Tears choked my throat as I nodded my head at Nanette.
"Perfect.” Her reflection was beaming behind me.
"Yes," I whispered as I wiped a tear from my cheek. "It's perfect." I smiled and twirled in the mirror again. And Carter would love it.
"I love it too. It was made for you." Nanette smiled happily. "We'll just take a few measurements to check the length, make sure it doesn’t need taking in. Do you have the shoes you'll be wearing?"
"No." My eyes flashed in disappointment. I'd completely forgotten about shoes.
"No worries, dear. I've brought along some samples, I've got a pair in mind that will be absolutely perfect with this dress." She gestured to the assistant. "The Manolos." She waved her off before dropping to her knees and busying herself with a tape measure.
I watched my reflection in the mirror as my hands slid over the fabric. I imagined Carter’s reaction the first time he would see it. I imagined him waiting for me at the end of some sort of makeshift aisle, since I wasn't even sure what he had planned.
I was never sure if marriage was necessarily in the cards for me, I knew from a young age that children certainly wouldn't be, but when Carter said those words to me, kneeled before me, I'd completely surrendered to the fact that my future was with him.
My heart swelled at the memory. I wanted to run my fingers through his hair for the rest of my life. Gaze into his steely blue eyes, wake up to that crooked smirk. I loved him with my entire heart, fully and completely. I couldn't stay away from Carter because I wasn't meant to. He had consumed me from day one and I had consumed him—we were meant to live our lives with each other. It had been rocky, and I was sure we would continue to face bumps in the road, but I also knew that living without him in my life wasn't an option anymore.
The assistant came back holding a pair of white satin pumps with delicate crystal beading that stretched across the toe. They had a beautiful vintage vibe that would be perfect with the dress. I slipped them on and she took a few more measurements for the hem.
"All done. I'll just shorten the length and it will be perfect. It'll only take me an hour." She smiled at my reflection in the mirror. I nodded and the assistant helped me out of the dress. Truth be told I wasn't ready to take it off, I wanted to wear it for days—it was so beautiful. I sighed wistfully and stroked my fingers along the dress one more time before leaving the room.
I made my way into the kitchen to grab a bottled water before realizing that I didn't even know the price of the dress. I'd been so caught up in its beauty, I hadn't even looked at the tag. My stomach did a few nervous flips remembering some of the other price tags. I could afford the low end of five digits if I put it on my credit card, although I would be paying for it for months and months, however, it would be so worth it. But what if it were the high end? I knew designer wedding gowns could be $25,000 and more. I bit my bottom lip and prayed that wouldn't be the case.
I darted back into the guest bedroom where the designer was working. "Excuse me, I forgot to ask, how much for the dress?"
Nanette lifted her eyes in a reassuring smile. "Not to worry, Miss Austin. It's been taken care of."
"Oh, well, how much was it anyway? Just so I know?" I could find another dress that was in my budget if need be.
"I’ve been told to keep the total to myself, Miss. Something about there was to be no limit on price, and that you weren’t to know the total because, and I quote, 'she is stubborn enough to walk down the aisle naked if she thinks the dress is out of her price range.'" The woman smiled politely.
I scoffed and rolled my eyes that Carter had managed to stay a step ahead of me. Now I would never know if the dress was way under my budget, or through the stratosphere over it. I gritted my teeth and vowed to make him pay for embarrassing and outwitting me all in one go.
"Well, thank you, I guess, for your help." I smiled at her.
"No, thank you, Miss Austin." She beamed. I clenched my teeth and knew in that instant that the dress was way over my budget.
Chapter Four
After the dress designer left I wandered up to the master suite Carter and I were sharing and rifled through my purse for my phone. When we rushed out of the apartment, Cate knew we were away for the weekend but had no idea about the proposal or that we were running off to get married.
I dialed her number. I had no intention of revealing that small slice of information now, but I was going to touch base and let her know we'd made it here safely.
