Mirrored Images

by Michelle Larks

  Jeremiah sat inconspicuously near the back of the boarding area across from Melissa. He couldn’t bear Melissa leaving without seeing her one last time. Jeremiah knew he’d forfeited all rights after his marriage. So he had to be content with seeing her from afar. When he watched her approach the waiting area, Jeremiah wanted to run and scoop Melissa up in his arms and spirit her off to a place where they could talk and be together.

  Since marrying Moniqa, Jeremiah felt trapped. Her meaningless chatter drove him crazy. She acted like everything was well in their world. The thought of spending the rest of his life with her was more than he could endure. He camped out in the living room. It became his domain. He informed Moniqa he’d stay married to her long enough to ensure she wasn’t pregnant. Then sue her for divorce.

  Jeremiah’s legally wedded wife laughed in his face. What wounded him so was the face of the one he loved dearly. Moniqa’s face was so much like, and so different from Melissa’s. Moniqa would declare gloatingly, “I told you, you’re not going anywhere.”

  Bobo stood at the large paned glass window and took one last look at the plane as it began its ascent into the sky. As he left, he spied Jeremiah standing among the fringe of people across the aisle. He walked to his friend. “Hey, buddy, how about we have a drink or two?” They walked silently together out of the airport and planned to hit the local bar to drink, cry and mourn all Jeremiah had lost.

  Chapter Eighteen

  Six weeks after the wedding, Moniqa was in the tiny bathroom, eagerly unwrapping a home pregnancy test kit. Much to her chagrin, Jeremiah stubbornly refused her request to move from the apartment into a house. That she resided in the same space her husband and sister had once shared was a bitter pill for Moniqa to swallow.

  Jeremiah avoided coming home until the wee hours of the night. Memories of a sweet, little dimpled woman seemed to beckon him from every corner of the apartment.

  His grades slipped. For the first time since freshman year of high school, his GPA was not up to his usual standards. Jeremiah talked with his advisor, she suggested perhaps he needed to take a semester off to resolve his issues.

  Moniqa sat the test tube on the counter of the sink then returned to the living room and sat on the sofa. She clutched a blue, throw pillow tightly. Moniqa was aware Jeremiah loathed her. But oh well, he’d get over it soon. She knew the results would prove she was pregnant.

  When Jeremiah was home, he kept conversations to a minimum. Melissa would hear him stumble into the house in the wee hours of the morning. She’d tiptoe into the living room and hover over his prone body. Fumes of alcohol sprang from his body. The scent became unpleasant to her nostrils. Hearing Jeremiah murmured Mel or Melissa in his sleep drove Moniqa crazy. His tongue seemed to caress her name. Still, the situation didn’t phase Moniqa one bit. She would keep her eyes on the prize.

  She talked to her mother daily, complaining about Jeremiah’s denial of their martial situation. How he wouldn’t sleep with or touch her. Vanessa was chomping at the bit to come to Atlanta. Moniqa advised her to wait until after the pregnancy test results. She believed that once Jeremiah learned she was with child, he, along with his entire family, would come around.

  Moniqa sailed back into the bathroom. She picked up the test tube, it read positive. She pumped her fist into the air and shouted, “YES!” She ran to the telephone and called Vanessa to share her good news.

  Jeremiah, hung over from drinking beers all evening, let himself into the apartment. He walked unsteadily to the couch and lay down. He placed his left hand over his eyes and stretched out his long legs. Moniqa turned on the table lamp and stood over him. “How was your day honey?” she chirped.

  He glared at her, and turned to the back of the couch.

  “A bit testy aren’t we?” she asked as she sat on a chair across from him and folded her hands into a triangular shape.

  “Do you want something?” Jeremiah asked coldly. “If not I’d like to go to sleep.”

  “I have good news that I’d like to share with you.” Moniqa smiled. “We’re going to be parents.” She rubbed her flat stomach. “Isn’t that great?”

  Jeremiah lifted his eyebrow and squinted at her. “That remains to be seen as to whether you’re pregnant or not and more importantly, if I’m the father of your child.” His expression was blank as he shrugged.

