Fake

by D. Breeze

That was all I’d wanted.

  The ‘massage table make-out session’ was just an added bonus as far as I was concerned. I hadn’t lied though, the second I thought about some strange guy putting his hands all over her naked body - I freaked. I couldn’t cope with the thought of it.

  Strange. But true.

  And then I stewed on it.

  The feelings.

  I wasn’t avoiding her as such, because I still saw Lydia most days and we were texting constantly - but I knew, and she knew, that I was holding her at arm’s length. It wasn’t even a conscious decision. I loved her, maybe I was in love with her - but I was subconsciously guarding my heart from the pain of losing her, of her walking away.

  Because I knew she would.

  I didn’t doubt my ability to win her back, I was fairly certain I could. But the way my stomach clenched when I thought about watching her walk away from me.

  No. Not acceptable.

  So I was trying to keep myself from getting too deep with her.

  It was an impossible task.

  Which is why I found myself sitting on a bus full of old women and a few teenagers - on my way to meet Lydia from work. She didn’t know I was going to be there and I wanted it that way. I liked that I could surprise her - I hoped it would always be that way.

  My phone started blaring in my pocket, making me shoot an apologetic glance at the lady sitting next to me when she jumped half a foot in the air. I didn’t recognise the number, but answered anyway.

  “Hello?”

  “I can’t believe you did it!” The hushed voice on the other end of the phone replied.

  I frowned at the screen again, not sure if I was hearing right.

  “Lucas?”

  “Of course it’s me! Idiot. I can’t believe you did it!”

  “Did um...what?”

  “Did what?! Are you mad?

  Completely not understanding why he was phoning me, or what he was talking about, I chose not to respond. The sigh that followed said he was already losing patience with me.

  Tough shit.

  He made a noise of annoyance. “For a smart guy, you can be so stupid. Freddy! He’s in jail!”

  “Huh?”

  “Err yeah! I don’t know all the details, but I know they arrested him a few days ago - something about possession with intent to supply. It’s not a life-sentence he’s looking at, but it’s something. Never thought Lydia might actually be on to something when she shopped him to the police.”

  How did I not know this?

  “How do you even know that?” I asked, or more, I demanded.

  “I’m locked up. Not blind or deaf or stupid. That cunt is, was, after my baby sister. I make it my business to know what’s going on. You should too. Is she ok? She hasn’t answered my letter.”

  “She’s...well, she’s fine. I’m guessing she didn’t answer any letter because she hasn’t spoken to your mum since…” I broke off, not wanting to think too much about that day. “And she lives in London now.”

  “With you?” He questioned.

  “Um, no. She has a little place of her own. That’s how she wanted it. She’s happier, she’s still got that shit job at Wildlands but it pays the bills…” I went on to tell him everything that was going on with her and about our day out, without mentioning the broken table and those details.

  He was silent for so long that I wasn’t sure if I lost him.

  Then he spoke again and I panicked.

  “What’s going on with you two?” He asked.

  “Nothing.” I denied, too quickly.

  “You better not be taking advantage of her, Ruben. Because I swear to God, regardless of whether you saved her or not. I’m still pissed at you anyway, and my six years inside will feel like five fucking minutes for you if you’ve been near her.”

  “You know what, Luc? Fuck you. Fuck you for thinking I’d ever take advantage of anyone, let alone Lydia. Fuck you for thinking that you’re in any sort of position for making threats. And fuck you for getting Lydia in that position in the first place. My life was fucked from the second I was born. You on the other hand, you chose to get involved. You chose to keep doing it and you God damn chose to drag your sister down with you.”

  As much as I knew that he wouldn’t be happy about anything between me and Lydia, it was just too damn bad.

  “Fuck me? Fuck you, Ruben. You deserted us and now that you’re...wherever the fuck you are - you get to come back and play knight in shining armour, while I’m stuck in this shit hole for six years.”

