After The Break

by Andrea Joan

  “You want to know who you have on your side, in your corner, Skylar? The guy you hired to watch after you and I’m guessing let fuck you, especially if you’re anything like your mother.”

  “Don’t.” Liam warns in a tone I’ve never heard before and I’m not sure if it’s more for me or him.

  Gauging by the smarmy smile on Carl’s face, I guess I have my answer; it’s more for his. “Has your little bodyguard told you that he put someone in a coma once?”

  No.

  “Did he tell you that he was involved with gang members that murdered people close to him?”

  Oh god.

  “Did he happen to mention to you, I don’t know, maybe during some pillow talk, that he’s also a murderer?”

  Murderer.

  Liam murdered someone? That can’t possibly be true. It has to be a lie, just another manipulative tactic Carl is using to distract me from firing him and to turn me against Liam instead. But Liam remains silent, saying nothing to deny the allegations, and when I look at his face, it’s completely void of any emotion or indication that this is all bullshit. It doesn’t make him guilty, though; he was just accused of murder, and while I know something bad happened to Liam in his past, I know he’s not a murderer. If he won’t speak up for himself, I will.

  “I don’t believe you, and it changes nothing. Liam could have killed ten people and I would still be firing you.” I don’t miss Liam’s wince, causing a tiny amount of doubt to creep in. “He has nothing to do with my decision. I’m done letting you take my choices from me. You were always a shitty father, but you made for an even shittier manager, which I must say is pretty impressive. You think I would be nowhere without you, Carl? You might be right. But I would rather be a nobody living on the streets than to have to spend one more day under your control, paying you money I earn, money that I sacrifice my life and privacy for. You have been nothing but a cancer in my life, and lucky for me, you can be easily eradicated. Get the hell out of my house.”

  Now this is the reaction I’ve been waiting for. His face is starting to turn red, his nostrils flaring ever so slightly, his hands fisted by his sides as his cold eyes glare into mine. He steps forward, but Liam makes sure to move in front of me.

  “I wouldn’t if I were you,” Liam warns.

  “Don’t worry, boy. I’m heading toward the door like Skylar wants. If she wants to ignore my warning about you, that’s on her. You know, you two really do make a fitting couple. You’re both excellent at hiding secrets. Isn’t that right, Skylar? You haven’t told him, have you?”

  “Get out now!” I yell before he has a chance to say anything else.

  Liam can’t know. Not like this, not now, and not from Carl who will spin everything in a way that will have Liam hating me. I know Carl will keep his mouth shut if he still thinks he has a chance to weasel his way back into my life, and if this secret gets out it will destroy me and him in the process.

  “With pleasure. This isn’t over, Skylar. You and I both know that, so enjoy my absence while it lasts.” He makes his way toward the front door, making sure to shove into Liam’s shoulder on his way out.

  When the door finally slams shut I walk over to the kitchen counter, bracing my hands on the edge. With my head down, I draw in deep breaths, trying to slow my racing heart. I’d almost lost everything. Just when I thought Carl couldn’t get any crueler, he teases me with the threat of how terrible he can really make things for me. The red color of the folder catches the corner of my eye and I’m hit with another wave of anxiety. I have no idea what information it contains, but I know whatever it is may have the power to ruin us, and I can’t handle that right now.

  Liam’s hand begins to stroke my back softly. “Sky, you need to breathe.”

  That’s easier said than done. Moving out from under his touch, I step away. “Liam, I can’t do this right now. I can’t handle any of this. Can you go? Please, can you just go to the pool house? I need time.”

  A mixture of confusion and defeat crosses his otherwise gorgeous face, and I want nothing more than to kiss him and assure him everything will be okay, but I can’t find the strength. His head drops, then he nods slightly as he heads to the back door. Before he opens it, he calls my name. When I turn to look, his back is to me, his head turned slightly so all I can see is his profile.

  “Yeah?”

  “Don’t open that folder. For me, okay? Let me be the one to tell you when you’re ready.”

