Divine Desire: A Lotus House Novel: Book Three

by Audrey Carlan

Atlas’s head jerked back. “No, wherever would you get that idea?”

  I balked. “You! You said he did drugs, and when he left, he was high.”

  “Medicinally, and yeah, he liked to be high, but no, he didn’t sell it. He never seemed that far gone.”

  “Then where did all this money come from?” I picked up a stack and ran my finger across all the hundreds.

  Atlas looked at all the cash, grabbed it, and tossed it back into the box. He didn’t even care enough to stack it up nicely again. “This? This is bribe money. It’s money he made over the years from all his art selling in shows, at auctions, and galleries.”

  “You’re kidding.”

  He shook his head and shuffled the papers. “Said he owed it to me. That he hoped that the cash and the other things he’d signed over into my name would make up for leaving me behind.”

  I knew my man. Material things were not the way to his heart. “And does it?” I asked.

  “Fuck no. He can keep his money and shove it up his ass. You know where he is?” He sneered in a way that told me he now knew exactly where his father was located.

  “Where?” I was almost afraid of the answer.

  “Hawaii. Living on the beach attached to a successful gallery on North Shore Oahu.” He choked out a wry laugh. “And you know what? It has been my mother’s dream her entire life to live on the beach. Carefree and doing something she loved. And while she worked her ass to the bone cleaning up other people’s shit, making their homes sparkling clean, breaking her back doing it, he was sitting in the sand, tinkering with his art, enjoying the good life.”

  I blinked and just stared. How could a man do that? Leave his family and just live his life on a beach somewhere doing what he loved while his family back on the mainland suffered. “Asshole,” I murmured under my breath.

  “Exactly!” He grabbed up the files and put the money back into the wall with the box.

  “What’s in the files?”

  “I don’t know yet. All I know is I’ve learned enough for one day.”

  As we walked out of the deposit room, the banker bustled over to us. “Mr. Powers.”

  “Yeah?” Atlas stopped, frustration written all over the lines in his face.

  “You asked me to research the unit fee?”

  “Oh. Yes. Find anything?” Atlas asked with far less enthusiasm than he’d had before we opened the box.

  The bank manager smiled and handed him a piece of paper. “Kenneth Powers has paid the box in full every year. The bill goes to his physical address in Oahu, Hawaii. I’ve taken the liberty of writing the address there.”

  Atlas looked down at the piece of paper, his body stiff as a board. “Thank you,” he gritted through his teeth. “Come on, Mila. Let’s go.” He grabbed my hand and stuffed the paper in the top folder. He dipped his chin at the banker and led me out of the bank into the chilly San Francisco morning.

  He tucked me into his car and got in. Then he just stared out the window, not moving, not doing anything.

  “What are you going to do with the information?” I wasn’t sure what else to say.

  His shoulders fell, and his head lopped forward and hit the steering wheel where his hands rested. “I don’t know. Fuck. I don’t know.”

  Chapter Eighteen

  Tiptoe Pose - Standing (Sanskrit: Prapadasana)

  I personally consider this a tiptoe pose modification. Prapadasana is typically done while crouching with the knees together and the bum hovering over the heels. However, this particular modification helps with stretching the spine, opening the chest and shoulders, as well as working on balancing. It’s a beginner level pose that makes the yogi feel strong and alive.

  MILA

  For the next week, Atlas was like a stranger to me. He didn’t smile as often, didn’t hum random tunes, and did not sit for my art. Not that it mattered, since I wouldn’t be showing those pieces anytime soon. Atlas taught his classes at Lotus House but canceled last weekend’s show at Harmony Jack’s. He was able to reschedule to this weekend, but he didn’t seem any better, and I knew he had an appointment early next week with the Knight & Day team for them to hear his new songs. However, I wasn’t sure he had finished those, either. Basically, Atlas was a walking, talking zombie. He needed to snap out of his funk, but I had no idea how to get him back to himself.

