Letting Misery Go

by Michelle Larks

  “Enough of that mushy stuff,” Alice remarked. “This is a happy occasion. We’re going to have a wedding, and we haven’t had one in a long time. This is going to be fun.”

  The women finished the cleaning chores in no time. Alice and Fred left, and Naomi and Montgomery left shortly afterward. Naomi promised to call her mother before she returned to Edwardsville.

  All told, Ruth nodded her head, and her mouth curved into a smile. Today was a good day for the Wilcox family, and they hadn’t had one of them in a long time either.

  Chapter Twenty-one

  By eight o‘clock that evening, Queen was asleep in Ruth’s guest bedroom, snoring lightly. The day had been a long one; with dinner starting at two o’clock. Ruth sat on the sofa in her den, wearing a comfortable lounging outfit. Her heart was full and she felt content. She thanked God for the blessings He’d bestowed upon her and her family that day.

  Naomi was full of exhilaration, and she seemed to be in love with Montgomery. Ruth had noticed Montgomery’s Jaguar when he and Naomi departed from Sarah’s home. Ruth couldn’t deny that the vibe between her and Aron was growing stronger, and she couldn’t deny that she was attracted to him.

  Alice had Fred, as well as Ruth, to lean on during her medical crisis. Ruth realized, whether she liked it or not, that Fred was a part of Alice’s life, and that she had to share her friend, just like she did when Alice married Martin.

  Life is good, Ruth mused. Then her thoughts centered on Daniel. She knew her ex-husband as well as she knew herself. Daniel was definitely trying to put the moves on her. And she wasn’t sure how she felt about that. She knew they weren’t the same people who were stuck in an acrimonious marriage.

  Ruth knew she had grown by leaps and bounds spiritually. She personified the term “late bloomer.” It took time for Ruth to find and accept herself for who she was. That acceptance included loving all her parts—her flaws and her good traits. She dedicated her life, much like her forefathers, to bringing people to the Christian fold. Ruth loved nothing more than spreading God’s Word. She was quite content with her lot in life.

  A minuscule part of her psyche wanted Daniel to come crawling back on his knees, begging her to take him back. Then another part of her inner self wanted to explore the possibility of a deeper relationship with Aron. She had never felt so comfortable with another male since she had met Daniel.

  The telephone jangled loudly, startling Ruth out of her thoughts. She picked up the cell phone and clicked it on. “Hello?” she said.

  “Hello, Ruth. I was just thinking about you, and wondered how you’re doing.” Aron’s caring tone warmed her soul.

  “Aron, I’m doing well. I’m sitting in my den, having a conversation with God.”

  “I’m not interrupting you, am I?” he asked solicitously, his voice deepening.

  “Trust me, God isn’t going anywhere. I can always continue my conversation with Him later.” Ruth relaxed, leaning against the back of the sofa.

  “I hear you on that.” Aron chuckled. His eyes traveled around the walls of his masculine den. “I hope I wasn’t out of place by coming to your daughter’s house. I told Monet that I could wait in the car, but she insisted I come inside.”

  “No, your coming to the house was fine. You had a chance to meet my family en masse. What I meant to say is that you were able to see Naomi. She hadn’t been home in such a long time. I realized how much I missed her when I saw her face. Even though we haven’t talked about her young man, I have a feeling she’s going to stay in Edwardsville after she graduates, instead of coming back to Chicago.”

  “Would that be such a terrible thing?” Aron asked.

  “I guess not.” Ruth sighed. “I guess I’m being selfish. My son, DJ, lives in Georgia, and I hate that he lives so far from the family. I guess with daughters it’s a little different. I wish Naomi and DJ lived closer, but I realize all three of my children have their own lives to lead—be it in Chicago or elsewhere.”

  “I can understand that. I love Monet and my sons to death, but I think I’m a little closer to Monet. As close as she was to her mother, she’s now become a daddy’s girl,” Aron said.

  “Sarah and I are close too, but at heart she, too, is a daddy’s girl. Naomi is a mama’s girl, for sure. My son and Daniel don’t get along very well. I pray every night that the situation between them will change,” Ruth said.

