How The Cookie Crumbles

by Ting, Melanie

  “Really? Because every time I turn around, you’re there with your tongue hanging out. He’s just not that into you, chubs.”

  Chubs? Okay, time to take the gloves off here. “And why are you even going out with Jake? You hardly know him. Is it that hockey players are like, the new accessory? Carrie Underwood, Hillary Duff, Elisha Cuthbert, and now, you? OMG!”

  “You can rationalize it any way you want. I can see that you’re trying to worm your way back, and it’s not on. Why would any guy go back to beer when he’s had champagne?”

  That just showed how little she understood him, Jake loved beer. “I guess you must be pretty insecure if you have to talk to me like this. So I’ll lay it out for you. Jake’s a big boy and he can make his own choices. But I can see that you’re using him, and you don’t appreciate him for what he is. You’re always trying to manipulate him. I don’t have to do anything, he will eventually figure out exactly what a user you are. And I won’t have to lift a finger.”

  “Loser. You’re wrong about that, about everything. I thought I’d warn you to save you some effort. Whatever.” She flipped her hair in my general direction, and walked over to pick up her embroidered cloth hobo bag.

  I walked towards my room where I wanted to cool down in private. Partway, I paused and turned.

  “Hey Aspen, could I get your autograph?”

  “What the hell are you talking about?” she sneered at me.

  “I mean, I had no idea if you could act or not, since I missed your appearance as Girl #2 on the last straight-to-video blockbuster you did. But now that I see what a horrible beast really lies beneath that sunny exterior, wow, you can act!”

  “You bitch!” she screeched, and started coming towards me. Yikes, was she going to get violent here? She was a good seven inches taller and looked kind of strong. I started backing towards my bedroom door and just then Jake walked out of his bedroom, freshly showered with a white towel wrapped around his waist. He looked at me and then at Aspen, the two of us were in kind of a standoff position. Like boxers, if one boxer was allowed to fight about three weight classes down.

  “Everything okay here?” he wondered.

  BV spoke first, in a voice that was suddenly syrupy, “Fine Jakey, I’m off now.” Then she walked over and laid a big kiss on Jake, with tongue and everything. For the cherry on top, she squeezed his ass through the towel. His eyes were closed, but she was watching me. I merely smiled at her. Then she sashayed out of the house, with Jake and I both watching her. We didn’t say anything until the noise of her crappy old car’s exhaust faded away. When I looked over, Jake was watching me with an expression that looked almost… guilty.

  “Hey Frankie, you’re home really early today,” Jake said, nervously. “Uh, it’s great to see you. So, what’s for dinner tonight?”

  Dinner? Was that all he thought about? Maybe BV was telling the truth or a partial truth anyway.

  “Make your own damn dinner,” I suggested. “I’m going out tonight.”

  Jake

  For once I was excited to get back to L.A. Usually I loved being on the road: hanging out with the guys, clean hotel rooms, and crazy dinners together. Life seemed easier on the road. At first, I figured it was because Domer wasn’t with us. But when I walked in the door after midnight, I realized that everything was different now. Someone had left a light on for me, and the house looked nice and smelled good: fresh and slightly sweet. It felt like a real home here. I followed that sweet smell to the kitchen and opened the magic tin and found some oatmeal raisin cookies. I poured myself a glass of milk and grabbed a few cookies and sat down at the breakfast bar.

  Domer walked out of his room.

  “Thought I heard you.” He sat down across from me and stole a cookie. I protested, but I knew there were lots more in the tin.

  Domer grinned at me, “What’s wrong, can’t win without me?” We had dropped two games on the road.

  “You wish. How you doing anyway?”

  “Better, I’m going to practice tomorrow. If everything’s good, I want to play the next one.” He looked happy about that, and it would be great to have him back since Chips wasn’t as good. “I’m going back to bed now, but we’ll go to practice together tomorrow?”

  “Sure. ‘Night.” I got another cookie and headed off to bed too.

