Hazardous Husband

by Christine Scott

  She breathed in sharply. He was being deliberately crude. She’d hurt him, and now he was lashing back at her.

  “When are you going to stop hiding behind that curse of yours, Lily?” He shot her an impatient look. “Are you ever going to tire of playing the grieving widow?”

  She swallowed hard at the lump of emotion in her throat.

  He raked a hand through his hair, looking frustrated and angry. “And after the baby is born? What guarantee do I have that you won’t change your mind and decide not to marry me after all? Do you expect me to play Uncle Eric to my own child?”

  Tears stung her eyes. She wanted to give in, to cry for the pain they were causing each other. “I wouldn’t do that to you.”

  “That’s right. Because I won’t let you. I’ll take you to court, Lily. I’ll file for custody if I have to.”

  “You can’t,” she gasped.

  He narrowed a gaze at her. “Watch me.”

  A weight pressed against her chest, making it difficult for her to breathe. “You signed a contract. The donor release form.”

  “I’m a lawyer, Lily. Breaking contracts is what I do.”

  She fought the rising tide of panic. “You wouldn’t do that do me.”

  He looked at her, one brow raised in question.

  “You wouldn’t hurt me that way.” She swallowed hard. “You’re my friend, Eric.”

  He stared at her for a long moment, unspeaking. Then, with a shake of his head, he laughed. There was no amusement in his tone. “It all comes down to being friends, doesn’t it, Lily? We became friends because of David. As a friend, you asked me to be a sperm donor. Now you’re asking me to give up my child because we’re friends.”

  “I’m sorry,” she said. Her voice sounded weak, the words hopelessly inadequate.

  “I’m sorry, too.” He averted his eyes, staring at the tiled floor beneath his feet. “You’re right. Taking you to court would be cruel. I can’t hurt you that way.” He lifted his gaze. His expression was devoid of emotion. But his eyes were filled with pain. “Being your friend just isn’t enough. If you won’t marry me, then I can’t see you. It hurts me too much.”

  She took a step toward him, then stopped. “Eric, I didn’t plan for any of this to happen.”

  “I didn’t plan to fall in love with you, either.”

  The words echoed in the quiet room.

  He loved her.

  Lily felt her heart go out to him. She wanted to comfort him and tell him that his love was returned. But she knew it would only cause him more pain, because she couldn’t carry out the promise of love. She didn’t have the courage to marry him. She’d rather deal with a broken heart than take a chance and lose him forever.

  “Lily.”

  She looked at him questioningly.

  “We’re in my house,” he reminded her, his voice hoarse with emotion. “You’re the one who has to leave.”

  She nodded, feeling numb inside as she hurried from the kitchen. She made it to the front door before she realized she still held the eggs and milk in her hands.

  Eric hadn’t moved from the kitchen counter; his expression was unchanged.

  Without a word, she returned the food to the refrigerator, then turned on her heel to escape.

  “Lily.”

  His voice stopped her.

  “If you change your mind...” The words trailed off. He released a harsh breath, then said nothing.

  Lily heard the frustration in his voice. She felt his pain. In Eric’s arms, she’d thought their love was invincible. She dared to hope for a life with him. She should have known she was destined to spend her life alone. At least she’d always have her memories. And his child.

  With all the strength she could muster, she forced herself to leave.

  Chapter Twelve

  Lily stepped back, gripping the pastry bag in her hand and surveyed her handiwork. In silver icing on the top of an anniversary cake due to be sent out that afternoon she’d scrolled the words Happy Twenty-fifth, Lily and Eric. She groaned with frustration. It was the second time in a row she’d made the same mistake.

  She couldn’t shake thoughts of Eric.

  Guilt was ruining her life.

  She plopped down onto a stool and allowed herself a moment to wallow in self-pity. In the two weeks since she’d last seen Eric, her life had gone from bad to worse. Monsoon winds had settled over Phoenix, kicking up unexpected storms and oppressive weather. The days were suffocating. The nights were lonely and restless.