She answered on the first ring and we talked for a while. I told her about the gorgeousness that was Carter's home in the mountains. She asked if we were having fun, and I knew she was referring to the hot sex we usually had. I mumbled that he had actually put a halt to that situation.
"What?" A shriek came over the phone.
"He wants to... abstain until we work some things out." I fibbed. I figured I would meet with some resistance from her about our decision to get married, and I wasn't willing to discuss it from a thousand miles away. It would be easier to break the news when I got home and there was no changing the situation. It wasn't that I was afraid that she could talk me out of it, I knew she couldn't, no one could—and for that reason I wasn't willing to defend myself to someone else.
We chatted for a while longer before she wished me a good vacation and we hung up. I felt immensely guilty for not sharing the biggest news of all with her, but it was the way it had to be for now.
I heard Carter come home a short while later and I wandered downstairs to greet him.
I hit the bottom of the stairs, searching for him. The house was silent. I made my way around the main floor in search of him. Off of the great room I found a small study with the door ajar. I peeked my head in to find Carter on the phone. When he looked up I gave him a smile and a small wave but before I could leave he gestured me in to sit on his lap.
I sat down as he continued his phone conversation. His warm hand smoothed up and down my back as I listened to his deep voice talk to the caller on the other end of the line.
Carter continued a few more minutes before finishing his phone call and then placed a sweet kiss on the back of my neck.
"Did you have lunch?" I asked him.
"No, I have a few more calls to make and then we'll find something."
"I’ll leave you then. I just wanted to check in." I started to get off his lap before his hands slid to my hips and held me firmly.
"Stay here, I won't be long." He ran one hand up my back and rubbed. I smiled and nodded before his phone rang again.
He answered the phone in a clipped voice.
I fingered through some of the paperwork on his desk absentmindedly as he stroked up and down my back softly. A framed picture sat on his desk and I picked it up to inspect it.
It was Carter and I assumed his parents and siblings outside the Aspen house. An attractive older woman that I assumed was his mom was strikingly beautiful with a warm smile on her face. His father was handsome with salt-and-pepper hair and a charming grin. Carter had one arm wrapped around his mom, and another wrapped around what I figured was his younger sister, who was petite with the same dark hair and bright smile as her mom. Next to her was who I assumed was his brother; a guy who looked similar to Carter, except taller and with the same dark hair as his mom and sister. He had a free-spirited grin spread across his face.
The warmth and happiness on Carter's face warmed my heart. He wasn't a controlling CEO, or businessman, or playboy, he was at home with his family, carefree and loved. Maybe the only place he felt happy and comfortable. They were clearly his soft place to fall. I hoped that I would be that for Carter someday. Our relationship had been so tumultuous, a thought dashed through my brain that maybe we would only ever cause each other pain.
I set the picture down and took a deep breath, never averting my eyes from the beautiful smile on Carter's face that was frozen in time.
Carter and I had the spectacular moments too; we just had to find a way to work through the rou
gh ones. Carter must have sensed my unease because he slid his hand up underneath my shirt to make contact with my skin. His fingers slid past the delicate straps of my bra and up to the back of my neck where he ghosted his fingertips and then began to rub in small circles. I sighed deep and closed my eyes. There was nowhere I’d rather be in that moment than perched right on this beautiful man's lap.
I turned to face him and snaked both of my arms around his waist and slid my hands beneath his shirt to touch his velvety soft skin. I laid my head on his shoulder and snuggled into his neck while he continued to talk on the phone. His other hand tightened around my waist and dipped underneath the waistband of my jeans to tease the flesh.
Carter finished his phone call abruptly and then placed his other hand on my thigh.
"Are you okay, beautiful girl?" He slid an arm around my body and rubbed my back.
"Yes," I whispered. He brought one palm up to stroke down my long hair lovingly.
"Promise?"
