Choose Wisely

by Michele V. Mitchell

  “Listen I don’t feel like talking right now,”

  I chuckled.

  “You don’t feel like talking? Well that’s not my problem. I deserve some sort of explanation, for your behavior,”

  “Explanation, I don’t owe you shit! If anything, you need to tell me. Why your hot ass was all up in some nigga’s face?”

  I stood there in shock. I had no clue what he was talking about.

  “You can’t be serious!” I shouted.

  He moved closer to me, pointing his finger in my face.

  “You need to lower your voice when you’re talking to me,”

  I smacked his finger out my face.

  “I don’t need to do nothing but stay black and die!” I yelled.

  “You know what? I’m sick of your smart ass mouth,”

  He grabbed both my wrist. I was squirming trying to break away from his grip.

  “Get your damn hands off me?”

  “Shut up!” He hollered.

  “You shut up! And get off me with ya crazy ass!”

  I guess he had finally had enough of my mouth. He released my wrist and struck me so hard across the face, that I fell backwards. I crawled to the nearest corner and balled up and cried.

  “You see what you made me do! Why couldn’t you just be quiet? I need to get some air,”

  I lifted my head and watched him disappear out the door. I quickly stood, running to the bathroom. I observed my face in the mirror. My cheek was red and swollen, and when I spit in the sink. I saw blood. I rinsed my mouth out with warm salt water. I checked my teeth and noticed my one bottom tooth was loose. I had never been hit by a man before. I wasn’t sure what to do. I decided to continue on with my day. I took my shower, ironed my clothes and was about to fix me something to eat when I heard a knock at the door.

  “Who is it?” I yelled.

  It was Tyrone holding red roses in his one hand. I cautiously, opened the door and let him. He tried to touch my face. But I avoided him by stepping back. I turned to head into the kitchen and he grabbed from behind. I could feel my body trembling, and I couldn’t seem to make it stop.

  “Baby I’m so sorry. I was angry. Seeing you hugging another man, and the way you spoke to me earlier had me vexed. I promise this will never happen again. Please believe me,” he begged.

  ‘That’s why he was so upset. He saw me hug Scooter earlier.’ I thought.

  I removed his hands from my waist. I turned to face him.

  “I love you. You don’t have to worry about another man because there is none. But you do need to learn to keep your hands to yourself,”

  “I promise Melissa it will never happen again. Do you believe me?”

  I could see the remorse in his eyes. I took both his hands and closed my eyes. Our lips touched gently. I whispered in his ear.

  “I believe you.”

  Sandy

  I stood pressing my finger on Shay’s mom’s doorbell. I waited almost five minutes and was about to leave, when Jason finally came to the door.

  “How are you?” I asked.

  “I’m doing okay. Come in,” I took a seat waiting to hear what he had to say.

  “Do you want anything to drink?”

  “No I’m fine,” I really wanted him to tell me what was up.

  I still had to see my father and go home to get dressed. He sat beside me, taking a swig of soda from the glass, sitting on the coaster in front of us.

  “So what happened?” I asked.

  “It was my boy Tank’s birthday. He said he had never been to Hollywood Casino. So we decided to take him,”

  Hollywood was where a lot of Harrisburg’s ballers would hang out. It was located outside of the city. And it was a benefit not having to drive three hours to Atlantic City. I listened as he continued with his story.

  “Everything was going good. I had hit playing Blackjack and I had met a woman. Around four o’clock my boys’ headed back to the city. I went to the Comfort Suites; where girly told me she had a room. I get there we start getting busy. Next thing I know someone hits me over the head with something,”

  “Wait a minute so there was more than just you two in the room?”

  “There had to be. I guess they were hiding in the bathroom or closet. I don’t know. I didn’t realize there was anyone else until it was too late,”

  “So they robbed you?”

  He looked at me like it was a crazy question. It probably was. But I had to ask. I needed all the facts.

  “Yes they robbed me. I woke up butterball naked. They even took my diamond stud out my ear. I had to call Shay to bring me some clothes,”

  “Speaking of Shay, where is she?”

  “She said she was going to the mall. I’m not really sure. You know I only told you this because my sister begged me to. It’s over I just want to move on,”

  I took his hand and squeezed it.

  “I know you want to forget about it. But whoever hurt you needs to brought to justice. I’m glad you came forward. I told Shay it’s not much I can do. But I will pass the information on, so the proper authorities can handle it,”

  I stood and he escorted me to the door.

  “Thanks for stopping by, and congratulations on your big day,” he smiled.

  I turned giving him a huge hug.

  Thank you Jason, you take care of yourself okay.”

  I hopped in my car and rode to my father’s house. He was my last stop, before going home to get ready. I parked my car, waving to Mrs. Bailey who lived three doors down from my father.

  “How have you been Sandy?”

  “I’m great Mrs. Bailey I can’t complain,”

  “That’s wonderful dear. Your father told me about your graduation today. He is so proud of you,” she stated while sweeping her porch. Hearing her words made me happy. All I wanted to do was make my father proud. I opened his front door peeked inside.

  “Hey daddy!”

  “Girl get your behind in here and close my door! You’re letting my heat out,”

  I laughed as entered.

