A New Song
Page 45
Marion Fieldwalker poked Sam in the ribs. “Who’s that?”
“Good gracious alive!” Sam whispered, as if to himself.
As Father Tim touched the forehead of the man kneeling before him, it seemed that an electric shock was born from the convergence of their flesh, it arced and flashed along his arm like a bolt.
“I anoint you, Morris, in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit, and beseech the mercy of our Lord Jesus Christ to seal forever what is genuine in your heart. May God be with you always, my brother.”
“The Lord drew me up
out of an horrible pit,
out of the miry clay,
Alleluia!
and set my feet upon a rock,
Alleluia!
steadying my steps and
establishing my goings,
Alleluia!
And he has put a new song
in my mouth, a song of praise
to our God!
Alleluia! Alleluia! Amen!”
“ ‘No one,’ ” he told Barnabas as they walked down the lane to the beach, “ ‘appreciates the very special genius of your conversation as the dog does.’ ”
His dog did not reply.
“Christopher Morley said that.”
Barnabas plodded ahead.
“Don’t you think there’s a certain truth in it?”
What if someone heard him out here talking to his dog? Then again, why couldn’t a man talk to his dog whenever he took the notion?
“Ah, my friend, what a sunset this is going to be.” He felt positively jaunty, as if spring were luring something out of him that hadn’t emerged in a very long while.
He’d asked his wife to come along, but she had a far more important and monumental thing to do than watch a spectacular sunset on a glorious evening; indeed, she was washing her hair.
He’d experienced this feeling of lightness only once before since coming here. It was the day he walked to Ernie’s for the first time, free as a bird. Whole hours of freedom had lain before him in a strange new place with secrets yet to be revealed. Why couldn’t all of life give one that feeling, the feeling of being on the brink of discovery? Wasn’t every moment a revelation? Who ever knew, after all, what lay around the bend?
Ah, well, he’d probably be moping around like the rest of the common horde in a day or two. He’d better sop up this carefree business while he could.
He found himself whistling the organ piece from yesterday’s service; difficult though it was, it contained an inner melodic line that he found thoroughly fascinating. What a miracle it had all been; he shook his head with the wonder of it, remembering the stunned delight of his congregation, and Mamie’s soulful joy. Indeed, there had been enough gladness in the day to make memories for a month of Sundays.
They left the pavement and went along the boardwalk through the dunes. “Sit,” he said, standing on the walk before they trotted down the steps. Watching the color begin to wash over the water, it suddenly occurred to him that St. John’s should haul some chairs out here for an early Sunday service.
What a nave, what a sanctuary! And the ceiling beat any fan vaulting he’d ever laid eyes on, hands down. Why on earth they hadn’t held this year’s sunrise service right here was beyond him; he must be as dumb as a rock.
Well, then, maybe next year. If there was a next year. Very likely, St. John’s would call their priest by winter.
They went down the steps and along the beach, not running, not jogging, but strolling. About a quarter of a mile into the walk, he let Barnabas off the leash.
That sunset is smokin’, he thought, sitting on the sand to take off his shoes and socks. He remained sitting, looking, wondering.
It had been a joy to see Janette Tolson in church with her children yesterday, her life restored and settled. But it wasn’t a joy to see the toll it was taking on her to go it alone, sewing until two in the morning, and rising early to get the children ready for school and Jonathan off to day care.
He dropped by to see her more often than he should, perhaps, but generally stayed only long enough to assure her of his prayers and encourage her in her work. Single parents were a dime a dozen in today’s world. Such a thing rolled off the back of modern society like water off a duck; it had become the common run of so-called civilized life.
But it hadn’t become common to him, not in the least. It always hurt him to see the damage and confusion and, too often, the utter desperation of those forced to go it alone. In short, it was a hard row to hoe, and fraught with unique assaults by the Enemy.
The last time he visited, she mustered the courage to ask again, “Have you seen him?” He hadn’t, nor had anyone else, as far as he knew. “He could be dead,” she said, looking across her sewing machine and out the window. “The storm . . .”
It was true. Nobody knew where he was living on the island, or in what sort of circumstances. If the ceiling plaster had narrowly missed Maude Proffitt, who was to say whether the storm had left its fatal mark elsewhere?
But hold on. He was doing the thing he had a made a resolution only yesterday to try to consciously avoid—he was thinking too much. “That young Timothy,” an elder in his mother’s church once said, “he thinks too much.”
He never forgot that offhand remark, though he couldn’t have been more than seven or eight years old. How much thinking was too much, he had wondered, and who was to say? Should he quit thinking anything at all once in a while, and go around with an empty mind? He tried to empty his mind and found it completely impossible to do. Or maybe other people could empty their minds and he was the only one who could not. This was disturbing. On the other hand, were there people who thought too little? As an adult, he occasionally considered that he might know a few. . . .
He whistled for his dog, who bounded out of the surf and stood before him, shaking salt water forty ways from Sunday.
“Sit,” he said. Barnabas sat.
He remembered the time when the only thing he could get his dog to do was eat. It was years before he sat when asked, or came when called. Old age, that’s what it was. Old age and wisdom! If Barnabas had been, say, two years old when he came to the rectory—and that was seven years ago—then in dog years he was . . . sixty-three. About the same age as his master. OK, then, it wasn’t old age at all, no indeed, it was merely wisdom.
So thinking, he got up and ran down the beach, his dog loping beside him.
They had turned into the lane when Barnabas stopped and growled low in his throat.
It was dark now; a single street lamp burned just up the road. He saw that someone approached them, thrown into silhouette by the light.
“Who is it?” he asked. “Who’s there?”
“Father Kavanagh?”
He recognized the voice at once. “Yes.”
“I’m sorry to startle you.” Though the figure walked closer, Barnabas stopped growling. In fact, his tail was wagging.
The white shirt gleamed like a pearl. “I’ve been hoping we could talk.”
“I’ve been hoping that, too.”
“If you have time.”
Father Tim reached out, extending his hand into the darkness. “My time,” he said, “is yours.”