  Despite the fact her appetite had taken a nose dive, she’d been gaining weight at a steady pace. This morning she’d discovered she couldn’t close the zipper of her favorite jeans. She now had large and unappealing to add to her faults, though guilt still made it to the top of the list.

  Guilt for the pain she’d caused Eric.

  Tears burned her eyes. She tried to push the memory of the last time they were together from her mind.

  Her only consolation was keeping busy at the bakery. Now it seemed she couldn’t concentrate on her work. She glared at the cake. Proof of this was staring her in the eye.

  She might as well admit the truth. She missed Eric terribly. Not a minute went by that she didn’t think about him. Their last encounter was as fresh in her mind as though it had happened yesterday. She drew in a shaky breath. She could still see the pain reflected in his brown eyes. Pain she’d caused by refusing to marry him.

  She felt her mood slip another notch as she fell under the heavy weight of self-flagellation. Lily grimaced. She was going beyond wallowing in self-pity.

  The metal legs of the stool rasped against the tiled floor as she scooted to her feet. She picked up a spatula and scraped Lily and Eric off the cake. The defiant gesture didn’t make her feel any better. Her chest tightened. The cake blurred as tears filled her eyes.

  She blinked away the tears and tried to pull herself out of her miserable mood. She wasn’t the only one to blame for her misery. Eric was the one who had insisted they couldn’t see each other. Two weeks had passed without a word from him. Didn’t he care about her? About their baby?

  Of course he cared about her and the baby. Eric could have taken her to court. He could have forced her to recognize his rights as a parent. But he hadn’t done that. He knew the pain a custody battle would cause. He loved her too much to hurt her. He’d proved beyond a doubt that his love was unselfish.

  Lily found herself teetering on the brink of another bout of tears. Being angry felt better, she reminded herself. Why did Eric have to insist on marriage? If he wasn’t so stubborn, they’d still be together, not at opposite ends of Phoenix. Her anger simmered. If she didn’t love him so much, she’d almost say he deserved to marry her. Losing him to the curse couldn’t be any worse than the pain he was putting her through right now.

  Losing him?

  She caught her breath. The realization hit hard. She was mourning Eric as though she’d already lost him. As though he were already dead.

  Eric was right. She’d gotten so good at being a widow, she didn’t know how to be anything else.

  Lily sat down hard on the stool, filled with a new, almost painful awareness. There were no guarantees that they’d spend the rest of their lives together. Instead of acting like the grieving widow, she should be treasuring the moments they did have. She should be with him, grabbing at her chance for happiness with both hands, not blubbering over something that might or might not happen.

  She swallowed hard at the stubborn lump of guilt in her throat. She had a lot to feel guilty about. She’d overreacted to Eric’s brush with a gunman. She’d used it as an excuse to back out of their engagement because she didn’t want to admit the truth.

  She loved him so much she was scared. And she was allowing that fear to control her life, her happiness.

  The admission left her feeling oddly relieved, as though a burden had been lifted from her shoulders. A love as strong as theirs didn’t happen overnight. She’d fallen in love with Eric long
before she’d asked him to be a sperm donor. By asking him, she’d merely taken her first step in admitting her love.

  She sniffed loudly, brushing away a tear. As usual, her realizations were too little, too late. She wouldn’t blame Eric if he’d given up on her. After all, she’d already broken more promises to him than she cared to remember. She’d promised not to let her pregnancy come between their friendship, but it did. She promised to marry him, but she changed her mind.

  Lily slapped the spatula on the counter. She’d had enough self-pity. Somehow she had to convince Eric this time she truly believed they had a chance at forever.

  * * *

  Listlessly Eric picked up a file off his desk and began to read. A new case, Richards v. Richards. This one involved kids. Two boys—Joey, age four; Bobby, age six. His heart skipped a beat. He forced himself to read on. Reason for initiating divorce procedure: irreconcilable differences. He wondered if Joey and Bobby thought the differences in their parents’ marriage were irreconcilable.

  Eric slammed the file back down onto his desk. What was wrong with him? In the highly charged atmosphere surrounding a divorce, an attorney had to stay detached from his clients’ problems. Staying neutral was the only way he could serve their best interests.

