by Tracy Ewens
“The very one,” Makenna answered.
“Wow. That’s pretty cool.”
“Oh, and I almost forgot—the opener then has to eat the apple,” Logan added.
“Huh, that’s great. When do the festivities start?”
As if on cue, Garrett walked up with Paige on his shoulders. She was still carrying a piece of toast and she’d put on her red puffy jacket. Her long blonde pigtails were braided.
“Your hair looks beautiful,” Makenna said, touching Paige’s braid. “I know your uncle didn’t do that hair, did you get Kara to help?”
“He did! While I was putting breakfast in my belly, Uncle braided. He’s super fast.”
“You braided her hair?” Kenna looked at Garrett.
He wrinkled his brow. “Uh, yeah, that surprises you? I braided yours a time or two when we were growing up. Logan always gets the credit, but I did my share of braiding and feminine product purchasing.”
They all laughed.
Paige reached for him, and after a warning glare Travis was sure he deserved, Garrett set Paige down next to him. She pulled her uncle down and kissed his cheek and then took Travis’s hand. Her little hand nestled into his, and suddenly he went from existing to living again, just like that.
“Hey, I saw some flowers over by the barn. Maybe we should put some flowers in your braids.”
Paige beamed up at him. “I love flowers.”
“Most girls do.”
“Yeah, what else do you know about girls, My Travis?”
He laughed, and Paige swung their clasped hands back and forth. She was looking up at him, waiting for an answer. “Oh, you want me to answer that. Okay, well, I know that girls like animals.”
Paige nodded. “Not all girls like them. Some girls think they smell, but those girls are stupid.” She quickly put her hand over her mouth.
“Is stupid not allowed?”
Paige shook her head. “Mama and I have a list now of words that are not allowed. She says it’s because I’m getting bigger and sassier. I need to keep eyes on my mouth, that’s what she says.”
“Yeah, me too.” Travis looked toward the barn and found the wildflower patch he remembered passing.
“So, what else do girls like?”
“They . . . like stories and pancakes. They like cookies.”
Paige nodded enthusiastically.
“They like mac and cheese. They like drawing pictures. Oh, and all girls like to talk.”
“Yes, we do. Mama talks a lot, sometimes to herself. And I’ve even heard her say a few words on the list.”
Travis laughed, crouched down, and picked a few yellow and white flowers.
“Okay, harvest princess, hold still.”
Travis put a few flowers down her braids and then tucked some in the elastics at the end. Paige stood stock-still, looking up at the birds and the wind blowing through the trees above them.
“I think that will do it. You look beautiful.”
She swished her braids and smiled at him. The sun touched her tiny face, and Travis knew he would always want her in his life. If he had to conjure up some scenario without Kenna, he would deal with that, but he’d never met a little girl like Paige and he was pretty sure his heart would stop if he ever had to let her go.
“Can you lift me up so I can see?” she asked, walking in her little cowboy boots toward a truck parked next to the barn.
“Sure.”
He lifted her and this time, when she smiled, Travis noticed her front tooth had grown all the way in. Another milestone he was there to witness.
“They look very pretty. Thank you, My Travis.” She kissed him on the cheek.
He set her down, and she took his hand again as they walked back to join the group.
“I noticed your tooth is all the way in now.”
“Yup.” She nodded. “You know what else girls like?”
“What?”
“Boys.”
He laughed.
“Is that so?”
She nodded. “I mean, not all boys because some are . . . not smart,” Paige said, clearly trying to avoid another word on the list. “But nice boys, smart boys who cook for us and make us lunch—me and Mama, we like those kinds of boys.”
Travis grinned and squeezed her little hand. Right before they reached the group, he leaned down and kissed her on the cheek. “I like you and your mama too, Paige.”
Her cheeks pinked, and she swished her braids one more time and ran back to Kenna. Just like that, Travis knew two kinds of love.
“Impressive work, man,” Garrett said after Paige showed him her flowers.