  “Calm down daddy. You’re goin to lose your voice one day, with that hollering,”

  I plopped down next to him, giving him a big hug and kiss.

  “How’s my guy?”

  “I’m fine. How are you? Are you excited about today?”

  “Words can’t explain how I feel,”

  I leaned my head back and closed my eyes. I had been up since this morning, sitting down might have been a bad idea. My father tapped my knee and said he would be right back. He went upstairs and came back down, with a small white box in his hand.

  “Daddy what’s that?” He sat beside me, handing me the box.

  “This is for you,”

  I opened the box and pulled out a gold chain with a locket. I opened the locket and saw a woman holding a baby. Before I could say anything my father spoke;

  “This necklace belonged to your mother. I was going through my photo album and found that picture of you and your mother. We had just brought you home from the hospital. I know why you wanted to become an officer and I’m here to tell you. Your mother would be just as proud of you as I am,” he said as he wiped away my tears.

  “Don’t cry baby girl, this is a happy occasion,”

  “I know daddy. These are tears of joy,”

  I put on my necklace and stared at the beautiful woman in the picture. Even though she wasn’t here physically, she would always live on through me.

  I excused myself and went to the bathroom. I wanted to wash my face. My eyes were red from crying. I threw some cold water on my face and dried it with a hand towel. My father was sitting at the kitchen table when I approached him.

  “Daddy I’m going to head out,”

  “I want to talk to you about one more thing, how much time do you have?”

  I looked at the clock on the wall. I still had about two hours to kill. I pulled out a chair and took a seat. I was actually curious about what he had to say;

 
“You know I had a talk with Dontae. I know you care about him. But I think you two getting married isn’t a good idea,” he stated frankly.

  I loved my father and his opinion meant the world to me. But when it came to Dontae I didn’t care what anyone had to say.

  “Daddy I respect your feelings, but I’m grown and I’m going to do what feels right to me,”

  “What about the other women?”

  “I know he cheated in the past but it takes two,”

  My father wasn’t trying to hear what I had to say. All he knew was Dontae had hurt me and he wasn’t feeling him.

  “Daddy I know Melissa told you the reason Dontae and I had broken up was because he cheated. That wasn’t the entire story. I didn’t break up with him. He broke up with me; I was the one who cheated. So you see everything doesn’t fall on him,” I never wanted to tell my father the truth but it was time he knew I wasn’t an angel.

  We sat in silence for a moment.

  “Are you okay daddy?”

  “I’m fine,”

  “Please don’t be mad at me,”

  My father still thought at least one of his daughter’s was a virgin. If I would have told him my first time was with someone I barely knew, and I was drunk. He probably would’ve had a heart attack right there at the kitchen table.

  I reached across the table and took his hand.

  “Dontae and I have both made mistakes. We have hurt each other in the past. But we’re both ready to put those days behind us and start over. All I’m asking for is your support. Please support me on this!” I pleaded.

  “I will always support whatever you do even if I don’t agree,” he stated leaning over the table, squeezing my hand.

  “Daddy I’ve got to get home. I’ll see in a few. I love you!”

  “I love you too baby girl,”

  I left my father’s house knowing, I had is support no matter what. I was truly blessed. God was working overtime in my life.

  Dontae

  There I was sitting on my couch waiting for Lexi. She sent me several texts last night saying she needed to talk to me. She even sent a picture of herself completely naked. I was glad Sandy was sleeping when the texts came through because that argument would have been ten times worse than the one we had this morning.

  I was trying to keep things cordial between us. Now I was going to have to put my foot down. If she didn’t stop her nonsense, I was going to cut all ties with her including her job at the club. I looked at my watch. I was getting impatient. I had about an hour to get ready for the graduation. She needed to hurry up.

  Finally my doorbell rang. I went to the door to find Lexi standing on my porch smiling at me. I had to admit she looked fine. I invited her in and helped her take off her coat. She was wearing a red fitted Hollister t-shirt, skinny jeans, and a pair of red stilettos. She grinned when she saw me staring.

  “You like what you see?” She asked seductively.

  I ignored her question. Instead I offered her a seat on the couch.

  “You said, you had something important to tell me. What is it?”

  “I do but what’s the rush? Can I at least get something to drink?”

  “I’ll be right back,” I sighed.

  I went to the kitchen, grabbing two bottled waters out of the refrigerator. I handed her one and sat in my leather recliner across from her. I wanted her to tell me what was going on.

  “Do you mind if I use the bathroom?” She asked.

  “No go ahead,”

  I tried not to watch as she sashayed into the bathroom. But it was something about her that I was drawn too. Lexi returned to the living room with a serious expression on her face.

  “So are you ready to talk?” I asked.

  She came over to me with tears in her eyes.

  “What’s wrong?”

  “Dontae I’m pregnant!”

  I heard what she said, but it felt like my world had suddenly stopped. I didn’t know what to say or think. Suddenly I blurted out the first thing that came to mind.

  “Is it mine?”