  I walked through the doors at Lotus House and made my way to Atlas’s class. I didn’t usually attend his naked yoga class because he’d said it was too distracting having me there. Said it was too hard for him to avoid getting an erection. Today, I didn’t care. I wanted him to have an erection because he hadn’t touched me since he’d opened the damn safe-deposit box. I almost wished I’d never have seen the correlation to the stupid key in the first place. Then none of this would have happened, and I’d be sexually satisfied instead of grouchy and horned up. Well, that was going to end today. My man was going to fuck me six ways from Sunday if it was the last thing I did in this world.

  As I entered, he was setting up at the riser. Without bringing attention to myself, I sneaked all the way to the far right corner. The same corner that I’d been in when I first took this class. Atlas continued to do his thing, prep his area, set the music, light candles, and close the blinds. Right at the strike of three, he closed and locked the door. I’d already shed my clothes and sat down among the other patrons.

  He still hadn’t noticed me, which, truth be told, actually hurt more than I wanted to believe. We’d always been in tune with one another, ever since the first day a couple months ago. Now that he’d found out about his dad and knew where he was living high on the hog while his mom was struggling, he hadn’t been the same. From this experience, I learned my guy felt things deep, and I had to find a way to break through it.

  I watched as Atlas stood on the platform and dropped his yoga pants. My mouth watered at the sight of his cock, free of hair, hanging down along with a nice set of balls. His thighs were solid muscle and corded beautifully to the knee where his large calves showed off the hunk of toned flesh down to his slim ankles and bare feet. My God, he was everything a man should be, and all mine. I had to bite back a groan at seeing my guy naked for the first time in a week. Every day since the bank run, he’d blown off staying with me and found reasons to not have me stay with him. I knew he was hurting and needed time to think, but from what I’ve read, when you’re a couple you needed to lean on the one you loved, not push them away.

  “Thank you for coming, everyone. Now, I want you to close your eyes and set your intention for today’s practice. Think about what you want to get out of freeing yourself from your clothes and your inhibitions, and leave anything that doesn’t serve you at the door. This time is for you.” He scanned the entire room. His eyes flashed in recognition when they landed on me, and the first smile I’d seen on him in a week spread across his face. He walked over to me slowly. I blatantly admired his body in all its sculpted glory. When he got to me, he kneeled down on one knee, grasped my chin between thumb and forefinger, and leaned close enough to speak directly to me without anyone else being able to hear.

  “Hey, baby.” He smiled, and my heart did a straight-up pitter-patter.

  “Hi, curly.” I offered him my own cheesy grin.

  He leaned in and slanted his lips over my mouth. His spicy, earthy scent filled the air around us as he delved his tongue just enough to tease. I sighed, opening up for him instantly. He pulled back and sucked on my bottom lip.

  “You know I don’t like it when you come to this class,” he said, all the while leering at my tits.

  They peaked instantly at his gaze. He reached out one hand and cupped my left breast, swiping over the nipple with his thumb. I bit my lip hard enough to bruise.

  “Yeah, but it’s the only way I thought I could see you naked.”

  He hummed, still playing with my nipple. “Are you feeling neglected?” He plumped my tit perfectly in his giant hand.

  I nodded, unable to speak.

 
; “Class, I want you to keep your eyes closed and sway from left to right, like you’re flowing in the current, just like seaweed under the water. Loosening that spine, let the neck tip and flow with it.” He addressed the class but didn’t take his hands off me.

  “Atlas…” I mewled and grabbed him by the back of the neck and forced his lips to mine. I kissed him with everything I had. My fear, my strength, the divine desire split me in half, but more than that, I kissed him with all the love I had within me.

  He took what I had to give and growled his need in return. Before long, we were kissing like horny teenagers right in the middle of a naked yoga class. His dick was rock hard, my center was slick as hell, and we needed to fuck. Straight up, we needed to mate.

  He pulled back and rested his forehead against mine, breathing roughly.

  “I love you, please come back to me,” I whispered the three little words I’d never once said to him before but meant them with the enormity of this moment. I needed him. I wanted him. I loved him, and he needed to shake off this funk and come back to me.

