Lethal Temptations (Tempted #5)

by Janine Infante Bosco

  I came clean and gave him the truth… my truth, I loved Lace.

  And in turn he gave me her truth.

  My Lace was battling a disease she had no control over, and all the while she was trying to better me she was suffering in silence. I should’ve been the one helping her, giving her whatever she needed, supporting her the way she tried to support me.

  I was always looking to save her.

  I never thought she needed to be saved from herself.

  I never wanted to inflict that type of pain on her. I wanted to hurt her, yes, make her hate me because hating me kept her away and kept her safe. I never would’ve done it if I knew what my words could do to her.

  I’ve seen Jack go over the edge time and time again, sometimes it’s a great big event that pushes him other times it’s nothing. When the maker comes out and play there’s no rhyme or reason.

  “Petra, let’s go,” one of the C.O.’s demanded, grabbing my arm and pulling me onto my feet.

  She needs me and I’m not there.

  She needs me to right everything wrong I put in her head. She needs to know she’s more than what I let her think she was… she was fucking everything. She was my heart.

  “Let’s go!” he pulled my arm again, but I kept my feet firmly planted on the ground.

  “I want my phone call,” I demanded.

  And one more chance.

  Chapter Thirty-four

  I took three strides, swallowing up the floor space and braced my hands against the cement wall, breathing heavily as I tried not to scream in frustration. The cell door slammed shut behind me, echoing off the bare walls confining me to my memories. I cursed the day my demoralized self, had noticed Lacey as a woman. A goddamn woman with a tiny waist and hips meant to hold onto as I bent her over and appreciated the sweetest ass I ever laid eyes on. Not to mention tits that could make any man lose his mind.

  It was so fucking easy to lose my mind and forget my morals.

  Morals I still wasn’t sure I had in the first place.

  I curse the day she stopped being Jack’s daughter and became the object of my desire and my affection because it was all over from that point forward.

  I was too wrapped up in consuming her and feeding off her light to notice she was crying out for help. That night she came to the Dog Pound she wasn’t a girl looking for a man to pay her attention and take her virginity. No, Lacey was looking for someone to help her, someone to share her pain with.

  I waited for the C.O.’s to change shifts and then asked to use the phone. Things were different than they used to be, now you used your commissary money to make a call instead of calling collect and hoping it was accepted.

  The officer who brought me down to the call room was all right. He wasn’t a ball buster and didn’t give two fucks about anything but punching a clock and bringing home a paycheck. He wasn’t on a power trip, just a guy who worked as a correction officer because the city finally called his ass and offered him a job.

  “Take your time,” he said, turning his back and giving me some privacy.

  “Thanks, bro,” I called, picking up the phone and leaning my head against the wall trying to debate on what the fuck I would say. I wasn’t even sure I should call her after everything I said and everything I did. Being so close to Jack all these years I knew firsthand how delicate someone’s mind was when they were mentally ill. After a while I learned Jack’s trigger points and could avoid them. Lacey was different, for all I knew I was the trigger point, the thing that set her maker off. I wasn’t sure if calling her would cause her more harm than good.

  Then I picked up the phone and dialed the number of one person who could help guide me and wouldn’t turn her back on me. All I had to do was remind her of three words and a promise I made when we were dying.

  I waited, listened patiently as the phone rang and then her voice reached me. It was strange how a familiar voice could make you feel the repercussions of your actions and remind you of life on the outside, life beyond the prison cell.

  “Hello?”

  “You made me promise if we lived I’d tell you what Leather and Lace meant,” I rasped, clearing my throat to mask the emotion in my voice.

  “I’m still waiting,” Reina said softly. “Whenever you’re ready.”

  “I’m ready,” I swallowed. “It’s me and Lacey. It’s Lacey, she’s my Lace. She’s the face I pictured when we thought we would die. It’s her face I hung onto and wished to see again,” I admitted, letting out a ragged breath.

  “I know,” she confessed. “I’ve known since the hospital she was your reason, your why and your purpose,” she added.

  “Jack was here,” I started. “I told him the truth, Reina. You might want to prepare yourself for that ride,” I warned.

  “Blackie, you didn’t call me to warn me about Jack,” she coaxed.

  “No, I called you because I didn’t know who else to call. I’m stuck here when I should be there, with her, helping her through this shit. I’m calling you because I need to know she’s okay. I’m calling you because I need you to remind her I’m here and I’m begging her to hang on to those three words. I’m begging you to help me remind her of them.”

  “I’m sure she’d want to hear them from you and not me,” Reina said.

  “I don’t want to upset her,” I rasped.

  “Blackie, you want a reminder? Here’s a reminder. You told me to hang on because Jack needed me. You told me he loved me and I was the one who fixed him, made me believe I had to get back to him because I was what he needed most in this world,” she recalled. “Now do yourself a favor and make the call because the one thing Lacey needs most right now is hearing your voice remind her of everything she knows in heart but is too weak minded to hang on to.”

  I remained quiet as I soaked up her advice.