“Hey, thanks.” Travis fell in step next to Kenna as they approached what looked like the entrance to the orchard.
“You ready to head in? You always take so damn long,” Garrett said, handing Makenna a canvas bag with a leather strap.
She fastened the strap around her neck, letting the bag hang in front of her.
“Do I get one of those?” Travis asked.
Garrett handed him the other one he was holding. “You think you can keep up, city boy?”
Travis laughed, and Kenna walked toward the orchard as Paige cried out, “We’re starting. We’re starting.”
“Hey, where are you going?” he asked, barely realizing he’d touched her arm.
“I’m the opener.”
When she turned and walked into the orchard she’d been visiting since she was a little girl, younger than her daughter, Makenna looked up and felt whole. Her face flushed and her stomach was jumpy.
As she walked among the apple trees, she touched the trunks and listened to the crunching and the early morning birds overhead. The air was moist and chilled. She felt alive and grounded in the land that helped make her. When she was nine rows back, she turned right and counted six trees in this time. That would be her tree this year. The last time she’d been opener, her life had been a day-to-day struggle to stay sane. She remembered walking the same nine rows back, touching each tree and barely being able to continue. Nine had been Adam’s lucky number, so much so that they were married on September 9th. He’d been crazy superstitious; Kenna smiled at the memory now. After she’d gotten to nine, she’d turned right and counted one tree for each year of Paige’s life. He’d been gone almost three years back then and she was still drowning in grief. It may have been a morning much like this one, but she had not noticed. She’d stood in the middle of the orchard, listening to her trees and crying for what she had lost and the changes she wasn’t sure she could handle.
This time, she counted six trees to the right, lifted her face to the sun that was now just starting to peek through the leaves, and sent a kiss up to him, her first love, the father of her sweet baby girl. He was always with her: sometimes it was an ache, but lately she’d found him more in a gust of ocean air or in the ice cream-covered smile of their daughter. Paralyzing sadness had turned to ache, and Kenna had learned a long time ago that ache was simply part of life. Good and bad, yin and yang. She reached up, picked her apple, and walked back toward her good.
Travis waited until last. He patiently watched what was really the coolest thing he’d seen in a long time. At least three dozen people performed the ritual and kissed a now beaming and laughing Makenna Rye. Paige was already running in and out of the trees with a smaller bag around her neck. Garrett, Logan, and Kara were chasing her. Her giggle echoed through the morning air. Travis stepped forward after a short man in a plaid shirt kissed Makenna and joined the others.
Their eyes met.
“Do you know what you’re doing?” she asked quietly.
Travis stepped close to her, placed his cheek next to her cold cheek, and almost collapsed. It had been a month—four weeks since he’d touched her, and his body coursed with everything it had been missing.
“I know exactly what I’m doing now,” he whispered in her ear and reached up to take the apple off her head. Makenna was silent as he polished it. He was the last one, so he handed it to
her, allowing his hands to touch hers. He faced her and with his other hand, he gently pulled her closer. “Would it be all right if I broke with tradition just this once?”
Makenna shook her head. “I’m not sure that’s such a good idea. We’ve been doing this for years, and you know any change could be bad luck.”
“It’s just a small one,” he said as his eyes fell to her lips.
“Well, I guess, if it’s small.”
He could feel her heart pounding as if it had missed him too. Kenna turned her cheek to him, just like she had done with everyone else, and he grinned. Right to the very end, she was going to make him work for it. Maximum effort. He gently took her face and turned her to face him.
“What are you doing?”
Her eyes told him she knew exactly what he was doing right before they fluttered closed and he kissed her. Travis, aware of the eyes peeking out of the orchard, only took a taste even though he was starving. He allowed his tongue to dip into her mouth and then when her lips curved, he pulled back.
