Time Travel 02 Nothing but Time

by Angeline Fortin

  “So, what are you saying?” Kate thrilled at his words, absorbing the long-awaited admission that this physical attraction between them was mutual, that he simply wanted her as she wanted him. Not that she truly needed the verbal admission; his gaze was hot with want burning her where she stood.

  He was feeling it as well. Kate could feel the desire radiating from him, could see the test of his self-control in the way he kept his hands clasped firmly behind his back. “I’m saying that there is a large margin between showing affection and disrespect. Between maintaining one’s reputation and risking all.”

  “How big is that margin?” Kate whispered in a trembling voice.

  “I should like to find out,” he told her softly, his voice low and husky with reined in desire that sent a quiver of anticipation running through Kate’s core.

  Though his locked hands were still behind his back, Kate could feel the caress in his eyes that she knew his fingers longed to express more physically. Swallowing deeply, Kate held back her own impulse to throw her arms around him and kiss him right there amidst the crowd of spectators even knowing the spectacle they would make. Public displays of affection in this place would certainly garner more attention than they would in her time. “When?”

  “Soon,” he promised roughly. “With Ramble House full of guests…”

  “Well just don’t wait too long, okay?” she whispered softly, wavering faintly under the intensity of lust that was growing in his eyes. The hottest fires burned with a blue flame and that was what she felt in that fiery gaze, scorching heat licking across her skin. She could feel it like a physical caress. Reaching behind her, she gripped the mossy brick of the inn to steady herself. Never had Kate felt such overwhelming passion as she felt with Brand, certainly without ever having a finger laid upon her.

  “I doubt I could even if…”

  Chapter Twenty-Eight

  “Harrowby?” A soft voice cut through the cocoon that surrounded them and the pair jumped back to find Brand’s sister looking upon them curiously.

  “Susan.” Brand nodded curtly, stepping away from Kate as casually as he could. “I hadn’t thought you would be here today.”

  His sister looked down at her mourning attire. “I’m not officially. I had thought since you and Mother would be occupied by the races and the guests that I might…”

  Perceptively, Kate saw the hope clearly written in the mother’s eyes. “Lord Harrowby was just suggesting a more advantageous location from which to watch the remaining races, Mrs. Ralston. Would you care to join us? Nathan would love to have you join us for the remainder of the afternoon.”

  Though Kate knew the woman wasn’t buying her explanation for Kate’s long coze with Harrowby, Mrs. Ralston nodded. “I should like that, Miss Kallastad. Thank you.”

  “I shall bid you farewell then, ladies.” Brand nodded coolly. “I must return to the club and change anyway. Susan. Miss Kallastad.”

  Kate watched Brand turn and stride nobly through the crowd feeling his sister’s inquisitive stare all the while. “Shall we? Nathan is just there waiting for me.” Kate pointed to the bridge where Brand had stopped to pull Nathan off the rail once more and give his farewells to his nephew before crossing the bridge toward the Leander Club on the other side of the river.

  “Kate!” Nathan called as they approached, stepping up on the lower edge of the rail once more to lean over the side. “Look at the ducks!”

  “Oh, for cute!” Kate cooed as the baby ducklings paddled furiously after their mother. It was a sight she had seen a million times growing up, sending another wave of nostalgia for home through her. This time may have its ups in the form of one Brandon Ryder, but it still wasn’t where she belonged.

  “Good morning, Mother,” Nathan added as he noticed Kate’s companion.

  “Good morning, Nathan,” Susan replied softly. “Are you enjoying your day?”

  “Yes, but Uncle Brandon didn’t win the race.”

  “Perhaps he’ll win his next one.” Nate’s mother turned to Kate. “And you, Miss Kallastad, how are you liking the regatta?”

  Kate could see the curiosity in the woman’s eyes, knew there were questions there that she longed to ask but was simply too polite to do so. “I’m having a good time, Mrs. Ralston. I think… damn! Nathan! Watch out! Shit.”