  “All good things in their own time,” Aron pronounced.

  “Though I wasn’t around him long, your ex-husband seems to have a very forceful personality.”

  “That he does,” Ruth agreed, nodding her head.

  “Daniel has always craved a lot of attention, whether it be as the life of the party, or flashing dollars or women. He has to be bigger than life.”

  “I think he still has feelings for you,” Aron observed casually.

  “Hmm, I don’t know about that. We’ve been divorced for a long time. I don’t think either one of us would be inclined to travel down that road again.” Ruth’s tone of voice was even, although her stomach was performing zigzags.

  “You do share a history, and you share children and grandchildren. Sometimes that’s a powerful incentive to try to get things right the second go-round.”

  “That’s true, but in our case, the bad times outweighed the good. I won’t portray myself as a victim. I did some things wrong that contributed to the end of our union. Still, I know we’re both in a better place. He moved on with his life, and he has the household to prove it,” Ruth stated with a tremor in her voice.

  “But from what you told me, his status has changed. And we learn, ‘sometimes the grass is not greener on the other side of the pasture.’ That’s the vibe I picked up from your ex-husband’s demeanor tonight. I hope I’m not speaking out of line here, Ruth. I’m just trying to gauge your feelings for your ex,” Aron confessed; then he sighed loudly.

  “All you had to do was ask, Aron,” she replied gently. “When Daniel left me, I was devastated, and it took me a long time to get over the loss of our marriage. Not to mention, he remarried before the ink was dry on our divorce decree. For many days, I felt like I’d lost my incentive to go on. There were times I didn’t think I had the strength to get through another day. I had to pray morning, noon, and night to maintain my sanity. Eventually the hurt went away, and I’m in a much better place than I was years ago.” Ruth ran her fingers through her hair and looked upward.

  “Great.” Aron’s face lit up like a hundred-watt bulb. “I like you, Ruth, and I’d like for us to spend more time together, getting to know each other. I’ve made mistakes in life, and I’ve learned from them, and I paid my debt to society. I’d like to enjoy the remainder of my years by watching my grandchildren grow, and sharing the companionship of a good woman.”

  “I know what you mean. I’ve been blessed. By and large, my family members are doing well. Alice is going through a crisis. God willing, though, she’ll be fine. I will have to get used to sharing her. I know that sounds selfish, but Alice and I have been there for each other since we were in elementary school. She’s my sister/ friend.”

  “There’s nothing wrong with sharing. Who knows? You may not be as available as you think.” Aron smiled.

  “Well, Mr. Reynolds,” Ruth said coyly, batting her eyes, “I do believe you’re flirting with me.”

  “That I am,” he replied smoothly. “I love your smile, and I want to see it on your face as much as possible. It’s like a burst of sunshine on a cloudy day.”

  “Oh, wow, now you’re trying to run a Temptation song lyric on me.” Ruth threw her head back and laughed.

  “I’ll do whatever it takes to see or hear you laugh,” Aron said in a tender voice.

  “Good,” Ruth proclaimed. She glanced at the doorway because she heard Queen’s petulant voice calling her from the bedroom. “I have to go. My mother is calling.” Then she giggled. “I sound like I’m a teenager, don’t I?”

  “You sound like the caring woman you are. P
leasant dreams, and I’ll see you tomorrow,” he said, conveying concern.

  “Have a good evening,” she responded.

  “I already have,” he said. There was a twinkle in his eyes.

  They hung up, and Ruth walked out of the den to the bedroom to tend to Queen. When she settled into bed, Ruth clasped her hands behind her head and pondered the day. What a day it had been: meeting Montgomery for the first time, and Daniel being back in the family fold. Her lips curved into a smile at the thought of how comfortable Aron was with her family. He earned a gold star in the column of positive traits. Ruth sighed; she hoped the church would be as understanding with her decision. Then her personal life would be complete. Ruth put the idea out of her mind. That bridge would be crossed on another day.

