Mother May I (Knight Games Book 4)

by Genevieve Jack

  “Let’s just say I don’t want to march quietly into that good night. What are my other options?”

  Polina crossed her arms over her chest. “Exile? A good cloaking spell might keep you safe for a time.”

  The fire crackled as I contemplated where I’d go and how I’d say goodbye to the ones I loved.

  “You can’t seriously be considering this,” Julius said. We both turned to see him shaking his head. “It’s inconceivable. A woman like Grateful Knight does not run or hide.”

  “Really? Because I thought the hiding sounded like a good option.”

  He gripped the back of the red chair and smirked. “No, no, no. The answer, dear witches, is right in front of you. Hecate handed it to you on a silver platter.”

  “Out with it,” I said.

  “The only way to appease her is to do the very thing she thinks you wouldn’t dare to do—unite the elements.” He pointed one elegant finger in my direction. “You kill an earth, metal, and water witch and you’ll have enough power to not only break the bond between us as you promised, but to tell Mummy to take a hike.”

  A conspicuous silence fell across the room. My gaze darted to Polina. She’d drawn her wand and didn’t look happy. I couldn’t blame her. Julius had just suggested I kill her, and she understood my bond with Julius meant every vampire in this safe house was mine to command.

  Poe broke the tension with a long low whistle, and I found my voice.

  “I’m not killing anyone.” I held up one hand toward my half-sister. “Polina, I would never hurt you.” I met her gaze and lowered my chin. “You know I would never hurt you, right, Polina?”

  She hesitated for a moment. “I believe you, Grateful, but Tabetha started out as benevolent as you. Power changes people. It corrupts. I swear to the goddess if I get one hint you are changing or becoming like Tabetha, I will use Mother’s permission and kill you.” She pointed her wand at me.

  Julius appeared between us in a flash, hissing and flashing his fangs.

  “Relax, Julius,” I said. “Polina needs to take care of herself. I don’t blame her. And frankly, I’d rather die than end up like Tabetha.”

  Polina lowered her wand. “For now, I trust you, and I have no plans to kill you despite the permission.”

  “Good, because I have a plan.” My eyes darted between Poe, Julius, and Polina. “We do as Julius suggests and combine the elements—”

  “I thought you just said—”

  I shook my head. “Not by killing. By collaboration. We convince other witches to lend me their powers, just temporarily. Once I unite the elements, I’ll set things right and give them all back.”

  She narrowed her eyes at me. “Are you insane? No witch is going to trust you with her power because you promise you’ll give it back.” She snorted. “It’s laughable.”

  “I hold air and wood. Rick holds earth. If you agree to help me, I have metal. All we need is a water witch to cooperate. Just one. We should be able to convince one witch to help us.”

  “You think you can convince a water witch you’ve never met to join up and loan her power to you for no other reason than generosity?” Polina asked.

  “Exactly.”

  “That may be optimism at its finest,” Julius murmured. “Killing would be easier. And your presumption about Rick is positively ludicrous. Have you forgotten that he has no magic?”

  “It’s in him, somewhere. He just doesn’t remember. If he had it before, there must be a way for him to have it again.” I flashed a warning look at Julius. Polina didn’t need to hear about Rick’s shortcomings now, not when I was trying to convince her to join my cause.

  Polina traced her lips with her fingers. “Tabetha’s persigranate shouldn’t have affected his elemental power. Even if he doesn’t know how to use it, we should be able to leverage his magic.”

  I nodded my agreement. “And, worst-case scenario, if we can’t, we can find and convince an earth witch too.” I chewed my lip. One witch was a long shot. Two would be winning the lottery.

  Poe rolled his eyes. “Why not? I’m sure witches will be lining up to loan you their powers in order to make you invincible.”

  “Poe is right. No witch is going to help you do this, Grateful, unless you force her. It’s too risky,” Polina said.

  “What about you?” I asked, looking her in the eye. “Let’s get this out on the table. Will you help me, Polina?”