  Without waiting for my reply, he exits out the back and heads to the pool house. I grab the folder off the counter and throw it into the trash before heading up to my room where I can cry for us both.

  THERE’S A LIGHT TAPPING on my bedroom window and I can’t help but laugh and shake my head. Ali loves to sneak in at night even though it’s completely unnecessary and ridiculous. Mom and dad have no problem with her coming over at any time; she could easily knock on the door and they would welcome her in, but no. At night she insists on sneaking in through the window, says that makes it more romantic. So I always keep a small crate I brought home from the bar outside to make sure she can reach the window easily and tap away until her heart’s content.

  Some nights I like to play around with her. Like tonight, where I let her tap on the window for over a minute, trying to hide my laugh as she knocks a little louder and starts to whisper my name. She is so fucking cute sometimes.

  “Liam, are you there?”

  I finally give in, pulling back the curtains and opening my bedroom window. Her fucking smile when she sees me brightens up the night sky around her.

  “What can I do for you, angel?” I’ve always called her angel because that’s what she is. My fucking angel, so good and pure that whenever I get my hands on her I feel like I’m in danger of corrupting her a little, but I don’t fucking care because I love her, and when bathed in her light I feel worthy.

  “I need my secret weapon,” she whispers coyly, biting her lower lip.

  As much as I wish she was talking about my dick, I know that’s not the case. “Tonight? And here I thought you were sneaking in to take advantage of me.”

  “You wish.”

  “You have no idea how much.”

  “Come on, Liam, it’s perfect out right now. So clear we’ll be able to see all the stars.” With her lip all pouty, her blonde hair shining in the light of the moon, and those damn cupcake pajama pants on, how can I turn her down?

  “All right, all right, I’m coming,”

  I start to close the window but she says, “Wait, what are you doing?”

  “What do you think I’m doing? I’m going to come out there just like you asked.”

  “Just crawl through the window,” she says, rolling her eyes at me like I’m being the ridiculous one.

  “You are a weird one angel. You know that, right?” I snatch a blanket off my bed and grab the windowsill, pulling myself out easily. The second I’m upright, I waste no time in pulling her to me, lifting her off the ground and kissing the shit out of her. Ali throws her arms around my neck, taking everything I have to give.

  “Well, it’s nice to see you too,” she says. Even in the dark I can see the blush that stains her cheeks. I smile down at her and kiss her forehead before tugging the zipper on her pink hoodie all the way up to her neck and throwing the hood over her head. It may be summer, but the beach here always seems to be chilly at night no matter the season.

  “Wouldn’t want you getting sick before our trip to Atlanta, baby.”

  “Me? Never,” she says and grabs my hand. “Come on. We’re wasting precious time.”

  It’s only ten, not even that late, but I don’t bother arguing with her, I just let her drag me the short distance to our hammock. I climb in first, making sure it’s steady before Ali drops in next to me.

  When I first put the hammock up, there were a few mishaps, and by mishaps I mean crashes to the ground. Believe it or not, hammocks are fucking hard to master with two people. Ali and I spent more time on the
ground the first few tries than in the actual hammock, laughing so hard that we could barely get off the ground to try again. But we mastered it and are now lying comfortably together, swaying back and forth with the breeze coming in from the ocean, staring at the stars.

  “So.” Her sweet melodic voice softly grazes my ear “Which one were we on?”

  I point up to the sky, trying as best I can to show her the last star we left off at. “We were at Peacock, baby,” I tell her, throwing the blanket over us.

  “Ah yes. Peacock. Number nine zero six. Such a bizarre name for a star, don’t you think?”

  “No more bizarre than the idea we can count every visible star in the sky together,” I chuckle, tightening my arm around her to bring her closer.

