Kharmic Rebound

by Yeager, Aaron

  Ilrica punched her fist into her palm. “Exactly! I’m so glad someone else around here gets it. If you’re not strong enough to enforce your rule, then you don’t have the right to make a rule in the first place.”

  “Yes,” Trahzi added. “And then they wonder why their rules mean so little to us. It is perplexing, like watching an ant yell at a giant boot striding past, demanding the boot give it the right of way.”

  Ilrica laughed. “Yes, but it is a lot of fun to tease them when they yell.”

  “Tease?”

  “Oh yeah. Are you kidding? It’s a ton of fun to make them blue in the face. I’ll teach you how when we get back. I find it helps keep me from getting too irritated at them.”

  Trahzi appreciated the offer. “All right.”

  Ilrica put some more meat in the air pocket and then glanced over at Trahzi. “You know, you’re all right, Trahzi.”

  “I also approve of your company, although I notice that I do not feel a romantic attraction to you like I do for Gerald.”

  “I’m glad,” Ilrica laughed.

  Trahzi pulled out a cable from her belt and plugged it into her neck, offering the other end to Ilrica.

  “What’s that?”

  “Now that we are friends, shall we synchronize our memories?”

  Ilrica raised an eyebrow. “You mean, I copy my memories into you, and you copy yours into me, making us both basically identical copies of one another, a mix of who we each used to be?”

  “Yes.”

  Ilrica shrugged. “Yeah sure, why not?”

  Trahzi brightened up. “Really?”

  “NO! Of course not!”

  * * *

  “What can I do for you, my daughter?” High Priest K’Bheziss asked, lighting an incense stick with his plump fingers.

  I am not your daughter, Cha’Rolette corrected.

  K’Bheziss chuckled, causing his jowls to shake. “It’s just something we saw in my order.” He motioned for her to take a seat before his throne.

  No, it’s a negotiating tactic, she said, standing alongside the chair. A way of establishing a hierarchy between us with you at the top. It places me in a position to make requests from you, and you to grant them to me.

  K’Bheziss didn’t chuckle that time. “And yet, you are here to make a request, are you not?”

  Not at all. I am here to make a purchase.

  This caught the old lizard’s attention. She watched him with some satisfaction as he tried to hide his lust. “I imagine a Ssykes would not come personally if the amount were insignificant,” he said, licking his scaly lips with a purple tongue.

  Cha’Rolette floated over and plucked up a berry and placed it in her mouth, savoring it with her luscious lips. When she purred a little at the flavor, she caught him oogling her from the corner of her eye.

  I’ve been around Gerald so long, I’d forgotten how easy it is to manipulate normal men, she thought to herself. I don’t even need my powers to bend this guy.

  Cha’Rolette floated before him. I am here because this is a sensitive issue for me. One of my employees is a neophyte in your order. His name is Gerald Dyson.

  K’Bheziss frowned. “Oh, him.”

  “He has plans to take out his vows next week. I need to have them modified.”

  “Modified?” K’Bheziss chuckled. “You can’t modify the Oathstone Ritual.”

  Of course you can. Everything has a price, I just need to know what this request’s price is.

  K’Bheziss shook his head, his fat cheeks flapping. “Some things are not for sale.”

  Oh, please. Don’t try to be coy with me, holy man. There’s no need to stand on ceremony, no call to impress anyone. I am not one of your disciples, this is strictly business.

  She pointed around the room. Your robes are made from Saurian silk, your throne enriched ruteriam, these rugs on the floor are Bolian antiques, that mural on the wall is an Ylian original, your goblet fifty percent pure latinum. Those are organic gavaberries on your tray, along with fresh kutra bread, baked this morning half a sector away. The contents of your office are worth 3.212 million credits at this morning’s market value. So, please don’t stand there and tell me that there are rules you cannot make exception to.

  K’Bheziss sat his swollen haunches down on his throne, irritated. “The goblet is one hundred percent latinum,” he corrected.

  Cha’Rolette picked up the ornate vessel and flicked it with her finger. It gave off a sour note.