  She grimaced and took a deep breath. “I will, but…”

  “If I’ve convinced you, I can convince someone else.”

  “I have to help you. I was standing behind you in Hecate’s garden. What makes you think I won’t be the next on her hit list? I have to help you, but other witches won’t. Even if they feel for you, they’ll want to distance themselves.”

  “Maybe. Maybe not. We won’t know until we try.”

  Poe sighed. “It could work, if you can find willing witches to participate, don’t allow them to kill you first, and are able to complete the spell to unite the elements before the goddess or her hired thugs strike you down.”

  Damn, this was shaping up to be one hell of a tall order. I spread my hands. “Does anyone have a better idea?”

  Poe exchanged glances with Polina and Julius.

  “I don’t,” Polina said. “But even you must realize this is risky. If I were you, I’d have some hard conversations with the important people in my life.”

  “You mean Rick.”

  “He’s the one who will have to help bring you back if you get killed enacting this plan.”

  I bit my lip. She was right. At a minimum, I needed to prepare Rick for my demise and reincarnation.

  “My vampires can help,” Julius said. “Depending on the witch, I might even be able to compel her cooperation.”

  “Thank you.”

  “I’m not being generous. In exchange for my help, I expect you to break this bond you hold over me as soon as you are powerful enough to do so.”

  “Of course. I promised you I would. Are you sure you want to help me? It could mean your eternal life.”

  He looked at me and without a hint of smile said, “Woman, as long as I’m bound to you, I’m dead anyway.”

  Hildegard stretched and flapped her snowy wings. Polina’s magical familiar couldn’t speak human English like Poe, but her witch understood her as if she could.

  “Hildegard offers her support. She says she’ll persuade the witch’s familiar, should she have one, to help our cause,” Polina said.

  “How about you, Poe? Are you in?”

  Poe rolled his eyes. “Of course I am. Your existence is my existence.”

  Julius bowed slightly at the waist. “I am at your service.”

  Polina nodded solemnly. “I’m in.”

  “We can do this! And when it’s all over, Hecate will leave me alone because she’ll know I don’t want to be a goddess.”

  There was a light knock on the door. Julius glanced at me, then flashed across the room to open it. The maid who’d cleaned up the scone stood with her hands folded in front of her hips.

  “I am sorry to disturb you, but there is a problem with a patron downstairs, Master Julius.”

  “A problem?” Julius asked, turning his ear to the hall.

  “The man your guest brought with her”—she gestured toward me—“has started a brawl.”

  I pushed past Julius and rushed into the hall. “Oh no. Rick!”

  Chapter 14

  Fight! Fight! Fight!

  I sprinted into the bar just in time to see Rick’s fist connect with Gary’s face. Vampires are tough, but caretakers are tougher. A caretaker’s purpose is to balance the darkness in the world. He’s made to be as hard and fast as a vampire, as strong as a shifter, as enduring as a poltergeist. Even in his current state of disconnectedness, Rick was a formidable force.

  Gary hit the floor and slid across the waxed wood planks into the wall, parting the crowd of vampire patrons who smiled and swirled their drinks at the im
promptu entertainment. At super speed, Gary bounced to his toes and tackled Rick into the bar. The crowd cheered. More annoyed than injured, my caretaker brought an elbow down on Gary’s head, eliciting a yelp from the vamp and a groan from the audience.

  “Stop. Stop!” I yelled, drawing Nightshade.

  My blade glowed like a lightsaber and the bar plunged into silence. The band stopped playing. The bartender stopped serving drinks. A squirrelly vamp perched on a barstool dropped his drink and glass shattered near his feet. He didn’t stoop to pick it up. Every eye locked on Nightshade.

  I approached Rick, who still had Gary’s neck in a chokehold.

  “What is going on here?” I asked.

  Rick’s mouth twisted in disgust. “This… this… creature said he was previously intimate with you.”

  “I just mentioned we used to live together, Grateful,” Gary whined.

  I rolled my eyes. “Why would you do that, Gary? Does this seem like the time or the place?” I pulled Gary out of Rick’s grip by the collar and pushed him away.