  “Of course you’re the father.” She pulled the test tube out of her pocket and tossed it at him.

  Jeremiah caught it effortlessly. He peered carelessly at the tube and dropped it on the cocktail table. “What I’d really like you to do is leave until paternity can be established. So far you’ve done nothing I’ve asked of you. We’ll see after the baby is born who the father of that child really is.“ He reached over and turned the light off.

  Nevertheless, the noose had tightened around his neck, Moniqa thought.

  Moonlight filtered into the small room. Moniqa smiled at Jeremiah as she walked to the bedroom. “Whatever.”

  * * *

  Melissa came to love her adopted state of California. She later decided the hustle and bustle of Los Angeles was too much. When she laid eyes on a small cottage in Santa Monica, it was love at first sight. She remembered Nate driving home the point that land was always a good investment and decided to purchase the property.

  Decorating her new residence took her mind off Jeremiah some of the time. Then at other times, she was overtaken by inconsolable grief at what might have been. At Brenda’s recommendation she hired painters and the house was transformed over a weekend.

  The living room walls were painted a light blue pastel color. She bought white, wicker furniture with navy-blue and white padding and throw pillows. Blue and white area rugs were placed strategically on the floor.

  Her bedroom walls and the spare one were painted eggshell white. Ocean-blue bedding and accessories were her choice for her bedroom. The spare room was accessorized in red. The kitchen was painted pale gold and she purchased white appliances.

  She enrolled at UCLA, deciding to use the time to further her education and get a master’s degree in journalism. She hoped to secure a position with CNN after her marriage to Jeremiah. Now she had to seriously re-think her future alone. Nancy would return to the west coast for the Thanksgiving holiday and stay through Christmas. Bobo, his parents, and Connie would also journey to California for the yuletide holiday. Then Nancy would return in February for the baby’s birth.

  Melissa’s stomach ballooned gracefully as her pregnancy advanced. She was in her fifth month. The ties that bound Vanessa, Moniqa and Melissa had been quietly severed. Bobo managed to travel to California at least once a month. He kept his cousin abreast of the family happenings after Nancy had distanced herself from Vanessa and Moniqa. Learning her twin sister was pregnant and scheduled to deliver a few months after her was a crushing blow for Melissa.

  With nothing but time on her hands, Melissa ruminated on the past. She took long walks along the Pacific coastline basking in the healing sunlight. Her skin tanned a honey color. The sun streaked her curly hair. If she wasn’t walking, she sat in a black and white striped lounging chair along the beach and read. She wrote feverishly like an author in the journal Connie had given her.

  Her reflections of the past were disheartening at times. For as long as she’d remembered, Vanessa treated her differently from Moniqa. It was like her mother had placed Moniqa on a pedestal and nothing she did caused her to topple from it.

  Had it not been for Nate and Nancy, Melissa knew she probably would have wound up bouncing off the walls in a mental institution. She had to admit for every slight she received from Vanessa, Nate had showered her with love and affection. There had been times when Vanessa would go on a shopping spree and return home with many outfits for Moniqa and nothing for Melissa. If Nate called her out on her actions, she’d simply pooh-pooh his complaints and reply that Melissa wasn’t into clothing anyway.

  Nate had tried not to show favoritism among his daughters but after the
battle lines were drawn between he and Vanessa and she became bolder in her nepotism, he had no choice but to give Melissa extra time. He’d never considered how his actions would affect Moniqa and had referred to his youngest child as Vanessa’s little clone, albeit in a kind, gentle manner.

  When Melissa began taking piano lessons at six years old, Nate made it a priority to attend her recitals most of the time. She attended church with him Sunday mornings and was the backup pianist for the children’s choir. As far back as Melissa could remember, Nate had always been there for her. Although a self-made millionaire, he’d preferred the simple life and pleasures. He was just as enthusiastic about taking Melissa to Baskin Robbins after her recitals as dining at five-star restaurants with Vanessa.

  Melissa’s thoughts would eventually fall on Jeremiah, conceding that he probably didn’t know what hit him when Moniqa blew in.

  She’d rub her belly from time and time and smile, often calling Nancy with questions regarding Nate. Nancy would do her best to accommodate her queries.