  The next day I slept in, and then we had a late morning practice. Afterwards, Domer had to stay later, since the trainers wanted to make sure that he was okay after going full out at practice. So I went home alone, did some laundry and made myself a couple of sandwiches. After I finished eating, there was a knock on the door.

  “Hey Jakey, welcome home!” Aspen was standing there. She looked hot, as usual, in really short shorts and a thin top. But lately she seemed to be dropping over a lot more, and I didn’t really like it. I liked it better when things were more casual between us. Still it was tough to say no to a booty call, especially one like her. She wanted to do it in the living room, but I wasn’t sure when Domer would be back, so we took it to my bedroom.

  “It’s nice to be alone for a change. Frankie’s home all the time. Does she not have a social life?” Aspen wondered as she unstrapped her complicated shoes.

  “She had a little scare the first week she was living here, and now she doesn’t like to go out at night. She’s not used to L.A. yet.” It wasn’t anything Frankie had said, but it was something I had noticed.

  “What kind of scare?”

  I explained to Aspen what had happened and how I had to rescue Frankie at the convenience store.

  “She should carry a rape whistle and some pepper spray,” suggested Aspen, “Or a little gun.”

  With Frankie’s temper, I’d be in serious danger if she started packing heat. “I don’t think Frankie would carry a gun, that’s not really a Canadian thing. Anyway, now that she has her own car, I don’t have to worry.”

  “Yeah, that’s pretty nice car for a student, I guess she has some money?”

  I shrugged. I didn’t think it was a big deal that I got her the car, but I didn’t want to get into it with Aspen. Talking to chicks about other chicks always led to trouble.

  Aspen was staring at me oddly, and then she said, “You know, I didn’t really like Frankie when she first got here.” She pulled off her top and wriggled out of her shorts. “But now I like her better.” Then she stood in front of me and undid her bra, watching my eyes as she slipped it off and her big tits popped out. Then she slipped off her G-string. She was bald, Hollywood-style. Not that it mattered, because she didn’t really like me going down on her.

  She walked over to where I was sitting on the edge of the bed, straddled me and pulled my head between her tits. Then she said softly, “You know, Jakey, if you wanna have a three-way with Frankie, I’d be down for that.”

  That sounded hot in theory, but for some reason it made me kind of queasy. And I could guarantee 100% that Frankie would not be interested.

  After we did it, I took a shower and when I came out, I heard voices arguing. I went out and saw that there seemed to be something going on between Frankie and Aspen. I was kind of hoping that Aspen would be gone before Frankie got home, but no such luck. I hadn’t even really seen Frankie since Saturday night, and now she started flipping out on me, telling me to make my own dinner and then slamming things in her room.

  I hated stuff like this, but I figured it was kind of my fault, and I needed to calm Frankie down. I knocked on her door, and she whipped it open angrily.

  “What?” She scowled at me.

  “Look, I’m sorry, I know why you’re upset. I figured you wouldn’t like it, but I didn’t think she’d say anything,” I explained. “It’s not something that I wanted to do either.”

  “What are you talking about?” Frankie asked, frowning.

  “The threesome.” She still looked puzzled, so I kept talking. “You, me and Aspen. It was all her idea, but I thought if I ignored it, she’d forget about it.”

  Frankie’s mouth
dropped open, and she was stunned into silence. First she started to giggle and then laugh hysterically. She had to sit down on her bed, and I laughed along with her, relieved that she wasn’t all pissed off. It seemed like we had spent enough time not getting each other, and it would be good to be able to get along again.

  56. Party Down

  “Why are you getting all excited about the party at Roady’s?” Jake asked me. I was wearing a new sundress that was black with neon-y flowers, and doing up my charm bracelet. Jake wasn’t going until later. He was doing his usual multitasking: relaxing on the couch with his feet up and his phone in one hand and a sandwich in the other. Some European soccer game was on the TV.

  “Duh, it’s the first party I’ve been to here. My first Los Angeles party.” I did a little rhumba dance move and swished my full skirt around; I was excited to go out.