  “You can’t be suggesting…” Rick looked at Gary in disgust.

  “I was trying to commiserate with the guy,” Gary pleaded with me, spreading his hands. “He’s down here drinking all night, blubbering on about how confusing you are. Now I’m the bad guy for agreeing with him?” Gary swatted the air between us. “Forgive me for caring.”

  Rick’s nostrils flared. “You are a liar. This woman would never touch you.” He swayed on his feet.

  I caught him by the chest. “Are you drunk?” I didn’t know Rick could get drunk. In as long as I’d known him, I’d never seen him like this.

  “He’s been drinking rum-laced blood all night. Anything would get drunk on that,” Gary said. “Even a caretaker.”

  “Hmm.” I slipped my arm around Rick’s waist. “Come upstairs with me and we’ll sort this all out.” He nodded, and we ambled toward the stairs. Out of the corner of my eye, I caught Gary following. “Not you, Gary.” The vampire threw up his hands and sat down at the nearest table.

  Julius, who had followed me into the bar, crossed the room to talk with the bartender, frowning slightly at my hold on Rick.

  I manipulated him up the stairs, into Julius’s room, and plunked him down next to the fire. Polina, Poe, and Hildegard slipped out the door without saying a word.

  “How do you know that vampire?” Rick slurred. I could smell the rum on his breath. Who knew rum-laced blood was even a thing?

  Taking the chair across from him, I sighed heavily. “I’m tempted to lie to you right now, but I don’t think that’s a good way to start or continue a relationship.”

  “Lie to me about what?” His head circled and his eyelids fluttered. He propped himself on his knees.

  “Gary wasn’t always a vampire. He used to be human, and before I met you, he used to be my boyfriend.”

  Rick’s lazy eyes widened and he slouched back in his chair looking thoroughly dejected.

  “I’m sorry, Rick. It’s not something I’m proud of. The thing is, I didn’t know.”

  He shook his head. “You didn’t know? You didn’t know you were dating Gary?”

  “No. Not that. I didn’t know there would be a you. If I’d known all I’d have to do is wait and my soulmate would come to me, I would have waited.”

  He grunted.

  “No, really. Someone can tell you the ocean is big, but until you stand on its shores, you can never fully appreciate how completely humbled you become in its presence. People told me about love, Rick. I thought I could create it if I worked hard enough, but I didn’t know. You can’t create what we have, not even with magic. It just is, and it’s humbling and it’s larger than life.”

  He leaned forward and placed a hand on my cheek. His gray eyes connected with mine, and I could see the love he had for me. Wasn’t that what this was all about with Gary? If he didn’t have feelings for me, he wouldn’t be jealous. His lips parted and my heart trembled.

  “I remember having that,” Rick said.

  I grinned like a kid at Christmas.

  “With Isabella.”

  My smile faded along with the swell of hope in my bosom.

  “Part of her is in you. I feel it. Even now, sitting across from you, I sense her under the surface. I don’t remember the rest. I wish I did. It would make this easier.”

  “I know.”

  “I believe you, about our history, but Grateful, last night…”

  “We moved too fast.”

  “No, not that,” he said, surprising me. “What happened to me, when I changed, it was excruciating. It felt wrong, forced. It was torture.” He stared at his hands, a slight tremor forming in the fingers. “I’m afraid of it happening again. I want to be what you need me to be, but I can’t do that again.” He shook his head, then shifted away from me, eyes drifting to the fire.

  A lump formed in my throat. It was devastating to see him like this, like the pain of shifting had broken him, and to know I was responsible. I cleared my throat. “I have a theory about what happened.” Actually, it was Julius’s theory, but given the night Rick was having, I kept that nugget of info to myself. “I think Tabetha’s spell wiped out more than your memory. I think you lost a piece of your power. Maybe a piece of our connection. I’m going to find out what’s missing and give it back to you.”

  “And then what?”

  “And then it shouldn’t hurt anymore when you shift.”

