by Casey Herzog
Suddenly, the crowd milling about eating the catered food hushed. They all turned their attention towards the floating projection of the Elders in the corner of the room.
“Markham Reynolds has been accused of and judged to be practicing magic. Let his swift punishment be a message to all those who oppose us. You know that magic is forbidden. We take no delight in doing this, but a harsher sentence is often necessary to remind those thinking about doing the same thing of the consequences of these actions.
There have always been three chances. You use magic, and you go to the asylum to learn the error of your ways. Do it again and you’re sent back to the asylum for a refresher course. This usually works, but rare cases like these ones demand to be made an example of.”
Elder Masters took center stage and proceeded to cut off Reynolds’ head with a very sharp sword. There was a collective gasp throughout the room, but there was no way anybody was going to pull their eyes away from this spectacle. Markham was smiling the whole time. Reynolds was one of four to be executed for the crime of using magic.
I’d always been someone who believed in what I could see with my own eyes. I had a scientific mind. Living with the knowledge magic was real was hard for me. However, magic was forbidden and anybody practicing would clearly be punished with death.
I sat there appalled, and, when his head was severed from his body, I felt something like electrical tingles up and down my spine. I shivered like somebody had opened a window on this chilly February morning.
I could hear the whispers. It wasn’t long before there was a heated debate between the Elders’ loyal followers and those who didn’t exactly agree with what had happened. Someone pressed the button on the wall, and the screen vanished. The last thing I saw was the Elders standing over the body of the accused in accordance with the law.
Dressed in a black dress that went all the way up to my neck, all of my femininity was covered. Julian had his arm around me and I leaned my head against his chest, trying to block out everybody else attempting to be so sweet to me.
“The last time I saw anything like that I was five years old. I remember that day like it was yesterday. My father made me sit there and watch, telling me it was a lesson I had to learn. He sat there and watched with a stoic expression, almost like he was angry, but afraid to show that kind of outburst of emotion in front of someone that impressionable. He tried to shelter me from it, but there was no shortage of people who were willing to share, whether I wanted to see it or not.
“I still wake up in a cold sweat from nightmares that plague me. I don’t have them as much anymore, but I get this feeling they’re going to come back even stronger than ever now.”
“Have you given any thought to whether or not they are going to allow you to continue to go to school? They might find it necessary to home school you, but I would make a case for returning to school. You do have an above genius IQ.”
While Julian may have thought that, the decision was out of my hands.
I saw a man with gray hair looking my way. He excused himself from the conversation he was having and came and stood over me. I knew exactly who he was. Anderson Coleman used to come to dinner every Sunday night, but then, two years ago, he stopped coming altogether. I thought there was bad blood between him and my father, but I didn’t see any anger or resentment from either one of them.
“Gillian, your father was a good man, but not many people understood him the way I did. I had a unique insight into him and he would want me to share that with you. You have a lot to deal with, but I feel this can’t wait. I need to speak to you in private.”
“Whatever you have to say to me can be said in front of Julian. He’s my best friend and I don’t think that I could’ve gotten through this without him. The last few days have been a whirlwind of emotions and I sometimes find myself unable to breathe. Mr. Coleman, I appreciate your sense of urgency, but I think this can wait.”
It was the worst thing I could have said to him. He grabbed me by the wrist and pulled me from my sitting position with a look of fuming determination in his eyes.
“I’ve tried my best to be cordial to you, little girl, but you’re trying my patience.” He raised his voice, but it wasn’t enough to make anyone come to my rescue other than Julian who immediately stood between us. “This is important. There’s another side of your father that you have no idea about. I have waited the last few days, but his wishes were very clear.”
Mr. Coleman now had my attention, but I didn’t like the way he had manhandled me. My green eyes were shining with anger and my shoulder-length blond hair was disheveled from his touch. Nonetheless, there was a curiosity I couldn’t shake.
“I see this is important to you, so I will forgive you for touching me inappropriately. Wait until everyone leaves, and then you can say what is on your mind. If you can’t wait, then you know where the door is.” This was the first time I had ever stood up to anyone, and it felt good. It felt empowering, like I was freeing myself from the shackles of being an introvert.
Mr. Coleman didn’t look very happy, and he walked away in a huff. I heard the slam of the door and saw the brief image of his overcoat flapping behind him as he exited the room.
“I don’t know what that was about, but I wouldn’t trust him as far as I could throw him. If you want me to stick around after everyone leaves, all you have to do is ask.”
“I think everyone’s a little tightly wound today. I will speak to him, but only because he and my father used to be good friends. I don’t know what happened to sour their relationship, but I need to at least hear him out. You can call it a morbid curiosity, but I feel it’s my duty as his daughter to have an open mind.”
