Love, Lucas

by Chantele Sedgwick

  “Do you do this a lot?” I ask as I shove my last fry in my mouth.

  She shakes her head. “Not really. The last time I did this was with my ex-boyfriend.” She chuckles. “I’d rather not talk about him though. He’s old news.”

  “Oh. Okay.” I’m kind of glad; something tells me Jo’s love life is really complicated.

  “Hey, Jo!” Someone calls from across the beach. We both look over and see Carson running toward us, carrying his surfboard. He’s wet from head to toe and still has a slight limp, but he’s obviously well enough to be surfing again.

  “Carson, you better be taking care of that foot. You shouldn’t be out surfing so soon.”

  He shrugs and his eyes shift to mine, but only for a second. “It’s nothing. Good as new, in fact.”

  She frowns. “Just keep it wrapped up. You don’t want to hurt it even more. And if you bleed, you know what you could attract.”

  “I know. No worries, Jo. I’m not even surfing; I’m teaching today.” He smiles and looks at me. “Hey, Oakley. Nice to see you again.”

  “Hi.” I refuse to look at Jo. I can feel her watching me and I pray she doesn’t say anything to embarrass me.

  “Well, just thought I’d say hi. I’d better get back. My student’s waiting for me.” He backs up, his eyes still on mine until he finally turns around and runs back into the water.

  He gives surf lessons? Huh. As I watch him in the water, I think back on Lucas’s advice for the day. Learn something new. What about surfing? Right. Like I could learn how to surf. Carson’s probably been surfing since he was a little kid. I’m seventeen. I’m like that stupid saying: you can’t teach an old dog new tricks.

  But what if I could learn how to surf? I wonder what he charges? Maybe if I see him again I’ll ask him about it. Learning something new could be good for me.

  I can still feel Jo staring at me. I sneak a look at her and frown at the grin she’s giving me. “He’s a good guy. You really should go out with him.”

  I sigh. “He seems like he is, but I’m not really here to date people. I’m leaving in a few months anyway.” I fold my arms and watch Carson in the water again. “Besides, he hasn’t asked me out, so how could I go out with him?”

  “Oh, I don’t know. You could always ask him.”

  I chuckle. “Can you really see me asking anyone out? I can’t even look people in the eye when I talk to them.”

  Jo laughs. “You’re not that shy.”

  “I am. There’s no way I could get up the guts to ask a guy out. Especially one I barely know. And isn’t it the guy’s job to ask the girl out?”

  “It’s the twenty-first century, babe. Girls ask guys out all the time now.”

  “I know. I just . . . can’t. It would be weird.”

  “Too bad for you.” She stands, grabs the wrappers from our dinner, and starts back toward the house. I watch Carson standing on the beach, talking to a boy who looks like he’s about eight. He says something and points to the waves, ruffles the kid’s hair, and walks out in the water with him.

  He looks so at ease. Relaxed. Cute.

  I shake my head. Stupid. I don’t need a guy to distract me. I’m trying to find myself. Or move on or whatever. Start over. I take one last look at him before following Jo back to the house.

  I’m surprised to see Mom when we walk back in. She’s on the phone and looks like she hasn’t slept in days. She sees me, stops talking, and gives me a small smile. I’m sure it’s Dad on the other end but I don’t stick around long enough to find out. Even though I want to know where she’s been all day, I don’t want to know what’s going on between them. Not now, anyway. By the way Mom looks, it’s not good.

  I head to my room, change out of my sweaty tank top and shorts, and put on a yellow sundress. I’m not a huge fan of dresses, but I like the happy color. And it’s freaking hot outside, so it feels nice to wear something light. I put more sunscreen on my arms and face, grab my camera, and head across the street to the beach. I don’t really have a plan for where I’m going but end up at the tide pools again.

  Once there, I take a few more photographs of the rocks, the ocean, and the starfish. The starfish are still close to the surface and this time I don’t hesitate at all as I set my camera on the rock and reach my hand into the cold water to grab one. I cringe a little as I pull it away from the rock it’s stuck to and turn it over to see the little sucker things on the other side. I wonder if the little hole in the center of the starfish is the mouth? I’m not really an expert on starfish anatomy, so I have no idea. I may have to look it up when I get home.

