Winter Winds

by Gayle Roper

  When Randy and his friend Sam showed up late Tuesday afternoon with Dori’s car full of her clothes, treasures, plants, and most important, Trudy, Dori was still not willing to admit her growing compulsion to work at Harbor Lights. She was only too happy to dwell on her dog and her things, familiar and comfortable in a way her new life wasn’t.

  “You’ll stay for dinner, won’t you?” she asked Randy and Sam who, all bleary-eyed and bristly jawed, looked like they had driven straight through from California.

  “Can’t,” Randy said. “We want to get to New York today so we can get a decent night’s sleep before the new job tomorrow.” He gave her a kiss on the cheek. “Thanks though. I’m just sorry I don’t have time to wait and meet the husband. Mom’s dying to know what he’s like.”

  Dori stood in the living room with Trudy dancing around her feet. “I’m sorry you won’t get to meet him too. You’d like him and Ryan.”

  “Who’s Ryan?”

  “A kid from Trev’s church who’s living with him—with us—while his grandmother’s in rehab for a bad fall.”

  Randy grinned. “You’ve got a kid living with you? How old?”

  “Thirteen.”

  Randy started to laugh. “Only you, Dor,” he said setting the last box of her things down. “A husband you haven’t seen for six years and a thirteen-year-old in residence to watch the reunion.”

  “It’s not that funny” Dori said as his hoots filled the room, but she had to laugh too. How had her life become such a soap opera?

  She followed Randy out to the car, snuggling Trudy under her black coat, the dog’s fluffy head peeking out under Dori’s chin. As she nuzzled Trudy’s ear, a school bus stopped at the end of the street, and a slight figure in an oversized Eagles coat climbed off.

  “Ryan?” Randy asked.

  “Ryan,” Dori confirmed. She waved. Ryan didn’t wave back.

  When he got closer, she could see his glasses weren’t sitting on his nose right. When he reached her, she saw one bow was missing. From his stormy face, the story of what happened wasn’t good.

  “What’s that?” Ryan asked abruptly as he eyed Trudy, all fluffy light topknot and panting pink tongue.

  “This is Trudy.” At her name, Trudy turned and kissed Dori under the chin.

  “What is she?”

  “She’s a Dandie Dinmont terrier.”

  Ryan frowned. “What does Jack think of her?”

  “Jack hasn’t met her yet. I put him in your bedroom for the time being.”

  “He’ll eat her for lunch.” His tone said it was nothing less than the little puffball deserved.

  Trudy leaned toward Ryan, her little feet scrambling for traction inside Dori’s coat. She managed to climb out, teetering for a moment on the V of Dori’s coat. Then she launched herself at Ryan. She hit the front of his slick coat, surprising him completely, and began a quick slide to the ground. Dori made a little yelp and reached for the dog, but Ryan was faster. He grabbed Trudy just as she slid off the bottom of the coat and, pulling her to him, cradled her in his arms.

  Trudy reacted with a happy little bark and a dainty slurp of a kiss. Just like that Ryan was smitten. He slipped her inside his coat and held her close while they said good-bye to Randy and Sam.

  Just before he climbed into the driver’s seat of Dori’s rental, which he was going to return in New York, Randy took Dori by the arms and looked at her with concern. “Are you okay, Dor? Are you going to be happy?”

  “Of course she’s happy,” Ryan answered for her, and she was glad. She didn’t know what her true answer was. “She lives with two great guys, and she’s running my grandmother’s bookstore.”

  Randy brightened. “You got a job?” For some reason Dori couldn’t fathom, that seemed to satisfy him about her welfare. It must be that jobs were some kind of guy sign of happiness. At any rate, he pulled her into his arms for an exuberant hug, gave her a kiss on her cheek which she returned, climbed in the car, and drove off, leaving her waving on the curb.

  She turned to see Ryan and Trudy frowning at her. “What?”

  “He kissed you,” Ry accused. “And you kissed him back.”

  “He’s an old friend.” She held out her arms to Trudy who came only after bathing Ryan’s face and sending his glasses flying. “Friends sometimes kiss good-bye.”

  Ryan bent and picked up his glasses. “Well, I won’t tell Pastor Paul if you work at the bookstore.”