“The best thing for you is to get out of here as soon as possible. This place has always felt like a mausoleum. I stayed here one night and I thought for sure that the shadows along the walls were going to come to life. It was just a child’s overactive imagination running wild, but at the time, it felt like they were stalking me from across the room.
“I didn’t know you felt this way, Julian. What did you do to get through the night?”
“I threw the sheet over my head and kept it that way the rest of the night until I woke up to find the sheets lying on the floor. I never said this, but I thought that you were playing some sort of practical joke on me.”
Julian had never said anything about this to me in all the time we had been friends.
“I don’t know, this place is strangely comforting. I know my father was a good man and that he provided for me, but he could be very cold. We pretty much left each other alone.
“It sounds like you had things left unsaid.”
“I know I have no right to think this, but there were times I looked into his eyes and believed he didn’t even want me around. That he would’ve been better off without me being born. Those who knew him well said that he lost a piece of himself when my mother died.”
Julian was being kind, and having him play defense was helping me to control my inclination to scream bloody murder. I picked at the food, eating what had been brought and finding myself not being very hungry. I was taking Julian’s advice. It did make me feel a little better to immerse myself into the many different dishes that were lined across the kitchen table.
I had one of the finger sandwiches with a salmon mousse up to my mouth when I spied that same green light coming from the study, almost imperceptibly. It was blinking in such a way that it compelled me to go towards it. I didn’t get the chance. Julian led me away from the study, but I kept looking over my shoulder wondering if there was something I was missing.
I was standing by the window, lost in my own thoughts, when someone caught my attention outside. William was that type of guy who had a mysterious aura. He was a man of few words and his brooding had made him a sought after commodity by the older girls in school. I knew I didn’t stand a chance, but that didn’t stop me from fantasizing about the possibility.
He had on a nondescrip
t pair of black pants and a black sweater. I had seen the hint of a tattoo on his neck, and I wasn’t the only one. The girls talked about it all the time in the bathroom, but nobody knew what it was. They gravitated towards him, hoping to be the first to find out. I thought it was an animal with its tail touching the nape of his neck, but how would I ever learn what it really was?.
He was walking alone when he suddenly looked in my direction. There was a brief moment of clarity; time stood still. I thought for sure we were in our own little world.
I wanted to rush into his arms and hear his encouraging words to get me through this. I could’ve easily flung the door open to run down the sidewalk in an effort to show him what he was missing. I was a little young and naïve, but that didn’t mean I couldn’t be a hot-blooded woman. I had heard rumors about girls who had had their chances with him, but there was nothing to substantiate any of their claims. Those who claimed to have been with him physically could never give a description of that tattoo. They told tales of passion ignited by the sheer joy of being with one another. Obviously they hadn’t gotten anywhere.
William would never be a part of my world, just a fantasy haunting my daydreams. It was strange that he appeared under my window today of all days.
The rest of the wake was a somber experience that made me remember vividly what I was not going to have in my life anymore. Although it hadn’t seemed like a big loss because my father was never one to show me affection, the stories told of his youth made him sound like an entirely different person. That was the man that I had always wanted to meet; unfortunately, I never had the chance. That opportunity was pulled from my reach with the death of my mother.
Chapter Three
The only person remaining was Julian. He was helping to tidy up and basically, being the only person I could depend on. I was numb, not feeling anything, and just wanting to get on with the rest of my life. It seemed so selfish to wonder about my future, but I had made my case with the Elders and they agreed I should stay on for one more semester of high school. They also conceded and decided I could stay in the house for one month. I tried to convince them that it was my home, but they reminded me that I was not exempt from the law.
There was no laughter in the streets. They were barren. It was foolish to go against curfew and those who enforced the curfew took a dim view of anyone who violated what they saw as the natural order of things.
“It looks like I’m going to have to stay the night. I don’t know about you, but I’m exhausted. I’ll go upstairs and make up the guest room,” Julian said as he was looking out the window.
“I don’t even know why these ‘people’ call themselves my father’s friends.”
“Those people were so fake! They only came here because they felt some sort of misplaced loyalty to your father. They wanted to make a good first impression with you, so I would be very careful about their offers of friendship. I hate to be cynical, but I’ve learned the hard way that not everybody is altruistic.”
“I’m just going to sit here and think for a bit. It’s hard to believe my father is not going to walk through those doors.
“It wasn’t right that I had to bury him that way! They only found bits and pieces that could confirm his DNA. I couldn’t even have an open casket!
“The only light in all the darkness was that burying him next to my mother was like reuniting them in death.”
I had heard of black magic that could bring back the dead, but what came back would not be the person that you remembered. They would be a mere shell of what they once were. This was one of the reasons the Elders had forbidden the use of magic.
He put out his hand and tried to touch my cheek. I turned away to stop him from initiating any kind of passion between us. I’d always thought Julian had a crush on me, but I tried to refrain from giving him any opportunity to think there could be something between us.
