by A. Gorman
“I’m going to say this once, and once only, so you better listen and listen closely You...” she points to me, “are the bravest, child, man, solider that I’ve ever met. You have been through things in your life that I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy. You’ve not only been a co-worker the last five years, you’ve been my best friend. I have cried on your shoulder more times than I have anyone else’s. I’ve admired the man you are, and I will stand next to you through all of this. I want to be there for you at your lowest, and smiling with you through your highest. You’re not going to push me out of your life, Talon, I’m in it for the long haul.”
I watch as her body trembles and her tears fall. God, she is so beautiful. I clear my throat. “How do you know it’s going to be okay? Have you ever lived with a missing limb?” My jaw ticks as I see her eyes bulge. “You know what,” I ask and she sits on the edge of the bed. She places her hand on mine. “I prayed to God that he would just take me, let me die. When my body laid over yours, I prayed that you’d be safe, and that me... That I would die. Have you ever loved someone so much that you would lay down and die for them? That’s how much I love you, but like this...I am no good for you. I’m no kind of man like this. I am vulnerable, and I damn sure can’t give you what you need.”
“Talon,” she cries. “I love you just the way you are. I have been so sick since the accident and I’m so grateful that you saved my life. The truth is, I am nothing without you. Had you died, I don’t know that I could go on.” She thinks she couldn’t have, but I am living fucking proof that you can survive. No matter how much I try pushing her away she is fighting harder for me.
“Trust me, you could’ve. It damn sure wouldn’t have been easy. I know there is no way in hell that I could live without you. I knew that if they killed you, they would be killing me too. When Amelia died...” I watch as she scoots closer to me, her head lying on my chest. “I was so fucking lost. Every day I wanted to die. I’d wake up and wonder why the hell I was still alive. Me, the man with no family, the man who had nothing, was able to live each day, breathe fresh air, listen to music, and save lives, when someone as sweet and loved as she was, had to die. Then I met you, and you were the shinning light that I needed to see. You, you saved me.”
I feel her whimpering. “Please don’t ever think you are not worthy. You truly are the best man I know. I promise we will get through this. You and me.”
“You talk to my parents,” I ask, I know she did since they’re shipping me to back to Missouri.
“Yes, they are so worried, but I assured them that you were going to be fine. Ben was going to put Tina on the first flight here, but he didn’t want her to come alone.”
“I miss them. After I left, I just couldn’t go back. Every time I was able to, I lost my nerve and just started shutting them out. All of them, and I know I was wrong. Hell, if it wasn’t for them, I would have never joined the Army.”
“Want to call them? Let them hear your voice, so they know you’re okay,” she asks, sitting up, reaching for the phone. “Lesion, got this from somewhere, does he know your sister?”
“Sure, we can call,” I say as I sit up straighter. I feel my leg burning—it’s been unbearably burning. I feel myself reaching to rub it, then I stop. “Wait, how would he know her,” I ask confused.
“Your guess is as good as mine. He had her number programmed in the phone for me, and she asked how he was taking this.” Dax and Winter. No fucking way.
“That’s just weird. I knew that he grew up in Missouri, never thought to ask what part.” I scratch the scruff on my face, it’s long and itchy. “When can I leave?”
“In a few days. They said that I could fly with you. I had to threaten them, but it worked.” She winks. “I promise you we will get through this. I told them that you’d prefer your therapy there, verses here.”
“You’ve taken care of everything, haven’t you,” I ask, as I know that she has. “Do they know about us?”
“I have. I told you, I’m in this for the long run. Nope, they have their suspicions, of course, but I was able to handle everything due to the fact that you had Winter listed as your emergency contact and she gave me permission.”
“Smart woman you are. You and her have become quite close.” I know that my sister and Amelia were the best of friends, and she was just as crushed as I was when she died. But instead of being a protector for my sister, I fled, and never checked on her.
“I’m sure that’s one of the reasons you love me.” She kisses my lips.