Makenna let out a sigh. “You’re getting really good at this showing up thing,” she said and took a bite of her apple. The orchard erupted in applause and whistles. Travis grabbed her around the waist and kissed her again, right there in front of her family and people he didn’t even know. He didn’t care. Her cool lips tasted of sweet apples, and he was so happy to have her back in his arms that nothing else mattered. He’d shown up; Logan had been right. Travis looked back toward the trees and saw his friend smiling and shaking his head.
“About damn time,” he shouted.
Travis laughed and hoped Logan knew how grateful he was for their friendship. Garrett moved next to his brother. “Well, hell, looks like she was checking him out after all.” Both men laughed, and Makenna shrugged as if she’d been teased most of her life.
“I love you.” He took her back in his arms.
“I love you too.” This time, Kenna kissed him like she meant it, and Travis suddenly remembered something his father used to tell them during football practice. “Lock it down,” he used to say. As Travis got older, he learned that was just a dude way of saying, “Hold on.” Lock it down was exactly what he intended to do, for the rest of his life, if she’d have him.
Kenna fell asleep on the drive back to her house. They’d picked apples all day and Travis had offered to drive her and Paige home. Garrett would bring her car around in the morning before they needed to leave for school, so they all drove home in the warm bed of his truck. When they arrived, Paige invited Travis in and introduced him to her tuck-in ritual, and Kenna even let him take over as guest burrito maker. Everywhere she looked, he fit, and that no longer scared her. All she felt when she looked at him was warmth and love, a comfort she wasn’t sure she’d ever feel again.
They closed the door as Paige was drifting off and even though Kenna invited him to stay, Travis said he had something to take care of. She kissed him and didn’t even bother trying to read. She fell asleep as soon as her face hit the pillow.
Chapter Thirty-Six
Makenna woke up in her pajama bottoms and a tank top the next morning. She pulled on the fuzzy pair of socks next to her bed, brushed her teeth, and when she heard the low rumble of his laughter and the blissful giggle of her daughter, she tensed. But when she walked out of the bathroom, there was no cat and the walls were blue, so she walked out to the kitchen.
She turned into the kitchen just like the dream, but no one was there. Travis and Paige were in the living room, side by side on the couch. Still in her pj’s, Paige sat, legs crisscrossed with Fritters in the space between them. They were both bowled over laughing and pointing at the television.
“Ewww,” Paige exclaimed.
“Whoa, that one’s worse.” Travis winced and looked away. He caught her watching them and grinned.
“Hey, good morning.”
Paige hopped up and ran to Kenna’s side, taking her hand and pulling her toward the couch.
“What are you two watching?”
“Grossest bugs. It’s awesome—come sit. Here, I’ll move Fritters.” Paige climbed back up on the couch and patted the piece of couch between the two of them.
Makenna sat as some black beetle-looking thing was biting the head off of some smaller green stick-looking thing.
“Oh!” Paige and Travis both bellowed again as if they were watching some sporting event. Makenna sat there, sandwiched between the two of them, feeling their warmth and laughter. She wasn’t sure it got any better than this.
Travis leaned over, still watching the bug massacre, and kissed her on her shoulder. He was in sweatpants, not pajama bottoms, and unfortunately, his beautiful chest was covered by a faded-to-almost-invisible T-shirt. He cleared his throat and looked at Paige, who was enthralled with watching worms. It looked like they were possibly swarming an ant hill; Kenna wasn’t sure, but she looked away.
“Why are we watching this so early in the morning?”
“Because it’s awesome,” Paige said, and then looked at Travis when he waved his hand in front of her face. “Oh, right. Okay, are we ready?” Paige stood up and put on her monster slippers.
Travis shook his head, laughing.
“Ready for what? It’s Sunday, and I hope you two don’t have big plans because I am not moving from this couch today.” She propped her feet up on the coffee table to emphasize her commitment to lazy.
Travis looked at Paige, who promptly started to giggle.
“What are you two up to?”
“Oh nothing,” she said, walking toward the kitchen. “My Travis bought us new lunch boxes.”
“He did?” Kenna glanced over, and Travis was smiling and nodding as if he knew what was coming next. “What was wrong with Daniel?”
