by A. Gorman
I just need to take baby steps.
I consider going to the store and watching Shelby buy items for fundraisers a step in the right direction, which is what I agreed to do with her this week. But spending my first night out talking with Stacy about the actual fundraiser itself is too much. So instead, I’m sitting here being a creeper and staring at my sexy ass man sitting beside me.
I see good looking men daily. Hell, half of the new teachers coming into the school the last few years are fresh out of college and easy on the eyes, but I never take it past admiring them from afar. It doesn’t mean a few haven’t tried to ask me out. I’ve just never felt any sparks.
Who knows if I ever will with another man?
If I go through life having had only one great love, I’m okay with that. Because some people go all their lives without ever experiencing love. The “move heaven and earth to be with you” type of love, which I had with Brock, no matter how short-lived it may have been. The memories we made together will last me a lifetime.
At least Mr. Eye Candy beside me is a good enough distraction to help me keep my mind from becoming overwhelmed with memories of fundraisers and funerals.
I watch as he attempts to get one of the waiter’s attention to order. I bite back a laugh as he grabs a pretzel and tosses it into his mouth, crunching down on it and continues to lean up onto the bar holding his hand out towards anyone behind the bar who’ll look his way in an attempt to catch their attention.
Poor guy. He has no clue that they’re so enthralled in the hustle and bustle of everyone shouting orders out at them that they don’t even notice people who stand by silently waiting to be approached.
He opens his mouth to attempt to shout, “Excuse me,” at Cohen, but he whizzes right by him and down to Shelby, who I didn’t even notice was shouting for another drink. I see the brooding look in his eyes as he watches Cohen refill Shelby’s drink. He mumbles under his breath, “You’ve got to be fucking kidding me.”
Now I know I’ve let the poor guy suffer long enough. I’m about to shout to Cohen to take the poor guys order. That’s when I feel the vibration of his phone through the wooden bar. My eyes immediately shift from watching him to his phone screen.
I notice a girl’s name, Kora, appear as the person texting him and feel a pang of disappointment, though I’m not exactly sure why.
The guy’s insanely hot so of course he has a girlfriend. Someone who looks like that sure as hell shouldn’t be single. It’s not like I’d ever be brave enough to approach a guy like him.
I’ll stick to admiring from afar; it seems to be what I do best anyways.
Picking up his phone, I think he’s about to respond but he does the opposite instead. He powers the phone off and pockets it. That’s when I see it. A tattoo on the inside of his left forearm. It looks like a skeleton grim reaper holding a pair of dog tags in his hands with the name Granger King along with a date ‘9-16-2010’
That’s only thirteen days away from today.
I wonder if he’s military.
Judging from the different tattoos covering his arms that seem to have a military theme, I guess it’s safe to assume so. Suddenly, without making a conscious decision, I yell out to Cohen again. I don’t tell him that the poor guy beside me is failing miserably at getting a drink, I order him one instead. If he’s military, it’s the least I can do to repay him for his service to our country.
“What can I get ya, darlin’?” he drawls, leaning onto the bar and flashing me another flirtatious smile.
I can’t believe I’m doing this. I’m never this bold. Ever.
Letting out a nervous laugh, I reach out and pat my bar stool neighbor on the shoulder, keeping my hand on his shoulder a beat too long. I can’t seem to care because the electricity that warms my hand from that simple touch sends a wave of adrenalin through me, giving me courage for the first time since Brock passed to actually flirt with a man.
“Can you get this guy here a beer, on me…?”
Cohen’s eyes widen as they follow where my hand is resting. I notice a flicker of jealousy in them before he blinks it away.
I jump slightly as the man I’m so casually resting my hand on snaps his head so quickly in my direction, it startles me.
The second our eyes meet all the air is knocked from my lungs.
Holy. Crap.
I’ve been emotionally knocked flat onto my ass.
My entire body freezes under his whiskey-colored stare. I slowly remove my hand from where it rests and place it on the bar in front of me. I attempt to hide the fact that they’re both shaking slightly.
