Vicissitude Yang Side

by Destine Williams

  “Mai, you’re not a failure.” I reach for her hand again.

  An inhuman growl rumbles from Mai. She slaps my hand away. “Leave me alone!”

  I recoil back from her. “Mai—”

  “GET OUT!” She roars.

  Wordlessly, I get up and back towards the door. I put a hand on the knob, but not before looking at her. “Even though I haven’t had my mom all this time, I never missed her that badly because you were always there.” My throat clots with tightness. “But I guess that doesn’t mean anything to you.”

  If my words do, Mai is very good at not showing it.

  Much of the afternoon is quiet. Tiff sits on the couch with me, filling out paperwork for her new position and occasionally glancing at the weather. Tamotsu, on the other hand, has taken over as Mai’s placater. Genji isn’t here, nor is he picking up his phone. It’s evening when I get the call from Shig telling me that he’s outside and I’m more than happy to finally have something else to do; I don’t think I could stand another minute in the house.

  Standing next to his black truck, Shig exhales a smoky plume. “What’s got you looking so down in the dumps?”

  I get in the passenger seat. “Mai won’t listen. She cares more about revenge for my mom than being alive.”

  Shig dabs at his cigarette. “Don’t judge her like that. Regret is bad enough on its own. And when it stews for a long ass time?” He grinds the cigarette out into a tiny portable ashtray cup, then flicks it away into the street. “That kills people, Jun. It kills them inside.”

  I watch him as he heads to the driver seat. In the streetlight, he's a sickly pale. “So what about this job? Who’s doing Data Erasure if you’re with me?”

  He buckles his seatbelt. “Don’t worry. I got it covered. All you have to do is pull the trigger. I’ve even got the gun for you to do it with.”

  Those words don’t do anything to ease the stirring in my stomach. It’s not like IT people are forbidden from accessing the weapon room at PoleControl, but it is unusual. Very unusual. For Shig to go through the pains to pick the gun for me to use, must mean he really wants this guy dead.

  The car ride gets eerie real fast. No radio music. No conversation. Not even the obligatory awkward small talk. Shig’s got his eyes fixed on the road.

  “Are you alright?” I ask.

  His thick eyebrows pull in. “I’m fine.”

  We pass up the road that leads to Club Del Fox. But our destination isn’t too far off. A real swanky city. Lit sidewalks. Limos and sports cars cruising down the streets.

  Shig stops us at a behemoth of a hotel called The Bodhi Tree.

  From the outside, the it’s a classy-looking gig: round-lit fountain, clean marble lion statues, and granite enclosed palm trees. Richly-dressed young men and woman enter and leave in small herds.

  “Here. Code is 2626.” Shig says, handing me a PoleControl-issued anti-detection box. Similar to the one that my gun was in. This one is designed for a .44 magnum revolver. If there was ever a gun that embodied the name Showgun, it’s one of these. A “classic” Escort favorite. For them, the ungodly noise is a hoot and they barely feel any of the kickback with their Akuma genes. But for a Hound like me, it’s noisy nightmare. You wouldn’t use this to kill someone.

  My fingers itch in irritation. I stare at Shig. “You got me a .44?”

  He blinks at me. “What?”

  “Shig, are you trying to get us caught? Even if the noise didn’t bring everyone running and blow our ears out, I’d get the guy’s blood all over me.”

  Shig winces. “Sorry. I didn’t know. The room is soundproof if that helps.”

  I suppress a scoff. If it helps? How is that going to matter if I look and smell like bloody murder when I come out of the room? “Please tell me that you have another gun.”

  He’s silent.

  I put a hand to my temple. “You didn’t…”

  “Please, Jun. I don’t know my way around guns like an assassin.”

  “Alright. But you better make sure all the blood splatter gets on you.”

  “I will.” He drums his fingers on the wheel, then his gaze slides to the time. 5:59. “We’re going to room 4069.”

  I frown. “Both of us?” Raid aside, I’ve never had anyone come with me on a job before. “You’re not going to show me what he looks like?”

  “Believe me you don’t need it. You’ll know him when you see him.”