  “Frankie, sit down,” he patted the couch beside him. Lately, he had been a lot more considerate to me, and that was nice. I was still playing it cool though: no flirting and nothing suggestive. And the reason for that started with “A” and ended with silicone enhancements.

  I plunked down on the couch. “Okay Debbie Downer, what is it?”

  “Frankie, what time is it?”

  I looked down at my watch, “It’s 2:30, why?”

  “Because the party is starting around 4:00 pm, no exciting party has ever started in the afternoon. It’s starting early so that all the guys with families, like Mally or Roady, can bring their kids. This will be as exciting as a party at Chuck E. Cheese or something like that.”

  “Oh.” That was kind of disappointing. I just thought we were starting early because it would be a pool party with outdoor activities before dinner. I stuck my lower lip out. “Rats.”

  “Sorry, Frankie.” Jake was staring at my mouth, and I wondered if my lipstick was smeared. “Didn’t want you getting your hopes up. So how come Roady’s picking you up?”

  “Oh, he had to come this way anyway, to pick up a big cake. I said I’d come early and help out Anne. When are you guys going?”

  “Uh, Aspen really wanted to come, so she’s driving over here first. We’ll go once she gets here.”

  I smiled tightly. She sure seemed to have him wrapped around her little finger. Do not get involved, Frankie. Ever since our showdown, I could hardly stand the sight of that phony, but I could act as sweet as she did. Her threesome suggestion made me realize that she was very nervous about Jake and me, no matter what she might claim. Sometimes Jake could be so clueless, but I figured he would eventually catch on. And in the meantime, I was getting along fine with him; we could hang out and I could totally imagine getting over him. Soon.

  I saw Billy pull up outside, so I went out to meet him. He was a big, stocky guy with reddish hair. Initially, I was a little scared of him. I had seen him get into a huge, bloody fight during one game I attended. But it turned out he was a beast on the ice and a pussycat at home, and now I quite liked him. I think he was a good captain for the team because of his work ethic. “I’m not the most talented guy,” he had told me, “So I work my ass off to make up for it.” That wasn’t entirely true, he was very talented and he had size too, but he wasn’t as naturally gifted as Jake.

  Their home was in Manhattan Beach, close geographically to our place but miles away in style. It was all grown up, like the kind of home your parents would have, with dark hardwood floors and built-in storage units and granite countertops in the kitchen and bathrooms. And it was big enough so that the various Kings, their wives, girlfriends, and kids were quickly absorbed into different rooms.

  When Jake walked in with BV, more than a few heads turned. I guess he had never brought her anywhere before. She had dressed up for the occasion, in a diaphanous cotton sundress and the first heels I had ever seen her wear, so she was the same height as Jake. I lost sight of both of them quickly, and the next time I saw her was out by the pool.

  I was sitting outside and chatting with Anne, who was pregnant and relaxing as much as a hostess could, when BV walked out to the edge of the pool. I don’t know where Jake was, but BV stood there, seeming to admire the turquoise water of the pool and then reached down and slowly pulled up her dress and took it off. She had the shocked attention of everyone around, but it turned out she had a very tiny white bikini underneath. She posed artfully by the pool, and even I had to admit she was stacked. Well, I had seen her naked, but the straining bits of cloth made her look even better. Every pants zipper in the vicinity ran the risk of bursting until she finally kicked off her heels and dove in. Then she executed a few perfect laps while all the guys waited for her to emerge all shiny and dripping, so they could find out if the white bikini was see-through when wet.

  “Hello, earth to Frankie!”

  I don’t know how long Anne had been talking to me, but I turned to see her looking very irritated. “Just ignore her for heaven’s sake,” she muttered at me, as she poked a straw into an organic juice box and handed it off to her younger son, who then toddled off happily.

  “Billy!” she called across the pool. He was the only one wisely not ogling BV, and he came over and sat beside us. “Talk to her,” Anne commanded. It was clearly something they had discussed already, and he and Anne both sat on the lounger and looked at me with serious faces. Billy looked kind of uncomfortable, like Anne was making him lecture me. Possibly she had told him exactly what to say, since I clearly hadn’t been listening to her advice.