  “You know what? I’m done with this conversation. Maybe when you’ve had, oh I don’t know...six years to think about it - you’ll grow up and stop being a…” I was interrupted by a voice in the background.

  “Time’s up, Romero. Back to the block.”

  I laughed. “That’s it, Romero. It’s bed time.”

  I hung-up the phone and cringed. On one hand, he had every reason to be angry, at me, at life, at the injustice of it all. But on the other, it was his own damn fault that he was inside at all. His mum and dad might be shit parents, but they didn’t force him to be involved in any of their crap.

  In fact, the one thing they ever did right, was to try and keep their kids away from Freddy. Not that it worked out well for them, clearly.

  I could obviously understand him being pissed that his childhood best friend hooked-up with his sister, but to accuse me of taking advantage? No.

  Still, joking about him being stuck inside for six years was a bit too far. If he could get inside information on what was happening with Freddy, which clearly he could, I needed him on side.

  But it wasn’t like I could just call him back.

  Damn it!

  I sighed and leaned my head back against the seat. I didn’t need that shit swirling around in my brain whilst I was on the way to meet Lydia. She would know something was wrong, but she wouldn’t question it. She rarely questioned anything actually, which I found really odd considering she was the world’s most inquisitive child. I assumed she just grew out of it - part of becoming an adult maybe.

  I couldn’t help but miss it though.

  When I saw that we were approaching the bus-stop, I pressed the buzzer and stood.

  Time to get your gameface on, Ruben.

  It took a good twenty minutes for me to reach the park after I got off the bus, but I grinned when I saw Lydia walking out of the gates, right on time. She had her headphones on, her head down and her blonde hair flipped forward, shielding her face.

  I crept up on her and when I was within arms reach, I touched a hand to her shoulder. I thought it would be funny to see her jump out of her skin. But I underestimated her.

  She swung around, flinging her handbag directly towards my nuts. I felt them contract and try to climb back inside my body as my stomach hollowed out and pain shot straight from my groin. As I groaned and leant over to cradle my balls in my hand, she let her fist fly and punched me in the cheek.

  That wasn’t nearly as painful as a handbag to the nuts, but I still flinched.

  “Get off!” She screeched.

  I felt the urge to crawl up into a ball on the pavement, but I just took a deep breath and yelled at her to stop.

  *~*~*

  Lydia

  “STOP!” The guy who’d tried to grab me shouted but I knew better than to let anyone gain the upper hand, so I swung my handbag out again, aiming for his crotch.

  It only smacked off the back of his hand but I took the opportunity to turn and run.

  I had never been mugged before and I had no intention of letting that guy be the first.

  I’d managed about a hundred feet head-start when he called my name on a wheezing breath and I stumbled to a stop. Swivelling around on my feet, I glanced back, about to question him about how he knew who I was.

  Froze.

  Cringed.

  And ran right back where I’d just come from.

  “Oh my God! I’m so sorry!”

  Ruben gro
aned again and held a hand out to stop me coming any closer.

  “Just…” he wheezed. “Just give me a second.”

  “I’m sorry! I’m so sorry! Are you ok?”

  He groaned out a few seconds of incomprehensible babble, then took a deep breath and stood up straighter, squaring his shoulders.

  “Surprise!” He croaked sarcastically.

  Surprise? Sur-fucking-prise?

  “S-surprise? Are you out of your freaking mind? You scared the crap out of me!” My voice was high-pitched and squeaky, but damn it! He’d scared me, and earned himself a blow to the balls for it.

  He winced. “Yeah, about that. It didn’t exactly go the way I planned it.”

  “No shit!” I joked, and because I couldn’t help it, I giggled at his discomfort. Hopefully he’d learn his lesson not to creep up on women. Idiot.

  His rueful grin made me laugh more.

  “What are you doing here anyway?” I asked, once I’d calmed down and my heart rate had returned to normal.

  He shrugged, looking like he wasn’t even sure himself.

  “I wanted to see you. Thought you’d like some company on the way home.”