  6:00.

  Time for the chi-tower sweep. Along the streets, the white mini-copies of the tower whir to life. Each one pulses a ring of blue light.

  We wait out the sweep. Then I unbuckle my seatbelt first. “And you’re one hundred percent certain he won’t have any guests?”

  “He won’t.” Shig snorts. “No one wants to be around him. Come on.”

  I stare at the box in my hand. Better get this over quick.

  This target of ours has to be made of cold cash. White and black marbled tiles arrow across the lobby floors, polished so well that you could see your own reflection in tessellation. White marble pillars rising from ground like nobody’s business, all spotless and pristine as if the dust police just cleared the place. Every bellhop’s shoes and golden nametag look spit-shined.

  Ding!

  An elevator opens and a bellhop with a shiny dolley steps off. The elevator doors close with just the two of us in it. Shig punches in the four. He lets out a breath. He's holding himself like he's cold, staring at his shoes.

  Eying him, I ask, “What’s wrong with you?”

  He doesn't answer right away. "Don't worry about it. I’m fine.”

  “Shig, I’m having a hard time believing that.”

  “Can’t help you with that.”

  Annoyance hardens in my stomach. My gaze flicks to the top of the elevator doors. The floor reads two. "Why are you holding yourself like that then?"

  His fists curl. "I said don't worry about it."

  Three.

  "Shig, if something is wrong you can tell me."

  Four.

  His lip corners twitch, but he doesn't say a word.

  Gods, this is Mai 2.0! Is everyone determined to be difficult today?

  The elevator opens. He steps out first.

  I step out behind him.

  The fourth floor stands empty and as we get to room 4069, it's dead quiet. Shig wasn’t joking about it being soundproof.

  Much to my surprise, Shig pulls a card key from his pocket.

  I raise an eyebrow. A roommate?

  He holds the door open.

  The room is empty.

  I walk in, peering around for signs of another person. The bathroom is wide open. And empty.

  I don’t see a target. “Are we the only ones here?”

  Shig closes the door, then sits on the edge of the bed with his hands folded. “That’s right.”

  “Then who am I…?” My voice trickles down my throat. Cold sweeps my veins. “You?”

  “Yeah. So make it quick. Haven’t got all night,” Shig says.

  I just stare at him.

  And stare at him.

  And stare.

  This is a hallucination right?

  An acid trip? I took shrooms before I left? I put a hand to my head, trying to process it all. But I just…can’t. My mouth can’t even make words.

  Shig’s eyes narrow. “What are you waiting for?”

  “Shig… I can’t do this.”

  “Why?” He snorts. “You never had any problem killing someone before.”

  “Shig, this isn’t right.” I can barely believe the words coming out my own mouth. Me, talking about killing not being right. “Why do you want to die?”

  He drums his fingers on his thigh. “That’s my business, ain’t it?”

  “Shig, you can get help for this kind of thing,” I say.

  “Well, my help isn’t helping me,” he growls. "Do it!"

  "Why?"

  "You have to. If you don't, I might—”

  “Might…?�
�� I press.

  He crushes a hand to his chest, clenching as if it hurts. “You’ll regret it if you don’t,” He says quietly. “Please…just do it.”

  I gape back in disbelief. “Regret it if I don’t? And what? You’ll think I’ll feel like a million bucks if I do? I’m not going to hurt you.”

  He gives an odd hollow laugh. “Should’ve known. You’re too good, Jun. Too good for your own good.”

  An icy fluttering fills my chest at the words. Too good for my own good? “There’s a difference between killing someone for money and killing someone you know, Shig.”

  “So then, what?”

  “So, you take me back to Mai’s house, you fucker,” I hiss. “I’m not doing this shit.”

  “Not even if I wrote you a nice check?”

  “Shig, please, you’re starting to scare me.”

  He holds up his hands. “Fine. Fine. You win. We go back.”

  The elevator ride back down is more awkward that the one back up. Shig is suddenly more withdrawn. Not meeting my gaze. Not even looking my way. A hand against his mouth. Quivering. Like a deadline is coming. Or maybe one that’s past due.