  Chapter Twenty-two

  Daniel stood in front of the ornate brass-framed mirror inside one of the spare bedrooms of his house, where Brian and Sarah had moved his possessions the week after Sarah had stayed with him. After the humiliation of Lenora’s leaving him had subsided, he refused to inhabit the room they had shared.

  His eyes critically roamed the upper part of his body, which he knew had become flabby after years of sitting and sleeping in the reclining chair, undergoing little physical activity. Daniel’s lips twisted sardonically to the side as he spied patches of gray hair sprouting from his head, as well as his upper lip. His eyes looked slightly blurry. I’m definitely not on top of my game, he thought. He flexed his sagging muscles, buttoned his pajama top, and walked over to the bed and sat down.

  He opened the nightstand drawer and pulled out the letter Lenora had left for him before her defection. Some of the writing was blurred from the tears he had shed while reading the letter, but the contents were seared permanently into his memory bank.

  Dan,

  There’s simply no other way to put this. I have been bored in the marriage since you had your heart attack. The man I loved went away when you stayed in the hospital recuperating, and he never returned. I miss the exciting man I fell in love with. Instead, I got stuck with a dreary old man, who doesn’t seem to have any direction or passion in his life. You will always occupy a special place in my heart for the beautiful children we have. One of the happiest days of my life was when Damon was born. Our wedding should be up there along with those fond memories, but all I can remember is barely finishing our vows and how you had to leave to see about that daughter of yours, who’s not even your daughter. But enough about the past, it’s the future I’m looking forward to.

  Dan, I didn’t plan to fall in love with Trevor. It sort of just happened, one of those things you can’t quite control, kind of like when you and I fell in love. I plan to file for divorce in Reno and marry Trevor. He makes me so happy. I’m not an old woman, so there’s no need for me to put my life on hold in hopes of trying to recapture what we once had. I know the boys are going to be upset. Please tell them that I love them, and that I will be back to see them as soon as I can. Trevor plays in a band, so we’re on the road frequently. He has gigs in Europe, so we’re going there in the fall until the beginning of next year. That’s not a life for young children, so it’s best they stay with you, at least until they’re older. Sometimes I think my attraction to you was the thrill of taking you from your wife. You were so adamant in the beginning of our relationship about how you were not going to ever leave Ruthie. I took that as an insult and a personal challenge. So, to that end, I accomplished what I wanted. The perfect minister’s daughter was brought to her feet. What I want, I generally get. You can call me selfish or self-centered or a witch, whatever you prefer. Being with Trevor is as close to perfection as life can get for me. Take care of the boys.

  Smooches,

  Nora

  Every time he read that letter—especially the smooches part—he had an overwhelming urge to smooch Lenora, and he wasn’t referring to a kiss. His fists and stomach clenched spasmodically. The letter was cold and calculating, much like Lenora was. He dropped the letter on the bed and bowed his head. He rubbed his forehead. He could hardly believe that Lenora had the audacity to think, much less pen something like that to him. He had been good to her and had treated her like a queen, but look at what it got him: three children whom he wasn’t sure that he had the energy to raise.

  He’d been silently berating himself for a long time over why he hadn’t stayed with Ruth. She kept a clean, beautiful house, although she spent way too much time at The Temple. Her doing so gave him a chance to roam the streets. Back in the day, Ruth had turned a blind eye to his comings and goings most of the time. His children were now grown; and other than Sarah, he didn’t have a good relationship with them. Daniel got into the bed, sat with his back against the headboard, and closed his eyes.

  He could see Ruth’s smile in his mind as she had been at Sarah’s house that evening. Her face was thinner, and her silver gray hair, which was styled into a short cut, was very becoming. Daniel could see that his ex-wife had lost weight. She looked good, and it had been a long time since he had been attracted emotionally and physically to her.

  Then he frowned as he remembered the old dude who came to Sarah’s house with his daughter and granddaughter. The man had the audacity to talk privately with Ruth like she was his woman or something. Daniel poked out his chest. He wasn’t having it; Ruth was his. He had been her only husband. She came to him as a virgin, and she had borne his children. That had to count for something, didn’t it?