"Yes. I love you." I pulled back to look in his eyes. "I just want to make sure we're right doing this. That you're not having second thoughts. We've fought so much…" I trailed off, worried that he would change his mind.
"I’m right here with you. There's nowhere else I would rather be but here, marrying you tomorrow. If you're still with me." He tilted my chin up with his hand. "Are you with me?" he whispered.
I nodded as tears sprang to my eyes.
"No tears." He smoothed one away with the pad of his thumb. "We're going to be so great, Eva. I promise. There's no one else for me but you." He kissed me reassuringly and his hand snaked around my neck to hold me gently against him.
"I love you." He pulled away.
"I love you, too." I rested my forehead on his with a smile.
"Good. Now let's go eat." He gave me that sexy, crooked grin and stood, grasping me firmly to him. I wrapped my legs around his waist and clung to him as he carried me out of the office and into the kitchen, teasing my lips with his own the entire way.
Later that night we sat in the hot tub on the terrace off the master bedroom. The air was chilly but the water was warm and soothing and just what my body needed. We had a sweeping view of the valley with the city lights of Aspen nestled in the center and the mountains in the distance. We'd had pizza delivered for dinner and now Carter poured us wine and insisted we needed to relax before the big event tomorrow.
He'd spent the afternoon making calls and coordinating a venue and photographer for tomorrow. I'm sure he was paying out the ear for the last minute arrangements, but he was adamant that we would have the perfect day. I tried to tell him it would be perfect no matter what, but he wasn't hearing any of it.
He'd also teased me incessantly about seeing my dress. While we may not be having a traditional wedding, I wanted to keep a few of the traditions intact, and that was one of them. I knew he would love the lacy dress, so I wanted the first time he saw it to be when I was walking down the aisle to marry him.
Something had been nagging at me all day, but I didn't want to ruin Carter's good mood. It had been a sore spot for us, and maybe still was for him, but I couldn't get the thought out of my head.
"Can I ask you something?"
"Anything." He reached for my hand under the water.
"Why did you and Madeleine break up?"
He assessed me quietly for a minute, probably to determine if this was still a sore subject for me.
"I was young. She was… demanding. We dated for a year and she had been hinting for a while that she wanted to take the next step. I think even then I knew I didn't love her, not really, but I knew I didn't want to lose her. So many people in my life, they're not real friends, not trustworthy, other than my family, I didn't let people in my inner circle, until Madeleine. So when she pushed I decided to settle. I thought it was better that than losing her."
"How long were you engaged?"
"Only a few months. She got worse; I think since she thought she'd gotten her way on marriage, she could demand other things. And I'm not really one to take orders." He shot me a half smile. "I quickly realized that I didn't love her, not really. So I broke it off." He shrugged.
"How did she take it?"
"Surprisingly well. I don't think she loved me either. She's with John now; I introduced you at the gala, he's much older, rich, and lets her do whatever she wants, I think she's happier that way."
"I saw the picture of your family in the office. They seem lovely."
"They are. They're great; the best thing that's ever happened to me, before a beautiful girl spilled champagne on my suit, anyway." He squeezed my hand with a smile. "They'll love you."
"Tell me about them." I took another sip of my wine.
"Derek, my brother, is hilarious. Wild and inappropriate, popular with the girls; sometimes raunchy, but never in a mean way. Emma is the sweetest. She's the youngest and full of life, she loves to shop, so you'll have that in common."
I rolled my eyes.
"I’ve told her about you. She can't wait to meet you."
My eyes widened in surprise.
"In fact she wanted us to come to my parents’ house this weekend, but then so much happened…" he trailed off. "Anyway, she wanted to know all about you. I never really talk about the women I date, much less bring them home to meet the family. She knows you're special." He gave me that delicious panty-melting grin.