  Fifty percent, she appraised.

  “Then I suppose I shall have a word with the Merchant’s Guild in the morning.”

  There was a chime at the door, and it slid open.

  “Forgive the intrusion, high priest, but your wife is on the wave. She says it is urgent,” the priest reported deferentially.

  Cha’Rolette spun around, her eyes wide. Wait, your WHAT?

  * * *

  Gerald looked on happily as Kalia cooked lunch for her father in the palace kitchen. Kalia impaled a cantaloupe on one finger, then spun her wrist around at high speeds. Using her blade like a lathe, she took off the peel, then tossed the fruit up into the air. Glowing wires extended out from her fingers and she gave three quick swipes. Perfectly sliced pieces landed in her frying pan. She split her arms and legs into eight limbs, sautéing the mushrooms, chopping the fresh herbs, adding the spices, dicing the peppers. She used quick controlled bursts from her lasers to tenderize the meat. She flipped out her flamethrower and gave the contents a beautiful caramelized searing, then slid the finished chutney onto a plate and placed it before Admiral Greir, who applauded and praised her.

  The door slid open and Cha’Rolette floated in.

  There you are.

  She settled next to Gerald and they watched as Kalia and her father ate together. They were all smiles.

  “It’s amazing,” Gerald said, admiration in his eyes. “After everything that young lady has been through, after everything that was done to her, she can still find the strength to smile. I don’t know how she does it.”

  Cha’Rolette’s eyes softened and she smiled at Gerald. This was what she loved about him. In a universe filled with greedy sycophants, she had found a man that knew no greater joy than helping others find happiness.

  She does it the way we all do, she said, adoration in her eyes. By holding close to those we care for.

  Gerald smiled at her. Just seeing it made her heart flutter.

  They watched as Kalia kissed her father on the forehead and ran over to the pantry, gathering together some ingredients for dessert.

  I can’t believe you taught her to cook, Cha’Rolette said, shaking her head.

  “I know it seems a little silly,” Gerald said as he watched. “I just wanted to help her view her body in a new way. To help her stop thinking of herself as a weapon.”

  Cha’Rolette looked over at Trahzi, who was feeding the puppy a bottle and rocking her to sleep, gently singing. She looked over at Ilrica, who was sitting with the Bertulf delegation, sharing stories and laughing wildly as they all drank pints of powerful foaming ussah beer. Zurra was sitting with them, laughing along.

  Cha’Rolette uncurled the fingers of her left hand and took Gerald’s hand in hers. No it’s perfect. You did what you always do. You took an assassin and turned her into a chef. You took a demon and turned her into a mother. You took an outcast and made her into a hero. You took a refugee with a broken heart, and helped her find peace.

  She turned to him and looked down bashfully. And you took a soulless business woman like me and gave her a heart.

  Gerald blushed. It nearly made her melt to look at it. “I didn’t do anything. You were always a good person inside.”

  She looked up at him with her lovely jade eyes. That’s very kind of you to say. It’s completely incorrect, and embarrassingly naïve, but it’s very sweet of you to say.

  Cha’Rolette tugged on his hand. Come on.

  “What?”

  Just come on, I have something pr
epared for you.

  Gerald raised a suspicious eyebrow.

  She giggled. You’re going to like it, I promise. Just come on.

  “This better not be another private tutor.”

  No, it’s not. Just, follow me.

  She led him down into a lavish conference room, refurnished just for this occasion. Cascading water fell down the carved stone walls, giving the appearance of delicate waterfalls. A solid hardwood table ran the length of the room, each place setting furnished with documents, refreshments, contract packets, and network plugs. The entire place absolutely buzzed with anti-recording devices.

  “Who are these guys?” Gerald asked warily at the rows of men and women, dressed in business suits so fine he dare not even breathe for fear of damaging them and incurring a debt it would take a lifetime to pay off.

  Oh, them? Just Ssykes family lawyers, notaries, official record-keepers, pay them no mind.

  “How can I not?” he wondered as he was seated at the head of the table. He felt completely out of place. While a bodyguard checked him for weapons or recording devices, a secretary brought up a retinal scanner.