  Every second, the palpitations in my chest get thicker. I hold the magnum box tight. So tight I can feel the edges bite me. I’m suddenly reminded of the day I buried my gun at Ise. That hard sharp bite that ate into my skin then.

  In the car, Shig seems to settle down a little. He seems no different than when we arrived.

  I huddle against my door, pretending to be tired so he doesn’t try to talk. I don’t think I could sleep in this car if I tried.

  We get to the forested roads before the car starts rolling to a stop.

  My heart pounds in my chest. “Why are we stopping?”

  Shig leans against the steering, his breaths getting heavy. Sweat is beading down his forehead. “Gimme a minute.”

  I tense. “Shig. Are you sure you’re not sick?”

  “I’m fucking fine. Will you stop…” He’s panting. “Stop nagging. I just need to…” He’s clenching at his chest again.“Need to check something,” Shig says, unbuckling his seatbelt. He gets out goes around back.

  I open my own door, and unbuckle my seatbelt for fresh air.

  Shig is back there for a long while. Long enough to make me turn in my seat. He’s propped against the open trunk.

  Fucking knew it. Why didn’t he just say he was sick? I get out and walk around to the other side.

  Shig slumps to the floor, hunching. He holds up a hand to stop me. "Don't. Stay away.”

  I thrust out my hand. "Shig, give me your keys. I'll—”

  Dark tendrils leak out from where his finger bunch up his shirt at the chest. Almost like…

  The mech that attacked Vampire flashes through my mind.

  Oh no!

  Shig arches in pain. There’s something dark in his lap. A gun. My gun.

  My blood goes cold. How on earth did he get that? “Shig?”

  He points it at me.

  “Shig—”

  BANG!

  5-10 'Ah'

  “Fuck, bish." A voice trickles into my ears like water. "There's no more?"

  Vampire?

  "Err…I used it all?" Pan's voice floods in. "Sorry. I thought you said I could smoke—”

  "Not the damn weed, bish! The meds! That shit ain't cheap!"

  “Oh uhh… She was bleeding a lot. I didn’t know how much to use.”

  A throbbing ache pounds in my right shoulder. I open my eyes. I’m in a bed I don’t recognize. The decor of this place reminds me heavily of Club Del Fox. Maple-leafed curtains, white sheets and pillows. A look through the window confirms my suspicions. This is Club Del Fox.

  What day is it? And what time is it? With a heavy heart, I realize that these kinds of questions are starting to get way too common. And so is getting injured. The last thing that I remember is Shig—

  I jolt upright, causing my shoulder to ache even more. If Shig did something to me… But as I check my body, Shig’s tobacco-clogged scent isn’t on me anywhere. It’s not in the room at all. I look around. He didn’t finish me off? Not that I was looking forward to the afterlife or anything, but that would’ve made a lot more sense. Though technically speaking, nothing made sense that whole fucking day.

  He was under control. That’s why he insisted on being shot, and why Shig had been acting so weird. But still, shoot him? No wonder the dragons weren’t willing to negotiate anymore. Why settle when you can do something that underhanded?

  The door opens. Vampire enters in a yellow tee, black pants and with her hair tied back in a ponytail with Pan in tow. “Bish, next time ask before you…” Vampire’s attention falls on me. “Ooooh. Heyo! You’re finally awake.”

  “How long have I been here?” I croak.

  “Since last night,” Pan says.

  “Where did you find me?”

  “Out by the road,” Vampire says, coming in and plopping into the chair next to me.

  Pan shuts the door and leans against it. “You’re lucky we both found you out there in the dark. Nobody from the reserve usually comes walking out that far.”

  I sit up, wincing. “What were you guys doing out that far anyway?”

  Pan’s lips curve into a grin. She glances at Vampire. “Well…”

  Face reddening, Vampire throws her hands up. “Nuh-uh. I’ll be askin’ the questions around here. What were you doing outside, bish? ‘Splain that.”

  “My friend tried to make me kill him, then he shot me.”

  Pan raises an eyebrow. “Your friend?”

  Vampire scratches her head. “Make you kill him?