  Since he’d allowed Lily to walk out of his life, he’d lost his edge. He couldn’t separate himself from his clients’ emotions. Damn, if he kept this up, he’d end up losing half his cases.

  He glanced at the phone and felt the urge to pick it up. He gave a growl of frustration. How much longer could he hold out? He couldn’t count the number of times he’d started to call Lily, just to slam the receiver down, cursing himself for being a fool.

  He sighed. No, he was worse than a fool. A fool would have given up by now. Lily’s message had been loud and clear. She didn’t need him in her life.

  He’d been wrong.

  She didn’t love him. If she did, they would be married by now.

  He stood, crossing the office to the bank of windows overlooking downtown Phoenix. The truth was, being married didn’t seem as important as it had two weeks ago. He loved her so much that if Lily walked through that door right now he’d take her any way he could get her, marriage or no marriage.

  Music filtered in through the closed door of his office, drawing him out of his brooding thoughts. Eric frowned. Brass horns? Guitars? The music grew louder.

  Eric crossed to his desk and picked up the phone. As he buzzed his secretary, a knock sounded at his door.

  Mrs. Hunter poked her head around the door, a smile stretching across her face. “I think you’d better come out here, boss.”

  Eric scowled. “What the—?”

  “No arguments,” Mrs. Hunter chided. “Just come on.”

  She disappeared.

  Eric released a harsh breath and followed.

  In the outer office a small crowd had gathered. In the center of the crowd stood a mariachi band. Eric recognized Mr. Ramirez immediately. He’d hired Ramirez’s band to play for Lily. Eric felt a niggling of hope rise in his chest. He glanced around the office, looking for her familiar face.

  “Hello, Mr. Mitchell,” Ramirez said, approaching Eric with a broad smile. “We’ve been asked to play for you today. Our first song is about a young man whose heart has been broken. In this song his lover asks for forgiveness.” With a flick of his hand, he motioned for the band to start.

  Loud, beautiful music filled the tiny office. Eric felt the floor vibrating beneath his feet. The paintings on the walls wobbled from their perches. Mrs. Hunter’s phone danced on her desk.

  His fellow office workers were smiling, amused by the spectacle.

  Eric scowled. There was still no sign of Lily. For all he knew, Mrs. Hunter could have ordered the group. She’d been trying to coax him out of his dark mood for the past two weeks. He discarded that idea as quickly as it had risen. No, not Mrs. Hunter. She knew this band would stir up memories of Lily. She wouldn’t be that cruel.

  It had to be Lily. No one else would embarrass him this way. His impatience grew with each beat of the music.

  Finally the song ended.

  “Thank you, Mr. Ramirez,” Eric began. “Now, who—”

  “Our next song is about star-crossed lovers.”

  The music began again, drowning out Eric’s moan of frustration.

  Then he spotted a familiar face. His heart pounded in his chest, competing with the pulsing beat of the brass horns filling his office. Lily was pushing her way through the crowd.

  Soon she stood before him, looking flushed and uncertain. She ran a nervous hand through her auburn curls.

  Eric waited.

  She took a deep breath. “I have a proposition for you, counselor.”

  A slow grin lifted one corner of his mouth. “What sort of proposition?”

  “Don’t worry, it’s definitely not business,” she said. Her expression was sober, but her eyes glittered.

  He crossed his arms over his chest to stop himself from pulling her into a sweeping embrace. “This I have to hear.”

  “It’s like this. I’m looking for a husband.”

  Eric’s grin widened.

  Lily continued, the words spilling out in a rush. “Not just any man will fit the bill, mind you. He must have a persistent nature.”

  “You mean stubborn?”

  “Uh-huh.” Lily nodded. “He must be ready to take on the challenges life may throw his way.”

  “Like curses and bad luck.”

  Lily smiled. “Exactly.”

  He tried to appear uncertain. “Sounds like a pretty tough job. What sort of benefits could your husband expect?”

  “A lifetime of love and happiness.”