  He curled a hand around my nape. “Baby, I never left.”

  “But you did,” I choked out, tears filling my eyes.

  With that, he pulled up and then walked away. I almost bawled right then and there, until I realized he was tapping someone on the shoulder. Dash’s dark blond head lifted up. In my haste to pop in unannounced, I hadn’t realized that Dash and Amber were sitting in the class next to one another. Way to go, Amber! When I’d painted them a few weeks ago, she started out shy, but before too long, they were totally comfortable being naked in front of me. During that session, Amber had complained that Dash wouldn’t let her take the naked yoga class, and she wanted to try it, to set herself free. Apparently, she’d worn him down because there she was, pert boobies and athletic body on display. Good for her!

  I sniffed my own emotion back and noticed that Dash nodded, glanced over at me, and grinned. Then he stood up and took to the riser. Before he turned around, I noticed Dash had a fine ass. Rock hard and svelte to go with the rest of him.

  “Change of plan, folks, I’ll be teaching this class today, but don’t worry, I’ve studied with Atlas and I’m happy to fill in. Now let’s stretch those arms up and above your head reaching for the sky…” Dash continued the class, but I stopped hearing him.

  All I could focus on was the alpha male looming over to me. “Time to go, hotness.” He grabbed my bicep with one hand and my things in the other. He took the time to put the simple maxi dress I’d worn over my head. He was only wearing his yoga pants. Then, without a word, he led me out of the room, down the hall to one of the private rooms. We entered, and within seconds, the door was shut and I was against it.

  Atlas pulled my dress up and over my head again, baring my body to his desire. His lips went straight for my breast, and he wrapped that hot mouth around one erect bud and sucked…hard. I called out, arching into his succulent kiss. “Missed you.” I raked my nails along his scalp.

  With that, he growled and sucked even harder. He ripped his mouth away from my breast as if it were a serious hardship. His expression was a scowl. “Need you. Need everything about you. Can’t get enough.”

  Atlas suddenly dropped to his knees, and his lips hit my clit so fast I barely had time to hold myself up. He curled his hands around my ass and pushed me onto his face, forcing my legs to a wider stance.

  He growled and hummed as he ate me with a wild abandon. His licks were fierce, his suction deep, and his tongue unrelenting against my clit until I came hard against the door. Shaking, knees buckling in the most divine pleasure. In seconds, Atlas had his pants down and lifted me up until I’d wrapped my legs around his waist.

  “Sorry,” he said, notching the wide crown of his penis against my entrance. “So fucking sorry.” He thrust inside, all the way to the hilt. I inhaled hard as the pressure struck deep. There was absolutely no space between us.

  “Mila, baby…” Atlas whispered against my face, kissing anything his lips came into contact with.

  I gripped his hair and pulled his head back. “Don’t do that to me again. Don’t abandon me,” I growled, my heart pounding in my chest. Tears filled my eyes and fell down my cheeks. “I don’t like it. So don’t. Do. It. Again,” I ground out between my teeth.

  He rested his forehead against mine, shifted his hips back until his cock barely clung to the lips of my pussy, and then he rammed forward as he covered my mouth with his.

  I cried as he fucked me. Cried for the loss of his dad, for the little boy who’d been abandoned, for the hell he’d been put through, and for the fact that I’d gone an entire week without this connection. When we were together, everything seemed right. Nothing could break us as long as we stayed glued to one another.

  “I love you. I won’t abandon you again, Mila. Never again,” he promised and lied.

  ATLAS

  The lights above blinded me as I went into my second original song, but the last of the second set for the evening. Bodies swayed and gyrated all around the stage, but I only had eyes for one crazy-beautiful woman. Every time she turned around and presented me with her bare back and the ass-hugging, barely there dress, I groaned internally. My girl was going to get a massive spanking for rocking that dress when I couldn’t be there to touch and tease. I’d have to make her wear it again, only to a proper dinner. Even though we’d been officially a couple for closing on two months now, we didn’t spend much time dining out. Frankly, neither of us had the money. But we found ways to make up for that. Like tonight. I was rocking out at Harmony Jack’s, and my woman was dancing the night away.