  “Ah, it’s probably best that we verify my identity in another way,” Gerald warned. The secretary looked to Cha’Rolette for confirmation, then took his hand print and a blood sample instead. Gerald said a silent prayer that his DNA data didn’t somehow code for a plague or something like that.

  “Um, this all looks really official,” Gerald said nervously.

  Cha’Rolette took out a piece of paper and began writing on it. That’s because it is.

  There was a pounding at the door, and the stone opened inward. Trahzi, Ilrica, Zurra and Kalia were standing out in the corridor, looking decidedly unhappy.

  “Excuse me, this is a private meeting,” one of the Ssykes men explained, interposing himself.

  “You have had enough time alone with Gerald since your return,” Trahzi said. “If he is here we wish to be as well.”

  How did you find him so quickly?

  Trahzi extended a black fingernail, coating it with purple and black energies. She plunged it into Gerald’s neck, and pulled out a small glowing amber wisp. “Gerald still had a piece of me within him.”

  Gerald rubbed his neck. “Ow.”

  Cha’Rolette tucked a ringlet behind her ear. Ah. Well that explains his reluctance to initiate physical intimacy yesterday.

  Ilrica snickered. “Gerald, initiate? Are we talking about the same person here, or have you found some other Gerald, one with an actual backbone?”

  “I prefer to think of it as being a gentlemen,” Gerald defended himself.

  “I’d prefer you acted more like you did in Cuffs and Candles.”

  “That wasn’t me!”

  Kalia tugged on Gerald’s sleeve. “What is Cuffs and Candles?” she whispered.

  “It’s best you not know,” he whispered back.

  “Gerald’s always been like this, so I don’t see why you were surprised,” Zurra said.

  Cha’Rolette snickered and raised an eyebrow, indicating that she knew something the rest didn’t. It made them uneasy.

  More Ssykes bodyguards appeared. “Shall we remove them, Duchess?”

  “As if you could,” Trahzi warned.

  Cha’Rolette sighed. Very well, you may have a seat.

  Zurra brightened up. “What, really?”

  Yes, it will be more efficient this way. Rather than settling accounts with each of you in turn I can do so all at once.

  “I’m not sure I like the sound of that,” Ilrica said.

  Space was made for them at the table, and the stone doors were aetherically sealed.

  How is your father? Cha’Rolette asked. Shouldn’t you be with him?

  “He is taking a nap right now,” Kalia said. I guess keeping him up for two days straight was a little too much.”

  I see.

  While the secretary ran retinal scans, the lawyers handed Gerald and each of the girls an encrypted tablet for them to sign.

  “What is this?” Ilrica asked, holding it by one corner as if it were a dirty diaper.

  Special non-disclosure and arbitration agreement. Nothing we discuss here can leave the room. Failure to comply will result in fines, property confiscation, and jail time. Nothing too complicated. I can have a version made with simple words only if you prefer.

  Ilrica stuck her tongue out.

  “What if we don’t want to sign it?” Zurra asked, reading through it.

  Cha’Rolette grinned. Then you can leave me alone here with Gerald.

  Zurra puffed her lips and reluctantly signed the contract. The other girls did so as well.

  Once they were handed in, the legal team gave Cha’Rolette the go ahead signal. The lights dimmed, and several dozen windows appeared around the Duchess as she floated to the front of the room.

  What you are about to see is extremely sensitive material. These are not the books we show to the taxing agencies, these are not even the books we hide for overzealous investigators to find when they realize the first set of books are fake. No, what you are seeing here is the actual financial breakdown of Ssykes Industries and all of the sub-companies that fit under the Ssykes corporate umbrella. Only a handful of people in the galaxy have ever seen this information.

  The windows scrolled and flipped, revealing information at a staggering pace. Ilrica and Kalia were fascinated. Zurra was confused. Trahzi was bored. Gerald couldn’t make sense of any of it.