  As time elapsed, and the questions from her grandchild increased, Nancy vacillated between bouts of guilt and anger at her son for allowing his home to become such a dysfunctional one.

  Melissa made peace with her decision to give away the baby. She informed her doctor that she didn’t want to know the sex of the child following an ultra sound test. She explained, her only concern was the child’s health.

  Melissa, after spending time with Brenda’s daughter Nina and her husband Jacob, surmised the Cooke’s would make excellent parents for her child. Melissa’s only request was that the child be named Adam if the baby was a boy and Michaela Jerique if a girl.

  Brenda and Nina visited Melissa on a weekly basis at Nancy’s behest. Melissa had come to know and grow fond of her cousins and was content with her choice.

  Her decision to give the child away hadn’t come lightly or frivolously. Many times she’d had to stop herself from dialing Jeremiah’s telephone number and informing him about the baby but she knew doing so would only complicate matters.

  As the child stirred in her womb, she talked and sang to it. Melissa even ate vegetables which she detested. She told her unborn child, that she didn’t want to give he/she to Cousin Nina and how she felt she was doing the right thing for everyone concerned.

  Melissa planned to present the couple with notarized documents designating them as the child’s legal guardians and planned to give the baby the Cooke’s last name.

  Chapter Nineteen

  Vanessa, chomping at the bit to see her daughter, journeyed to Atlanta to spend the Christmas holidays with the Jeffries family. When she arrived with many pieces of luggage and gifts in tow, she found the newlyweds in a state of siege.

  After his mother-in-law’s arrival, Jeremiah decided to spend the holidays with his family. He didn’t bother to tell Moniqa of his decision.

  Vanessa was steaming after she got of the phone with a complaining Moniqa. She hopped into her rented car and drove to the Jeffries apartment to help Moniqa pack an overnight bag. The two stayed at a suite at the Marriott Hotel. The Ross’ and Valerie planned to join them on Christmas Day.

  Vanessa and Moniqa spent the remainder of the day shopping, then dined in the hotel restaurant. Afterward they returned to the suite where they talked into the wee hours of the night.

  “I think you should rent a house in the suburbs until Jeremiah comes around,” Vanessa announced after calling room service to order ice-cream for Moniqa.

  “Mother,” Moniqa said, exasperated. She fidgeted trying to find a comfortable position in the bed. “Let me handle my husband please. I plan to stay with Jeremiah in that tiny apartment until the baby is born.” Her nose shot upward, as she said “tiny apartment”. “Jeremiah may be playing hardball now. But when he sees his son, he’ll be mine.” She’d had an ultrasound last week and the results were that the baby was a boy.

  “There is not a man alive, especially one of Jeremiah’s character, who can resist his son.” Moniqa hand drifted down and stroked her belly. Then she fluffed the pillow and put it behind her back. “How long is it going to take before they bring my ice-cream?”

  “Room service should be here soon,” Vanessa responded. “I hope you know what you’re doing as far as Jeremiah is concerned. Your father and I had our ups and down, still, he didn’t leave the house without telling me where he was going.”

  “Mom, save it.” Moniqa rolled her eyes and waved her hand impatiently. “You think I didn’t know how messed up your marriage was? Maybe he respected you at the beginning of your marriage but the end was a different story. Unlike me it’s not like you tricked him to marry you anyway.”

  Vanessa flushed and looked away. She walked to the chair and sat nervously crossing and uncrossing her legs. “Hmm, I guess you’re right.” She looked down at the door. “I wonder what is keeping room service?”

  There was a knock at the door. Vanessa tipped the waiter five dollars.

  She looked amused as Moniqa scraped the bottom of the bowl with a content look on her face. Vanessa walked to the television and changed the channel to a new station.

  Moniqa laid the bowl on the nightstand then turned on her side and stretched her legs.

  “You can always come home have the baby at the University of Chicago Lying-In Hospital,” Vanessa suggested pensively.”

  “Mother, I said I’d think about it,” Moniqa complained and yawned. “I’m tired. Can we continue this conversation in the morning?”

  “Sure,” Vanessa said. “I’ll be in the other bedroom if you need me. Good night.”