Paige squished her face. “Well, he was getting a little shiny.”
“Shabby,” Travis and Kenna both corrected, which should have felt weird, but it didn’t.
“Wait, did you say ‘us’? He bought ‘us’ new lunch boxes?”
“I did. Yes.” Paige was now speaking slowly like she was explaining something complicated. Her eyes moved back to Travis. “Now?” she asked him.
Travis nodded and was again laughing. She couldn’t blame him because whatever Paige was up to was pretty damn cute. She ran into the kitchen and returned holding two lunch boxes. One looked like a newer version of Daniel Tiger. Maybe it had a different picture? Kenna couldn’t remember. Paige handed her one of those modern-looking lunch boxes that seemed like it was made out of wetsuit material. It was black with tiny white polka dots. Kenna looked at Travis, who smiled.
“This one’s for you, Mama, for your lunch.”
Kenna slowly took the lunch box and set it on her lap. Travis picked up the remote and silenced the television.
“Is this a hint that I should take my lunch?” Makenna said, running her hand along the side of the material and looking to Travis for more information. “It’s a fantastic lunch box.”
“I know. I picked it out,” Paige said, standing close and bouncing around like she had to pee.
Travis was abnormally quiet, but she could almost see the waves of energy flowing off of him. She set the lunch box on the table. “Are you all right?”
He took her hand and when their eyes met, his were soft and melty, almost as if he’d just finished watching a sad movie.
Paige huffed, picked up the lunch box, and set it back in Makenna’s lap. “You have to open it. This only works if you open the box, Mama.”
Travis laughed again but still said nothing. Makenna furrowed her brow, still confused, and slowly unzipped the lunch box. Inside was a piece of folded construction paper. She unfolded it and the letter was written in crayon, but not in Paige’s handwriting. It was Travis’s writing. She read the letter.
Makenna—
Please let me make your lunch too. I promise to always show up and I’ll take suggestions.
I love you,
Travis
P.S. Open the bo
x.
Surrounding the letter were flowers and hearts Kenna recognized as Paige’s artwork. There were two stick figures kissing in the bottom corner and a smaller stick figure holding their hands. Kenna’s first tear hit the orange construction paper.
“She’s crying,” Paige said, walking over to Travis. “Oh no, this is bad, right?” She crawled into his lap.
Travis kissed her cheek and whispered, “Let’s give it one more minute.”
Makenna reached into the lunch box and pulled out a ring box. She looked at Travis, eyes still melty, and then at Paige, whose hands were clenched and eyes were saucers. She let out a slow breath, wiped the tear off her cheek, and opened the box. The hand not holding the box went to her mouth. It was a square-cut diamond, set on a narrow band and framed in what looked like platinum. The ring sparkled even in the muted light of morning.
Travis stood, still holding Paige, and then deposited her on the couch. “This is my part. Be right back.”
Paige nodded and clapped while Travis dropped to his knee next to Kenna at the other end of the couch. Her heart was pounding and as hard as she tried, she couldn’t order her mind. Travis took her hand and the box.
“Makenna Rye Conroy, I love you. I know you and Paige have a great life, built on a really great dream.” He cleared his throat and held her hand a little tighter because his was shaking. “That should never go away, but maybe there’s room for another dream: our dream. You two are the very best things that have ever happened to me, my A-plus by a mile, and I promise to love you both and put in the work every day.”
Makenna was now crying again, but she smiled over at Paige, who promptly flashed Travis the thumbs-up and ran to his side.
“It’s working,” Paige whispered at his ear. “Put the pretty ring on her now.”
Travis took the ring out of the box. “Makenna, please marry me. Let me make you both lunch.”
Makenna nodded her head because she couldn’t speak, and Travis slid the ring on her finger. She stood and he stood with her. She wiped her face and then held his between her two shaking hands. “Yes, yes to everything.” She kissed him, and Paige danced around the two of them. Travis swooped her up with one arm and she gave him a high-five.