  I couldn’t wait to sing the song I’d written for her especially after I had avoided her for a week. The shit we found in the safe-deposit box had taken its toll on me. I had been treading water, drowning in a sea of heartache over what my dad had done. Leaving me that money and the gallery my grandfather had owned. Another thing I still hadn’t discussed with Mila but would much later tonight after I’d made love to her. And it would be making love. We’d both said the words, however randomly, but they were there; the feelings were mutual, and we didn’t have to repeat them all the time to know it lived between us.

  When she showed up at my class a few days ago and put me in my place after leaving her hanging all week, that meant more to me than she’d ever know. It meant she’d fought for us, for what was between us. I’d never had a woman besides my mom fight for me. An entirely new but not unwelcome sensation. Since that day, I’d gotten inside Mila as much as humanly possible. I wouldn’t have been surprised if the girl was bowlegged for how many times I’d fucked her the past few days. I just couldn’t get enough. She didn’t complain and now she was here, supporting me in my dream even if it was just a pub in San Francisco.

  Standing away from the stool, I shimmied my hips in a silly Elvis-esque move and shredded on the guitar to get her attention. The crowd went wild, clapping and screaming when I belted out the last word. Mila had been dancing and clapping along with the rest of them. The lights blinked out right at the end of my song. Once they slowly came back on, though lower than normal, I knew it was break time.

  “Thanks so much! I’ll be back for another couple sets in about thirty minutes.”

  After I addressed the crowd, I hopped down and went looking for my girl. I found her waiting dead center of the dance floor, as usual, arms ready for me.

  She surrounded me with her flower-and-cinnamon scent as I put my arms around her. I pushed my hands right into the open back of her dress and palmed her ass. I felt a pathetic scrap of lace going straight between her butt cheeks covering absolutely nothing of the goods that lay under it. “You’re wearing underwear?” I growled into her ear, nibbling on the bit of flesh.

  Mila jerked her hips against my denim-covered hardening cock. “Yeah, I didn’t think you’d be happy with me going commando in a dress this short.”

  “Dead right.” I squeezed her ass and teased the fabric with my finger. “Yet
, you still chose to rock my world with this sexy as fuck scrap of fabric. Are you trying to taunt me?”

  She pulled back and grinned. “No, but anticipation is half the fun, right? Just think how great it will be to take it off of me later.”

  I ran my nose along the thin column of her neck, inhaling deeply of her scent, imprinting it on me. I kissed her once, then twice. “Come on. I need a drink before my next set.”

  Mila threaded her thumb through my belt loop, a comforting weight I’d become accustomed to.

  Just as we hit the bar, Jack was there.

  “Sounding killer, Powers! Your fans are doubling the nights you’re here. Need to get you on the schedule for the next couple months.” She laid out a frosty cold beer for me and what looked like a gin and tonic for Mila. I never knew what the girl was drinking because it always changed based on what she was in the mood for that evening.

  “Thanks, Jack!” I dipped my chin and then sucked back a long pull of the pale ale. The hops flavor instantly quenched my parched palate.

  “She is not wrong,” came a voice from behind me. I half expected one of my bros, since I’d told the guys I’d be playing tonight, and usually on a weekend, the gang would come. So far, it had been crickets. I turned around and stopped short at a man in a suit. Now, I wasn’t talking about a suit you’d get at Macy’s. No, this suit cost more than my rent—for the year. He wore a pair of black wire-rimmed glasses and a satin tie that said, “I can buy whatever I damn well want and will look damn good doing it.”

  “Uh, thanks.” I looped my arm around Mila’s neck. “Can I help you?”

  The man smirked. “No, because I’m here to help you.” His tone was overconfident and rather smug.

  “Is that so?”

  “It is.” He rolled back and then forward from his heels to his toes.

  “Care to elaborate?”

  He pursed his lips and put his hands into his pockets. “Name’s James Pinkerton and I’m going to make you a very rich man.”