“Just one,” I retort.
“I’m going to grab some coffee, you want anything?”
“Nah, I’m good. I need to make a long over due phone call.”
“Good idea, I’ll be back.”
I nod and watch her fine ass stroll through the door. Picking the phone up. I dial the number that I have embedded in my brain, it was the first phone number I ever had. After a few rings, I hear the sweet hello of the only mother I ever knew.
“Mom.” Is all I say.
“Oh my God, Talon. Are you okay? We’ve been worried sick. Your friend was gracious enough to keep us updated.”
“I’ll be fine. It’ll be hard, but I will eventually be the old me again. The person you made me to be.” I wipe a lone tear from my cheekbone. She must sense it.
“Baby, I love you as if I birthed you myself. I know you were older when we adopted you, but you are our son. Ben and I prayed for a son like you, we didn’t care how old you were. We’ve missed you so much. When will you be here? We have the garage apartment all set up for you. Your sister has been working to get it together since she found out about the accident.”
“Thank you, I needed that. I know you do. I was a selfish bastard for leaving the way I did. I was so mad at myself. I blamed myself, for years. You know how much Amelia meant to me. I was just...lost. I felt like I was ten years old again, and all alone.”
“You were never alone. We’ve been right here waiting for you. For our son to come back to us.”
“I’m back.” I sigh. “Where’s Dad?”
“He’s at work. He will be so happy to see you.”
“That man works harder than anyone I know.” And it’s true, he really does.
“You know him, he loves the money. He likes the finer things in life.” She gaspss. “Oh my goodness, wait till you see his new toys. He has some fancy new boat, he will be glad to take you fishing on”
“That sounds good, I have missed our fishing trips.” He and I used to go every weekend.
“Talon, I am so glad you called. I can’t stop smiling.”
“Happy I can make your day, mom. I’m a little tired, so I’m going to let you go. I’ll see you soon, though. Give Dad and Winter my love, please.”
“Get some rest, baby. I love you so much, please never forget that.”
“I love you too,” I say before ending the call. Sliding the phone on the table next to me, I move back the blanket that covers my legs...leg. Looking at the bandage, on my left leg makes me ill. Feeling nauseated, I reach for the small trash can next to me. I feel the tears that I’ve been trying to hold in well in my eyes and cover my face. I’ll never be able to serve my country again. My career is over.
Chapter Seven
September 31, 2010
Chesterfield, Missouri
“Stop fidgeting, you look fine.” I tell Reese as she wiggles in front of me.
“No, I am meeting your grandparents for the first time. I want to look my best. Are you sure this outfit will be okay? Or should I wear something longer?”
“Babe, you look fine. I like that purple on you.” She’s in a light purple romper, as you ladies call them. I love seeing her in regular clothes.
“I just feel like I look huge. I haven’t been working out and you sure can tell.”
“Are you pregnant?” The words leave my mouth without thinking. Her eyes grow wide.
“No, not that I know of. Hell, I never thought of that. I really think it
’s all your moms cooking, and the lunch dates with your sister.”
“Well, I can’t tell that anything has changed, you look as beautiful as ever to me.” I lie, I can see she has put on a few pounds, but I am not that stupid to tell her she has gained some weight. “Look at me, I look like I ate a whole side of a cow.” I’ve been doing therapy and learning to walk with my prosthetic, and it’s been a fucking struggle. I never thought that it would be this hard, but it has pissed me off so many times. I won’t lie, I have pulled it off and thrown it more than once.
“You look fine, I like the little pudgy you got going on.” She giggles. I grab her around her waist and pull her onto my lap. “Stop, you’ll mess up my hair,” she cries.
“Kiss me, beautiful,” I say, as she leans her face into mine. “God, I love you.” I say as I slide my tongue in between her luscious lips.
“Not as much as I love you, soldier.” Her arms wrap around my neck. “Shit, you’re going to mess up my outfit. It wrinkles easily.”