His eyes are dark and guarded, his face hidden behind a perfectly trimmed beard. He’s wearing a ballcap which is pulled down low, but not so much that it’s possible for him successfully shield his handsome face from me.
I’m pulled from my momentarily paralysis when I feel Cohen affectionately rub his thumb down the side of my cheek, before turning his attention toward the bearded stranger.
What the hell was that?
“What kinda beer can I get ya?” he asks, not skipping a beat while I sit here, reeling for his show of possessiveness.
Eye Candy’s voice when it comes out is smooth as molasses with a rich, raspy tone. It’s so sexy, it makes me weak in the knees. “Whatever’s on tap. And can I get an order of fries and a medium-rare burger with lettuce and bacon?”
“Sure. I’ll go put that order in as soon as I bring you your beer.” Cohen disappears down to the other end of the bar to continue taking orders, ignoring the stank eyes I’m throwing his way. I let out a flustered sigh and drop my eyes to my glass of water.
I have no idea what the heck I’m doing. It’s all so damn overwhelming and intimidating. I’m probably making a fool of myself….
His voice pulls me from my thoughts swirling like a freaking tornado in my mind.
“You didn’t have to do that, but thank you. I guess it’s easy to spot out of towners in this place, huh?” He unexpectedly lets out a nervous chuckle, and I feel my shoulders relax a bit.
Shifting on my barstool, I look up at him, laughter tingeing my voice, and tell him how to get the bartender’s attention the next time he comes in here. “Duly noted,” he replies, holding his beer up between us. He stares down at me as his lips slowly curl up at the corners, showing off the sexiest smile, and I feel like a jar of fireflies has been released into my belly. “Well, the next round of drinks is on me.”
I explain that won’t be necessary, since I’m the designated driver, but I inform him of Shelby’s drink of the night.
His nod as his eyes linger on mine is knowing, sending my heart racing. Nervously, I lift my glass towards my mouth, and take a long sip from the tiny straw to try and wet my now parched mouth.
This man flusters me with the simplest little glance. I need to pull myself together. It’s like I’m a teenager all over again and the star quarterback is flirting with me before the big game.
Clearing his throat, he turns his attention back to the game and I take that as my cue to leave him alone.
Men are so confusing.
At least I can say I tried to flirt.
Baby steps. I think I can successfully call buying a stranger a drink at a bar as baby steps.
The next hour goes by with Shelby and I eating our pizzas, her enjoying one more drink on bearded mystery man, followed by her dragging me out onto the dance floor to do one line dance before calling it a night.
As we get ready to leave, I use the excuse of saying goodnight to Cohen to go back up to the bar, because Eye Candy still sitting there. Arms folded on the bar, beer in hand, and eyes on the game. The same way he’s been for the last hour and a half since entering the bar tonight.
I shimmy my body between him and the new person occupying my old seat, and yell to Cohen who’s busy mixing a drink a few feet away, “ ‘Night, Cohen!” I wave goodbye and hear Shelby a few inches behind me yelling him goodnight as well.
Turning to maneu
ver back out from between the bar stools, I lock eyes with mystery man one more time, and give him a shy smile. “I hope you have a good night too….” I find myself silently hoping he’ll give me his name. Anything to hold onto. I need to tell Ilene about this experience during my next session. I need a name at least to make the conversation a little less awkward. I can’t just call him mystery man with a great beard.
“Taylor.” His voice rumbles straight into my chest, making my heart skip a beat.
I let out a shaky breath and try to will my voice to work. “Well, Taylor, it was nice meeting you tonight. By the way, I’m Emberlyn.” I cram my arm up between us not having much space to work with and awkwardly shake hands with him before shimmying the rest of the way out.
His eyes follow me as he spins slightly on his bar stool. “It was nice meeting you too, Emberlyn.”
I don’t know why but I love the way my name sounds coming off his tongue. I can’t help but wonder what that tongue would feel like as it got tangled up with mine.