  “That, sir, is called blackmail.” She buried her face in Trudy’s soft fur. “Come on. Let’s get you something to eat and drink.”

  “Who are you talking to?” Ryan demanded. “Me or the dog?”

  “Are you hungry or thirsty?” she asked.

  He nodded.

  “Then I’m talking to you.”

  She led the way inside and to the kitchen, which smelled strongly of pot roast overlaid with brownies. Ryan let his coat slip to the floor and dropped into a chair at the table. Dori cut a large piece of the brownies and put it and a glass of cold milk on the table.

  “Enjoy.” She sat at the table across from him. He shot her an angry look, then proceeded to inhale the food and drink. When he finished he swiped the back of his hand across his mouth and slouched in the chair. Dori swallowed the urge to say, “Ever heard of napkins?”

  “You must have had a very bad day,” she said instead, taking her clue from the fact that he hadn’t bolted from the room. He wanted to talk.

  He glowered at her, then pulled off his glasses and held them out. “Eric Jankowski.”

  The crime boss’s son. “He broke your glasses?”

  “Grabbed them right off my nose, dropped them on the floor, and stepped on them.”

  “Oh, Ryan.” Humiliation was hard to take at any age, but especially at thirteen. She cast around for something, anything she could think of that would help him feel good again. “Why?”

  “Bullies don’t need reasons.” He looked at her with a faint smile. “But he did have one this time.”

  This time. Dori’s heart contracted, and she turned away so he wouldn’t see the pity in her eyes. How could she help him feel better about himself? The kid was such a wonderful, funny, smart guy, but he didn’t realize it. She remembered all the encouragement Pop and Honey had given her and how it had helped her through the dark days of junior high. Certainly there was something she could do for Ryan. Her glance rested on the weight bench in the dining room. Ca-ching!

  “In gym I made a last minute basket that made his team lose.” There was pride in his voice.

  Dori laughed and high-fived him. “Way to go, Ryan. I didn’t know basketball was your game.”

  “It isn’t. Nothing’s my game. I hate team sports, even though Pastor Paul and I shoot baskets over at the park on Thirty-fourth Street sometimes.” He snorted. “Today was luck, pure and simple. I was only playing for the last five minutes of the game because Mr. Kline makes everyone play. Eric was guarding me, which is sort of like Goliath guarding David. He was bumping me, elbowing me, and I knew he was just waiting for Mr. Kline to look away before administering real pain.”

  He made a face. “I don’t like pain. I threw the ball in a panic before he could get me. When it went through the hoop, I knew I was dead.”

  Dori held out her hand for the glasses. “Let me see. Maybe I can fix it with a toothpick to hold things together. You do have the broken bow, don’t you?”

  Ryan reached in his pocket and pulled it out. “A toothpick won’t do it. It didn’t just come apart at the hinge. He actually broke the hinge. The only good thing is that I think he wanted to break the lenses. He was getting ready to stomp again when Mr. Kline walked over.”

  Dori looked at the unrepairable glasses. “Is your optometrist nearby?”

  “Just off island.”

  “We’ll make arrangements to run over tomorrow.”

  He sighed. “You know, between Grandmom and Eric, this is turning out to be the worst year of my life.”

  Been ther
e, kiddo. I know all about worst years. “I talked to your grandmother today. She’s a nice lady. Funny.”

  Ryan didn’t even react.

  “She told me all about the store.”

  He turned toward her, his face still downcast, but she thought she saw a spark of interest in his eyes.

  Forcing a smile, Dori spoke the inevitable. “I’m going in tomorrow morning to see what I can do to help her out.”

  Ryan turned away quickly, but not before she saw the tears he wanted to hide. “Thanks,” he said, his voice thick. “I have to go change.” He grabbed his backpack and started for the stairs.

  “Before you go, I’ve got a question for you.”

  He didn’t look at her, but he also didn’t run from the room.

  “Do you know how to use the weights in the dining room?”

  “Dining room? That’s the weight room. Just ask Pastor Paul.” He turned. “Sure I do. He’s been coaching me.”

  “Is it hard?”

  He looked at her, and she knew she’d asked a girl question. He raised his hands over his head, his fists closed around an imaginary bar. “You just lift what you can.”

  “Do you enjoy it?”