  Nathan had again been straddling the railing. As the crowd backed away from a passing carriage, they crowded the railing and jostled Nathan. Losing his balance and his grip on the railing, with a squeal of terror, he tipped over the side of the bridge and into the Thames below. Susan screamed as well as they rushed to the rail. “Nathan! Help! He can’t swim!”

  Shouts sounded from around them but no one acted immediately. None of the gentlemen leaning over the rail seemed inclined to get their clothes wet for the sake of an anonymous child. “Shit,” Kate muttered again, lifting her skirts to climb the rail herself. With a quick glance down at her student’s floundering form, she leapt off to the side so she wouldn’t hit him on the way down. It was a long fall and it seemed to Kate that an eternity passed before she plunged into the rush of cold water. Exhaling as she worked her way back to the surface, Kate heard the continued shouts from above as she broke through.

  “Nathan!” she called, glancing around her calmly before seeing Nathan sputtering and slapping ineffectually at the water close by. “I gotcha!”

  Kate wrapped an arm around the little boy’s waist as they both went under once more and kicked hard to bring them both back to the surface. Looking up, she could see Susan leaning over the rail of the bridge stretching desperately to reach them as she cried her son’s name repeatedly. Kate proceeded to tow him to the shore aware that her skirts were tangling around her legs as she swam. She kicked harder, futilely trying to free her legs, thankful that two other men were now jumping in to come to her assistance. Fast running out of strength, Kate pushed Nate upward, attempting to launch him toward the nearest rescuer.

  Rebounding from the upward thrust, Kate was sucked back under by the pull of the river. Using all her strength, Kate clawed her way to the surface once more, gasping for breath. Her legs were beginning to burn; the long layered skirts of her gown were a heavy weight that was dragging her down as her energy flagged. She looked up through the water, the light of the sun dancing through the waves, as she was pulled deeper. Just as her body begged her to give up, a strong hand grabbed her arm and pulled her up the rest of the way. Brand was there, wrapping a muscular arm around her waist and helping her stay above the water.

  “Kate, the water is logging your skirts. They’re weighing you down!” he shouted into her face above the raucous noise of slashing water and the continued shouts of the gathered onlookers.

  “Ya think?” Kate screeched back at him with renewed vigor. Swearing under her breath, she reached under the water to pull her billowing skirts up trying to get under them. The best thing she could do to help him was to untie the petticoats that were the worst of the weight but the waterlogged strings would not come undone.

  Fatigued, Kate did her best to aid in Brand’s efforts as he towed her to a public dock in front of the inn and lifted her into the waiting hands of those who had gathered to help. She rolled onto the dock as Brand pulled himself up beside her. Cheek pressed to the wood, Kate coughed up water and gasped for breath. “Nathan?”

  “He’s here, Kate, never fear,” Brand told her and Kate cracked an eye to find Nathan sobbing in the arms of his mother. Relieved, she closed her eyes, panting hard and trying to find her breath as the voices of the gawkers gathered around rose and fell in exclamations and retelling of the moment to those just arriving.

  Geez, Kate thought, that is unquestionably not how I want to go in the end! She felt strong arms helping her into a sitting position and Kate accepted a handkerchief that was dangled before her stinging eyes to wipe the water from her face. She looked up to find Brand hovering over her looking desperately as if he wanted to take her in his arms. Kate wanted him to as
well. She was shaken to the core by what had just happened and wanted – no, needed – the comforting strength of his arms around her. She fought the urge to fling herself at him. Wouldn’t that just be a sight to titillate the masses! “It’s okay,” she whispered unevenly. “I’m okay.”

  “How can you be so calm?”

  Kate shrugged with a half-hearted smile. “It’s what I do.”

  Brand ground his teeth, frustration evident, before he turned and began barking out brisk commands to the people around him calling for his carriage and a doctor to be found and brought around.

  “That was a very brave thing you did, miss.”