  “No offense.” Pan comes over to sit at the edge of the bed. “But you might need to get some new friends.”

  “Might?” Vampire rolls her eyes. “Wasn’t sure about him the first time I got shot, lemme get shot a few mo’. Then I’ll be damn sure.” She shakes her head. “Best friends forever, bish.”

  I scowl. “It wasn’t like that. He wasn’t himself.”

  Pan points a finger at me. “That’s how it all starts. ‘Oh it wasn’t that bad. He didn’t mean it.’ Next thing you know, boom, hospital again.”

  I give up. Not that it matters right now. I’m just glad that I ended up here. Alive.

  “Bish do me a solid.” Vampire rubs her temples with both hands. “For like two seconds…” She pinches her index finger and thumb together. “Can you just like sit still and not do anything? Because I’m starting to notice this funny trend. Every time you leave our sight, you almost die and it’s scarin’ me. I don't have enough weed to keep up with the stress now.” She says the last statement with a pointed look at Pan who only grins back.

  “Well, you'll get your wish. I'm not going anywhere right now," I say.

  "Damn straight." Vampire sniffs. "By the way, I figured out where Heaven moved that woman."

  My gaze snaps back to her. Amaterasu! "You did? Where?"

  "Familiar with the Ise Technical Institute?" Pan asks.

  "No. Where is that?"

  “Bout a two-hour drive north of here, I think,” Pan says.

  “I need to get there,” I say.

  “Nuh-uh. You need to rest.” She smacks the back of her hand against her other one. “So R-E-S-T your ass down, bish.”

  “Besides…” Pan adds. “You walk in there and you’ll set off every security alarm in the damn building. And PoleControl updated that shit recently too.”

  My shoulders slump. “Then how do I get in?”

  Vampire rubs her temples again. “There’s three tiers of security on that place. There’s Level-3 Chi detectors that I can disable. That just takes time.”

  “How much time? I need to get there asap.”

  “Let’s just say Pan and I won’t be sleeping tonight,” She says dryly. “Then there’s the Level-2 Yin-Yang iCoreMagnets that was in the maze. Can’t really help you with that since you have to do that from the inside. Then there’s Level-1 security which are mechs. A
nd…” She lifts her hand. “You know what they do. Which is why you should—”

  “Okay, okay. I get it already.” I ease back down on the pillows. “I’ll rest.”

  Vampire and Pan high five each other.

  My phone buzzes under my cheek, waking me. I slip my hand under the pillow and check who it is. Tamotsu. I squint at the screen. What would he want this late? “Hello?”

  At first there’s no answer, but just as I start for the hang up button, I get a raspy, “Hey.”

  My insides tighten a little. It’s Mai. “We match now.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “You’ve got bullets in your shoulder. I’ve got one in mine.” I brace myself for the impeding yelling, the scolds, the hysterics.

  They don’t come. There’s only a resigned sigh on the other line. “I already know.”

  The tension in me melts. “Vampire called you?”

  “No. No one told me. I just couldn’t shake the feeling that something happened to you. I was hoping that it wasn’t true.”

  Must be because we’re lives. “The dragons possessed Shig somehow. He was trying to get me to shoot him. But when I didn’t, he shot me instead.”

  “They’ve been working on magic like that since they started looking for you,” Mai says. “It’s very similar to ours.”

  “Then I can use wayfinding on other people?”

  “Not to the same effect. Gods can’t use wayfinding to hurt or manipulate others. We can only use it to heal and release others from their bonds. You might be able to use it to free someone they possessed. Of course, you’ve got to be in the position to do so first.”

  I wish I’d known that. “That could’ve saved us yesterday.”

  “I’m sorry. I should’ve told you that upfront instead of yelling at you.” She’s starting to sound like Mai again. “It’s just so hard to let go, Jun. There’s always a chance to make things right if you’re alive.”

  I stare at the wall, water building in my eyes. When has anything gone right for me? Every day, the dragons split my family apart. “But nothing has been right since I’ve been alive, Mai. I keep losing everything. Just once—” A sob escapes me. “I want to keep something. I don’t want to lose anyone else.”