“I know this has been a trying time and I hope that having me here has given you a shoulder to lean on. I will always be your friend and I hope you never forget that. This tragedy could have been avoided.”
I felt the same way. Had my father been home where he belonged, then the explosion wouldn’t have taken his life.
“I will always need you in my life, but not in the way that you want me to be. I wish I felt that way, but I don’t, and you deserve so much more than unrequited love.
“Don’t waste your time on me because I can’t give you what you want. I would only be fooling myself if I tried and that’s not fair to either of us.”
I heard the clock ticking. It was a deafening sound that made me want to cover my ears.
“I haven’t even begun to fight for you. You can say whatever you want, but that doesn’t mean I’m going to give up on you. There is something here between us and it doesn’t matter how much you fight it.
“I was the only person your father allowed to get close to you, and he told me he thought we made a good pair. I feel it’s my duty to take care of you in your time of need.”
He had his hands on my shoulders, and I should’ve released him from the burden of taking care of me, but it felt nice to have somebody in my corner, and I wasn’t ready to excise him from my life.
“I know exactly how my father felt about you. He never let me forget it. If it had been up to him, we would have been married and having his grandchildren already, but I’m too young to settle down.
“I have a lot more I want to accomplish in my life before even considering any of that. You can go ahead and pine for me all you want, but it’s not going to change anything. You’re very dear to my heart and our friendship means more to me than you can ever know, but friendship is where it stops.”
He nodded his head and then went upstairs to leave me alone.
Suddenly, I heard a noise and saw movement in the study that shouldn’t have been there. I went to the door and saw Mr. Coleman searching in a mad panic to find something. The door was ajar and I could hear his voice as plain as day.
“Where did you hide it? You can’t possibly expect to keep it hidden forever. It’s here and I know it. I will not allow Gillian to have what is rightfully mine.
“I will turn this office upside down. Don’t think that I won’t do it. You’re a bastard for keeping it to yourself because it belongs to both of us. I’m sorry you think I can’t handle the power, but you’re not around to send the guardians to police my actions.”
I stepped into the room while his back was still to me.
There was no rhyme or reason to my father’s organizational skills. I often heard my father saying he knew where exactly everything was, and that was all that mattered. He had his own way of thinking.
Dysfunctional was not a strong enough word for our relationship.
“Is there something that I can help you with?” I said.
He almost jumped out of his skin. Then, he turned to face me with the same menacing glare that had made me feel like I was in danger.
“I’m sure that if you describe it I could help you.”
The flush along his neck and the way his eyes shone with mischief made me believe that being in this study was not a good idea. This man had ulterior motives, and I had just about had all I was going to take. I had no patience left.
“I’m just looking for something your father would have given me anyway. I don’t see it here, and it baffles me in a way that has me scratching my head.
“Anything of worth to him was where he could get his hands on it. Why do you think that he insisted you live underneath this roof until you were 18? He felt that there was little chance of you doing something you would regret under his watchful eye.
“You may not believe it, but he loved you in his own way. He confessed to me in private that everything he did was for you.”
I still didn’t trust Mr. Coleman. He was two-faced and would say anything to get his hands on whatever it was he was looking for.
“My father only loved his books; I was merely a second thought. I don’t
really think you knew him as well as you think you did. He was a hard man to get to know.
“He worked in the research department because he knew that he would be left alone. It was a mind-numbing and tedious thing to do, but he loved it nonetheless. Retiring from teaching, not by his own choice, was like somebody stabbed him with a knife in his back, but he found happiness in the pages of these books. He tried to share his passion with me.”
I wanted him to leave, but it didn’t look like he was going to go unless I said something to force the issue. I was not opposed to raising eyebrows.
“This whole thing could have been avoided.”
That was the second time someone had said that to me, verbatim. It was like they were trying to tell me something, and I was curious to know what it was.
“It has been a long day, Mr. Coleman, and I would appreciate if you left the same way you came. I would hope you would do me the courtesy of letting me mourn for my father in peace.
“Grief comes in stages, and I’m still in the denial stage. I know they say that time heals all wounds, but I’m not sure I believe it. I give you permission to come back another time and look for what you were searching for, but only if I’m here to supervise.”
He raised his two fists, and I thought, for a moment, we were going to have a problem. His knuckles were white from how hard he was digging his nails into his palms. I could even see a trickle of blood.
“I appreciate your need to have space, but I’m not done with this by a long shot. He owes me and I’m damn well going to collect one way or the other. I’ll be back, Mr. Coleman said, with his eyes burning into me in an accusing way.
“That might sound like a threat, but it’s more of a promise. It’s very important that I receive what he left me. We had an agreement as gentlemen and I’m going to make him live up to his end of the bargain.