  I must’ve pissed her off with that question because the next thing I knew she was throwing water in my face, from the bottled I gave her earlier. I wiped the water out my eyes and tried to calm her down. By this point she was crying and yelling hysterically. I held both her wrist so she could stop throwing blows to my chest.

  “Of course the baby is yours!”

  ‘I’m sorry. I didn’t mean any harm by asking. But I had to know,” I let go of her wrist and wiped the tears from her eyes.

  “You believe me? Don’t you?”

  “Yes I do,” I placed my hand in hers and lead her to the couch.

  I knew she said she had something important to tell me. I never expected this.

  “So what are we going to do?”

  “I’m going to take care of my child,” I confirmed.

  “What about me? I don’t want to raise another child without being a family,”

  “You know I’m with Sandy,”

  She jumped up and stood in front of me.

  “I don’t give a damn about Sandy! She’s not the one carrying your child. She ain’t giving it to you like a woman should. We can be a family. I love you Dontae I can make you happy,”

  I sat hypnotized as she started stripping her clothes off right in front of me. By the time she was done, she only had on her black panties and red stilettos.

  “Papi I’m having your baby. All this belongs to you. Don’t you want it?” She stated turning around so I could see all she had to offer.

  At that moment I was filled with emotion. She was carrying my baby, and she was looking fine as hell. Without another thought, I picked her up, kissing her luscious lips all the way to my bedroom. I threw her on my king size bed. If this was what she wanted. I was going to give it to her. I couldn’t deny how she made me feel. She satisfied me in ways no women ever had. Her sex was like air, and I needed it to breathe.

  I laid still as she maneuvered her body on top of mine. The feeling she gave me made me weak in the knees. She tossed her hair back and started exploring my body with her tongue. When she reached my right ear she whispered; “I love you!”

  Those three words brought me back to reality. I didn’t love her. The woman I loved was going to be graduating soon. I needed to be there with her. I pushed Lexi off me. I didn’t want to hurt her. But I had to be true to myself. I was in love with Sandy and no woman could ever take her place.

  “I’m sorry Lexi. I can’t do this. I will be there for you and the baby. But this right here, I can’t do,”

  She snatched the sheet, covering her naked body. I felt awful, but I had to tell her the truth. I didn’t love her. I could never love her. My heart never belonged to me. It always belonged to Sandy.

  “So you’re not trying to be with me?” She questioned.

  “I’m…….” Before I could utter another word she was stomping out the door.

  “Fuck you Dontae! I don’t need you and this baby ain’t yours anyway! You ain’t nothing but a clown! You will regret the day you ever met me!”

  Once I heard the front door slam, I got up to get ready.

  I stepped out the shower feeling guilty. I had let my urges get the best of me. I almost slept with a woman I knew my girl couldn’t stand. To make matters worse there was a chance she was pregnant. I heard her say the baby wasn’t mine. But she was angry. She would have said anything to hurt me. My mind was racing. I had to get a grip. This was Sandy’s day and I wasn’t going to spoil it.

  I was dressed and almost ready to go. I picked up my wallet and put it inside my pocket. I was about to check myself out in the mirror when I heard a noise downstairs. I grabbed my bat, and crept down steps. I scanned my living room there was no one there. I looked at my front door and it was locked.

  I was going crazy. I left the bat on the bottom step, heading to the kitchen. I looked around and everything was still in place. I turned to walk out and was caught off guard. The pictu
re above my fireplace had been moved. The safe behind the picture had been opened.

  I raced to the safe, realizing it had been emptied. I turned to see her facing me with hurt and anger in her eyes. I tried to say, I was sorry but it was too late. Without warning she swung my bat I had placed on the bottom step earlier, striking me as hard as she could.

  With that one blow, she released all the pain and humiliation she had suffered by me. I felt my head hitting the wood floor. This was serious. I tried to speak but nothing would come out. I watched as she walked out the door. She left me there to die alone. And how could I blame her?

  Sandy

  I sat looking at the huge crowd in front of me. Everyone who meant the world to me was there except one. My graduation was almost over and there were no signs of him. My emotions were all over the place. One minute I was happy with what I’d accomplished. The next I was pissed because he wasn’t there. He knew how much this day meant to me.

  ‘What if something happened to him?’ I thought. There I was only thinking of myself and he could be dead in a ditch somewhere. I had to get my emotions in check. The ceremony was almost over and I honestly had no idea what was said in the last hour. It was time to receive our awards and be sworn in. I listened carefully as my fellow cadet’s names were called. When I finally heard my name, a rush went through my body.

  “This next cadet will receive her certificate of completion, and the award for being the most inspirational cadet. Sandy Price,”

  I walked across the stage fighting my tears. I shook my captain’s hand and held my certificate close to my heart. This was a moment I would never forget. I smiled as the photographer took a picture of me and my captain. It was the only sincere smile I had all night.

  After my graduation I took pictures with close family and friends. I searched the room hoping to find Dontae. As I looked around I bumped into my captain.

  “Are you okay cadet?

  “I’m fine sir. I was just looking for someone,”

  “You don’t seem okay. I thought you would be more excited. Look around at all these happy faces,” he said while pointing at the other cadet’s smiling and laughing.

  “I’m fine sir really. I just have a lot on my mind,”