  “Hey, that’s not bizarre! You heard what Mr. Bond said.” Mr. Bond was our Astronomy teacher in high school. Ali was obsessed with Astronomy and I was obsessed with Ali so I made it my mission to pay close attention and remember everything that was taught to us in that class. I even studied star maps just to be able to impress her with my knowledge. At the time she had no idea I had a photographic memory, so when I took her on our first date I was able to really impress her with my knowledge of the constellations. Once we started getting serious, though, Trevor outed me and Ali found out the truth. I thought she would be pissed, but instead she told me that she loved me. It shocked the shit out of me, but I fucking loved her first so I couldn’t have been happier with her admission.

  “No one really knows how many visible stars can be seen with the naked eye because no one has tried to count them all. It could be anywhere between five and ten thousand. With your gift and my dedication, I’m positive we can figure this out together. And who knows, maybe we can even become famous for it. They could name a star after us as a reward.” She winks at me before placing a chaste kiss on my cheek, and I swear I can see the stars sparkling right through her brown eyes.

  “You know you can just pay to have a star named after you, right? You want that, I’ll make it happen.”

  “It’s not the same though,” she says. “Are you nervous for the fight next week?”

  “Nervous? Come on now, angel. You know I’m undefeated. No one can touch me.”

  “Be serious, Liam. You’ve been practicing harder than normal these last few months, studying those fight tapes like it’s your religion. I know this one is something different for you.”

  Sometimes I forget how well Ali knows me. It can be unnerving, but there’s also something soothing about it. Maybe because I don’t have to pretend with her.

  “Yeah, there is something different with this one.”

  “What is it?”

  “Darius Tate is a different type of boxer than I’ve fought before.”

  “How so?”

  “He has more to lose and a shit ton to gain if he beats me. He’s trying to make it out of the shitty part of the city he lives in. Working hard so he stays out of the gang life, unlike his brother who’s heavily into it. So when Darius fights, he’s more wild and unpredictable. He can switch from fighting with his head to demolishing with his heart in seconds. I can’t track his movements as easy as the others I’ve fought.”

  There are a few moments of silence, where all I can hear are the waves crashing against the beach and Ali’s soft breathing.

  “If that’s all it is, then you got this,” she says, sneaking her hand under my shirt so her skin is on mine.

  I reach down to adjust my jeans because the simplest touch from her always causes my cock to start paying attention. After I make myself more comfortable, I put my hand on top of hers.

  “And what makes you so confident? I mean, other than the fact that you’re totally aware of, and have accepted, my overall awesomeness in all things.”

  She giggles and my dick gets harder. We haven’t tried it yet, but I’m pretty sure I can fuck her in this hammock. “Because he’s just like you. That’s how you fight. In all aspects of your life. Try not to overthink this one, Liam. Use your natural instincts. Trust them and you’ll beat Darius.”

  God, I love her so fucking much.

  We swing back and forth, counting the stars, and I tell her their names as I remember them from the maps. We make it to 941 before her eyes start to droop and she begins to nod off. I’m not far behind. This memory thing with the star maps wears me out mentally sometimes, but I wouldn’t trade these nights for anything. Ali is worth it.

  “Come on, babe. Let me take you to bed.”

  “No. No way. I’m awake, I swear. We have to make it to a thousand.”

  “Ali, we can do it when we get back in a few weeks. Gives us something to look forward to, yeah?”

  She yawns big. “Yeah, okay. But can we sleep out here tonight? It’s nice out and I don’t want to move,” she says, burrowing in closer to my chest.

  “Sure,” I concede, because honestly I’m quite content here too. “I love you, Ali.”

  “I love you, too.”

  “Oh yeah? More than the stars?”

  “More than anything.” She kisses my chest before closing her eyes. I almost think she’s fallen completely asleep when she says, “Hey, Liam?”

  “Yeah?”

  “How long do you think it will take us to count them all?”

  “I don’t know. A long fucking time probably,” I tell her as my own eyes become heavy with the promise of sleep.

  “Then it’s probably good we’ll have each other for a long fucking time, isn’t it?”

  I laugh when she curses because it sounds so foreign and cute coming from her innocent lips. I kiss the top of her head. “It’s definitely good. Better than good. Fucking amazing. Now go to sleep, angel.”