The thought instantly brings a red blush to my cheeks.
That one glass of wine has turned me into an idiot.
This is why I don’t drink.
I blurt out, “Hope to see you around.”
Shelby grabs my hand and drags me towards the front of the bar, and laughs her ass off.
The second we step out into the cool night air, the night sky fills with our laughter.
“Oh. My. God. Did I just witness you actually flirting with a man? Hold up!” she yells at me as she raises her hands into the air. “Not just any fucking man, but probably the hottest man to ever step foot into Lucky’s!”
Hearing her say the words out loud makes me laugh harder, until it tappers off into a cry. Wiping away the tears from my face, I crack a smile. “I flirted with a guy tonight. A really hot guy.” I laugh and cry all at the same time, feeling like I may have possibly lost my mind.
Hooking arms we walk to my car together and continue to giggle with one another over the fact that after a year and a half, I finally flirted with a man other than Brock.
***
The End for now! You can read the rest of Rising From The Ashes in my full length novel out early 2017!
About the Author
Danielle Jamie
New York Times & USA Today Bestselling author who took a chance and wrote her first book in 2013. It was the beginning to a whirlwind journey into the world of a published author with now 22 books available on ebook retailers sites!
Danielle Jamie is a contemporary romance author who loves getting lost in a good book or writing a memorable love story. Her most popular works are her Bestselling Savannah Series, her heart wrenching standalone Tempt my Heart and her steamy taboo Stepbrother Series!
She lives in Upstate NY with her husband, two daughters and son. She loves traveling and seeing the world all the while meeting her fans along the way at Author Events.
https://www.amazon.com/Danielle-Jamie/e/B00BRQII0K
Chapter One
July 27, 2005
Chesterfield, Missouri
Talon
“Promise me you’ll wait for me, I can’t stand the thought of you moving on while I’m gone.” I say as she wipes her tears. I know this is selfish of me, but I love her too much for her to be with another man.
Ever.
She’s always been mine.
My saving grace.
My angel on Earth.
“I will always wait for you, you know that. You and me, forever.” She kisses me tenderly. I feel everything she’s promised me in this kiss.
“Come on, we better get home. The storms will be rolling in soon.” Grabbing her hand, I pull her to the car with me. We make it in just as the rain starts to fall. Leaving her tomorrow will be the hardest thing I’ll ever have to do, but I knew that if I had a chance in this life it would be joining the Army.
I never knew my birth parents. I grew up in foster home after foster home. When I was fifteen, Tina and Ben took me in, and they’ve been a blessing from above. They adopted me and gave me the life that I’d always wanted. Now that I’m twenty-two, I’ve been working at Ben’s car dealership to support myself, as well as Amelia. I signed up for some college classes, but it’s not for me. I knew if I was ever going to be able to provide for Amelia and myself, I needed to join the military.
“Talon, maybe we should wait before heading home. The rain is coming down hard now. I wouldn’t mind just sitting here making out for a few hours.” She winks. “Besides, we won’t be able to do this again for months.”
“It’ll be fine, babe. This isn’t even the worst of it, I heard that we were going to get five to six inches of rain by midnight.” I say as I lean over and kiss her wet face. “God I love you so much, sweetheart. I can’t believe that after the last six years together, I have to leave you for God knows how long.”
“Stop.” She places her hand to my mouth. “You know that I’ll be here waiting for you. I’ve loved you since we met, and this is something we both agreed on. I’m going to finish college while you serve our country, then we can have our future together. We can buy that house in Apple Valley and have a few kids. When we’re ready, of course. Trust me, this is going to be a hard adjustment for the both of us, and moving out of our apartment and back in with my parents is going to be weird, but I think this is going to be the best descion we’ve made. My dad was in the Army, and he says that you’re doing the right thing.”
I intertwine my fingers with hers. “I know baby, it’s just that... Leaving you is going to be the hardest. I never knew love until I met you. I’ve never had a real family, and the love I feel when I’m with you and your family, makes me happy. You complete me. I know that’s cheesy, but it’s the truth, Amelia.”
