Both women studied the photo. At the sound of their oohs of appreciation, Lily felt her muscles relax. Another sale, she told herself, trying to muster a token sense of accomplishment at the feat. Her efforts fell flat. No matter what she did, an unease seemed to have hung over her head ever since leaving Eric’s office this morning.
Her mouth felt dry at the thought of Eric. Lily returned her plate of chocolate cake to the table and picked up her glass of ice water. She’d been on edge the entire day, wondering what Eric might do, wondering what she might do if Eric turned her down.
She could go back to the fertility clinic and browse through the catalog of nameless donors. The thought left her cold inside. Height, weight, hair color...the whole process felt as personal as shopping for next fall’s wardrobe. Not what she had in mind when selecting a potential father for her baby.
She could give up. Maybe a baby just wasn’t in her future. She considered what her life would be without a baby. The lonely nights, the empty house. No one to love. No one to share her life. A long shiver racked her body.
“Are you okay, Mrs. Gerard?”
Momma was watching her, concern in her eyes.
Lily put her glass on the table. “I’m fine. I just caught a chill.”
“A chill? It’s a 105 out there today.” Momma motioned to the window overlooking the tiled courtyard.
Lily followed the direction of the woman’s hand, then wished she hadn’t. Across the courtyard, just beyond the Spanish-style water fountain, Eric was bearing down on the bakery.
Sans tie, his white shirt sleeves rolled up a couple of notches, mirrored sunglasses covering his eyes, he looked relaxed and dangerous. His loose-hipped swagger caught the attention of more than one passing female shopper as he crossed the courtyard of shops.
Lily felt an unexpected surge of irritation. How dared he be so relaxed, when she’d been on pins and needles all day long? He passed by the Wedding Alcove’s window on his way to the bakery’s front door. A tinkle of a bell heralded his arrival.
Eric’s slow glance around the room came to rest on her. He lowered the sunglasses. Despite his sober expression, his brown eyes sparkled, revealing a familiar hint of amusement. Lily froze, unable to move from her chair. Yet she couldn’t drag her eyes away from him, either.
With a grin, Eric gave her a mock salute. Before she could say a word, he disappeared behind the counter and into the kitchen. The sound of giggling females followed his exit.
Lily closed her eyes and counted to ten. This wasn’t the first time Eric had visited her bakery. And it wasn’t the first time he’d charmed her staff. But it was the first time his flirting bothered her.
Fifteen minutes later, she ushered Momma and the young bride-to-be out the door and placed the Closed sign in the front window. Late-day shadows stretched across the courtyard outside the bakery. As though on cue, the kitchen staff sauntered into the showroom, ready to depart for the day.
“‘Night, Lily.”
Ann, her assistant baker, gave her arm a friendly squeeze. Ann’s usual reluctance to leave Lily alone in the bakery was absent this evening.
She nodded toward the kitchen. “Eric’s waiting for you.”
“I know.” Lily forced a smile. “See you tomorrow.”
The doorbell chimed Ann’s exit. Lily’s heart pounded in her chest. She and Eric were alone.
Slowly she crossed the showroom and entered the kitchen. The staff had cleaned and polished the room from top to bottom. The stainless-steel counters gleamed. The tile floor sparkled. Perched on a chair in the middle of all this cleanliness was Eric, munching on a thick slice of devil’s food cake.
He waved his fork at her. “Lily, you make the best chocolate cake in Phoenix.”
“You’re going to spoil your dinner,” she scolded him, ignoring the compliment.
“Okay, Mom,” he said, grinning.
Her heart did a flip-flop at his choice of words. He must have noticed a change in her expression. He sobered, his grin fading. Without another word, he reached into his shirt pocket and drew out a sheet of paper. He placed it on the counter and scooted it toward her.
Lily pulled up a stool to the counter and sat down across from Eric. Her hand shook as she reached for the donor consent form. Her gaze flew down the length of the paper. There in a bold flourish was Eric’s signature.