  I smiled at him. After the day I’d had, I could more than use the company.

  “Well thank you. I love that. I’ve missed you.”

  The last part slipped out before I could think it through and I held my breath, hoping I hadn’t said too much too fast. He didn’t seem to mind though, he just threw his arm across my shoulders and squeezed me into his side.

  He started heading towards the bus-stop and I vaguely wondered where his car was.

  But I didn’t ask.

  I never did.

  It was actually frustrating because there was so much that I was dying to know.

  But here’s the thing.

  I physically couldn’t do it.

  My brain was telling me to ask questions but my mouth wouldn’t cooperate. I wanted to know where he lived, where he worked, who his friends were.

  I didn’t know any of those things.

  Part of me was too scared to ask, and the other part was just too happy to be with him - that I didn’t even care about who he was when he was away from me. Realistically, I knew it was irrational, even a little irresponsible of me. I just...didn’t...care.

  I wanted the Ruben that was with me. The fear of the unknown, just kept me from questioning him about anything.

  Plus, I figured anything that he wanted me know, or anything that I needed to know - he would tell me himself.

  “The car’s in the garage.” He muttered moments later.

  “Oh I don’t mind. I’m used to the journey anyway. It’s just nice to have you with me.” I shot him a shy smile.

  *~*~*

  “Well, we have...drum roll...noodles and bread?” I suggested later when we were back at my flat.

  He rolled his eyes.

  “Noodles again, huh? Yeah, sure that’s fine.”

  I put the food on, whilst he sat on the sofa, with his feet on the coffee table and watched some football game on the TV. I’d pay more attention if I cared at all about football. I just didn’t.

  I also loved that he was clearly comfortable enough with me, to come back, throw himself down on the sofa and make himself at home! There was something very ‘cave woman’ about my love of it - but it was there all the same.

  “You want butter on your bread?” I called through to the lounge.

  He didn’t respond with words.

  I felt the heat of his body behind me before his arms wrapped around my waist and he pulled me back into him. A shiver ran through me, right from my head to my toes. I tilted my head back and to the side to look at him.

  Before I could ask him what he was doing, he pressed his mouth to mine in a chaste kiss and I melted back into him.

  “Leave the food.” He demanded and I nodded.

  He grabbed my hand and lead me back through the lounge and the curtain, before lying down across my bed and dragging me on top of him. I yelped as I fell, but he caught me and held my hips tight to his, causing me to groan.

  I kissed him.

  Not chaste, or sweet, but with all the lust that was coursing through my veins. Our tongues entwined and my hips moved of their own accord, grinding down into him, desperately trying to gain some friction where I needed it so badly.

  I closed my eyes and savoured the feeling of having him underneath me. I wanted him, right there, that second, I’d have done anything to have him inside me.

  He, on the other hand, had different plans.

  He flipped us over and held my hands in both of his down by my sides. I felt my eyes widen in a silent question.

  Staring at me for a beat, he dragged his teeth across his bottom lip so slowly that I genuinely thought I was going to internally combust.

  So. Damn. Erotic.

  He smirked and released his lip, but bought his face down close to mine and whispered, “Can I touch you?”

  I nodded quickly.

  Probably too quickly because I was so eager to have his hands on me. He released his grip on my hands and sat back on my thighs, sliding his eyes over me in a way that felt physical. I felt his gaze heating me from the inside out and wiggled my hips to get him to just...move.

  His hands crept up my sides, dragging my red work t-shirt with them and he whipped it over my head, leaving me in my black trousers and bra. My breaths come short and fast as I tried to control my reaction to him, but nothing worked. The man knew how to play my body like his personal instrument.

  “Tell me when to stop.” He muttered as his lips descended on the skin just below my collar bone.

  The touch was whisper-soft but I felt the shot of it straight to my core. I’d never tell him to stop.

  Not. Ever.

  He kissed his way down between my breasts, and followed the line all the way down my quivering stomach. He stopped when he reached the button on my trousers, but sent me a wicked grin before flicking the button open with his thumb and forefinger.