“Don’t you get all sappy on me, Livingston, we will be just fine. Come on, let’s get going since it’s slacked up a bit. I need to spend the rest of the night in bed with you.” She winks as she takes a hair tie from her wrist and pulls her golden hair upon her head.
I met Amelia six years ago. She and my sister, Winter, are best friends. I knew the moment I laid my eyes on her that I wanted to be with her. Her blonde hair and brown eyes were all I thought about for weeks. It took me almost a year to ask her out. We would hang out and it was on the tip of my tongue so many times, but I would lose my nerve. Then one day we kind of asked each other, and we’ve been inseparable since. Her family is amazing and they have been so good to the both of us. Without their help and guidance, as well as Tina and Ben’s, I am not sure where I’d be right now.
“Making love to you all night, sounds like a great plan to me,” I say as I pull forward onto the highway. We went to dinner with some friends tonight, then we decided to shoot some pool at the bar next door to the diner before heading home. Looking down at her hand on my leg, I squeeze her hand tight. Looking at her, “I love you so much, you know that me being gone won’t change that?” I watch as her face goes pale she opens her mouth to speak...
“Talon, watch out!” Her screams fill my ears as I see the headlights coming toward us. I swerve, trying to avoid the other vehicle, but the roads are slick from the rain. All I hear are Amelia’s screams and the glass shattering all around us.
This isn’t how the night was supposed to go. I was planning on proposing to her when we got home. I’d rushed home earlier and placed the ring on the bed, wanting to surprise her when we were settled in for the night.
“Don’t leave me, Amelia. I need you, sweetheart,” I beg to her. “You’re my first everything and I can’t live in this world without you, baby.” My screams fill the car, as I hear sirens and the rain falling harder. Her breath hitches as she gurgles my name.
Chapter Two
April 18, 2010
El Paso, Texas
The night I lost Amelia, I lost that part if myself she’d helped me find. She made me stronger when I was weak, she made me feel loved when I wasn’t loved, she was my light in the dark when I couldn’t se
e. The only person I ever truly loved. I didn’t even attend her funeral. I left the crash with a few scratches...fucking scratches and her? She died in my arms, I can still hear and see her, gurgling my name. That image will forever be impacted in my memory. The semi was traveling at a high rate of speed and, although I swerved, the truck still plowed right into Amelia’s side of the car. My train was leaving St. Louis, heading toward Texas for basic training. Mere hours after I was released from St. Josephs, and I had no choice but to leave. My life was starting and ending all in the same day. I signed myself out of the hospital and couldn’t even bring myself to return to our apartment to get my clothes.
Suicide... The thought played over and over in my mind. I had nothing left when I lost my girl, but something inside of me couldn’t do it. Several times I had pills in one hand, and my gun in another. I could feel the sweat trickle down my forehead and drip to my shoulder. The demon inside of me was saying pull the trigger, but the man that’s in my heart was saying never give up.
You have a life to live, no matter how fucked up it is.
Arriving here, in Texas, I was hurt, lost, and pissed. I should have died that night, not Amelia. I keep replaying it over and over in my head. Had I just stayed there and made love to her in the truck like she’s wanted, had we not went to dinner with friends and stayed home, then she would be back in Missouri waiting for me. All the whys and what ifs always haunt me. Looking at the calendar, I notice the date. In a few months, it will mark five-years that she’s been gone. Worst. Fucking. Day. Of. My. Life.
“Amelia, why did you leave?” I say aloud.
“Livingston, you okay? Who are you talking to?” Swindle asks walking into the room, sitting on the edge of the desk. She never addresses me as Corporal, since we’re both the same rank and have gotten pretty close. She has become one of my best friends. Her sass and heart of gold make her one of the realest females I’ve ever encountered. “You look lost.” she says, as she combs her hair back with her small fingers. Swindle reaches over, running her hand down my arm. “Talon.” My name rolls off of her tongue.