  Chapter Twenty

  Nancy, Connie and Bobo spent the Christmas holidays with Melissa in sunny California. Melissa felt a nostalgic longing for the traditional white Christmases of the Midwest. She overflowed with child and looked as though she’d burst any moment. Her due date being January 27th, 1998. Nancy prepared a mouth-watering turkey dinner with all the trimmings. The cottage was full of holiday gaiety.

  * * *

  At 2:00 am on January 28th, her waters burst. Melissa longed for Jeremiah as she clung onto the car door handle. Nancy burned rubber as she pulled into the emergency entrance, flying from the car to get someone to assist Melissa.

  Melissa breathed heavily as a hospital aide hurriedly wheeled her into a birth room. The narrow cubicle would become her home as she prepared for the birth of Baby Cooke. Nancy left Melissa in the nursing staff’s capable hands, and called Bobo with the news. He immediately booked a flight to California.

  As hours elapsed, Melissa’s labor became progressively painful, still, she refused anesthesia. Her face was flushed and sweaty. Pinpoints of her hair curled in every direction from her head. The hospital gown became wrinkled and bloody as she struggled to bring her child into the world.

  Finally, after an eternity, Dr. Cobb announced she’d dilated ten centimeters and could now push.

  Bobo arrived at the hospital and paced the floor of the waiting room as if he were the father. He seemed to wear a path on the carpeting and finally sat in a seat. While he waited, Bobo was torn between wanting to call his friend, and his promise to Melissa that he wasn’t to contact Jeremiah under any circumstances. He sighed audibly, knowing if something happened to Mel or the baby, J would never forgive him.

  Bobo jumped from his seat as he caught sight of Nancy walking briskly toward him with a broad grin on her face. He stood anxiously and walked to her. “Did she have the baby yet? What did she have?”

  “A six-pound ten-ounce baby girl,” Nancy answered. They hugged. “My God, I’m a great-grandmother.”

  “Are they okay?” Bobo asked apprehensively as they walked to Melissa’s room.

  “She’s exhausted, but fine,” Nancy answered, pushing the door open.

  Bobo gasped. His smile was wider than the Pacific Ocean at the sight of his new cousin, Michaela. The nurse helped him slip into a gown. Melissa looked tired lying against the pillow, the baby nestled in her arms. He walked to the
bed and held out his hands. Melissa handed over the squirming infant.

  Bobo looked down at the baby’s gaping mouth and the tiny fingers delicately pointed upward. He couldn’t resist smoothing a lock of downy hair on her head. She peeked at him with one eye, then yawned and fell asleep.

  “She looks like you and Jeremiah,” Bobo proclaimed as he lifted her tiny finger.

  Melissa patted her hair into place as she lay against the pillows. Nancy beamed at the sight of her granddaughter and great-granddaughter. Bobo retuned the baby to her mother.

  “You done good, cuz,” he teased her. “Say, I’m going to the flower shop and call Connie. I’ll be back.”

  “Nana, would you put Michaela back into her crib?” Melissa asked. She put her hand over her mouth trying to stifle a yawn and winced as she turned in the bed to pull her gown down over her thighs. Her eyes strayed to the baby then filled with tears.

  “It’s not going to be as easy as you think? Is it?” Nancy asked.

  Melissa brushed away a tear from the corner of her eye. “As usual you are right,” Melissa conceded ruefully. “Still I feel my decision is best for all of us in the long run. Did you call Nina and Jacob?” Her eyes closed droopily.

  “They should be here in about an hour. Brenda is coming with them. Why don’t you get some rest?” Nancy urged. “We have plenty of time to iron out all the details.”

  Two weeks later, Melissa setup an account for Michaela. She signed a document naming Nina and Jacob as legal guardians of her child.

  * * *

  Moniqa gave birth to Jeremiah Jeffries III a month to the day that Michaela was born.

  Jeremiah stoically refused to share in the birth process with Moniqa, instead he sat in the labor room with his parents. Then stood and impatiently walked to the window on the other side of the room. His thoughts were of Melissa as always. He wondered, as he did most of his waking days, what she was doing at that minute.