by Lori Ryan
“I think you should see him again, sweetheart. I wouldn’t tell you to do that if I thought he was still drinking or thought he would hurt you.”
Silence. Her daughter was as stubborn as she was. She’d raised Mia to be strong, but she still sometimes silently cursed that strength when she had to run up against it herself.
“Mia, give him a chance to tell you what happened. He was a good man once, and I believe he still is. Let him tell you why he left.”
“Why don’t you tell me?”
She sighed. Mia had asked that question many times over the years, and she’d always simply given her the answer that it was complicated. The old speech of it wasn’t about you, it was about mommy and daddy. “It’s not my story to tell, Mia. It needs to come from your dad. But I would like you to give him the chance to tell you.”
A quiet “all right” came after a pause, and Lynn hoped that could be the start of true healing for the heartbreak her daughter had carried all these years.
Chapter 7
“Lo?” Jax was distracted as he picked up his phone. The spreadsheet on his computer was making his eyes cross. He didn’t know how this company thought they could get funding from Sutton if they didn’t get someone over there who understood how to organize numbers and run simple financial analysis. Unfortunately, their product had potential so it was worth it for him to see if he could wrap his head around what they were trying to convey with this shit.
“Is this Jaxon Cutter?”
Jax sat up and turned away from the computer. When a stranger sounded like that, there was only bad news to be had. His thoughts flew to his brothers first. All three of them were still overseas. But his parents would be the first to get news about them and it wouldn’t be by phone.
“Yes.”
“Mr. Cutter, I’m calling from New Haven Central Clinic. Leo Kent has you listed as his emergency contact.”
Shit. Jax was up and out of his chair, grabbing his wallet and keys from his desk and headed toward the bank of elevators in the Sutton Capital lobby. “Has something happened?”
“Mr. Kent was transported to Yale New Haven Hospital by ambulance twenty minutes ago. He came in this morning to see the doctor and suffered a cardiac event while in the office.”
“I don’t understand.” Jax stabbed repeatedly at the elevator button. Why the hell didn’t the thing come? “Why didn’t he call me? Who brought him there?”
She seemed a little taken aback and he couldn’t really blame her. His questions made no sense and he couldn’t really expect the poor woman to know why Leo hadn’t called Jax for a ride. “I believe he took the bus, but I’m not sure.”
He could hear voices in the background on her end of the line.
“I’m sorry, Mr. Cutter, you’ll need to speak with the hospital now. As I said, he was transferred there. I can give you their information if you need it.”
“No.” He mashed the elevator button again. “Thank you, I’m on my way there.”
Jax knew he wouldn’t get information from anyone at the hospital over the phone. His best course would be to get down there in person right away. He texted the other members of his team to let them know he was leaving as the elevator descended at a snail’s pace to the garage.
Not being able to do anything for Leo during the drive over was maddening. He wasn’t a do nothing kind of guy. And it only got worse when he got to the ER.
“I understand, ma’am, but he listed me as his emergency contact at the clinic when he checked in there this morning. Can’t you get that information from them?”
He looked at the nurse and hoped she’d take mercy on him. She gave him the kind of look that told him she had too many other things to worry about right then.
“Please?” He hadn’t been able to even confirm that Leo was there, much less what condition he was in.
“All right, I’ll call over there.” She gave him a look, but he let out a breath as he saw her walk behind the desk and pick up the phone.
Jax went back to searching the internet on his phone. He remembered that Mia worked at a law firm in Hartford from the letter he’d mailed for Leo. He was currently searching the terms Mia, Kent, law, and Hartford in hopes he’d hit on her firm.
Bingo. She was listed as the office manager at Schuler and Koskoff. Jax looked up and saw the nurse walking back to him before he had a chance to dial Mia’s office.
He could see from the woman’s face that she didn’t have good news, but he didn’t expect what she told him.
“The clinic confirmed you’re Mr. Kent’s emergency contact, Mr. Cutter. I’m afraid that doesn’t mean that I have much news for you. Mr. Kent was admitted in full cardiac arrest. The doctors are working on him right now. I’ll let you know as soon as I have an update on his condition.”
He could see and hear the softness in her face and tone, and knew from that alone Leo wasn’t in good shape. He once again began mentally hurling curses at himself. He’d known something was wrong with Leo. He should have gotten him to the clinic earlier. And when the doctor gave him more medicine, he should have insisted on more. Tests. Something.
“Thank you.” He nodded and watched as she walked away, then lifted the phone to his ear knowing if he’d just gone to see Leo this morning, he might have gotten him help earlier.
“Mia Kent.” Mia’s voice was calm, cool, and collected, just the way, he had a feeling, she liked her world.
Jax hated that he was about to rock that sense of calm for her. Despite that their interactions had all been contentious, if he ever got to know Mia Kent, he was pretty sure he’d find he liked the woman. Well, liked her beyond just his first impression of gorgeous woman with soulful eyes and legs that didn’t quit.
Holy hell. He cursed himself for thinking about Mia like that at a moment like this. What the hell was wrong with him?