"And my mom, Kara, she's amazing. She's warm and understanding, nurturing." He gazed off over the lights of the town and took a sip of his wine. He stared thoughtfully for a few moments and then started again. "When I was little, it was hard. For her the most. They weren't married, she was just out of high school. They had a summer fling and then I happened." He shrugged sadly. "So he just disappeared one night when I was a few months old. Things were already tough when he was around; he drank a lot, and couldn’t keep a steady job. He went out drinking with his friends one night and never came back." He finished softly.
"I’m sorry, Carter." I held his hand tightly under the warm water.
"So after a few days, once she realized he wasn't coming home, she moved back in with her parents. We lived there for a few years; she worked, but they were hard on her. They were disappointed. So she worked two jobs and finally saved enough to start a small catering business. It started to do well enough that she could move out. Her goal was to be self reliant, to get out from under the umbrella of my grandparents. She was determined to overcome the odds, and she did. She was miraculous. I grew up with her cooking and baking all hours of the day and night. It was great. Even then, when things were hard and the months she wasn't sure we could make rent, she had such high spirits. She was an inspiration—is an inspiration.
When I was five she met James while she was catering a party at the golf club. He instantly fell for her. And he took me in. He took me fishing, played softball with me; a year later they got married and a year after that Derek was born; Emma came another year later. James saved her; she was so great those years it was just the two of us, but I could tell she was sad. James is so good to her; he makes her happy." The corners of his mouth lifted in a sheepish smile.
"We struggled so much when I was little, I swore I would never be in that place again. That's why I'm a little on the controlling side. I refused to ever be faced with the possibility of not being able to afford food or a place to live. We didn't have to worry once my mom married James, but even then she still worked because she liked to." He paused for a moment and swirled the wine in his glass.
"The need to control, it just makes me feel better. When things are out of my control I live in a constant state of anxiety. When I was a kid I was plagued with this idea that I wasn't good enough for my dad to stay. I have this thing about the people I love leaving me…" He trailed off thoughtfully.
"I haven’t heard from him since, he never tried to find me. That's why I don’t let many people in—if I care too much—I have this ridiculous fear that it's inevitable that they'll leave.
It keeps me up at night sometimes. Believe me, I’ve had a lot of sleepless nights since we've been together. So there it is, my life story." He gave me a wry smile.
"From day one I’ve gone after the things I’ve wanted, and since then it's always worked out for me, in business and pleasure." He grinned at me out of the corner of his eye. I sloshed some water at him with a grin.
"Wait a minute." I narrowed my eyes at him. "Did you know I was at the coffee shop that day after the party? You didn't just happen to wander in for coffee did you?"
He arched an amused eyebrow at me. "No, Evangeline. There's an espresso bar on the main floor of The Hancock. I don't need to leave the building to get my coffee." A smirk flirted on his lips.
"So, how did you know? If you were watching me, that's seriously creepy, Carter. Like full-on stalker, creepy." I gave him a pointed look.
"No, I wasn't staked out outside your apartment." He laughed and then brought his hand out of the water and touched it to my bottom lip.
I closed my eyes as my body shivered at his touch.
"I did go to your apartment, though. I wanted to take you to lunch. I was going to insist you go out with me in repayment for staining my favorite suit." He gave me a gorgeous grin. "But you weren't there. And Cate was happy to tell me that you were at the coffee shop down the street." I had no doubt he'd charmed that information out of her, and I knew it wouldn't have taken much considering Cate was just as affected by him as every other female.
"How did you know where I lived?" I breathed softly.
"Research, Evangeline." He traced his thumb around the curve of my lips. "When I saw you that night at the party, something hit me. When I looked in your eyes, my whole world froze. You were beautiful. Your smile lit the room. And when you laughed your eyes crinkled." He tenderly traced his thumb across my cheekbone and over my eyelids. "And when our eyes met across the room it was like I was hit straight in the chest. Your eyes were so soft and genuine. You captivated me." He leaned in and skimmed my lips with a featherlight kiss. "I knew I had to have you."
Rapture and Lace (Lace #3) (Lace Series) Page 3