“Fine, get your sexy ass off my lap. Tonight, when everyone leaves, you’re mine.”
“I think I can arrange that. Are you wearing that?”
Looking at my ensemble I shake my head and say, “Yes. Is it okay?”
“Yeah, I think you look hot no matter what you wear. I am really partial to those red basketball shorts, but the jeans you have on will do.”
“I think I’m going to try my prosthetic again. I want to be able to walk, not be in this chair.”
“Good, I want you to walk and be out of that chair. I know you can do it. I think that your therapy is going really well.”
“As long as I have you by my side, I believe that I can do anything.” I know that sounds cheesy, but it’s the truth.
“I’ll never leave your side. Come on, we better get going. I am starved, and your mom promised me green beans.”
“Will you help me with my leg?” I see a smile spread across her face. “I’ll need the walker too.” She rushes to the closet to get what I asked for. This place is pretty big. My parents used to rent it out, then they used it for storage. It is attached to the garage and has two bedrooms, a living room, a kitchen, and one bath. There’s even a laundry room. We’ve talked about moving out of here eventually, but I know my parents love having us here. My sister just lives about ten minutes away, so she visits daily. She is a real estate agent and has done pretty well for herself. I haven’t seen any of Amelia’s family since arriving back. Mom has all of my stuff I left at the apartment that was supposed to go in storage. She said that she gave Amelia’s things to her family.
“Hey, soldier, you ready to show these people you can walk with your new leg?” She winks as she scoots the walker closer to me.
“Hell yeah.” I grab the walker and make it a few steps. It feels weird at first, but I can get used to it.
* * *
“Son, it’s so good to have you here,” my father says as he pulls a chair up next to me. I love this back yard and the gatherings they have in the summer. He hands me a beer. “So...I’ve been holding off on this conversation, but why in the world would you distance yourself from us? We have loved you since you came into our lives, and you pushed us away when you needed us the most.”
“Sir, I didn’t know what to do. Honestly, I was ready to just end my life. The love that Amelia and I shared, I never thought I could find that again. She was my world. Other than you, Mom, and Winter...She was all I had. Then she was gone, just like that. Hell, it was suppose to be the night I proposed to her. After I signed myself out of the hospital, I wanted to call you, but I just couldn’t. I needed to get on with my life, away from here, away from everything that reminded me of her.”
“I get that. I really do. You know your mother wasn’t my first love. Annie, was her name. She was my light in the dark. We had it all. We had just got married and she was expecting our first child. About ten weeks into her pregnancy, she lost the baby. She was so devastated and distraught, she killed herself with grief. I’d kept pleading to her that we could try again, that we would get through it together, but she wouldn’t listen. I came home from work one day and there she was in the middle of the kitchen floor, both wrist slit, blood everywhere.” He chokes back his tears.
“She was my life, son. We’d dated all through high school and I never thought I’d love anyone as much as I did her. Then I met your mother. We struggled with fertility, and I was so scared that she too would turn out the way Annie did. But we fought our issues together. We won the battle when we had Winter, then years later we struggled again and you came into our life. The son we’d dreamt of for years. I know that you have had a fucked up life, and I hate like hell that we didn’t get you sooner, but I also know that you are a hell of a man. You tried shutting us out, but we had a connection in the Army. Dax Lesion,” he says and I give him a confused look.
“You see, he and your sister have been friends for years. He’d already moved away to Kansas City, by the time you came into the picture. But once she knew he was there with you, she didn’t want you to know. I know, it was shitty of all of us not to tell you, but you really gave us no choice, son.”
“Well, now that all makes sense. I’m not pissed, I was just confused on how he and her knew each other, and how he was calling to tell her about the accident.”
“Now about Reese, she seems like a good woman.” He smirks.
“She is great, I pushed her away at first, but I fell hard for her. I knew there was no going back.”