  “You really like those starfish.”

  I jump and curse as I almost knock my camera into the water.

  “Sorry,” Carson said. “I always seem to scare you.”

  “Yeah, you kind of have a habit of showing up out of nowhere.” I smile and scoot back from the water, making sure my dress is down. I didn’t realize how unladylike I was sitting before he showed up. Hopefully he didn’t notice. “And yes, I do like starfish. They’re pretty cool. Not as cool as whales, but they’re still interesting.”

  “Whales are amazing.”

  “They really are. Jo took me out on the boat earlier and showed me a bunch of blue whales. In person! It was awesome.”

  He nods. “Your aunt’s the coolest. Mind if I sit?” He gestures to the rock beside me.

  I smile up at him. “I’d love some company.” As the words come out, I realize how true they are.

  He sits down and leans back on his hands, totally relaxed. There are drops of water in his light hair and he runs his hand through it to get them out. He’s still in his wet suit, though he’s pulled the top down so it hangs low around his waist. I can’t help but peek at his ripped chest. It’s nice. Nice enough for me to stare at him like an idiot. Which I’m still doing.

  “Do you like being by yourself all the time?”

  His question catches me off guard and I look away from his body and out into the water. “No, not really.” I hate it, especially since I used to spend all my time with Lucas at the hospital. I don’t want to admit I’m lonely, but that’s the only word that comes to mind. “I just don’t really know anyone around here, so I don’t really have a choice.”

  “Then you should hang out with us.” He sets his hand on my shoulder and squeezes it before leaning back again.

  I give him a small smile. “I’m pretty sure those girls you introduced me to last night don’t like me much.”

  He gives me a weird look and shakes his head. “They’re just girls. Shy until they get to know someone.” His shoulder bumps mine. “Kind of like you, I think.”

  “I guess.” I realize I’m still holding the starfish.

  “Just drop it in the water and it will eventually get back to the rock by itself. Try not to drop it on its back or it’ll get stuck.”

  “I rescued a starfish that was stuck on its back yesterday,” I tell him. I lean over the tide pool, drop it, and watch it until it lands at the bottom. I wonder if it’s cursing me for making it have to climb all the way up the rocks again.

  “Perfect,” he says.

  I lean back and don’t realize how close he is until I turn to look at him. His face is inches from mine and his brown eyes are light and curious. His breath catches and his eyes flick to my lips. My heart races and I realize I haven’t moved. What am I doing? I’m supposed to be grieving. Not lusting after some guy.

  Embarrassed and mad at myself, I move over a little and stretch my legs in front of me. He follows suit, his legs stretched out a few inches from mine. We sit there for a while, not saying much. I can’t really look at him anyway, since that moment was sort of awkward. Instead I pass the time taking pictures of the surfers on the water while he points out different creatures in the tide pools.

  I gasp when I see a guy on his board crash pretty hard on a wave, but he comes up sputtering and goes right back out for another run. “I don’t know how you guys do that.”

>   Carson looks up. “Surf?”

  I nod. “It looks so hard. And when the wave pushes you under the water . . .” I rub the goosebumps on my arms and shake my head.

  “It’s not too bad. Once you get up the first time, it gets easier.”

  “I doubt that.” I watch the same guy fall again. That would be me. No . . . I would have fallen off a lot sooner than he did.

  “I can teach you if you’re interested in learning.”

  My heart races. “Really?” I look at him, but he doesn’t notice. He’s staring out into the waves again.

  “Of course. It would be my pleasure.” He glances at me for a second and looks away again.

  I put my camera away. Learn something new. Part of me is terrified and the other part is thrilled. It would definitely take my mind off things. And having a hot surfer teach me wouldn’t be so bad either. I lean toward him. “Could we start tomorrow?” I smile and blush at how forward I sound. “I mean—”

  “I’ll tell you what. If you let me show you around the city tonight, I’ll start our lessons tomorrow.”

  “Why do you want to show me around?”

  He shrugs and plays with a brown bracelet around his wrist, not meeting my eyes. “I like going into town and you’re new and should see what’s around. And it would be nice to have a pretty girl on my arm.”