  He exhaled loudly, as if his midsection was a balloon and the air was let out. Painful as it was to face, he knew that he had dogged Ruth. The Ruth he was married to bore little resemblance to the self-assured woman sitting at Sarah’s dining-room table. If Daniel was honest with himself, he would realize that he didn’t know Pastor Ruth Wilcox. He only knew Mrs. Daniel Wilcox, and he’d found her skills as a wife lacking, where it mattered most to a man.

  He admitted that although the other man seemed a little older, Aron was in better shape than he was, and that man still possessed good looks.

  Daniel’s expression hardened. It didn’t really matter, because in the long run, he knew Ruth, and she always believed that marriage vows were indeed until death. She also had a forgiving heart. He knew that if he humbled himself and came to her the correct way, more than likely she would return to him.

  “I’ve just got to get myself together and maybe, just maybe, my life will get back in sync,” Daniel spoke aloud. He reached over and put the letter back inside the nightstand drawer.

  As he closed the drawer, the edge of an envelope was sticking out. Daniel pulled open the drawer and pulled the letter out. It was a statement from the mortgage company stating the house was in the process of foreclosure. He shook his head sorrowfully, because he didn’t understand how Lenora could do this to him. The mortgage on the house was high, over $2,000 a month. There was no way Daniel would be able to save the house. He rebuked himself, because he couldn’t even provide for his children in the way to which they were accustomed.

  He had planned to try to get a lump-sum distribution the first year that his pension payment began, per Lenora’s urging. Sarah suggested her father opt for monthly payouts, so he could continue to live comfortably without his money running out. Daniel listened to Sarah. He realized had it not been for his daughter’s suggestion, there was no telling where he would be today, especially without Lenora’s income from her bookkeeping business.

  Life was changing fast, and Daniel felt uncomfortable with the sacrifices he was going to have to make. He felt too old to have to make life-altering adjustments. His children seemed so settled, and look at him. He thought about Naomi’s boyfriend and how he seemed to be swimming in dough, but he doubted if she would help him. She still harbored issues about his leaving Ruth for Lenora, and the lie that was perpetrated regarding her birth. So he was going to have to lean heavily on Sarah for support.

  He also assumed Ruth was in great shape financially. He knew she was the executor of Queen’s financial affairs, and
he was more than certain that Bishop would have left the women in his life well provided for after his death. The Temple was a huge church, not a mega-church, but large nonetheless. So on top of that, Ruth had to be pulling in close to six figures as the senior pastor. The apartment building she and Alice owned had to be worth half a million at least.

  Then Daniel smiled to himself, thinking, This old dog still knows some tricks. He planned to call Ruth the following day. Yes, his ex-wife was looking better and better, the more he thought about her.

  He rubbed his hands together and licked his lips. Daniel’s expression hardened. It didn’t matter to him one whit that the janitor might have designs on Ruth, or that he and Ruth were divorced. Ruth Wilcox was meant to be his wife again, and Daniel planned to do everything in his power to woo Ruth back.

  Chapter Twenty-three

  By midmorning on Monday, Ruth had returned Queen to the home. During the ride to the North Side, Queen had asked Ruth a couple of times where they were going, and she patiently explained to her mother that it was time for her to return to the home. Queen told Ruth she didn’t want to go back there, that she wanted to go back to the house that she shared with Bishop. She pleaded with Ruth to let her stay at her house, and she even shed a few tears. Ruth felt like a dagger had been thrust into her abdomen.

  Before the economy had tanked, the finance committee had been looking over a proposal to erect a senior citizen facility, one on a smaller scale than the one Queen resided in. But the project had been tabled until the economy recovered. Had the plan come to fruition, Ruth planned to move Queen Esther closer to home.

  Queen Esther refused to acknowledge Ruth’s presence when she told her good-bye and that she would return on Wednesday to visit her. Queen just sat on the rocking chair near the window, looking outside.

  Ruth’s mood was not the best when she stopped by the church. Even though it was her day off, she wanted to check her messages and perform a couple of chores. When she arrived in front of her closed office door, she found a clear crystal vase with a pink rose inside it, and a message taped to the side of the vase.