“Hi, Mia. It’s Jax Cutter. Your dad’s friend. I’m calling from Yale New Haven Hospital.” He rushed on, wanting to get this over with. “I’m sorry to call you at work, but I didn’t know how else to get ahold of you and your mom.”
“Yes?” There was a trepidation to her tone that kicked him in the gut.
“Your dad had a heart attack. I’m afraid I don’t know much more than that. They’re working on him now, but I thought you and your mom …” Jax didn’t really know what to say. You and your mom, who apparently hadn’t heard from your dad in years until I blew it and wrote a return address on an envelope, might want to come down here and see him?
He didn’t know what Mia and her mom would want to do or what Leo would want. All he knew was if his dad were sick—really, really sick like Leo seemed to be—he’d want to know about it. But Jax and his dad had a very different relationship than Mia and her dad did. Anyone with half a brain could piece that together.
“I just thought you should know,” he finished lamely.
“Thank you.”
Jax pulled the phone back from his ear and looked at it. Just as he’d thought. She’d hung up.
Well, he’d done what he could. It was up to Mia now to tell her mom and for the two of them to decide if they wanted to be here.
His cell phone buzzed as a text came through.
Let me know if you need anything.
Logan. Jax texted a quick reply updating Logan, knowing full well his friend would come down here if Jax so much as hinted he needed him. There wasn’t anything Logan could do, though. All they could do was wait at this point.
Chapter 8
Mia watched Jax from a distance as he paced the waiting room floor. Her mother stood by her side, but they had yet to enter the room. As they stood in the entranceway, she wondered if her mom was feeling the same odd detachment she was.
She felt numb. And a little angry. Okay, that wasn’t true. She felt a lot angry. Jax was clearly worried sick about her dad. He seemed to glance at the front desk every few minutes as though hoping for an update that wasn’t coming.
It made her angry that he had such a
connection to her father. A father she’d needed, craved in her life all these years. A man who had left her and her mother alone all this time. Somehow Jax had built a relationship with that man and she’d never been given that chance.
“We have to go in sometime.” Her mother’s words were patient and soft.
Mia really wanted to turn to her and challenge the statement. Did they have to go in sometime? Not really. Her father hadn’t been in her life in years. Why start now?
Instead, Mia nodded and stepped forward, triggering the double doors to slide open with an electronic whoosh. The air conditioning hit full blast and Jax’s gaze found hers instantly, deep brown eyes softening as he came across the room to them.
“I haven’t heard anything yet,” he said, speaking directly to her, but turning to her mother right away. “I’m Jax Cutter. I would have called you directly, but I didn’t know how to reach you.”
His politeness was the kind bred into a person from birth and Mia had the odd feeling he had been raised by a family where politeness and manners was not only expected but demanded. Kindness, too, she thought, then shook her head. She didn’t know why her brain refused to function at the moment. Maybe it was a coping mechanism. Focus on the gorgeous military man in front of you so you don’t have to face the reality of your situation.
She didn’t know how she knew he had been in the military. She hadn’t even noticed the prosthetic leg the first time she met him, but she’d seen it the second. That could be from an accident or any number of other things, though.
Maybe it was the way his hair still had that high and tight kind of look to it, or whatever they called it. Or she’d simply assumed it since he was friends with her dad.
The runaway train to bizarro land that her head seemed to be on was cut off by the approach of a man in scrubs.
The man glanced from her mother, to Mia, and back to Jax before speaking.
“Jax Cutter?”
“That’s me.” Jax seemed to notice the way the doctor took in both women. “This is Leo’s daughter and—” he stopped and looked to Mia’s mom as though realizing they hadn’t been introduced.
“I’m Lynn Kent, Leo’s wife.”
Mia noticed her mom didn’t say ex-wife and wondered at that. She had, in fact, divorced Mia’s father several years after he’d taken off. She still used his last name, of course, and Mia wasn’t stupid. She knew her mom had never stopped loving him. Maybe in her eyes she still saw herself as Leo’s wife.
The doctor nodded and that’s when Mia knew. There was a tightness to his mouth and grim determination he couldn’t hide. Her father was dead. She didn’t need to be told.
She turned and took a couple of steps away even as the doctor spoke.
“I’m sorry, but we weren’t able to save him. Mr. Kent suffered a catastrophic cardiac event. I understand he was under the care of a physician for his heart?”
Mia heard Jax’s voice respond, but couldn’t make out his words. She felt like the ocean was roaring in her ears. She turned and walked back to the group, thinking this probably wasn’t something she should be missing, and almost wanting to laugh at the strange out-of-body feeling she had and the way her mind seemed to be functioning in slow motion.
She tuned out much of what they were saying as the doctor talked about the measures they’d taken to revive him. She didn’t miss the distress in Jax’s voice as he asked if earlier treatment could have saved him or why the doctor at the clinic hadn’t been able to see this coming the other day when Jax had taken him in.
The doctor didn’t seem to have many answers, explaining instead that oftentimes there was no warning and nothing that could have been done to save him. The look on Jax’s face told Mia he didn’t believe the man, that he’d be doing a lot of blaming aimed at himself over this.
