“Lumi?” he asks, and I snap out of my thoughts. I get the feeling he’s repeating himself when he says, “How would you like to watch a movie with me? We have tons to choose from.”
I glance at the ancient television set bolted to the wall. The Fae don’t use them, due to the technology and environmentally unsound features, so I’ve never seen one in person and therefore didn’t register it on first glance. I have no idea how to use one and have never had the chance to learn, and excitement creeps up my spine at the concept. “Sure. You pick?”
Eir scoffs at me, but there is humor in his gaze. “That would be very ungentlemanly of me,” he says very seriously; standing up and walking over towards the rectangular contraption. It is situated above a dark wooden stand with doors, and he pushes them aside to reveal a bunch of small boxes containing what I am guessing are ‘movies’. I crane my neck to try and see what he’s doing and immediately return to a ladylike position when he turns to face me. “How about I give you some choices and you pick instead?”
I notice these Dolans are very roundabout stubborn. I nod and he flops down next to me with three weird-looking containers in his hands. “Okay, these are three of my all-time favorite movies,” he says, looking almost nervous. “We have ‘The Goonies’— which is about a group of friends who are about to lose their houses and have to move away from each other. They decide to go looking for a pirate ship and treasure. It’s awesome. Then we have ‘Rocky’ — this is the ultimate underdog story and it’s about boxers. I love it. And last but not least, we have ‘The Princess Bride’. It’s hilarious! There’s romance and action and humor, and I have yet to meet a person who didn’t enjoy it. What do you think, Lulu?”
He hands me the selection and lets me take a look at the covers. They all sound good, even though I worry ‘The Princess Bride’ is going to hit a little too close to home for me. I feel myself blushing at the concept of choosing; telling myself this is not a trap and saying, “I have a weakness for underdog stories.” I flip ‘Rocky’ over in my hands a couple times and see him smiling out of the corner of my eye.
“Excellent choice,” he says, and takes it from me when I offer it back. He looks pleasantly surprised by my selection as he scampers back to the TV set, hits the DVD player a couple times and within a few seconds, images come to life on the screen. Eir closes the curtains and comes to sit beside me; surprising me by resting his arm on the couch behind me.
It’s a good thing the movie is good, because if it weren’t I don’t think I would’ve been able to keep myself from falling asleep curled against his chest. About halfway through I lean against him and his huge hand settles hesitantly on my shoulder. I do believe it’s the calmest moment of my life.
Chapter 25—Fi
August 2102
The sun is just breaking over the horizon, shining through the open window and I’m sitting on the floor in the library wading through yet another dusty box of what seems to be everything but my Gran’s journals. I am doing my best not to think of my parents’ fate, even though my mind keeps circling back around to it every few minutes without my permission. I woke early like always, and though I did wake Flint (again), he decided to stay in bed when I promised to skip my run this morning. So it’s me and a thermos of coffee up here alone. Although I did bring a small jug of milk, a second mug and spoon in case Lumi decides to join me. I’m determined to get through all of the remaining boxes today, regardless of whatever new catastrophe might arise.
So far today I have unearthed another stack of my dad’s journals and some books that I believe were Gran’s that she must have hidden away so younger eyes didn’t find them. They seem to be racy romance novels, and I know they aren’t anything my mother would ever have even considered reading, not that my mother enjoyed reading to begin with. Seeing the dusty covers with titles like Burned by His Desire made me giggle and blush, even though I was alone when I found them. Thankfully. I think if Flint had seen them, his inevitable comments might have been too much for me to handle.
I’m standing on a wooden chair, sliding another box back onto the shelf when I hear a noise behind me and turn to see Lumi standing in the doorway. “Morning! I didn’t want to startle you while you were up there,” she says with a smile, and I grin back.
“Good morning! There’s coffee by the sofa if you’d like some.” The words are barely out of my mouth before she says “Yay!” and skips away. I grab another box from the top shelf and move it down where I can reach it from the floor before hopping down off the chair. I drag the box down off the shelf and lug it over to the corner by the sofa where I’ve been working.