  “Yeah, sort of. It’s not a team sport, so there are no Erics to make my life miserable. I only compete against myself.”

  Dori followed him to the doorway where they both stood looking at the bench, the bar, and all the weighted disks.

  “Show me, then help me?” Dori asked.

  “You want to lift weights?” Ryan looked disbelieving.

  “Don’t you dare do that girls-keep-house and boys-lift-weights thing, kiddo.”

  “Nah, I know girls lift weights. I just didn’t know you wanted to look like the babes in the weight magazines with muscles all over.”

  “You don’t go for that look?” she asked as he took off one of the large disks and managed to keep it from slamming to the floor. He rolled it aside and replaced it with a much smaller one. He did the same on the other side. Then he lay on his back and slid under the bar, which rested on supports several inches above him. He wrapped his hands tightly around the bar and lifted. He raised and lowered the weights several times. Dori noticed that his arms were beginning to shake.

  “Now let me try,” she ordered.

  The bar clanged into its resting spot, and Ryan slid out from under. Dori lay on the bench and positioned herself under the bar. She clutched it.

  “Wait!” Ryan positioned both her and her hands. “If you’re not positioned right or if your hands are too close together, you’ll hurt yourself and lose lifting power.”

  “Gotcha,” Dori said. “So I’m good to go now?”

  He nodded.

  “You’re a good coach.”

  He looked at her with one raised eyebrow. Whoops. Mustn’t lay it on too thick. The kid was too smart to fall for overblown flattery. Grinning at him, she pushed the weights up, surprised at how heavy they felt for how little they looked. No wonder she couldn’t move the big ones when she tried the other day. She began to perspire, and her bangs stuck to her forehead.

  “You know, girls don’t have the upper body strength of boys.”

  “So I’ve heard.” And after this little exercise, she believed it. “Thanks for the encouragement.” She forced herself to concentrate and lifted the bar again.

  “Come on, Dori.” Ryan clapped his hands. “You can do it. Just straighten those elbows!” He clapped again. “In case you don’t realize it, I’m encouraging you.”

  “These things are heavy!”

  “That’s the whole idea,” he said, making a strange gurgling sound. “That’s why they’re called weights.”

  “Are you laughing at me?” she asked as she let the bar clang home. She looked at him and was delighted to see a huge grin at her expense. Grunting, she forced the weights up again. Her arms were beginning to shake.

  “I’d never laugh at you,” he said and began to laugh.

  She let the bar crash home again and glared at him.

  “I’m not laughing at you,” Ryan choked out. “It’s him. You should see his expression!”

  Dori twisted and saw Trev standing in the other doorway, amazement writ large across his face. At that moment Trudy, who had been pacing in agitation at this new and unnerving activity in this new and unnerving place, rushed to her, jumped onto the bench, and climbed onto her chest, stepping on all Dori’s tender places in the process. She began to lick Dori’s wet face.

  “That’s Trudy,” Ryan informed Trev. “She likes me.”

  “She’s a beige powder puff with no legs,” Trev said as he came into the room.

  “Hey, buster.” Dori pushed herself to a sitting position, no easy task with the bar and the animal impeding movements. “Speak no unkind words about my baby.” She cuddled Trudy in her lap.

  Trev dropped down on the bench beside Dori and began tousling Trudy’s topknot. Trudy immediately abandoned Dori for this new person.

  “She’s a little licking machine,” Ryan warned as Trudy went up on her hind legs, braced her front legs on Trev’s chest, and greeted him wetly.

  “Nothing like being welcomed home with a kiss,” Trev said and leaned to Dori. She didn’t even hesitate. She turned her face to his and met his kiss.

  “Come on, Trudy,” Ryan yelled. “Time to leave them alone!” He grabbed his backpack and fled upstairs, Trudy at his heels.

  Dori leaped to her feet. “Jack!” She rushed after Ryan, Trev right behind her.

  “What’s wrong with Jack?” he called.

  “You’ll see.”

  They hit the top of the stairs just as Ryan opened his bedroom door, and Jack dashed out. Trudy saw what she thought was an attacking giant and went into confrontation mode. Jack saw a snarling beige fur ball who raced under his belly, yipping and nipping. It was hard to tell who was the most dismayed, the big black dog who rightly understood that his home was no longer his domain or the little fluffy dog who had never had to share her position as Princess Trudy with another. All night they eyed each other with distrust, Trudy from her throne on Dori’s lap, Jack from his seat at Trev’s feet.