She gulped in a deep breath of air and pressed the form to her chest. She glanced across the counter. Eric was watching her.
“Thank you, Eric,” she said, her voice barely a whisper.
He nodded, stabbing the cake with his fork. “It’s been witnessed and notarized.”
Startled, she glanced at the form. Mrs. Hunter’s signature was neatly penned below Eric’s. “You told your secretary? What did she say?”
“Nothing I do surprises Mrs. Hunter.” His devilish grin returned. “Don’t worry, Lily. She’s the soul of discretion.”
A strained silence filled the room.
Eric was the first to break it. “So, now what do we do?”
“You’ll need to have a blood test to make sure that our blood types are compatible. I’ll call the clinic first thing tomorrow morning. Then we wait. I’ve been taking my temperature and charting my cycle for the past few months. You probably won’t have to—” she cleared her throat “—to donate for another couple of weeks. I’ll give you a call when it’s time.”
Eric shoved the remainder of his cake around on his plate, no longer seeming interested in eating.
Lily pushed herself to her feet and strode to her office. She returned, gripping a pamphlet in her hand. “The doctor gave me this to read. You may want to read it, too, so you have an idea what to expect.”
Reluctantly, Eric took the pamphlet.
She pointed to the back page. “You can start practicing a few of these things as soon as possible.”
“No smoking. No alcohol. No hot tubs.” He glanced at her. “No briefs?”
She shrugged. “Boxers are better for your circulation. If you don’t have any, there’s a men’s store just across the courtyard. I could—”
“That’s quite all right, Lily. I can buy my own boxers.” He continued reading. “Abstinence?” His voice boomed. “I feel as though I’ve signed up for two weeks at a monastery.”
“Eric, these are just suggestions, ways to stoke up your sperm count.” A small vein at his temple pulsed a vigorous beat. Her nervousness grew. He couldn’t change his mind. Not now. “The higher your sperm count, the fewer times you’ll have to...to donate.”
“Times?” The single word echoed against the walls of the empty kitchen.
She smiled weakly. “Those little tadpoles don’t always hit the mark on the first try, you know.”
“How many times?”
She shrugged. “Two, maybe three times tops. Are you still going to help me?”
“I said I would, didn’t I?”
Slouched in his seat, staring down at the pamphlet, he appeared anything but thrilled at the prospect.
“Eric, why did you agree to do this for me?” She winced as her voice trembled.
Still staring down at the pamphlet, he remained quiet for a long moment. “Not out of guilt,” he said finally. He looked up, his brown eyes penetrating. “I want you to know something, Lily. Our friendship may have started out of obligation, but that’s not what’s kept it going three years. I care about you.”
“I care about you, too.” She felt the nagging burden of doubt being lifted from her shoulders. Now more than ever she needed the reassurance of Eric’s friendship. “So, why are you helping me?”
“I may not agree with your decision. I may not even want to help you.” He slammed the pamphlet down on the counter. “But if it’s important to you, I have to help.”
She glanced away, trying to swallow the lump of guilt that had formed in her throat. She should do the honorable thing and let him off the hook. But having a baby was too important for her.
“Now it’s my
turn,” he said.
She glanced at him in surprise.
“Why did you ask me to be a sperm donor?” he inquired, his expression serious.
His question caught her off-guard. When she’d decided on artificial insemination, Eric had been her one and only choice. She knew he was kind, healthy and intelligent. She didn’t know much about his family background. Lily stole an appreciative glance at the sculptured lines of his face. Obviously he came from a good gene pool.
She bit her lower lip. Drop-dead good looks notwithstanding, the most important reason she had chosen Eric to father her child was that he was her best friend. And in all the years they’d been friends, he’d shown no romantic interest in her. She felt safe asking him to be a sperm donor. Eric was in no danger of being next on her list of dead lovers.
“At first I considered an anonymous donor,” she said, breaking the silence. “But that seemed so impersonal. And asking someone I knew seemed risky. What if he got the wrong idea and tried to pressure me into a relationship? I can’t risk falling in love and marrying again. I won’t cause another man’s death.”