  God damn.

  That look was hot enough to melt the panties straight off any women. I was just lucky that I got to be that woman. My eyes rolled back and I sighed. Luck had never been a big part of my life, but right then, in that moment, I was the luckiest woman in the entire world.

  Edging my trousers and panties down my thighs, he didn’t take his eyes off my exposed skin and I watched as his eyes turned molten.

  Something about that look made my legs quiver.

  *~*~*

  Ruben

  I had to have her.

  She was standing in the kitchen, looking all domestic and talking about making bloody noodles and bread for dinner and the caveman in me me just had to have her.

  I knew she was a virgin.

  I needed her to offer that gift to me, but it didn’t mean we couldn’t play in the meantime.

  Having her lying beneath me, her chest rapidly rising and falling with every breath, her thighs shaking and the scent of her arousal surrounding me.

  I felt like the luckiest guy in the whole damn world.

  Sliding the tip of one finger over her clit, I could have come in my trousers like a teenage boy when she moaned and threw her head back. The way she reacted to my touch made me want to ‘roar’ and beat my chest.

  Coating my fingers in her juices, I slipped one, then two inside her and stroked her inner walls.

  Keeping my eyes on her face to gage her reaction, I sped up the motion and twisted my fingers inside her pussy as I felt her muscles tighten. She grabbed my wrist to stop me when the pressure was too much for her, but I wanted her to have the release she needed after a long day at work.

  She cried my name and swung her head from side to side, her insides quivered and I lowered my head to suck on her clit, drawing out her orgasm.

  The taste of her on my tongue just made it that much sweeter.

  I don’t care what any guy says, ever, there is nothing that makes us feel like a real m
an more - than making your woman orgasm and feeling, hearing, tasting and experiencing every damn second of it.

  Lydia’s skin shone, her cheeks were flushed and her eyes were still closed so I crawled over her and pulled her into my chest. I rained kisses across her neck and collarbone as I waited for her breathing to even out.

  “Ruben?”

  “I’m right here, Lyds!” I joked.

  “Why did you stop?”

  I knew what she meant, but I couldn’t answer her. Fact remained that she was a virgin and I’d only had her back in my life for just over six weeks. We hadn’t even been an ‘us’ for three of those weeks, so it just felt a bit...wrong.

  I needed to earn it.

  “I just wanted to give you that. We’re not ready for more.”

  She frowned and leant up on one elbow.

  “Who says? I want you, I know you want me too,” her eyes drew to the bulge still begging for attention in my trousers. “So why do you stop every time? I never even get to touch you!”

  I knew she wouldn’t understand. I took a moment to think of the best way to say what needed to be said.

  Sucking in a breath of air, I explained.

  “Ok, I know you said that I’m not taking advantage, but we’ve gone from zero to sixty at the speed of light. I just think maybe you should give yourself a bit more time before you go making any decisions you might end up regretting in the long run. Who’s to say that you won’t wake up in a couple of weeks and realise that you’re not in love with me? It could happen. Everything has changed for you in less than two months and I’m just...um...uneasy about going any further until I know I’m what or who you really want.”

  I was pretty sure that was a damn good explanation, so I lay back and threw my arm across my eyes.

  I didn’t expect her to shove me across the bed, so when she did, my arms flailed and I landed with a ‘thud’ on the floor.

  “What the hell?!”

  I looked up into Lydia’s scowling face hanging over the edge of the bed and frowned at her.

  “You’re so full of shit. My life is better now. I’m not a child for God’s sake! So don’t treat me like one. I know what I want, it’s you who’s too scared to act on it. What exactly is it that you’re afraid of, Ruben? That you’ll finally fall in love with me? That you’ll have to actually share something about yourself with me? That you’re shit in bed? I’d love to know. Genuinely. Because I’m not the one doubting myself. So damn you for thinking I don’t know my own mind.”