In my haste to reach class I arrived early and the only other person in the room, thankfully, was Lawrence. He had his head in his hands, elbows on the desk, and seemed to be silently muttering to himself. I walked quietly up to him, and placed my hand gently on his shoulder but was shocked when I felt him stiffen underneath me and shake my hand off as if he was disgusted to have me even touching him.
“Lawrence?” I questioned warily, but he just cringed at hearing my voice, then finally turned to face me. However, this time it was my turn to cringe.
Lawrence looked angry. But not just an “I’m pissed off” kind of angry.
No.
It was much worse than that. This was a broken, disappointed, and rejected “how could you” kind of angry, and from the looks of it, it seemed to be directed straight at me.
“You just don’t listen, do you?” he glared, his warm, ocean-blue eyes now transformed into a cold, icy blue that was considerably darker than the norm.
“You just . . . don’t . . . get,” he trailed off, sighing and shaking his head before holding it in his hands once again. I stood there with the hand that had been on his shoulder still hovering slightly, my eyes wide and my body stiff from the shock of his words as he continued speaking menacingly, his voice sounding low and hollow from his head being surrounded by his hands.
“We told you, the first day, Kate and I TOLD you what he was like, and you . . . you just. Don’t. Damn. Well. Listen.” He sneered at me, his voice sharp, cutting through me.
I stood there, blinking uncontrollably whilst his words swirled around in my head.
“Lawrence . . . I—I . . . it wasn’t even . . . I . . .” I stuttered. It was impossible to even think coherently so speech was definitely out of the question. He was right, I knew I should have listened to them both and just ignored Kane, but I honestly felt that I had witnessed a different side of him, and he said he didn’t compare me to his past girls.
He said I wasn’t like them
He said I was different.
He said I was better
He also kissed me.
Then he chucked me like I was nothing.
I wonder how many other girls he had used the same lines on, just to get them to drop their pants.
I wanted to say all of this to him, but for some strange reason there was something buried deep within me that also wanted to defend him, even after he’d worked me over. I wanted to yell and cry and scream that Kane isn’t what everyone thinks he is.
But how could I?
He just proved everyone right not an hour ago.
And now everyone was laughing and sneering behind my back. Hell, Kane was probably one of them, bragging how he had me hook, line, and sinker, before something else came along. This was apparently a copper-headed, gold hoop-wearing, trout-smelling bitch.
As if that wasn’t enough, Kate was probably just as mad as Lawrence was, and if I thought he was bad when he was angry, he had nothing on Kate.
Damn.
And so the tears started silently running again because all I wanted to do now was just get a ring from my mum telling me she had arrived back so I could catch the first available plane and get the hell out of there. Leave all this behind me and forget it even existed. Go back to my real home, call my real friends, flop down on my real bed, walk to the fish and chip shop and have some real food, and guzzle a ton of Red Bull. Go to college like I was supposed to, meet a decent guy who was nice, and friendly, and gentle, and caring, and much better looking than Kane.
Pshh . . . Who was I kidding? There was no one better looking than Kane. Perfection doesn’t do his looks justice. He was much more than perfect.
Lawrence’s eyes widened and he sighed. “Suranne, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you cry, I just,” he ducked his head and kept his eyes on the floor, “I thought you were different,” he muttered.
“Lawrence I don’t know what you think is going on between Kane and me but I can assure you I haven’t done anything with him.”
Apart from kiss him in the early hours of the morning. And fantasise about him constantly.
His head snapped up and he looked at me in shock.
“You haven’t had sex with him?”
In my mind? Definitely.
“Uhh, no,” I replied, shifting my eyes from side to side, hoping that my blush wouldn’t betray me and my nightly dreams.
He seemed to believe me and he sighed in relief. His mouth spread into a wide grin and he patted the chair next to him as the class began to slowly fill up with students. I sat down next to him appreciatively and smiled back. “I’m sorry about what I said,” he murmured, his blue eyes warm and shining again as they gazed into mine.
“It’s OK.” I smiled back at him and he raised his hand slowly, brushing the tears away from my cheeks softly with the pad of his thumb. His eyes flitted to my lips for a few seconds before the teacher came in, and he reluctantly pulled away from me.
The day followed on sluggishly for me after that. At the end of every lesson my chest tightened and my heart thudded in my chest from the thought of running into Kane in the halls.
I never did, and for that I was grateful.
I did, however, have Lawrence escort me to all of my classes and was glad that he was here for me. I could tell from all the stares and the sideways glances from other people that, unlike them, Lawrence didn’t judge me anymore. But unlike them, he knew I hadn’t had sex with Kane Richards. They didn’t.
The bell rang to signal the end of school and I breathed a sigh of relief as I was met at the door by Lawrence, his bright blue eyes gleaming and a wide grin that, if Kane hadn’t existed, would count as being extremely sexy. He slung his arm around my shoulder and we made our way into the parking lot. I had accepted a ride home with him at lunch in the hope that I wouldn’t run into Kane.
I was taking no chances.