Eric released a terse breath of air. “Lily, I want to make this perfectly clear. I don’t believe for a minute that you had anything to do with David’s death.”
“It doesn’t matter whether you believe it, Eric. I do. Which is why you’re going to make the perfect sperm donor.”
His gaze was wary. “Oh? Why is that?”
“Because we’re friends, Eric. Just friends, nothing more. If there was any sort of physical attraction between us, surely it would have surfaced by now.”
Eric said nothing. He shifted in his chair.
Lily continued, “Besides, I know about your aversion to marriage. Not that I agree with you. I think, if you really wanted to, you’d make some woman a wonderful husband.”
“Here we go again.”
“I can’t help it if I believe in the sanctity of marriage. For everyone but me, that is. What’s wrong with settling down with one special woman?”
“For one thing, we live in a community-property state.”
“This is the nineties, Eric. Not every woman is after your money.”
He humphed his disbelief.
She glared at him. “You really are a cynic, aren’t you?”
“I’ve worked hard for what I have, Lily. If you’d helped end as many marriages as I have, you’d have doubts, also.”
“Being a divorce lawyer has warped you.”
“Owning a bakery specializing in wedding cakes has left you with a lopsided view of marriage. Believe me, most couples may start out their marriages with romantic dreams of a happy future, but chances are they’ll end up in divorce court, slugging it out to the bitter end.”
They’d been through this conversation before. Lily had given up trying to convince Eric that bachelorhood was a lonely state. They simply didn’t see marriage in the same light. To her, marriage was a beautiful, unattainable dream. She would do anything to be guaranteed a lifetime of happiness with the man she loved. Eric, on the other hand, broke out in a cold sweat at the thought of making a commitment, whether financial or emotional.
She sighed. “At least I was right. You’re going to be the perfect sperm donor.”
He raised a brow in silent question.
“As a friend, you’re wonderful. But as a prospective husband, you’re terrible. Face it, Eric. The desert would have to freeze over before I’d marry someone as cynical as you.”
Chapter Two
Lily Gerard had some nerve.
Ten days later, Eric found himself still stewing over Lily’s parting words. Face it, Eric. The desert would have to freeze over before I’d marry someone as cynical as you. He ground his teeth, recalling the way she’d laughed, rubbing salt into an already wounded pride. What’s so funny about telling him he was the last man on earth she’d consider marrying?
Why was he letting it bother him?
With her family’s track record of killing off husbands, he should be glad he wasn’t on Lily’s list of possible marriage candidates.
But still, after he had agreed to do her a favor—correction, a huge favor—she’d had the nerve to insult him. Agreeing to be a sperm donor should rate some sort of respect, shouldn’t it?
And what about this no-physical-attraction nonsense? Eric scowled. Lots of women found him appealing. Tons of them, in fact. Wasn’t he good enough for Lily?
He’d always considered Lily an exceptionally beautiful woman. He’d have to be a complete idiot not to be tempted by her physical attributes. Not that he’d ever acted on that attraction. The time never seemed right. First there had been David’s death. Lily had needed comfort, not someone trying to get her into his bed. Then their friendship got in the way.
Eric had dated plenty of women. But he’d never had a female friend before. He felt comfortable with Lily. He could take her out for dinner and the theater without worrying how the night would end. He could relax and talk to her about things he wouldn’t dream of discussing with another woman. If their relationship took a turn and became intimate, all this would end. Sex had a way of changing a relationship. He didn’t want to lose his friend.
His frown deepened. If sex changed a relationship, he couldn’t help but wonder what having a baby would do to it.
He released an impatient breath. Despite his reservations, he’d gone to the fertility clinic and gotten his blood test. He’d even waited at the clinic long enough to find out they were a perfect match. Did he hear any of this from Lily? Hell, no. It had been well over a week since she’d called. If she wanted to talk to him, fine. But she was going to have to be the one to call and apologize first.