  Item one, net worth: As you can see, most of the foundries and companies Ssykes is known for, while profitable, mainly act as a front to launder funds from the real businesses, which are primarily spice, illegal gambling, black market smuggling, illegal arms sale, and virtual drugs. My plan is to remove Ssykes Industries from these extralegal ventures, switch our spice production facilities over to geneto-medicines and nano-meds, and restructure our virtual drug development facilities over to government contracts for developing educational programs. Traditional classrooms will soon be a thing of the past, and I plan for Ssykes to claim the lion’s share of what replaces it. Senator Immestria heads up the Senate Education Council, and I have already laid the foundation with him. I also plan to reduce our reliance on heavy weapons manufacture. Within a decade after I take over the family, Ssykes Industries will be a completely legitimate business. All our profits will be above the table.

  “But why are you doing this?” Gerald asked.

  “Do you expect to increase profits this way?” Zurra inquired.

  Actually, I project this restructuring will reduce our gross profits by nearly half. However, when you take into account the inordinate amounts of money we currently spend to bribe and purchase protection from local and federal officials, the hit is not quite as bad as that.

  Ilrica kicked up her feet on the table, knocking over a water glass and irritating the lawyer next to her by batting him with her tail. “But surely you can’t make this kind of unilateral decision all on your own. How do you expect to convince the other heads of the families?”

  What good is having a fortune if you are not free to spend it? Going legit means no more looking over our shoulders, no more worry about jail time. Peace of mind and a good night’s sleep is wealth in and of itself.

  “But you still haven’t answered my question,” Gerald pressed.

  Quite right. She looked at Gerald and smiled warmly. I’m doing this for Gerald. So he doesn’t have to be a part of something shameful.

  Everyone could see how much the gesture meant to him.

  Cha’Rolette caught herself blushing and continued the presentation. Ah, next is item two:

  The windows shifted to pictures of the five girls from various angles. As you can see, I’ve run our physical appearances through the usual filters. Body symmetry analytics, the Hyneman test, the Bomahlan checksum, the Gleeu and Flagmatag criterion. Objectively, as you can see, the results are quite conclusive, of the four of us vying for Gerald’s affections, I am by far the most ph
ysically attractive.

  “Hey!” Zurra protested.

  “The trakk you are!” Ilrica yelled. “You have no fur! You have no tail! You’re like a bald amputee!”

  “Five of us,” Kalia said firmly.

  Everyone looked at her.

  Kalia brushed back her dreadlocks nervously. “What? I also love Gerald. I should be included.”

  Not flirting with her, eh? Cha’Rolette said, giving Gerald a stern glance. Very well.

  Cha’Rolette ran the programs anew and updated the results. Gerald placed his face in his hands.

  “How did I score behind Kalia?” Zurra complained.

  “Because you are a big goo monster,” Ilrica said.

  Kalia seemed pleased that she was now ranked second.

  “Did you bring us all together just to boast?” Trahzi accused.

  This is not a boast, it is simply good breeding. The heads of the Ssykes family have chosen the most physically attractive spouses for hundreds of generations. My physical beauty is a natural result of that. Her eyes dropped down a little. It is something that was manufactured... like a product.

  Gerald could see a little sadness in her eyes when she said that. She quickly covered it up.

  I make no ownership to my beauty. It is not something I earned myself, but Gerald is a man and such things are important to men, so I have included it in the proposal.

  “What?” Gerald asked, a little offended.

  Item number three: As a telepath, I bring to the table nearly limitless pleasure and intimate physical possibilities for my husband. I have been trained in Kasa’Luma, the famous Issaguardian art of sensuality. I can not only stimulate the pleasure centers of the brain directly, and make him experience fantasies that are indistinguishable from reality, I can also use my kinetic powers to...

  She noticed that Gerald was turning bright red with embarrassment.

  ...but I know that such discussion tends to make Gerald somewhat distressed, so I will skip over the details for now. Ahem. Item four...

  Ilrica raised her hand. “Um, just how many items are there to this presentation?”

  Fifty-three.

  The girls gasped. “You found fifty-three reasons why you are better for Gerald than the rest of us?” Zurra whined.