  Kate turned toward the speaker of those gruff words to find the burly, bearded man who had taken Nathan to safety squatting by her side.

  Shrugging off his compliment, Kate said sincerely, “I wouldn’t have been able to make it back with him alone. Thank you so much for your help.”

  “Couldn’t’ve saved you both though.” He shook his head regretfully. “Good thing his lordship came to ‘elp.”

  If Brand hadn’t heard the commotion on the bridge and returned… a shudder ran through Kate. Whether it was Brand’s own heroic nature or merely the earl’s duty for the people of Oxford, she was glad he’d been compelled to help. A few minutes more, the weight of the skirts would have pulled her down to watery death. “Yes, it was a very good thing.”

  Susan looked up to express her thanks as well when Nathan pulled away to throw himself into Kate’s arms. She took the sobbing boy into her arms knowing that he was likely terrified by what had happened, overcome with emotion. “There, there,” she crooned cradling him against her. “You’re all right, I’m all right. I’d wager that you’re not likely to climb on the railings again, are you?”

  Instead of comforting him, Kate’s teasing words seemed only to compound Nathan’s panic. Frowning, Kate gave him another squeeze. “It’s okay Nathan, really.”

  “I don’t want you to die, Kate,” he bawled. “Not like Papa did.”

  Comprehension dawned. Of course, a boy who grieved as deeply as Nathan had would dread the death of another in his life. Kate was the closest thing he had to a friend right now and she imagined he feared losing her as much as he did his mother or uncle. She felt her heart breaking for him. Death was hard on children who couldn’t truly understand the loss, wondering if one would lead to another and another until they were left alone.

  Looking up, she found Susan looking helplessly at them with tears trailing down her cheeks and Kate could read the pain combined with envy in her eyes. Whispering into Nathan’s ear, Kate said, “Go to your mom now, Nate. She needs to know her son is alive and well, too.”

  Nathan looked up, sniffed and then threw himself back into his mother’s waiting arms.

  Wishing for a strong embrace to squeeze away her own lingering fears, Kate instead sat at the end of the dock and wrung out her skirts as best she could, waiting until she heard Brand’s aristocratic tones once again commanding the crowd to back away. Just knowing he was back within reach bolstered Kate’s spirit. She waited as he lifted Nate into his arms and helped his sister to her feet before handing Susan’s son back to her and directing them to the waiting carriage. Then it was her turn. Brand held out his hand to help her rise and Kate grasped it, held it, as she stood. His calloused hands rubbed hers, squeezing surreptitiously under the guise of steadying her. “Do you need any assistance, Miss Kallastad?”

  Though Kate would have liked nothing more than to have Brand sweep her into his arms and carry her off, she just shook her head and followed Susan to the carriage. She climbed in, taking the seat opposite Nathan and Susan. As if unseen forces were answering her ardent prayers, after a moment’s hesitation, Brand climbed in as well. “You’re coming, too?”

  “I’d like the doctor’s assurances that Nathan wasn’t harmed at all,” he answered meeting her gaze, his fears and worries clearly written there. “I’d like to make certain that you are well, also.”

  Unable to help herself, Kate reached out and squeezed his hand feeling the strong warmth of his skin under her chilled fingers. She couldn’t imagine that he was aware of his actions when he took her icy hand between his two and chafed it to warm her.

  Catching his sister’s eye, Kate pulled her hand away slowly. It wouldn’t do give credence to rumors before they even had a chance to begin!

  “I can never thank you enough, Miss Kallastad.” Susan spoke at last, her voice tight with emotion. “You acted without thought for your own safety to save my son.”

  “It was nothing,” Kate waved her thanks away. “I’m sure you were about to do the same.”

  A breathless huff escaped Mrs. Ralston. “I fear I cannot swim at all. I was terribly aware that all I might have provided my son was a quicker drowning. Thank God for your cool head.”

  “That’s me, Cool Kate.” Another sob escaped Nathan and Kate turned her attention to him. “Nathan, listen to me,” Kate said in a firm tone lifting his chin until his eyes met hers. “Don’t treat this as such a tragedy. It was an accident and now it’s over.”

