Right Back sign on the door, picked up one of Helen’s two bags, and took her over to the cottage.
She looked around the house and glanced out the window. “Wow, Meggie, it’s beautiful, what a view! I’ve never seen so many boats.”
“It’s one of th
e biggest marinas in the area.”
She stretched and said, “I can’t wait to just lie out in the sun and relax. I’m going to be a lazy bum and enjoy every minute of it.”
I told her, “Well, I’m going to try to take a little time off, but unfortunately, I’ll be working most of the time. You can lie out on the deck, though, and I can tell you how to get to the beach. We’ll be able to do stuff together in the evenings.”
“That would be great. I’m just here to spend time with you and veg.”
I put her in Gram’s bedroom.
I asked, “Are you hungry?”
“Not really, but I’d kill for a cup of coffee.”
“Hel, why don’t you get settled. I’ll run over to the Snack Shack and get you a cup of joe.”
“You’re a lifesaver.”
“Be right back”
When I got to the Shack, Mo was sitting at the counter having a cup of coffee with Dancing Kathy.
Mo said, “Hey, Meggie. Anything new with you and Ian?”
I quickly filled them in on Jimmy’s visit and told them about Ian seeing us in the parking lot.
Mo told me, “I could make sure he finds out the truth. This here’s gossip central.”
“Frankly, Mo, I give up. He can think whatever he wants. I don’t understand men, and I’m tired of trying to. Can I get a cup of coffee to go? My friend Helen just arrived, and she’s in desperate need of some caffeine.”
“Sure.” She got up to get the coffee and said, “You’ll have to bring her over and introduce her.”
“Oh, I will. She’s a little burnt out from the drive.”
Kathy got up and was looking out the window. Puzzled, she said, “I wonder what those guys are looking at?”
Mo said, “What do you mean?”
Kathy said, “Well, I can see at least four guys with binoculars. Oh, I see what they’re looking at. I think that must be your friend, Meggie.”
Mo and I went to the window and looked out. Helen was on Gram’s deck in a very tiny black bikini, bent over putting a towel on a chaise lounge.
Mo shook her head and said, “Dang, that’s the body I was supposed to have.”
“Me too,” said Kathy.
The door to the Shack opened and in walked Tony Maroni.
He looked at me and smiled. “Okay, Meggie. Who’s the goddess?”
I laughed and said, “That’s my friend I told you about, Helen Jakowski.”
Dreamy-faced, Tony announced, “My Polish Princess has arrived. I think I’ll go introduce myself.”
I handed him the cup of coffee and said, “Here, she might be nicer to you if you show up with this.”
He took the coffee and said, “Thanks. Have a good day, ladies. I know I will.” He winked at us and swaggered toward the cottage.
We all watched from the window. Tony walked up on the deck and started talking to Helen. We couldn’t tell what they were saying, but Helen picked up her towel, wrapped it around her waist like a sarong, and then they proceeded hand in hand down to Tony’s boat.
Mo whistled. “That took about two minutes. People shouldn’t be allowed to be that good lookin’. It’s not fair to the rest of us mere mortals.”
I said, “Well, at least I know she’ll be entertained while I’m working.”
Mo said, “No doubt about it.”
Dancing Kathy snickered, “Oh, I think we’ll all be entertained.”
I laughed, said goodbye, and went back to work. Things slowed down quite a bit in the late afternoon, so I closed the store up at 4:00, and went down to A dock to look for Helen. Helen and Tony were sitting on the deck of his boat like two peas in a pod, having a beer.
Helen asked me, “Are you done for the day?”
“Yeah, I closed up early.”
Tony said, “Want a beer?”
“I’d love one. What have you two been up to this afternoon?”
Tony said, “Well, I took the Polish Princess here for a little boat ride and when we came back, she took a little nap down below.”
Helen sighed, “It was heaven. I never get to nap.”
I teased. “Are there mirrors on the ceiling down there?”
Tony snapped his fingers and said, “No, but that’s a good idea. I should have thought of that myself.”
I asked Helen, “What do you want to do tonight?”
She replied, “I’m up for anything.”
Tony piped up and asked, “Are you girls hungry? I know where the best food in the state is.”
I asked, “Where’s that?”
He said, “My parents’ house. It’s Paisano Sunday.”
Helen asked, “What’s Paisano Sunday?”