  “Are you there? Did you hear me? She needs you,” Reina called. “And in case you need another reminder, something to force you out of your own hell and bring you back to her, let me give you what you need to hear too…Leather and Lace. Make the call Blackie, and make it right, make it count,” she challenged.

  “I hear you,” I assured. “Thanks, Reina,” I added huskily.

  “Just returning the favor, my friend,” she replied.

  Make it right.

  Make it count.

  I could do that.

  Today was a big day for me. It’s my first day back at school and the first day I took the Lithium the doctor prescribed. Now, it’s a waiting game to see if it works or if we will have to adjust the dosage or possibly try a different medication. I’m confident that I’m going to kick my maker’s ass.

  Surviving the rest of this semester? That I’m not so sure about.

  “Everyone’s staring at me,” I whispered to Daniela as we walked to the campus store. I know my treatment with Dr. Spiegel is helping because I would be having an anxiety attack right about now, wondering what everyone was saying behind my back.

  I knew they were talking.

  I just didn’t care.

  Let them talk.

  “They’re not staring at you,” Daniela insisted. “And even if they are it’s not because of anything you did but because Brandon fooled everyone,” she added.

  I don’t know how true that is either. I overheard some girls talking in the bathroom. They think I’m the bitch who had her daddy’s motorcycle gang beat the fuck out of Brandon because I didn’t want to go down on him.

  People talk.

  They always do.

  Even when they don’t know what the fuck they’re talking about.

  After I overheard Riggs tell my father what he heard at the hospital I confided in Daniela, because sometimes you just want to talk to your girlfriends and not a shrink. She admitted that when she was making plans for that night, Brandon asked her if I would be there. Of course that led to a crying session with Daniela, where she blamed what happened to me on herself for a good two hours.

  The truth is, it would’ve
happened anyway, even if she didn’t invite him or tell him I was going.

  He’s still in the coma and every day he doesn’t wake up things become worse for Blackie. I wish I could see him or speak to him especially after what Riggs told my father. I wanted to thank him for what he did. I wanted to tell him how much I loved him and I wanted to tell him about everything that was going on with me.

  I didn’t even care if he told me how he felt.

  If he didn’t say a word.

  Just knowing he was listening was enough.

  Daniela and I grabbed a coffee and went to our next class. I pretended to be paying attention but my mind was elsewhere, busy dreaming of what could’ve been. It doesn’t look like we will get another chance at making our story work. If Brandon dies, Blackie’s sentence changes and he’s looking at murder.

  I’m waiting for my father to give the green light and have the lawyer escort me into the station so I can make a formal statement but talking to my father these days is a struggle. He won’t even look at me and has made it very clear that talking about Blackie is out of the question.

  A part of me wishes we never hid from him, maybe if he had gotten a chance to see us for himself he’d know it wasn’t something to frown upon. Sometimes the heart rules and if you’re lucky it lasts. I think if my father would’ve seen us follow our hearts straight into each other’s arms he might be a little more lenient. If he saw the ease of our relationship, the stolen moments that sparked a fire in our hearts, or if he would’ve seen us smiling whenever we were together than maybe Jack Parrish would understand Leather and Lace.

  No man will ever be good enough for me in his eyes but no man cared more about me than Blackie, even before we were anything, when we both thought we were nothing…even then we were still something.

  The other part of me is happy we kept our time to ourselves. For a short while we were on top of the world. All the sorrows and regrets of his past faded away and the trials and tribulations of my mind disappeared.

  I fell harder than I thought was possible and as I fell Blackie swooped in, claiming my heart. He gave me the broken pieces of his heart and with every kiss and every smile he asked me to put him back together.

  So what went wrong? He loved me. I know he did, hell even Riggs saw it. So why did he wound me with his words and break my heart? Was it because he didn’t have enough faith in himself? He should know by now I have enough faith in him for the both of us. He should know that he didn’t have to prove his worth to me. I believe when you love someone as hard and as fierce as I love Blackie, there is no reason to prove anything other than your commitment to that person. I believe, God creates a second half of your soul and puts it into someone else, if you’re lucky you cross paths with that person and get to be one half of a great love story. You become complete and a full heart and a mended soul is all the proof you need. You begin to write an epic love story, one you never saw coming but will always be thankful for.

  The words come freely.

  The actions speak for themselves.

  The love evolves without trying.

  It’s a rare form of beauty.

  Only the lucky ones get to experience.

  I was lucky for a little while.

  Then my luck ran out.

  But I had the story scribed into my heart and that would never run from me.

  My phone vibrated on top of my desk, pulling me away from the heartbreak and into the present creating a ruckus and all eyes turned around to see. I stared at the screen and saw it was an unknown caller.

  “Miss Parrish, do you need to take that?” My professor chastised.

  “Nope,” I smiled sheepishly, turning my phone on silent before I flipped it over and laid the screen against the desk. “I’m sorry.”

  I rolled my eyes at my classmates that continued to stare at me before I glanced down and pretended to take notes.

  I had no fucking clue what was going on but hey, I faked the good student like nobody’s business and continued to doodle until the professor called class.