  He scrubbed his face with his palms. “Why is this so important to you?” he muttered under his breath.

  I crossed to him and placed my hand on his shoulder. Eventually, he lifted his face to mine. “It’s only important to me because I want you to be able to protect yourself. You’re immortal, but that doesn’t mean you can’t be captured, tortured, even torn apart. If something happens to me…”

  His eyelids drooped and his head wavered. He was falling asleep sitting up.

  “You’re tired,” I said.

  He opened his eyes a crack. “I suppose I am. Is this a common problem with too much drink?”

  “Very common. Come on.” I helped him from the chair to the bed and tucked him between the sheets. On a whim, I leaned over and kissed him on the forehead. “I love you, Rick,” I whispered. “No matter what. Whether or not you can shift.”

  He didn’t open his eyes.

  * * * * *

  Back downstairs, I pulled up a chair across from Polina, who sat alone in a dark corner with a glass of something pale yellow and bubbly. A heavyset black vampire onstage sang “I Put a Spell on You” by Nina Simone. Couples swayed on the dance floor, the night’s earlier fight forgotten for more romantic pursuits.

  “Mind if I join you?” I asked.

  She motioned her red head toward the chair next to her. “Julius said he needed to take care of some business before we embarked on our quest to find a water witch.”

  “Did you ask what kind of business?”

  She shook her head and lifted her glass. “Better if I don’t know. I’ve got a real problem trusting that guy, Grateful. I understand involving him is necessary, if we are to have any hope of keeping you alive, but”—she shivered—“he gives me the creeps.” Raising her glass, she took a deep swig.

  “What are you drinking?” I asked.

  “Champagne. 1926 Dom Perignon. The vampires don’t like it. Charged me six bucks.” She laughed.

  “That champagne is priceless.”

  “I know!”

  I raised my hand to call over the brunette waitress with the fangy overbite. “I’ll have what she’s having.”

  “You didn’t come down here to drink. What happened to your caretaker?”

  “Asleep. Too much laced blood.”

  “Probably a good idea he gets his rest. We need him at his best.”

  “That’s what I came down here to talk to you about. I need your help.”

  “Helping you unite the elements isn’t enough? You need something else?”

 
The waitress arrived with my drink, and I took a long swig. “I need to do a spell to find out what happened to Rick after I died in 1698. Julius thinks he didn’t just forget me. He thinks part of my caretaker spell was corrupted by Tabetha’s magic.”

  “Do you think he’s right?”

  “I’m starting to. When I tried to use my magic mirror with him—the one you made for me—it felt like something was missing. And then last night, when he shifted, it was excruciating for him, almost like he didn’t have enough magic to complete the transition. I had to use my power to help him. There’s something going on. This can’t all be due to his memory loss.”

  “Julius should send someone to get your grimoire. You could ask it to show you the day you executed the spell.”

  “I thought of that. The problem is that my grimoire can only show me my own experiences. I think what Rick lost happened after I was dead.”

  “That would be a very unusual spell. It’s more likely you completed the spell before you died, and then Rick triggered the magic posthumously. You might be able to see that.”

  “But I won’t know what I’m missing because I can’t see what I can’t see.”

  “True.”

  I finished my champagne and decided to go for broke. “I was wondering if you could use your crystal ball to show me what happened to Rick after I died.” I scraped my teeth over my lower lip. I didn’t even know if it was possible, but since the mirror Polina made me could see into the future, I thought it might be possible for her to see into the past.

  “Crystal ball won’t work. It’s round, you know, like a planet. It’s more of a logistical tool. You want to travel to another dimension, the ball is your tool.” She pointed at me.

  “I understand. I’ll find a way to get to my grimoire and hope for the best.”

  “I didn’t say I couldn’t do it, just that I wouldn’t use my crystal ball. A mirror is a much better tool for your purpose.”

  “Do you have one with you?”

  “A small one. Not big enough to see what you want, but I can make one.”

  “I don’t understand.”

  “I’ll show you. Come on, we’d better do this before Julius gets back.”