Lumi looks up at me over the top of her steaming mug, humming to herself, and settles on the floor next to me asking, “Can I help?”
“Yes, you can definitely help if you’d like to,” I say with a grateful smile. “I think we can both work in this box, and when we’re done I’ll grab two more.”
She nods happily and digs in the box with me, only pausing occasionally to gulp her coffee. We work quietly together for a little while and then I see Lumi pull a dusty novel out of the box with a risqué looking trio on the cover. A slim, well-curved woman is half naked and sandwiched between two half naked, very well-built men. Her eyes are closed and one arm is snaking up to grab the head of the man behind her, who has his hand on her hip. Her other hand is splayed on the chest of the man in front of her, who has his hand on her other hip. I bite my lip to hold in a giggle when I see the title, Her Forbidden Temptation.
"I sincerely hope this isn’t the instruction manual we’re looking for," Lumi says, snickering.
"Oh my. That would make things a bit more er...interesting, wouldn't it? What does the back say?" I ask, laughing with her.
Lifting the book in front of her to read the back cover, Lumi recites in a husky femme fatale voice, “Eighteen-year old Savannah St. James is a southern belle with a big problem. She has always known she would marry a Delacroix man someday, she just never could decide which one—”
“What’s going on?” breaks in on my giggles and Lumi’s reading of the synopsis of the book. We look up, Lumi still holding the book up, and I see Eir standing there looking shocked. His face and ears turn red when he gets a good look at the book cover. One look at my brother’s face and I start laughing in earnest. He keeps looking from the book cover to Lumi’s reddening face and then at the floor, and I find myself gasping for breath from laughing so hard.
“Um, we were, uh—” Lumi shoots me a look of censure and blushes deeply. “We were looking through books and found, um, well, a…book.”
“Whose is that?” Eir asks. His face is now the color of a brick wall and I break into a new round of giggles. Lumi looks like she’d like to cover her face and glances at me with a look that clearly begs for help.
“I've been finding them all morning. They must have been Gran's!” I gasp out between giggles and pound on the floor a few times, trying to rein in my laughter.
“Gran's?" Eir asks, sounding even more shocked and unable to look at Lumi any longer. He is studying the floor by his feet now.
"Yes, Gran's. Your Gran's, not mine, I don't—I mean—" Lumi growls, color still deepening the red on her cheeks. "I'm gonna shut up now." And I’m laughing again.
Flint comes in behind Eir and slips around him. “What's all the excitement about?” I feel his eyes move over me as I’m practically rolling on the ground at this point, and then he sees what Lumi is holding and can't seem to form a response for a second. "Um?"
Lumi immediately slam dunks the book back in the box it came from, looking like she’d like to run away, and I decide it’s time to compose myself. “We found a book!” I sputter brilliantly between giggles. I look up to see my brother put his head in his hands. He looks like he, too, would like to flee the library.
"I can see that," Flint says, sounding amused.
Lumi looks embarrassed by the whole situation. "Look — we found book porn in their grandmother’s box of be
longings. It is not that big of a deal!"
I hear Flint start laughing over the sound of my new explosion of laughter. “Eir is not comfortable with the fact that our Gran liked these kinds of books," I manage.
I see my brother cross to the bookshelves and start lightly banging his head against the outside of one muttering, “Shoot me now” so low I can barely hear him. Flint braces himself against the wall by the windows, almost doubled over laughing. I can feel myself edging in on hysteria at this point. I’m gasping for breath, my ribs ache and there are tears in my eyes. My poor brother looks like he’d like the carpet to swallow him whole though, so I try once more to pull myself together for his sake.
“Eir, can you go put on a fresh pot of coffee?” I manage to ask without laughing. He nods and literally runs from the room without making eye contact with anyone. I turn to see Flint trying valiantly to straighten and get himself under control, and grin up into his eyes and ask, “Could you grab a couple more boxes for us to go through, please?”