  “Are you a loyal person, Frankie?” Billy asked kindly. He was a nice dad to his kids, and the tone he was using made me feel like I was his wayward daughter.

  “To a fault,” I sighed. Then I looked at him, “But what are you talking about?”

  “I’m talking about Cookie, you and Cookie. It’s nice to be loyal, but sometimes, y’know, maybe it’s wasted. Don’t get me wrong, I think Cookie’s a great guy, but he’s young and he’s nowhere near ready to settle down.”

  Anne interjected, “There’s lots of other guys who would like to go out with you, if you gave them a little encouragement.”

  “You mean around here?” I looked around, but to be honest I didn’t really see anyone I liked. “But isn’t it weird to date another guy on the team? I think that would be very awkward. Plus it can’t be good for team harmony.”

  Billy nodded, while Anne shook her head. “True,” he said, “It doesn’t have to be a player, there’s some guys here who are friends or relatives. But it’s not like you guys were married or anything. How long did you go out for?”

  Okay, the answer to that was pretty embarrassing. Either not at all, or maybe about three weeks. “Not long,” I replied softly.

  Billy shrugged. “So, not a big deal, right?” I think maybe he was trying to tell me it wasn’t a big deal for Jake. Anne added, “Just be open to meeting new people, Frankie.” His duty done, Billy happily escaped. Anne muttered something about hostess responsibilities, patted me on the head, and took off as well.

  I wandered around the house a little and ended up talking to Dean Jones about university. He was finishing his degree both in the summertime and during the season on-line. That was pretty impressive, as playing hockey was a fulltime job. He told me that his college coach took education really seriously and insisted on players studying hard. I explained I’d be finishing up my degree this summer as well.

  “Summer session is kind of nice, more concentrated and yet more relaxed,” I commented, since I’d done intercession courses before. “But in Vancouver, the weather is so nice that you want to be outside.”

  “That’s what it’s like all the time living in L.A., I’m either going to the rink or studying when it feels like I should be going to the beach.” He laughed, but he struck me as a pretty intense person and not a beach bum.

  “Are you the only one on the team finishing up your degree?” I figured you’d have to be determined to spend your off time studying, especially once you were making good money.

  “No, I’m not sure how many
guys are doing it, but it’s more common now among the younger guys. People think more about life after hockey. Bear’s doing his as well,” He motioned over to a big, blondish guy across the room who was talking to Jake. They were both looking at us, and when they noticed us looking at them, the blonde guy came over. He was definitely cute, with wavy hair, twinkly grey eyes and a wide smile. With these hockey players, I could never tell if their teeth were real or not.

  “Hi, I’m Christian Bauer,” he said. “You’re Frankie, right?”

  Jake

  Aspen was almost as excited as Frankie about the party. I guess I had never actually taken her to any team functions, even though we met at one. I preferred it that way, but she had insisted on this because she really wanted to meet “my connected friends.” I got a big reaction when I walked in with her, but I didn’t know if it was her or the fact I showed up with a chick at all. I introduced Aspen to Lovey and Amanda right off since I knew she wouldn’t leave me alone otherwise, and then I went to get a beer.

  “Cookie, what’s a girl like that doing with you?” D.J. wondered.

  “Smiling,” I told him, grinning, “because I know how to make women happy.”

  “But can you keep them happy?” Duper wondered, looking over at Frankie. She was talking to some of the wives.

  Lurch was staring at Aspen’s rack. “Wow. Is she your girlfriend?”

  “Naw, just a friend.” That sounded like fucking preschool, but the whole reason I was hanging with Aspen was because I didn’t want to have a girlfriend.

  “Why don’t you just say she’s your girlfriend?” Domer asked me as we went to check out the gaming room.

  “She’s not. We’re not into that commitment stuff.”

  “You’re just fooling yourself. You see her all the time. What’s the difference?”

  I didn’t like hearing that. It kind of put me on the defensive. “Me? What about you and Theresa? I don’t hear you calling her your girlfriend.”