  I laugh. He sounds like he’s from a different century.

  “That sounded really lame, right?” He laughs too. “I was trying to be polite, not weird. I’m serious though. I’d like some company and who better than you?”

  “Oh.” This time I swear my whole body turns red. I’m flattered he thinks I’m interesting enough to hang out with, but not quite sure what to say. I didn’t come here looking for a relationship . . . but honestly, I really could use a friend.

  “So, will you come?”

  I glance at him and try not to get lost in his brown-eyed gaze. Which is surprisingly hard. “Sure. What time?”

  He stands and I grab my camera as he takes my hand and helps me up. “How about six? We can grab some dinner and I’ll show you around the pier.”

  “Okay.”

  “Mind if I walk you back to your place?”

  I shake my head. “Not at all.”

  He helps me down from the rocks and grabs his surfboard which has been lying on the sand. I didn’t even notice it before. It’s yellow. Almost the same color as my dress. He holds it under one arm and I can’t help but stare at him again.

  “Get any good pictures today?”

  “A few.”

  “You’ll have to show me some of them. Sometime . . .” He trails off and smiles at the look on my face. “What?”

  I wring my hands together and chew on my lip. “I don’t know. I don’t really show a lot of people my work.”

  “Well, you should. I can tell you love it. Taking pictures, I mean.”

  “It’s fun. Therapeutic, I guess.”

  “Therapeutic?”

  I stop walking for a second and clear my throat. “Um . . . never mind.” I’m not going there.

  Thankfully, he leaves it alone.

  We reach the house sooner than I want. It’s nice hanging out with someone close to my age.

  “I’ll see you tonight then?”

  “Yes. Thanks for walking me back.”

  He pats me on the back and his hand lingers a little longer than it should. “No problem.”

  I say goodbye and walk inside, shutting the door behind me. I’m not sure what to think about this. Am I doing the right thing? Mom told me to make friends, but me and a guy alone together? I’m not sure that’s what she meant. Even so, he said he’d teach me how to surf. And Lucas would be proud of me for learning something new. So, the main reason I’m going with Carson is because I want to thank him for volunteering to teach me to surf. Yes. That’s it. It’s not a date; it’s not a romantic stroll on the pier. It’s business only.

  With that thought, I head to my room and stare at the pile of clothes heaped in my closet. What am I going to wear tonight?

  CHAPTER 7

  I’m addicted to Lucas’s random thoughts. Before I start stressing out about Carson, I read an entry in the notebook. His words are calming. I know I should wait and save one for each day, but I need to read what he has to say next.

  DEAR OAKLEY,

  YOU KNOW HOW I LIKE TO SING IN THE SHOWER AT HOME? I TOTALLY DO IT HERE, TOO. A KID ON MY FLOOR SAYS I HAVE A PRETTY AWESOME VOICE. HE EVEN GAVE ME A RECOMMENDATION TO SING TOMORROW. I THINK IT’S HILARIOUS THAT HE CAN HEAR ME, SINCE HE'S ALL THE WAY DOWN THE HALL. THAT MEANS I’M LOUDER THAN I THOUGHT I WAS. MAYBE I’LL TONE IT DOWN A LITTLE . . .

  NAH. I’M GOOD.

  I WOULD ASK YOU TO SING A DUET, BUT YOU KNOW . . . HA HA.

  LOVE, LUCAS

  Did he have to bring up my crappy singing voice again? With a smile on my face, I close the notebook and go get ready.

  Carson picks me up at six. When I open the front door, he stares at me and clears his throat. “You look amazing.”

  “Thanks.” I wouldn’t say amazing, but I did put on a little more makeup and actually thought about what to wear. Which, since this was just a business outing, made no sense at all. I look down at my light blue tank and my favorite jeans and blush. They’re not the nicest but I have to admit, the jeans make my butt look pretty good. At least that’s what my friends used to tell me.

  “Hey, Carson.” Jo peeks around the corner and waves.

  “Hey, Jo! Do you need my help anytime soon?”

  “I’m sure I could use you this week. Just stop in anytime.” She smiles and leaves us alone.