The doctor gestured to the nurse hovering behind him. “Margaret will help you with the paperwork and get his effects for you. We’ll release the body to the funeral home of your choice once the proper paperwork has been completed.”
Her mother turned toward Jax. “He wanted to be cremated.”
Jax nodded.
“I’ll go see about the paperwork,” her mother said as the doctor walked away, and the nurse stepped into his place, leading her mom down the hall.
Jax stepped close to Mia, taking her hand and squeezing it. She looked up at him, startled at the contact.
“I’m sorry, Mia. I know you just found him.”
She lifted a shoulder and let it drop. “It’s not like I knew him.”
Warm eyes assessed her. “Why do you do that?”
“Do what?” She looked away, glancing to where her mom was talking to the nurse. Cremation, her mother had said. She guessed it made sense they would have talked about what they wanted when they were married. Her father had been away at war. There’d always been a very real possibility of his not coming home and her mother needing to plan a funeral.
“Pretend it doesn’t matter.”
She looked back to the man in front of her and schooled her features. She wasn’t having this conversation with a stranger, and most definitely not with this stranger.
“Because it doesn’t.” Mia turned and walked away. She’d wait for her mom in the parking lot, away from eyes that saw more than she wanted them to see.
* * *
Jax stood on one side of the emergency room gurney, while Lynn stood on the other side. She looked at Leo with such longing, such powerful love still evident in her eyes, and Jax was surprised to realize she still loved Leo.
Mia hadn’t come in to say goodbye to her father. Jax wondered if she would grow to regret that someday.
“I’m sorry, Lynn. If I’d known he was this sick …” Jax cut off as his voice broke. He felt like just minutes before he’d been sitting at his desk when the phone rang. How did this happen?
The laughter and life had left his friend’s face. They’d removed the breathing tube and IVs, but the evidence of the needles going into his arms was clear, and the devices stood nearby on a tray. There was a hopelessness to the discarded tools, as if they underscored the finality of what had happened.
Jax was no stranger to death. He’d seen death often and violently, but this still rocked him. Somehow a death unexpected was worse than even what he’d witnessed in conflict.
“Oh, honey,” she said, and Jax recognized the mother in her. It seemed all mothers knew how to comfort this way. “There wasn’t anything you could have done.”
He looked away. He didn’t know that, but he appreciated her trying to make him feel better.
Lynn was looking back at Leo now. “I had hoped—”
She didn’t finish the thought and Jax wondered if her hopes had been for her and Leo or Leo and Mia. Maybe both.
Chapter 9
“You’ll need to get more medication to Coleman.” The man didn’t bother to look through the data Sykes had handed him.
He carefully slipped the papers Coleman had sent him out of the envelope. He glanced at the data and set the envelope aside. He had more use for the envelope than the data.
“No problem.” Sykes nodded, standing in that hovering way he had, as if waiting to jump into action at any moment. If Sykes thought anything of the fact that he wore gloves, he didn’t question it.
At the start of their association, the man had thought Sykes was a yes man. It was why he’d chosen him. His connection to Simms Pharmaceutical had also helped, of course.
Now, he knew better. Coleman had called again. He was getting pressure from the police, from one of the homeless man’s friends. And Coleman was the type of man to crack under that pressure. He couldn’t have that. He’d have to address the situation before it went too far.
Sykes didn’t question the man the way Coleman did, and there were two reasons for that. The first was arrogance, a trait that often slayed men. It had once ruled him, in fact. The second was greed. They combined to make Sykes the perfect man for the job. He was too confident to thi
nk the man would never need him—to realize he was replaceable and expendable—and he was greedy enough to overlook a lot of things that might give another man pause.
“Triple the quantity for the next delivery and bring these instructions to the doctor.”
He printed off the directions and handed them over to Sykes.
Sykes looked at the sheet then frowned. “You sure about these numbers? That’s a big increase. I’m not sure I can produce it quickly enough to keep up this schedule.”
He looked at Sykes and raised his brows.
Sykes shrugged. “I’m just saying, I’ll need more money to make this happen. I’ll have to be producing around the clock unless you bring in someone else. If it’s just me getting the job done,” he lifted his chin, “I’m going to need more.”
He watched him long enough for Sykes to begin to squirm. He didn’t care about paying him more money. He just wanted Sykes to know he couldn’t make a habit of this.
He nodded. “Fine. Now get it done and get the meds to Coleman. I don’t have time to screw around.”
* * *
The memorial service was quiet and small. There were people from Jax’s office who’d come to support him, but the largest group of people were the fifteen or twenty men and women who’d known her father when they lived on the streets with him. They didn’t speak with anyone other than Jax, but their desire to pay their respects to the man she barely knew was clear.
She saw Jax speak quietly to each of them. They seemed to know him, and she wondered if he had helped a lot of them out, or if he’d simply known them through her dad. She still hadn’t found out how he knew her dad, and it occurred to her now that maybe he worked with a lot of homeless people in New Haven. Maybe he volunteered at the shelter or something along those lines. For all she knew, he might work there. She simply had no idea.