A niggling of doubt worked its way into his conscience, cooling his temper. He wasn’t quite sure why he expected Lily to apologize. She’d spoken nothing but the truth. Over the years, he had acquired a cynical attitude toward love and marriage. But dammit, he had a right to be disillusioned.
He’d been engaged once, something he would never admit to Lily. It would give her too much hope for reforming his supposedly wretched bachelor existence. The engagement had been brief, lasting all of five months. Just out of law school, with a new job and a nagging college debt to repay, he still had had time to fall in love, or so he thought.
His ex-fiancée had been born to wealthy parents. Since he himself had come from a financially strapped background, her aristocratic breeding had been the one thing that had attracted him. It also proved to be their relationship’s undoing. She didn’t understand his need to work long hours in order to make his career a success. During their short engagement, they’d argued constantly over money, or rather the lack of it, and her feelings of neglect.
Gradually, her complaints had lessened. What he didn’t realize was that she’d found someone else to ease her loneliness. Eric could still recall the shock he’d felt when she’d told him their engagement was off. That she was going to marry a retired businessman who had nothing but time and money to spend on her.
He drew in a slow breath, fighting the bitterness that threatened. He hadn’t loved her, he realized now. After all these years, her betraying him with another man didn’t bother him nearly as much as her using his lack of money as an excuse for leaving.
Eric pushed the painful memories from his mind. He’d wasted enough time brooding over the fickleness of love and marriage. He had work that demanded his full attention. He picked up a file from his desk, then slammed it back down. “I’ve got to be at a deposition in fifty minutes. Where’s that accounting report?”
Mrs. Hunter reached across the desk and picked up a file. “Right where I left it for you last night. What’s the matter with you, Eric? These past few days you’ve been in a real snit.”
Scowling, Eric took the report. “I haven’t been that bad, have I?”
“The worst I’ve ever seen you. Something’s got your shorts in a wad. What’s up?”
“Shorts?” His voice thundered. “What makes
you think I’m wearing shorts?”
Mrs. Hunter gave an exasperated sigh. “It’s just an expression, Eric.”
A shrill ring interrupted them. Looking relieved at having a reason to end their conversation, Mrs. Hunter reached for the phone. “Eric Mitchell’s office.” Her face softened into a smile. “Hello, Lily.”
Eric rolled his eyes at the sudden change in her attitude.
“Of course, he’s right here.” Mrs. Hunter handed him the phone. “It’s Lily. Behave yourself.”
“Hello,” he said sharply.
“Hi.”
Lily’s voice sounded hesitant, almost shy. His anger melted away. He sat down in his chair. “Sorry I haven’t called. I’ve been busy.”
“That’s okay. I understand.” Her tone told him she really did understand. She knew he’d been pouting.
“What can I do for you, Lily?”
She laughed. “Funny you should ask. It’s time.”
“Time?” Aware that his secretary was standing nearby, he swiveled his chair around to face the windows. “Time for what?”
“My temperature’s busting right off the chart, Eric. Now’s the best time for your donation.”
“Now? You said in two weeks.” He reached for his desk calendar. “That’s not for another four days.”
“We’re dealing with Mother Nature, Eric. Not a court docket,” she said, her voice indignant.
Eric held his hand over the mouthpiece and looked at his secretary. “Isn’t there a letter or something you can type?”
“If you want some privacy, Eric, all you have to do is say so.” Mrs. Hunter turned on her heel, muttering.
Eric winced at the colorful language coming from his secretary’s mouth. When the door closed behind her, he returned the phone to his ear. “Lily, be reasonable. I’ve got to be at a deposition in less than an hour.”
“What are you saying, Eric? You’ve changed your mind?”
“No, I’m not saying that at all,” he lied. Since agreeing to be a sperm donor, second thoughts seemed to loom over him. He released a slow, resigned breath. “Look, I’ll see if I can work something out.”
Hazardous Husband Page 2