  I don’t say goodbye to Mom. I haven’t seen her since earlier. Maybe tomorrow I’ll ask her about her phone conversation with Dad and why she looks so tired all the time, but for now, I’m going to enjoy myself.

  “You ready?” Carson asks.

  “Yep.” My palms are sweaty and I’m sure my armpits are, too. How embarrassing. I should have worn a darker shirt.

  Carson seems at ease as he walks me to his Jeep. I stare at the beast in front of me. I’ve never ridden in a Jeep before. It’s green and black and I’m sure really windy. I’m glad my hair is in a ponytail. He opens the passenger door for me and I climb in with trembling hands.

  “This is nice,” I say as he climbs in the driver’s seat and starts it up.

  “Thanks. She’s my baby. I named her Helga.”

  Helga? I think it’s kind of goofy when guys name their cars, but I decide to keep that thought to myself.

  We sit in silence as he drives down the street. I’m not sure what to say, how to act. I have no idea where to put my hands, so I keep them in my lap. I want to fold my arms, but figure I’d look uncomfortable or cold or something when I’m boiling hot. Still sweating, actually. Good times.

  I don’t know where he’s taking me or what we’re going to do, I’m just glad to be out of the house with another person. And as a bonus, a really attractive and nice person.

  After a few minutes of driving, he pulls into a parking lot. A bunch of cute shops line the street and he parks in front of a surfing one called Nye’s Surf Shop. He gets out and I do the same. I’m not about to make him walk around to open the door for me, which by the look on his face, he was clearly coming to do. I smile and shrug.

  This isn’t a date. I have to keep reminding myself of that fact.

  The air is warm and a slight breeze tousles my hair. I cross my arms and join Carson as we walk toward the shop together.

  A white sign with bright blue paint sits next to the door. SURFING LESSONS AVAILABLE. DETAILS INSIDE.

  I’m curious if Carson is going to get someone from this shop to teach me how to surf instead of giving me lessons himself. Before I can ask, he pulls the screen door open and a little bell jingles. He waits until I walk inside and lets the door shut behind him.

  The shop is amazing. Surfboards are everywhere in every color you can imagine. They hang on wires attached to
the ceiling, are stacked neatly against the wall, and a few are actually hung on the wall. I’m not sure if they’re decorations or if they are actually available for purchase.

  I notice a price tag on one and get my answer.

  There are shirts, wet suits, board shorts, and tank tops hung on the racks throughout the store. Hats, sunglasses, and other little things are on displays as well. I see a cute pair of pink board shorts and stop myself from checking the price on them. I’m not here to shop, but if I were, I’d totally buy them.

  “Hey, Dillon,” Carson says.

  I look up to see Dillon waiting at the counter. He’s rubbing something on an orange surfboard and when he sees me, he breaks into a smile.

  I take a step forward so I’m standing by Carson. It smells like coconuts and I’m not sure if it’s Dillon or the surfboard.

  “Oakley,” he says, taking a pair of sunglasses off his head and pointing at its logo. He laughs.

  Like I haven’t heard that one before. I smile anyway.

  “What brings you two here?” He glances curiously at Carson.

  “Just taking Oakley out to see the pier.”

  So that’s where we’re going. Huntington Pier. I’ve heard of it, but obviously haven’t been.

  Dillon shoots Carson a look I can’t read. “Really? It’s pretty cool.”

  “I’m taking her on a bike ride first.”

  What? Is he joking?

  “Why didn’t you just ride your bikes instead of drive?”

  “Because my bike is here. And so is Keilani’s. Oakley’s going to borrow hers. She won’t mind.”

  Dillon laughs. “That’s what you think. She’ll kick your butt if she finds out.”

  Carson shrugs. “I can take her.”

  I stare at both of them with wide eyes. He would beat up a girl over a bike? He must be joking.

  “I get off in an hour or so. Maybe I’ll join ya,” Dillon says.

  Carson glances at me and hesitates before nodding. “Sure.”

  “We can show Oakley how to have a good time.” He smiles. “There’s tons of stuff to do around here.”

  “Sounds like a party,” I say. Dillon raises an eyebrow and gives me a wicked grin, which confirms I’ve said the wrong thing.