“You can see how much she loves you just by the mention of your name. Never let her go. She is your second chance at love. If you love her the way I love your mom, y’all will be just fine.”
“Thanks. I know it’s been hard on her, with me losing my leg, and us both leaving the Army. She is looking into getting her real estate license. Winter said she would be more than happy to help her get started.”
“Sounds like she and your sister have become quite close. She is a talker, she’d do great in that field.”
“That she will. She’s for sure a people person.” I laugh as I see her walking toward us with a beer in her hand. “Hey, baby.” I grab her hand. “You having a good time?”
“I am, your grandmother is a damn hoot!” She giggles.
“That’s my momma. She will have you laughing all night,” Dad chimes in.
“I had to walk away, my stomach was aching from laughing so hard.” Reese says smiling.
“Well, I better get back over there. I left your mom at the grill, that’s never a good thing.” Dad grabs my shoulder. “I mean what I said. Embrace it.”
I nod in agreement. I watch as Reese sits in the chair my father was in. I take her in, her dark hair blowing with the wind. Her smile is contagious. Grabbing her hand, she intertwines her fingers in mine. “Marry me,” I say. She looks up at me. “I love you and it only makes sense for us to get married.”
“You’re serious, soldier?”
“Hell, yes. I wouldn’t ask if I wasn’t. I could plan this big romantic thing, but you and I both know that’s not us.”
“Talon, I would be honored to be your wife, and you’re right, I’m not into the fancy proposal. Been there done that.” She laughs. “You will need to buy me ring, though.” She winks.
“God, I can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with you.”
“You’re stuck with me now. Your grandma likes me, so that means I am family. Her words, not mine.” She tilts the beer bottle to her lips.
“I didn’t want to tell you, but it’s hard to get her approval. She is a tough cookie to impress.”
“I got that. She was thrilled that I knew how to shoot a gun, and that I’ve been in the Army. You didn’t tell me your grandfather was a SEAL.”
“Jesus, don’t let her near a gun. She can be dangerous.” I snort. “Yeah, he was. He served five tours, then was injured and retired.”
“He’s quite.” She rests her head on my shoulder. “I like him though. I have fallen
in love with your family. Now I am scared for you to meet mine, they’re so different.
“Speaking of, is your mom still coming to visit next week?” She’d said her mom wanted to come and stay a week or so.
“Yeah, she is. She’s pretty excited about meeting you. I told her that she was more than welcome to stay here, but she has already reserved a room at the Hyatt.”
“It’ll be good for you to see her. I know that you miss your family.”
“I do miss her. But I have to warn you, you think I talk a lot? She is ten times worse.”
I laugh. “You’re not so bad, babe. I enjoy our conversations.”
“Let’s go tell them the news. Dax just got here. Your sister has been a nervous wreck since she found out he was coming.”
Chapter Eight
October 31, 2010
Chesterfield, MO
My sister is having a Halloween party tonight. Reese insisted that we go as Raggedy Ann and Andy. She found the costumes online. I’m not thrilled about wearing a yarn wig and wearing make-up, but I’d do anything for that woman. I watch as she sleeps, she is fucking perfect. Sliding my hand up her thigh, I make my way to her breast. I tweak her nipple and watch as she turns over giving me better access. My dick is so hard just thinking about being inside of her. She got on the pill last month, so now I don’t have to worry about condoms. Thank fuck, cause I hated having that barrier between us. I love taking her raw. My dick jumps, as I run my fingers over her bare pussy. Her moans let me know she wants me. Bringing my face to hers, I kiss the corner of her mouth. Trailing down her neck, making my way to her breast, and pulling a taut nipple between my teeth.
“Talon,” she moans. “Make love to me.”
“I plan on that, sweetheart,” I say as I wrap my arm under her back. Pushing her hair away from her face, I see that her skin is now flushed with desire. Sliding a finger in her folds, I can feel the wetness. She is ready for me. “Were you dreaming of me, babe,” I ask as I tease her swollen bud.