  Her breathing starts to even out quickly, and I know she’s out.

  I just wish I had stayed up like she wanted so we could have at the very fucking least made it to the thousandth star.

  “What are you doing out here?” Sky’s voice draws me out of my bittersweet memory, the one that has haunted me for fucking years.

  “Looking at the stars.” I take a long pull from my beer, leaning back a little further in the lounge chair. Seeing as she’s probably about to leave my ass I may as well get comfortable, and hopefully drunk too. At least if Skylar is about to dump me she’ll look fucking hot doing it; something about her in tiny cotton shorts and a tight tank top always seems to make me instantly hard.

  She sits at the foot of my lounge chair, steals the beer right out of my hand, and takes a long pull. “This is L.A. You can’t see the stars here. Kind of ironic if you think about it.”

  Tapping my head, I tell her, “Trust me, sweetheart. I can see them all up here.” I contemplate reaching over, grabbing her around the waist, and pulling her to me so I can have just a few seconds of peace before she tears me apart, but I know now is not the time.

  “I didn’t read the file, Liam.”

  Now I kind of wished I’d told her to read it so I don’t have to relive this fucking nightmare. “Good for you. Shocked to see that you listened to me for once,” I snap on reflex. I’m being an asshole. I don’t want to be, but self-preservation seems to be forcing that tactic out of me.

  “That’s not fair and you know it. Don’t do that.”

  “Do what?”

  “Be a dick to me so that I run and you don’t have to tell me what happened. I gave you an out in the car before Carl showed up, before he spewed his venom all over us, and you told me that’s not how relationships work. You were right.”

  I turn and grab another beer from the six-pack next to me. She reaches over and grabs my face so that I’m forced to look at her. “Hey. I said you were right. I want this relationship to work, so don’t pretend with me. I want to know your reality, Liam.”

  I’ve never thought to compare Ali and Skylar. They’re both so different that it never even occurred to me. But the one thing they seem to have in common is an ability to read me, and that may be the only explanation I need as to why I’m falling for
someone so different than the one who came before.

  “I’m sorry. Shit, I’m sorry, Sky.” This time I reach over and bring her closer to me, burying my face into the crook of her neck, breathing in her sweet scent and hoping it calms me just enough to get through this. “It’s not what you think.”

  “Liam, I know. I know you’re not a murderer. I’m well aware of how Carl works. I just needed to take a break from everything, not just you. I’m sorry if I made you think otherwise.”

  “I was never convicted of murder.” She shivers slightly when I speak, goosebumps spreading across her neck.

  “I never thought you were. Liam, I know you could never kill someone.” She starts running her fingers through my hair in a reassuring gesture that doesn’t go unnoticed but is entirely undeserved.

  My eyes squeeze shut and I swallow hard. “No, Skylar. I was never convicted of murder, but that doesn’t mean I didn’t kill someone.”

  Skylar stills, and the hand stroking my hair halts before disappearing altogether. When I dare to finally look up, confusion is plastered all over her perfect face. “I don’t understand. You killed someone?”

  If what I’m about to tell her wasn’t so fucked up, I would take a few extra moments to appreciate how fucking adorable she looks with her brow slightly furrowed and her nose scrunched up.

  “Liam, are you telling me you killed someone?” She starts to scoot back, putting space between us, but I grab the back of her neck to stop her. I can’t let her leave before I have a chance to explain.

  “Liam, let go of me.”

  “No.” She tries to pull away again, but I’m stronger. Placing my forehead against hers, I look directly into her eyes. “Promise me you’ll let me explain first. If I let you go, swear to me you won’t fucking run. Please. Just trust me,” I plead.

  Indecision has never appeared more evident, and as the seconds tick by and the pulse in her neck speeds up against my fingers, I begin to lose confidence that she will stay. I close my eyes, readying myself to release the hold I have on her neck to let her walk away, but then I feel her nod against me.