Shoulders shaking still, he manages to nod and heads into the closet for me. I turn to the Winter princess sitting next to me on the floor as she scowls at the book in the box in front of us and pat her on the arm, whispering, “It will be okay. He’ll come back and pretend nothing happened, I guarantee it.” I wink at her, knowing my brother, and she grins at me.
Flint, who is still laughing, drags out three more boxes and brings them over to where we are situated and then sits on my other side; pulling one of the boxes further into his reach with a sigh. I grin at him. “Don’t worry, Eir will be back with caffeine soon.”
He looks at me and smirks. "After that little event, I don't think I'll be passing out in your lap anytime soon." I glance over to see Lumi buried in her box, refusing to acknowledge Flint’s comment in any way. I nudge him with my elbow and mouth the words, “Be nice” to him. He grins and shrugs at me, attempting to look innocent.
When my brother returns with the coffee and more mugs, he is calm and his complexion has returned to a normal hue. He can’t seem to meet Lumi’s eyes, though. He must like her a lot more than I realized. Flint winks at me and gets up to claim some coffee for himself with a huge grin on his face. I smile as Lumi bounces to her feet for a refill when Eir settles the coffee on the stand behind us. Her face is still a bit pink, but she seems to be recovering better than Eir. I direct my brother to one of the other boxes Flint brought out. He settles himself under the window and immediately digs into his box, not looking at any of us.
With all four of us working, it only takes a few hours to get through the rest of the boxes in the library closet. Close to mid-afternoon, Lumi is perusing an old book she found in her last box and Eir is sneaking glances at her every few moments and then looking away. Flint is taking it all in, chuckling softly to himself every so often while I dig through the very last box. When I reach the bottom and still haven’t uncovered any of Gran’s journals, I sigh and push the box away from me, completely disgusted. “Well, there aren’t any of Gran’s journals in here.” I look at Flint and dread makes my heart heavy. “Looks like we’ll have to head to Gran’s room next.”
“I’m at your disposal, love,” he says with a wink and my face heats. I glance away to hide the evidence but before I can say anything else, my brother speaks for the first time in hours.
“Lumi, would you like to play Rummy with me, by any chance?” he asks, sounding hopeful and shy.
The Winter princess looks relieved and nods happily up at him. “I’d love to, thank you.” Eir offers her his hand and helps her to her feet, grinning, and she turns to Flint and me and says, “If you need any more help, just let us know.” Then she waves and scampers off with my brother.
Flint and I watch them leave; Eir tall and dark where Lumi is petite and blonde, and I can’t contain my grin. Flint looks at me, shakes his head and says, "They're combusting with cartoon hearts, I swear to God." I laugh with him and silently agree with his assessment; they are absolutely adorable. He starts returning boxes to the closet while I pile things back into my last box, and as I’m closing it back up, he returns and picks it up before I can get up off the floor to bring it to him.
I’m not looking forward to investigating Gran’s old room at all. As far as I know my parents left it as it was when she passed, and I haven’t been in there since then. It has to be done now though, if we hope to make any kind of headway. I look up to see Flint standing in front of me with a smile. “You all right?” he asks, and offers me a hand up.
“Of course, I’m fine,” I lie; trying to smile at him as he helps me to my feet. He looks like he might argue, but instead pulls me in for a quick hug and presses a kiss to my cheek. “Let’s go,” I say quietly and lead the way out of the library; Flint’s hand held tightly in mine.
My grandmother had a bedroom on the second floor that she shared with my grandfather before he died, but when her health started to deteriorate and the stairs became too much, my dad made the den on the first floor into a room for her so it would be easier for her to get around. I remember her telling me that the den reminded her of her childhood home in Ireland. She would get nostalgic once in a while and tell me stories about when she was growing up. Most of the time they ended with her crying, so I stopped asking her to tell them to me. I hated seeing her so sad, and whenever she thought of Ireland and her family there, a distinct air of melancholy would stay with her for days.