  Because Trudy loved Ryan from the moment she saw him and didn’t hesitate to show it by rubbing against his legs or pawing him for attention, the boy was torn. Every time he patted Trudy, he rushed to pat Jack.

  “Don’t worry, boy. I still love you best,” he’d say as he threw his arms around the dog’s neck.

  Jack looked at him with sad eyes and gave him a slobbery kiss.

  Then Trudy struck again, pawing Ryan as she pranced on her back legs.

  It wasn’t even nine o’clock when Ryan said, “I can’t handle this anymore. I’m going to bed.”

  Dori and Trev looked at each other and smiled, sharing the humor in Ryan’s dog dilemma like two people who knew each other well. Once again Dori marveled at how her husband was exactly the same and yet completely different from the young man she’d deserted.

  “By the way,” Trev said as Ryan’s door slammed shut, “I’ll be away overnight Friday.”

  “Overnight?” Visions of the black suitcase being spirited away by a dark figure who wreaked havoc upon her and Ryan rose in Dori’s mind.

  “I’m sorry,” Trev said. “Lousy timing, I know, but I’ve been committed to this conference for several months now.”

  “We’ll be all right,” Dori said, trying to convince herself as much as Trev.

  He studied her for a minute, and she tried to exude confidence. She didn’t like the idea of being here with only Ryan for company, but at least she wouldn’t have to struggle with the distressing confusion that came each night as she watched Trev go to his office to sleep while she went to his bed to stare into the night.

  “I’ll just cancel,” Trev said as enthusiastically as a boy turning down a new video game. “I don’t have to go.”

  “Sure you do,” she said. “I bet you’ve been looking forward to it. Ryan and I will be fine. After all, we’ve got Jack
and Trudy, and maybe Maureen can come and spend the night. Besides, the suitcase will probably be gone by then anyway. In fact, I’m surprised it’s still here.”

  “Me, too. I thought they’d grab it the first night.”

  “Well, the house will be empty all day tomorrow, so that would be a good time for them to strike. In fact, I should write a note, a large one, and stick it on the front door. HOUSE EMPTY. COME AND GET IT.”

  Trev laughed. “Where are you going tomorrow?”

  Feeling very self-conscious, Dori said, “Harbor Lights.”

  Trev straightened in his chair, reached across the distance to the sofa and captured her hand. “Dori Trevelyan, you are a very nice woman.”

  Feeling selfish to the bone because she didn’t really want to go but felt she had no choice, Dori flushed.

  “Lord, thanks for Dori’s willingness to help Mae. Bless her for her kindness.”

  Guilt made her sharp. “For Pete’s sake, Trev, do you pray about everything?”

  “I try to,” he said without embarrassment.

  His expression as he looked at her was warm and loving. It scared her because of the deep yearning it aroused in her. “I think I’ll go to bed so I’m in good shape for tomorrow,” she blurted.

  Trev stood and pulled her to her feet, dislodging an unhappy Trudy. He continued to pull until she was in his arms. They both ignored the complaining Trudy yapping at their ankles.

  “Did you know that I came to California to get you not long after you left?” he asked suddenly.

  She blinked. “What? When? How come I never knew?”

  “I got tired of you never answering my e-mail or talking to me on the phone. I flew out with Pop’s words ringing in my ears. He told me in no uncertain terms that if you were happy, I wasn’t to bother you.”

  “And you thought I was happy?”

  “You were moving into an apartment that day You had who I know now were Meg and her family helping you. Then all I saw were three handsome guys fetching and carrying for you, and you were laughing and having such a good time. Meg and her husband appeared, and you all went off to a picnic in some park after the moving was finished. You played Frisbee, and the biggest of the guys kept hugging you.”

  Dori remembered that day clearly. She had been filled with overwhelming grief because the move made the break with Trev seem that much more final. As a result she had forced manic laughter so she wouldn’t dissolve into tears. Young Ron Reynolds had understood and hugged her to comfort her, each time bringing her closer to tears with his kindness.