“So, Suranne, uhh, I was wondering, if umm, maybe, I don’t know, I just guess I would like it if you came back to my place and we hung out for a while. Kate’s always with us and I think it would be pretty cool if it was you and me,” Lawrence stuttered as I leaned against the passenger door and he leaned over me, his arm resting on the roof of his car, next to my head.
“Uh, sure,” I said absently, my eyes flitting around the lot, subconsciously looking for Kane. If I could get him on his own maybe I could scream at him and possibly spit in his too-beautiful face.
Or maybe kiss him again? Wait, what? Where the hell did that come from?
“Hey,” I heard Lawrence murmur whilst his hand cupped my chin and pulled me to face him. “You still with me? Looked like you were miles away.”
My breathing sped up as his eyes darted to my lips, his breathing heavy and warm against my face as he leaned in closer.
“Suranne,” he whispered quietly and before I got the chance to respond, his lips came dangerously close to mine, desperate and wanting. His hand snaked into my hair and held my face to his.
“What the fuck is this?!” I heard a familiar voice next to us exclaim and Lawrence quickly pulled away.
I turned my head to the side slightly and smirked.
Hi, Kane.
15. REALIZATIONS
Kane
My fists clenched at my sides. No way in hell was Lawrence kissing her.
My girl. Whether she liked it or not.
Yeah, I felt guilty about earlier today, but shit. The fact that Suranne just stood there smirking at me didn’t help. And Lawrence, slightly breathless, looking at me like I was an idiot for interrupting him.
Too bad.
I grabbed Suranne’s arm and dragged her across the lot towards my car, ignoring her attempts to pull away from me, and ignoring Lawrence calling after us. Right now I really didn’t give a shit what either of them wanted. The ache in my chest had increased tenfold, and just watching them had boiled my blood. I can’t remember the last time I felt so angry over a girl. Well, maybe I can, but I’m not going there.
“Wha
t are you doing?!” she yelled at me as I tugged her roughly behind me, completely ignoring her. I couldn’t deal with this crap. As we approached the door to my car, I pulled her roughly and spun her around so that she was pressed up against the door. I didn’t let go of her hand, instead I grasped the other one as well so that both her hands were tightly in mine. I pushed up against her roughly.
“What the hell was all that about, huh?” My voice was low and cold while I tried to rein in my anger, and if I was completely honest, my jealousy as well. I cocked an eyebrow, waiting for her to speak, but she just continued staring into my eyes, her breathing becoming labored and heavy. I came undone when she bit her lip and all my blood rushed down to my groin.
Groaning quietly, I dropped my head.
“What’s wrong, Kane? Don’t you like someone messing around with you like you do with them? Bit hypocritical don’t you think?” she sneered at me, a slight vindictive smirk tugging at her lips.
“That’s completely different,” I spat sharply. “I wasn’t kissing the goddamn girl in front of you was I?!”
“You didn’t need to!” she snarled back at me, and I noticed her gray eyes flashing in anger and in . . . vulnerability? I wasn’t sure, but I knew that she was hiding something from me. Seeing as I was doing the same thing, I let it go.
“You don’t understand . . . I . . . can’t . . . right . . . now,”
I mumbled, dropping my gaze to the ground, half wanting her to hear me, and half not wanting her to. I heard her huff in exasperation, and snapped my head to look up at her.
“You’re bloody well right I don’t understand!” she yelled at me, her sexy-ass accent coming out thicker, and only making my hard-on worse. I could feel myself straining against my pants to the point where it was almost uncomfortable.
“And seeing as you’re obviously not going to explain it to me, you can let go and leave me to my own devices,” she continued, her eyes shining smugly, “including Lawrence.”
I could tell she was waiting for a reaction from me, and what d’you know, it worked. My eyes narrowed, my fists clenched around hers and two words burned in my thoughts.
You’re mine.
She smirked as she saw my anger, obviously happy that she got the reaction she wanted. Not caring, I pressed harder up against her, ducking my head so that I could whisper roughly into her ear.
“Is this what you want, Suranne, huh? Do you know what you do to me?” I groaned, and pushed my hips roughly into hers, getting a gasp and a low whimper in response. She dropped her head to my shoulder as her body became limp against mine and I thought about how much I affected her, a smug grin on my face.
After a couple of seconds of her heavy panting on my shoulder, her hot breath burning through the fabric to my skin, she regained some of her strength and tugged against my hands slightly, trying to get free. I held on tighter.
“Why can’t you just let me go?” she whimpered, and I could tell by the tone of her voice that she wasn’t just talking about my hands. I wished so badly that I could just tell her, but the more selfish part of my head was stronger than the confident part at the moment. So I stayed silent, squeezing my eyes shut, and wishing I could man up and get some courage. When I opened my eyes and finally focused on our surroundings I noticed that people had actually stopped midstep to stare at both of us, all wide-eyed and whispering. I could see all the chicks looked pretty angry, including the red-headed chick that I had walked away with earlier. As bad as I had felt about Suranne, I’d needed some release to get my stress levels down so I’d let her lead me off to the janitor’s closet.
But the whole time I was thinking about how Suranne’s face had twisted in pain when I had hooked my arm around the other chick. I just couldn’t erase the pictures from my head. And the burning ache in my chest only got worse as soon as she got down on her knees. After a while I just got pissed off, pushed her off me, and walked to class.