Flint and I make our way down the two flights of stairs to the ground floor and I draw in a deep breath when we reach the pocket doors that lead to the den. Flint squeezes my hand and I return the pressure before releasing his hand; pushing the doors apart and stepping forward into the room where I witnessed my grandmother’s death at the tender age of nine. Although the air smells a little musty, there is a faint scent of the rose water my grandmother liked to wear still present. I flip up the light switch on the wall and bring the room to life.
I take a glance around and try to hold in a shudder. Everything is exactly the same as it was that night. The overstuffed red sofa in front of the huge picture windows still has her pillow on one end with a chenille throw folded on top of it. The small bureau from the set that used to be in the second floor bedroom she shared with my grandfather is still against the wall, and her hair brush lies on the top with a hand mirror and some candles. The matching bed and dresser are in my room down the hall. There is a bookcase against the wall next to the sofa that holds some of her favorite books and a few scrapbooks she salvaged from Ireland.
Everywhere I turn, I see Gran as she was in life; warm and animated, telling stories and laughing at her grandchildren’s antics. I try my best to hold that image in my head. I’d been reading to her from Little Women that night, doing my best to keep her spirits up, and then suddenly she was gasping for air. It all happened so fast after that. I got her memory book for her and we looked though it together as she lay there, fighting to breathe. I try to remember the book with its pictures of family members I’ll never know. I did my best to ignore the wheezing sounds of her last breaths; the fear clutching at my heart as the life left her blue eyes, while holding onto her hand and begging her not to leave me. It is almost like it’s happening all over again and I feel my hands shaking; my heart stuttering in my chest as I remember the utter desolation that her absence brought to my world.
From far away I hear my name being said, and when I don’t respond there are warm hands on my face; thumbs stroking my cheeks. I blink, grab a breath and see Flint standing in front of me, concern in his eyes. “Breathe, Fi,” he says, sounding a little panicked. I grab onto his arm and shake my head a little, working on bringing air into my lungs. It takes a few moments but I’m able to get myself under control. When I’m breathing normally again, Flint takes hold of my hands. “Do you need to get out of here?” he asks.
I make myself snap out of it and shake my head. “No, no. I’m sorry.” I take a breath. “I just haven’t been in here since the night she died.”
He frowns and pushes a stray hair off my face. "Don't apologize... Are you sure you're okay? Lu and I could go through here if you want."
"No, that's alright...but thank you for the offer. It was just a shock, I think. I'm okay now," I say, trying to downplay the panic that was just racing through my system.
He doesn't look convinced but he nods and kisses my forehead anyway. "Are you ready to get started?" I nod and move to the closet in the corner of the room where I know there are more of Gran’s boxes.
I feel Flint shadowing me with his eyes and turn towards him. “I promise I’m okay now. I think there might be something here in the closet.”
Before I’m done speaking he’s in front of me; opening the closet and pulling the cord hanging from the ceiling to turn the light on in the small space. There are coats, blouses, slacks and skirts hanging from plastic hangers on a metal rod, and above them on a wooden shelf there are about five boxes stacked haphazardly. A full-length mirror is hanging from the back of the door and I see my reflection staring back at me. My eyes look huge and my face is even paler than normal. I look haunted. I turn away from the image in the mirror. That girl is not me. I do my best to tamp down the memories that surface everywhere I look.
Flint pulls down the boxes and puts them on the couch, turns to me with a smirk and asks, “So how many steamy novels do you think we’ll find in here?”
I grin and shake my head at him. “I’m not sure — maybe she hid her favorite ones in here for easier access.” He grins and we start looking through the boxes.
I hear the back door open and then my uncle calls out, “Anyone home?”
“In the den, Uncle Sea,” I yell back to him.
“What are you up to in here?” he asks as he looks around the musty room. He crosses to the dresser and picks up Gran’s hand mirror; stroking the handle tenderly. “She loved this. It was her mother’s, you know?” he says, looking at me with misty eyes.
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