  I grabbed my books, shoved them in my bag and followed everyone else out of the room. I turned the ringer back on as I walked down the hall and noticed the alert that I had a voicemail. I walked with Daniela into the parking lot, she went her way and I went mine. When I was inside the car, I pulled out the phone and stared at the screen, my thumb hovered over it before I played back the voicemail.

  “Lace, it’s me,” Blackie’s voice filled my car and my heart. I heard the gasp escape my lips as he paused, forcing me to check and see if that was the end of the message.

  “I’m…I don’t know where to start. I guess I’m calling because I want to hear your voice. I want to hear with my own ears you’re okay. All right, well I’ll try reaching you again later if they let me use the phone.”

  Another pause.

  “I miss you, Angel. I miss you like crazy and I keep picturing your pretty little face. So fucking pretty,” his voice trailed off and then I heard him clear his throat. “Hang in there, girl. I’ll try and call again, hopefully I’ll catch you,” he said before ending the voicemail.

  Chapter Thirty-five

  There comes a time in life when you’ve tried all you can and have no choice but to look up to a higher power to guide you. It’s usually when you’ve made a couple of wrong turns and you’ve lost your way. You have no idea where the fuck you are and don’t know where to go from here and instead of winging it you look for signs.

  I didn’t have to look too hard for my sign. It came right after I made the phone call to Lacey and she didn’t pick up. Her sweet voice filled my ears, my soul and the emptiness inside of me since I pushed her away. I contemplated hanging up and not leaving a message at all but I couldn’t do it. I physically couldn’t do it anymore.

  I folded.

  The dealer had one card left, and it wasn’t a queen.

  I had already passed that one up.

  I left the message and now I’m left regretting I didn’t put it all out there for her. I told her I missed her and that I wanted her to hang in there but I should’ve told her I loved her. I should’ve told her I made a mistake and I’ll spend every day regretting the one day when I pushed her away. It was foolish, so fucking foolish. I have never doubted my ability to protect her, not once, not since I vowed to Jack I’d do whatever it takes to make sure she was always okay. I gave my brother, peace of mind when they closed the cell doors on his ass, I gave him my word I’d always put her before me.

  When my truck blew up, and we had to put the club on lockdown I volunteered to grab Lacey because I trusted myself with her life more than I trusted Jack.

  That’s a fact.

  It’s funny what you realize when all you have is three walls and prison bars to stare at all day…your mind is constantly working.

  I could’ve taken care of Boots. I could’ve put that motherfucker to sleep and avoided all this shit but, I didn’t think. I was too wrapped up in the consequences, worried about the club and all the drama we already had brewing with the Chinese.

  For the first time in my life I had something I was scared of losing. Never felt that way before. Not even with Christine. It fucked me up, and I lost my way.

  I fucked up the rewrite.

  “Let’s go Petra,” the C.O. called, jingling his keys against the metal bars.

  I lifted my head off my cot and looked over at him as he unlocked my cell.

  “Let’s go where?”

  “Visitor,” he muttered. “Well come on, I don’t have all day,” he hissed. I threw my legs over the side of the bed and rose to my feet. No one’s come up to see me since Jack visited two weeks ago. I at least expected a visit from Pipe or Wolf if not to keep me in the loop with the club than to rip me a new asshole for my affair with Lacey. I’m sure Jack’s spreading that shit like wild fire, as he plots my demise.

  I don’t want to believe that he’ll leave me here to rot. I want to think that despite everything he remembers we’re broth
ers by choice, and I’ve always had his back and always will. I didn’t plan on falling in love with his daughter. I didn’t plan ahead and he of all people knew that. He’s the one who has pleaded with me frequently to find my heart and live again.

  Careful what you wish for Bulldog.

  Shouldn’t have given me her life.

  He made her mine without even realizing it.

  He put her in front of me and asked me to live again.

  I listened to him, opened my eyes and there she was.

  An angel tempting the devil.

  I was buzzed into the visitor’s room and scanned the perimeter searching for the reaper and whoever was wearing it. I glanced over my shoulder at the C.O.

  “I see no one I know,” I told him, turning around. He placed hand on my chest and tipped his chin over my shoulder.

  “Look again,” he ordered.

  I turned around and this time when I searched the room I didn’t look for leather and mayhem, I searched until I found my queen.

  Eyes dark as the night met mine.

  All the noise faded.

  And the people crowding the room seemed to disappear.

  It was just her.

  My angel.

  I started for her as she pushed back her chair and slowly rose to her feet.

  Face to face.

  Here we were again.

  Leather and Lace.

  Just when you think you’re done. That you’ve lost everything and you have nothing left, nowhere else to go, that higher ground shakes things around and gives you a new path.

  I was staring my path in the eyes and the future never looked so bright.

  I was a man behind bars, with no release date, not even sentenced yet but, still a man who had a future.

  That pretty face was my future.

  “What’re you doing here?” I asked, finding my voice as we stood across from one another with the table between us. Her eyes scanned me, zeroing in on my inmate number before finding mine again.

  “I’m visiting my favorite Knight,” she whispered, offering me a smile as she cocked her head to the side. “What do you think I’m doing here? I miss you.”