“People are looking Kane, please, just let me go,” Suranne pleaded, the last three words strained as her voice broke slightly, like she didn’t have the strength anymore.
No, Suranne, please just wait for me.
But my body let her go and she stumbled away from me, sniffling quietly and treading unsteadily back to Lawrence’s car as he glared daggers at me and put his arm possessively around her.
Whatever.
I spied the rest of the lot and noticed that all eyes seemed to follow Suranne’s movements until Lawrence’s car peeled out of the lot. Then their eyes snapped back to mine.
“Fuck off,” I muttered lowly as I got into my car and started the engine. The familiar growl permeated through the small space. I put the car in gear and screeched out of there as the eyes of the entire school burned into my mirrors before disappearing altogether.
I realized that for once, the guys weren’t cheering and murmuring about how I was the man. They were looking at me like I was crazy. Like I had somehow lost my touch, no longer desired by the entire female population.
At that moment, as I came back to focusing on the road in front of me, I knew that when I returned to school tomorrow, I was no longer going to be the Kane Richards. And if it meant that I would be able to get my girl in the process, then it meant that I really didn’t give a shit.
16. TEXT MESSAGES
Suranne
The car was silent apart from our breathing and the occasional sniffle from me. Lawrence fiddled with the radio for a while, but didn’t find a station that appealed to him, so he turned it off.
After a few more minutes of silence, he turned to me slightly. “Suranne, are you OK?” he asked softly, turning his head back to the road and then glancing at me quickly.
I nodded absently, my mind still thinking about how my whole jealousy payback thing had backfired. For some reason Kane always seemed to have the upper hand.
“So, what do you wanna do once we reach my place?” he asked lightly, trying to remove the dark cloud that had filled the space between us. Shaken out of my daze my head snapped up, my tone of voice instantly contrite.
“Oh crap, Lawrence, I’m so sorry but . . . would you mind just taking me home?” I pleaded softly.
He turned towards me, shocked, before concentrating back on the road. “But . . . you said─”
“I know Lawrence, but . . . please . . . I just really wanna go home.” Tears slowly started to gather at the corners of my eyes again.
“OK,” he sighed heavily, and took the next turn towards my aunt’s. I hung my head, now feeling guilty that I had been leading Lawrence on just because of Kane. It was cruel and he deserved someone so much better.
“I’m sorry,” I whispered softly, looking out the window, wiping the new tears that slid silently down my cheeks.
“Hey,” he murmured, lifting one hand and cupping my chin, turning it towards him so that he could look at my face.
“Don’t worry, Suranne, I’m not gonna push you. If you want me as a friend, then that’s who I’ll be,” he assured. But I could see the sadness and rejection shining in his blue eyes. Lawrence was amazing and the sane part of me wished that it was his blue eyes I thought about daily instead of warm chocolate-brown ones. Wished that there was some part of me that could feel attracted to him, even if it was only small, so that it could build up over time.
But there was nothing.
Nothing except brown eyes, and sweet-fragranced cologne, and the smooth velvet voice that made my ears sigh in contentment.
There was nothing but Kane.
And I hated it.
I gave him a weak smile of gratitude, turned my face to look out the window, and thought back to when Kane had me pushed up against his car. How my breath had hitched and my pulse had quickened when he whispered in my ear. How I felt a jolt of desire race through my veins every time he had pushed his hips into mine, and how the sound of his groan drove me wild. How his touch left a trail of tingling fire burning on my skin. How his sweet scent engulfed me and left my mind blank and reeling
.
He said I didn’t know what I did to him, but if it was anything like what he did to me then I definitely knew.
I knew too well.
Lawrence pulled me out of my reverie when he switched off the engine.
“Alright, we’re here,” he announced, keeping his hands firmly locked on the steering wheel. I bobbed my head and hummed as the air between us became awkward. Lawrence shifted in his seat nervously before he sighed and turned his shoulders towards me.
“Just . . . one time, Suranne,” he pleaded softly before abruptly shifting forward and gently pressing his lips to mine. He sighed into my mouth, cradling my face in his hands as my whole body stayed frozen. He broke the kiss only to give me smaller chaste ones against my lips and the edge of my mouth.
“OK,” he sighed, pulling away and putting his hands back on the steering wheel. “I’ll be OK now.” He nodded and I blinked stiffly at him, then stepped out of the car and walked into my house without a backward glance. My aunt greeted me from across the living room and I gave her a weak smile, walking past her and heading up the stairs. Once I reached my bedroom and flopped down on the bed, I closed my eyes and covered my face with my hands. Lawrence’s lips never gave me that jolt of electricity that Kane’s had. My lips still felt the same as they always did.
With a groan of frustration I rolled over, pressing my face into the pillow. I felt a vibration against my left thigh and jumped, pulling my phone out of my pocket.
One new text message from Kate.
Hey, heard Kane got to you aftr skl. U Ok? xKx
I sighed and pressed the reply button.
Yeah, im fine. Just feeling rly confsd — S
After a few seconds my phone buzzed again.
Kane Richards Must Die Page 6