  “But you could have died!”

  A sad smile jerked at the corner of her mouth that his worry was not for his own demise but for hers. “People die all the time, Nathan. You can’t worry and fret about it. It’s how the world works. You cannot stop it but only hope that you’ve lived life to the fullest before your time is up and you move on.”

  “To Heaven?”

  “Perhaps.”

  “Mama says that Papa has gone to Heaven,” Nate sniffed. “Do you think when I go to Heaven I will see him there?”

  “I don’t know, Nate,” Kate replied, casting pleading looks at both Brand and Susan but neither came to her rescue in this instance. “Maybe you will but you can’t live your whole life waiting for that to happen. Have you ever heard of the phrase Carpe diem?” Nathan shook his head. “It means seize the day. Live in the now. Don’t live in the past thinking what might have been or think about what will happen someday far in the future. You’re nine years old and you have your entire life waiting for you to live it.”

  “But I miss my Papa!” he wailed.

  “Oh, I miss mine, too, buddy.” Kate reached out and squeezed him tight with tears burning her eyes. “But you can’t spend all your time missing him and he wouldn’t want you to do that either. Neither would my dad. He would expect me to face the facts and accept that he’s gone. He’d expect me to get out there and live one hell of a life that’s worth living and I bet that’s what your Papa would want for you, too.”

  Nate sniffled and wiped his nose on his sleeve. “Do you really think so?”

  “Dads only want you to be happy, Nate,” she assured him, unaware that tears were streaking down her cheeks and Susan’s as well. “It’s what they do. Life is unpredictable, you know. No one will be around forever. I know you’re only a kid, but you’ve learned that lesson the hard way already. Someday, maybe sooner than you’d want, I’ll be gone or your mom or your Uncle Brand. You never know when your time is up, right?” He nodded, sniffling once again. “You can’t live a real life when you’re worrying everyday that someone you love will be taken from you. If I had drowned today, I’d want to know that you’re not going to be sad forever, but that you’d go out there and live it up every day. Embrace the time you’ve got, all right?”

  “All right.”

  Brand held a handkerchief out to her and Kate took it to wipe the boy’s face. Looking up at Brand, Kate met his eyes and saw the pride and satisfaction in his gaze.

  They reached Ramble House in short order and servants flooded from the house to assist them. Taking Nathan in his arms, Brand carried his nephew away delivering clipped orders for his care to Janice who scurried behind him. Kate knew why he left so quickly and understood. He could not risk showing unreasonable concern for her with the eyes of so many upon them.

  Lifting her sodden skirts the best she could, Kate climbed down only to find that the hand wa
iting there to assist her was not a footman’s or even the butler’s but Susan Ralston’s. “Thank you, Miss Kallastad.”

  “You’ve already thanked me, Mrs. Ralston,” Kate demurred.

  “Not for saving my son though, as I said, I will be eternally grateful.” Susan gripped Kate’s hand between her own small ones. “I want to thank you for those words about Nathan’s father and your own. In all these months of silence, the times I tried to explain death to Nathan, and I did try, I could never make him understand that grief was not what Charles would have wanted.” The older woman drew Kate into her arms and hugged her ignoring Kate’s protests about her wet clothing.

  Softening, Kate returned the embrace before stepping back. “He is learning to celebrate life again, Mrs. Ralston. In the end, this scare might even have been a way to demonstrate it more fully. I’m no grief counselor but I will talk to him some more and perhaps when he does lose someone again, it won’t be so hard on him.”

  “I’m so glad we have you, Miss Kallastad.” Mrs. Ralston hugged her quickly once more.

  “Please, call me Kate.”

  “And I’m Susan from now on,” came the response as Susan put an arm around Kate’s shoulders and turned her toward the door. “You should get out of those wet clothes and into a hot bath. I’d wager Harrowby has already ordered one for you.”