Tony said, “Once a month, we have a big family get together. All my aunts, uncles, and cousins show up and bring a dish. The best food anywhere. I was thinking of making an appearance. Would you girls like to join me?”
I looked at Helen. ”You decide.”
She shrugged her shoulders and said, “I’m game. Won’t your parents mind you showing up with two extra people?”
“No, they’re used to it. When I show up with you two beauties, I’ll reach legend status. Watch out for my uncle Guido, though; he’s right off the boat and likes to pinch booties. Most of the people will be hanging in the backyard, but if you go in the house, don’t sit on any chairs against the wall. Those are for the guys only. Guys in my family like to sit with their backs to the wall.”
Helen and I looked at each other and then back at Tony.
He held up a hand and said, “Don’t ask.”
I said, “Okay. What time do you want to leave?”
Tony suggested, “How about I head home, change, and pick you girls up in about an hour?”
I said, “Sounds good.”
Helen and I went back to the cottage to get changed.
Helen said, “You were holding out on me. You never mentioned Tony. I assume he isn’t the guy you’re interested in.”
“No, that was Ian. But that’s over.”
“What happened?”
I told her all about Ian and then about Jimmy showing up.
Stunned, she said, “I can’t believe Jimmy asked you to marry him. Thank God you said no.”
I was a little taken aback. “What do you mean? Jimmy isn’t all that bad.”
“Oh, come on, Meggie. Jimmy is a couch potato with hardly any personality. The fun factor just isn’t there. He’s a slug. You would’ve spent your whole life waiting on him while he watched ESPN.”
“Boy, I never knew you felt that way about him.”
She explained. “I never said a word because I didn’t want to hurt your feelings or our friendship. Laura and I were thrilled when you broke up. You’re too good for him. You like to have fun, go out, and do things. If you recall, Jimmy never wanted to do anything. Every time Jimmy did something with us, he looked totally miserable. He was holding you back from enjoying yourself. He would have eventually bored you to death. ”
I agreed. “You’re right. He would have.”
“It sounds like you really have a thing for Ian.”
“You can say that again. Not that it’s going to do me any good.”
“I wouldn’t give up on him yet, Meggie. It seems he cares about you. Otherwise, he wouldn’t have gotten jealous when he saw you with another guy, right?”
“I have a hard time believing that. We never really had an official date and he certainly didn’t knock himself out to spend time with me even before the Jimmy incident.”
“We’ll go out and raise some hell while I’m here. It’ll take your mind off him and maybe you’ll meet someone else.”
“I don’t want to meet anyone. My heart is tired of getting sto
mped on. I’ll go out and raise some hell, though.”
“Good girl. Now, tell me about the hunk I spent the day with. What do you know about him?”
“Well, I’m sure he told you a little bit about himself. What did you talk about all day?”
“Oh, he told me about his auto body business and showed me all around the boat. He gave me a little tour on the boat ride and pointed out landmarks like the Point Judith Lighthouse. Mostly we just bullshitted about this and that. What I want to know is, what’s up with his love life?”
I told her, “Ladies man with a capital L. You never see him with the same girl more than twice. Come to think of it, he’s like the male version of you.”
We laughed.
I continued. “When I first met him, I thought he was just a macho guy who thinks he’s God’s gift to the ladies. But, since I’ve gotten to know him, he’s actually really sweet.”
Helen said, “He sure is easy on the eyes. He has one of the best bodies I’ve ever seen on a straight guy.”
“That’s for sure.”
I put on a blue sundress and a pair of white sandals. Helen looked as stunning as usual, with a black short skirt that showed off her long legs and a white haltertop. She wore her long blond hair down, and I put mine in a ponytail.
Tony showed up in a black BMW. He took a look at us, blinked a few times, and said, “Now that is a vision.”
I looked at Helen and she rolled her eyes.
I commented, “Nice car.”
He shrugged, “Well, the ladies like it better than driving around in my truck.”
Helen matter-of-factly said, “I drive a truck. It comes in handy for work, and it’s easier to drive on the construction sites.”
Tony said, “Baby, you’re turning me on.”
We got in the car. Helen sat up front with Tony. I made him make a quick stop at the grocery store so we could pick up some flowers for his mother.
On the drive up, Helen asked him, “Do you always bring girls you’ve just met home to meet the family?”