  He raised a brow. “A lifetime?”

  “I can’t promise forever, but how does the next forty or fifty years sound to you?”

  Relief flooded his body. “Not bad, not bad at all.”

  Lily snapped her fingers. “Oh, did I mention there’s an extra bonus to sweeten the pot? A baby who needs her father.”

  “Her, eh? Still think it’s a girl?”

  “Girls run in my family.” Lily smiled. “Some things just can’t be changed. So what do you say, counselor? Are you ready to accept my proposal?”

  “And if I’m not?”

  She waved a hand at the mariachi band. “Mr. Ramirez will just keep playing until you change your mind.”

  He chuckled. “In that case, you’ve got yourself a deal.”

  Eric pulled her into his arms and kissed her soundly.

  A cheer went up throughout the room. The music swelled.

  Breathless, they broke apart.

  “I love you, Eric,” she shouted.

  His heart soared. The words sounded like heaven. He knew how hard they had been for her to say. “I love you, too, Lily,” he said, pressing his lips to her ear so she could hear him over the noise. “I have a confession to make. In another two minutes, I would have been out this door, looking for you. I’d already decided I wasn’t going to let another day go by without you in my life.”

  Her eyes shimmered with emotion.

  “I’m not taking any more chances. Lily, I know this judge who’d be more than willing to perform a wedding ceremony any time—any day.”

  Her radiant smile melted the last of his doubts.

  “What are we waiting for, counselor? Let’s get married. Now.”

  Epilogue

  “Whew.” Lily collapsed against the comfort of the leather bucket seat. Slowly she unclenched the death grip she had on the door handle. “That was a bad one.”

  Eric glanced at his watch, then shot her a concerned look. “Are you okay?”

  “I’m fine. Watch the road.”

  He released an exasperated breath. “Lily, would you relax? It’s two o’clock in the morning. The streets are practically deserted. I’m only going twenty in a forty-mile-an-hour zone. Nothing’s going to happen.”

  Another spasm of pain gripped her stomach. “
Ahhhh...”

  Eric checked his watch. “Two minutes. They’re only two minutes apart. What does that mean?”

  “It means,” she said, her teeth clenched, “if you don’t step on it, Eric, we’re going to have this baby in the front seat of your Porsche.”

  He needed no further encouragement. Eric tromped on the accelerator. Tires squealing, the speedometer jumped to fifty. The momentum pressed Lily farther into her seat.

  “Eric—” She clutched the door handle again. This time in fear.

  He patted her knee. “Hold on, Lily. With our history of bad luck, I’m not taking any chances. You are not—I repeat—not delivering this baby in the front seat of my car.”

  The pain crested, taking her breath away. She stopped arguing.

  Soon Eric pulled into the hospital’s emergency room entrance. Within minutes, she was whisked into the delivery room.

  “Are you okay?” she asked her husband between the pains.

  The delivery-room nurse gave her an incredulous stare. “Honey, you’re the one having this baby. Not him.”

  Lily smiled sheepishly. “He has a weak stomach.”

  The nurse shot him a skeptical glance. “A fainter, eh?”

  Eric, now dressed in hospital greens, lifted his chin defiantly. “I’ll be fine. I’ve been through Lamaze classes. I’ve got a certificate to prove it.”

  The nurse snorted. “I’ve scraped plenty of men off the floor who’ve said the exact same thing.”

  “Look, I’m a lawyer and I’ve been shot at.” He narrowed his eyes. “I can handle anything.”

  “Right,” the nurse said. She scooted a stool toward Eric. “Start getting dizzy, sit down. Got it?”

  “Got it,” Eric grumbled.

  Lily grinned.

  Eric squeezed her hand. “You’ve got to stop worrying about me and concentrate on yourself and our daughter. We’ve made it this far. Nothing’s going to stop us now.”

  “I hope you’re right.” She clutched his hand as another pain gripped her body. “I think this is it. I feel I have to push.”

  “Already?” Eric looked worried.

  The doctor and staff of nurses took over. In a flurry of motion and a bout of seemingly endless pain, their child was born.